Zephyr kain't find a girlfriend

Zephyr found himself, alone, walking once again in this strange human town. He couldn't lie to himself, human towns always seemed so... flat to him. Not to hate on being flat, of course, he didn't have any strong preferences -there-, hehe. But either way, elves tended to build the skeletons of their cities in a geometric shape and then build to fill that shape. Here... they just sort of haphazardly build horizontally as they went along and then built up from there. In any case, the king shook his head to clear his thoughts again. He was actually a bit nervous, for once. He's trimmed his goatee off, giving him somewhat of an appearance like this: http://safebooru.org/index.php?page=post&s=view&id=627518  Though with blonde hair and green eyes. He's dressed in a green jacket and white shirt, something like http://safebooru.org/index.php?page=post&s=view&id=1304133 , taking on human fashion sense pretty easily. Its a distinct lack of places to show off his muscle definition sort of bothered him, but eh. When in Alexandria, do as the Alexandrians do. Hey, that's kind of catchy. Might coin that one.

He had reached the King estate before long, the soft lanterns lighting the pathways ahead of him. He had to admit, the constant cover of night made this place pretty damn scenic. From here, he could see the massive Colosseum, lit up across the lake, along with the Auction House. Theta's place was at lakeside itself, a little ways down the hill from here. And the enormous school, some ways to his right. Nice place, shame his duties prevented him from enrolling. ...And that line of thought reminded him again why he was here. He could already hear his counselors nagging him again...

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"Your Majesty, certainly by now you realize that Shaman Medly intends to pursue a romantic relationship with the hero Theta." Zephyr had sighed. "Yeah, yeah, no doubt about it. But I've known Medly for years and I'm sure she intends to recant officially instead of outright breaking her vows. No action is necessary." "You misunderstand me, my lord. I'm not questioning the Metal Shaman's integrity, but rather bringing up an opportunity." "...I'm sorry, what? What opportunity?" "This is a chance to form a strong alliance with the hero's developing nation. Your council has already convened on this and it was decided that having you seek an Elekin bride may further strengthen our ties." "...Whoa whoa whoa, don't I get a say in this?" "You do, your majesty, but please think of your nation's future. ...Besides, it's not like you haven't eyed a good deal of them, hm?" "...I -guess- you're right. Aren't you concerned they'll feel like they're just a political tool? I get why you guys think this is important, but Iiii don't feel entirely comfortable dragging some girl off for political reasons." "Of course, your Majesty is free to pursue a bride in whatever manner he sees fit, if he feels it will be more genuine." "...Sigh. Alright then. Typical chain of command while I'm gone then. Don't burn the place down and make sure visitors are treated well. That goes double for the regulars. I don't want to get back and hear you turned out Lilili just because I wasn't here." "Of course, your highness." "...man what  have I gotten myself into. Alright then, guess it's time to put on the charm..."

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He took a deep breath. "Well, here goes nothing." He wasn't sure exactly where the elekin girls hung out for fun in town proper, and making a personal call in their homes would probably be a bit inappropriate, so he began to approach the school. Ice Cloister. He remembered visiting the place back at Theta's little dinner party plus announcements. Nice place. Seemed to have a few sweet spots to hang out, so... Leeet's start there.

It was a pretty cozy cafe in the middle of serving lunch. Girls were quickly moving back and forth, taking orders from the patrons. Oddly enough, Zephyr noticed they were dressed in... traditional elven garments, and were wearing fake pointy ears. He was confused, a moment, until he noticed the sign next to the door. It took him a moment to read the human letters, but he got it after a moment - 'Elvaana Week! Enjoy exotic tastes from a new land!' He spied one waitress carrying a fragrant bowl of landshark fin soup to one customer, and he chuckled a bit to himself. "Seems I timed my arrival well enough... A nice little taste of home." From behind him, he heard loud complaining. "Hey, buddy, do you always talk to yourself? Move it, you're blocking the door!" Zephyr moved a bit inwards, looking at the irate man behind himself. "My apologies. Bon appetite." He said, quickly moving to sit down at an unoccupied booth.

