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- *WHAT PETS WRITE IN THEIR DIARIES*
- *Excerpts from a Dog's Diary......*
- 8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
- 9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
- 9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
- 10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
- 12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
- 1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
- 3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
- 5:00 pm - Milk Bones! My favorite thing!
- 7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
- 8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
- 11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
- *Excerpts from a Cat's Daily Diary...*
- Day 983 of my captivity...
- My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
- They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are
- fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.
- Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I
- nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.
- The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape.. In an
- attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
- To day I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their
- feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it
- clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made
- condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am.
- Bastards.
- There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was
- placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However,
- I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my
- confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what
- this means and how to use it to my advantage.
- Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my
- tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try
- this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.
- I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and
- snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly
- released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is
- obviously retarded.
- The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with
- the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My
- captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell,
- so he is safe. For now ...
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