A waitress quickly came up to him, dressed in a low-cut dress reminiscent of a dancer. It was a good look for her, showing off her heaving bosom, her supple bottom, her- tail? Oh! She was an elekin... A nice little calico tail. A cough returned his attention to her eyes and the woman forced a smile. "May I help you, sir?" Without hesitation, the king nodded. "Laguane, if you please, my dear." he said, without looking at the menu. Call it a test, perhaps. She wrote that down and glanced up. "And to eat with that?" A grin broke out across his face as she seemed to recognize he was ordering a drink. "Dina korral, aelir ra vanys." he responded, completely in Elvish. The woman finished writing that down, and he took the moment to glance at her name tag. 'Millie'. Interesting. "We'll be right back with that, sir." she said, and then was off as fast as she arrived. He didn't make the best first impression, he thought to himself, but he appreciated the effort she apparently took into learning their language. ...Then again, maybe she was wearing that fancy lipstick and he didn't notice. He frowned again at that thought. Human magic was such a strange thing.

As he waited for his meal, he noticed another young Elekin with dark skin sitting at a nearby booth by herself. Leaning over, he began to address her. "Excuse me, miss-" She glanced up for a moment. "Not interested." "But..." "Not. Interested." "You don't even know what I was-" With that, the napkins on Zephyr's table burst into flame. "It doesn't matter. I have little business with a playboy king. Not interested." She then picked her things up and moved several booths down, leaving the confused Zephyr to quickly extinguish the fire. "...I suppose my reputation must precede me." he murmured. "And it's... a negative one? Maybe I've made a faux pas somewhere..." He pondered on that for a number of minutes before the waitress returned with his food, setting it down.

Dina Korral was a decently popular dish back home that borrowed a little bit of inspiration from human cuisine that had been imported in the before-time. The wooly rhinos of Elvaana provided both meats and milks for the population, and what they would do was prepare a pineapple marinade for choice cuts of the meat, start dry-frying various spice seeds in a hot pan, add freshly churned rhino butter and then begin browning the meat, adding various spices and vegetables and a spicy, cream-based sauce, serve over a bed of lettuce. The 'vanys' on the side was a simple mix of cauliflower and potatoes fried together. Overall, a hearty dish. The drink placed next to his plate was a dry stout. He inspected the glass a moment. Hmm. Imported from home, definitely. The food smelled delicious as well, whoever they had on staff to research and cook this definitely deserved whatever they were being paid.

"Is everything to your liking, sir?" Millie spoke up again. Zephyr blinked, snapped out of his thoughts, and smiled up at the woman. "Yes, excellent in fact. By the way, miss Millie-" He was careful to bring up her name to show he was paying attention to something above her chestline, "-my name is Zephyr, king of Elvaana. Are you free after work? I'd love to have a word with you..." The waitress looked nervous a moment and shook her said. "I'm sorry, no... I need to go and, um... bathe my dragon." she said quietly. "...If there's anything else you need, please call over." She then hurried off to take more orders. Zephyr stared, and sighed. "Bathe her dragon. She could have at least thought up a better excuse..." He slumped on his arm a bit and thought, a moment. This... he'd fought -actual- dragons, the landshark behemoth Dorzea, and lead his people into war against the Glutton, but this might just be one of the harder challenges he's faced. His thoughts quickly turned back to his food however as he began to dig in. The result was... quite a bit better than he expected. They hadn't been able to get all of the proper ingredients for this, it seemed, so some substitutions were made... and arguably better than the original. Or maybe the cooking methods of modern chefs were that much better. He'd have to look into this...

When he was done, he left a sizable lump of Gil on the table. 5,000, to be exact. He didn't know how much the meal cost, and Millie seemed to be absent, but he did know this was well over what the equivalent price would be. She did deserve a sizable tip, and the food was damn good, so why not. As he left the diner, he noticed a more familiar Elekin face walking through the snow-covered streets of the cloister - the young, energetic and shadow-faced Savannah - Theta's adopted, if he remembered correctly. ...Hm, maybe he should try a little closer to home...

He quietly approached the woman, easily recognizable by her manic grin, huge ponytail, and the little cat following her on a leash. The cat... was dressed up in some sort of cat-sized sweater. Adorable. Savannah herself had her hands full with a box of some sort. Her destination seemed nearby - a little park within the Ice Cloister that perhaps was used to help climatology studies. Not that Zephyr himself knew this, of course, but... Either way, Savannah seemed to have other plans for it. She set the box down nearby a large clearing in the park, cleared her throat, and begin to chant a spell. With one gesture, she suddenly tore some of the ground asunder with a Quake, following it by casting a Blizzard spell. Only a small ice crystal formed, but it seemed to be enough as Savannah reached out to it, and... Zephyr's curiosity grew. It seemed like she was calling out to it, not much differently than Theta. The ice boulder dropped into the crater and then exploded into a field of ice to fill it, creating a frozen lake with little hassle. With another flick of her wrist, the top of the ice was blasted into a super-smooth surface. She grinned while looking out over it, then took a look around as her cat began to mewl. It was then she noticed Zephyr.

"Oh, hi! King Zephyr, right?" she called over, waving. He returned the greeting with a smile and walked over. "Yes, and you are Savannah, Theta's daughter? Pleased to see you again. ...What are you doing?" he wondered aloud. She gestured to the lake. "Trying something! I don't go to school here, but I just couldn't help but try and make something fun! You know how you slip and slide on ice normally?" Zephyr made a bit of a face. "Sorry, no. The climate back home only allowed for snow on the highest peaks. Ice is one element we don't have a lot of experience with." She grinned again. "Well, today's your lucky day!" She leaned down to check his feet a moment, then nodded, digging into the box. Zephyr's confusion only increased when she pulled out a large pair of shoes. "I made these myself!" She turned them over, revealing a slightly grooved surface with a single metal cleat in the heel of each. "I call them Slips! They should let you push yourself forward on the ice and come to a stop if you need to. Try them for me? Pleaaaase?"

Zephyr found the woman's request hard to resist, and relented. "Very well! I suppose it couldn't hurt..." He pulled on the shoes and then cautiously stepped onto the ice. Immediately his feet wanted to slip different ways but he planted his heels, keeping himself in place. "...I think I understand this well enough... let's try..." He lifted his heels as he pushed off, but immediately lost traction and slipped to the painful ice underneath him. "..ugh." "Are you okay??" "Mostly... my pride was injured." He carefully dug his heels into the ice again and pushed himself to his feet, wobbling just a bit before carefully getting back into position. "Leaning forward on the front of my feet to slide is a bit... I don't know, it makes me a tad uncomfortable. But let's try again." He pushed off again from the cleats and actually managed to get some distance and speed this time! ...Sliding, sliding... He quickly realized that he was rushing directly for a tree. Panicking a bit, he forgot entirely about digging his heels and instead unsheathed his scimitars, digging them into the ice. To his surprise, he changed direction instead of coming to a complete stop.

Savannah hmmed. "Blades...? Maybe there's something to that... Ooh, I've got a new design in mind already!" she exclaimed as Zephyr slid to a stop near her again. "Thank you! Is there anything you'd like in return?" The king nervously chuckled. "Uh, well, would a date be sufficient?" Savannah's grin turned into a frown for a moment. "Sorry... I'm taken! And I'm also gay! Oh wait, elves don't know what gay means. I only like women! But... huuuh? Do you really like me like that?" Zephyr sort of collapsed into the snow and began prying off the shoes. "W-well... no, I suppose not, but I would've... actually this is a bit awkward to explain given the circumstances..." "Oh, don't worry about that! Lemme see." She knelt down to look directly into her eyes, which flared up bright yellow. "...Oooooh, you're looking for a bride?" Zephyr dropped the shoe he was holding in shock. "W-what did you...?" "Read your mind, silly! Thought it would make things a little less awkward! But it's still pretty awkward! Hmm... tell you what, maybe I can be your winggirl instead? I don't really know who's available at the moment though, Poppa seems to be catching girls like a jar of honey and flies..." Zephyr was a bit floored at the revelation that she could and would just barge into his head like that, but... her intentions seemed well enough. "I... appreciate the concern. Maybe I will need that help... but I'd also like to at least try to do this on my own to start with. A man has to have -some- confidence in himself, doesn't he?" he smiles. She giggled at that. "Maybe! Okay, good luck then, your majesty! Iiii'm gonna duck back off to the house and make a new pair of these!" She dropped the Slips back into the box. "Seeya!" And then just as quickly as he spotted them, she and the cat were gone once more.

Zephyr sat in the snow for several moments. "Where the hell am I going to go next?" he murmured to himself, before realizing that maybe his earlier thought of 'closer to home' wasn't such a bad idea after all. He got up and sheepishly started heading towards the block of houses at the edge of the lake on the estate. Nice place, really. He stepped up to the door of the house next to Theta's and knocked. He could hear a pair of footsteps approaching, and listening, he heard some talking. "I really appreciate you helping me move out, Tina...?" "Yeah, yeah, no probs Wheelsy. I know Abby woulda if it meant she didn't have to see him, but you know how it is. Drama, drama, drama. I'm sick of drama, girl. I think she made the right call to go fuck off for a bit insteada tryin' to force herself to help out." "Will you two be alright?" "Yeah, yeah. We'll have the Nezumiboo and Tipsy-Tits here, this place ain't ever gonna get dull."

The door opened, revealing a woman in an outlandish 'street' outfit carrying some boxes, and a black-and-white haired companion stiffly pushing a wheelchair, also loaded with boxes. Tina stopped a moment to regard Zephyr. "Hey, ain't you that king? Whatchoo lookin' for? Theta's house is next door, if you were wantin' to speak to Theta." Zephyr returned the look for several moments, trying to remember - she did seem familiar - maybe one of the girls from the events at Elvaana? He regretted that he didn't get a chance to memorize all of their names. "No, no, I needn't bother him. I was actually wondering if I could bother a few of you lovely ladies for a moment - though... it seems you're busy. I could... come back later? Or perhaps I could help?" Dahlila seemed interested, and nodded. "Okay..?" Tina gave the man a look and sighed, glancing at Dahlila for a moment, then setting her boxes down. "You have two minutes."

Zephyr seemed relieved to hear this and began speaking in earnest. "I'm looking to get to know some of the ladies around here. Are any of you interested in the culture or exotic sights of Elvaana? Perhaps you want to see the sort of fun we can have, or are interested in courtly life?" At this, two more women walked in, the modestly dressed T-69 and her partner, T-33, who, strangely, was sipping away at a glass of scotch instead of her usual wine. Tina looked at Zephyr rather deadpan. "Wow, the girls you hit on gotta be easy if -that- works." "I don't know, it rather sounded like a lot of fun..." 33's voice drifted from behind the group. This caused her partner to shake her a bit. "Thurti, honestly! Do you have no shame? You and I are..." "Hehe. You know I have very little shame, Sixti, and deep down, neither do you, love." The book writer flushed red. "Hush." she whispered fervently. Dahlila looked thoughtful, but shook her head.

Tina rolled her eyes, and spoke up. "Look, bro, if you here to just hit on girls, maybe you shoulda put a note in the paper instead of just hitting on random girls and embarassing yo ass." Zephyr seemed to be at a loss for words. "I didn't say I was-" "Well, you denyin' it?" "...no, I suppose not." "Heh, look at this guy. He can't even be a tactful liar. Was vagina just handed to you on a silver platter back in Elvaana or what? I'm not seeing the King Charming I keep hearing about." Zephyr flushed a bit. "I'm still brushing up on my human tongue. I apologize if I come off as offensive." "Nah, not offensive, just like the new kid in town, trying to sneak off with portions of the clam buffet. And by the by, everyone in front of you's taken already."

The excuses Zephyr was making was only half the truth, really. He was feeling extremely uncomfortable with all of this. He could usually tell what kind of girl was his type for casual encounters. This was a bit different though, he was trying to find a partner for life. And for once, the king found himself completely out of his element. What -was- he doing? It was like Tina was saying - he was just making a fool out of himself. And this was just for political reasons, too. Bluh. He suddenly felt a little sick with himself. Why -had- he let his advisors talk him into this? He cleared his throat after several seconds of silence. "You're right. I apologize for bothering you all. Good luck with the... moving?" he asked, looking at the boxes. He thought again about offering his help, but Tina had already picked hers back up and the conversation had taken a turn for the awkward. "...good day."

He slunk off, finding himself heading next door. Maybe if he spoke to Theta, he could sort this out a bit. He went next door and knocked, this time, the door opening to... a blue-haired elven maiden in a liquid metal gown. Her eyes widened as hers met his. "Z-zephyr!" Medly stammered. "...Ah, Medly..." He stared at her a good few seconds, the awkwardness intensifying. "...enjoying yourself?" he tried to make conversation, switching to Elvish but that seemed to panic her a little bit. "It's not what you think. Not yet, at least. We haven't- I haven't- you don't need to-" Zephyr realized quickly what she thought he was here for and shook his head. "Relax, Medly. I didn't mean it like that. Frankly, whatever you and Theta are doing isn't my business, even if my duties say it is. How many years have we been friends?" She nervously laughed, letting the king inside. "Uh-huuuh... right, right, I knew that. So... why are you here, your majesty?" He made a face. "My godsdamned advisors are insisting that because the hero Theta is courting you, that I should be finding an Elekin bride to strengthen political ties. They've gone completely bonkers. And I must have too, because I'm here trying to do it. Now, I'm not blaming you for this, I'm more blaming these idiotic councilors who have made clear they intend to make things difficult for me if I don't go through with this. So far, though, all I've managed to do is look extremely stupid or callous. I actually came to have a talk with Theta... but it's good to see you too." Medly's expression relaxed a bit and she looked at Zephyr with pity. "Oh, sheez. Well, Theta isn't here at the moment, but maybe I could talk with you about this for a bit. Why don't you have a seat while I fix something to eat?" Zephyr raised an eyebrow. "You cook now?" Medly grinned a bit. "No, but I can wake up a redhead who does." And with that, she darted off, leaving Zephyr to the living room.

It was a nice little place, the king had to admit. He had a seat on one of the cushy armchairs around and began waiting as Medly set off. Though it wasn't long before curiosity got the better of him. He stood up and began to wander around the house, checking out the mirrors hanging on the wall, peeking into Theta's workshop... And how many bedrooms in this place? He had to admire that they did quite a bit with a small area to work with. It was while he was wandering, however, that he heard a voice, singing softly, from one of the bedrooms. A soft, beautiful voice, calling words that were alien to him, yet somehow... nostalgic. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ci9u8Ht1aao  He edged forward and peeked into the room and was surprised when the room was full of wonderous paintings, depicting all manner of strange things. He could recognize Archmagister Gabriel and Katriene in one... very curious. Two easels stood in the room, one covered, and the other with a woman with long, blue hair standing in front of it, putting the finishing touches on it. She looked over her shoulder at Zephyr, smiling as if expecting him, then stepped back. The painting she had just finished depicted... Zephyr walking into this very room and staring at the woman making a painting. He thought his heart stopped for several moments, but then she spoke.

"You seem a bit surprised, your Majesty. Please, come in. My name is Luna." She turned back to the painting and took it off the easel to hang with the others. Zephyr noticed that in the painting, all of the paintings across the room were instead... portraits of the women he had stopped to speak with. "What... is this?" he asked with a bit of frightened wonder, walking in despite himself. "These? Well... Lately I've been visited by all manner of vivid dreams. I've felt a bit obligated to put them to canvas on waking up. And... they always turn out a little bit prophetic. What do you think?" "...they're very beautiful, though... I don't understand this power of yours. You knew I would be coming?" She smiled. "Kind of, yeah! And I've been looking forward to it. Ever since -this- dream." she pointed to the picture of the Renegade, "I've been more and more curious about returning to Elvaana and learning about it. I'm a definite patron of the arts, and your people don't seem to be wanting for interesting culture... I wonder, do you think you could take me there, some day?" He was stunned for a moment, but he smiled and sat down. "I'd love to. And I think I'd like to get to know a little bit more about yourself as well, in the meantime." Luna grinned. "I'd be delighted." Well, this was going to be a bit awkward to talk with Medly about, but... maybe this whole thing wasn't going to end so badly after all.