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Mar 22nd, 2016
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  1. import os, time
  2. from time import sleep
  3. import random
  4.  
  5. def cls():
  6. if os.name == 'nt':
  7. os.system('cls')
  8. else:
  9. os.system("clear")
  10.  
  11. sus="-"*35
  12.  
  13. depo=["rock","paper","scissors","lizard","spock"]
  14. depo2=("exit")
  15. depo3=("fuck you","fucktard","douchebag","pussy","shithead","asshat","fudge packer")
  16. answers=("Yep, no doubt about it, your father should have pulled out earlier.","I’m not a proctologist but I sure know an asshole when I see one","Who lit the fuse on your tampon?","If I wanted to listen to an asshole, I’d fart.","Acting like a dick wont make yours any bigger","well... your ass looks fat in those pants.","Who ate your bowl of sunshine this morning thundercloud?")
  17.  
  18. user_score=0
  19. computer_score=0
  20. game_tie=0
  21.  
  22. while True:
  23. print()
  24. print(" ------------------------------")
  25. print(' Wins: ', user_score, ' |')
  26. print(' Loses: ', computer_score, ' |')
  27. print(' Ties: ', game_tie, ' |')
  28. print(" ------------------------------")
  29. print()
  30. print(" Rock, paper, scissors, lizard, or Spock? Type exit or press ENTER to quit:")
  31. print()
  32. print(" NOTE: TYPE CHOICES IN ALL LOWER CASE.")
  33. print()
  34. print()
  35. x=input(" SELECTION: ")
  36. cls()
  37.  
  38. if x in depo3:
  39. print()
  40. print(" _ _ ")
  41. print(" \ / ")
  42. print(" | \ / | ")
  43. print(" | | ")
  44. print(" ")
  45. print(" ___________ ")
  46. print(" / \ ")
  47. print(" / \ ")
  48. print()
  49. print()
  50. print(random.choice(answers))
  51. sleep(3.0)
  52. exit()
  53.  
  54. if x in depo2:
  55. exit()
  56.  
  57. if x not in depo:
  58. print ("INVALID SELECTION")
  59. sleep(1.0)
  60. cls()
  61. continue
  62.  
  63. pc=random.choice(depo)
  64. sleep(0.5)
  65. print (("Computer picked {}.").format(pc))
  66. if x==pc:
  67. sleep(0.5)
  68. print (("\nIt's a draw.\n{}").format(sus))
  69. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  70. game_tie=game_tie+1
  71. cls()
  72.  
  73.  
  74. elif x=="rock" and pc=="scissors":
  75. sleep(0.5)
  76. print (("\nYOU WIN! Rock smashes scissors.\n{}").format(sus))
  77. print()
  78. print(" | | ")
  79. print(" | | ")
  80. print(" | | ")
  81. print(" ")
  82. print(" | | ")
  83. print(" \ / ")
  84. print(" \ __________ / ")
  85. print()
  86. print()
  87. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  88. user_score=user_score+1
  89. cls()
  90. elif x=="rock" and pc=="spock":
  91. sleep(0.5)
  92. print (("\nYOU LOSE! Spock vaporizes rock.\n{}").format(sus))
  93. print()
  94. print(" | | ")
  95. print(" | | ")
  96. print(" | | ")
  97. print(" ")
  98. print(" __________ ")
  99. print(" / \ ")
  100. print(" / \ ")
  101. print()
  102. print()
  103. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  104. computer_score=computer_score+1
  105. cls()
  106. elif x=="rock" and pc=="lizard":
  107. sleep(0.5)
  108. print (("\nYOU WIN! Rock crushes lizard.\n{}").format(sus))
  109. print()
  110. print(" | | ")
  111. print(" | | ")
  112. print(" | | ")
  113. print(" ")
  114. print(" | | ")
  115. print(" \ / ")
  116. print(" \ __________ / ")
  117. print()
  118. print()
  119. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  120. user_score=user_score+1
  121. cls()
  122. elif x=="rock" and pc=="paper":
  123. sleep(0.5)
  124. print (("\nYOU LOSE! Paper covers rock.\n{}").format(sus))
  125. print()
  126. print(" | | ")
  127. print(" | | ")
  128. print(" | | ")
  129. print(" ")
  130. print(" __________ ")
  131. print(" / \ ")
  132. print(" / \ ")
  133. print()
  134. print()
  135. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  136. computer_score=computer_score+1
  137. cls()
  138.  
  139.  
  140. elif x=="paper" and pc=="rock":
  141. sleep(0.5)
  142. print (("\nYOU WIN! Paper beats rock,\n{}").format(sus))
  143. print()
  144. print(" | | ")
  145. print(" | | ")
  146. print(" | | ")
  147. print(" ")
  148. print(" | | ")
  149. print(" \ / ")
  150. print(" \ __________ / ")
  151. print()
  152. print()
  153. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  154. user_score=user_score+1
  155. cls()
  156. elif x=="paper" and pc=="scissors":
  157. sleep(0.5)
  158. print (("\nYOU LOSE! Scissors cut paper\n{}").format(sus))
  159. print()
  160. print(" | | ")
  161. print(" | | ")
  162. print(" | | ")
  163. print(" ")
  164. print(" __________ ")
  165. print(" / \ ")
  166. print(" / \ ")
  167. print()
  168. print()
  169. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  170. computer_score=computer_score+1
  171. cls()
  172. elif x=="paper" and pc=="spock":
  173. sleep(0.5)
  174. print (("\nYOU WIN! Paper dispoves Spock.\n{}").format(sus))
  175. print()
  176. print(" | | ")
  177. print(" | | ")
  178. print(" | | ")
  179. print(" ")
  180. print(" | | ")
  181. print(" \ / ")
  182. print(" \ __________ / ")
  183. print()
  184. print()
  185. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  186. user_score=user_score+1
  187. cls()
  188. elif x=="paper" and pc=="lizard":
  189. sleep(0.5)
  190. print (("\nYOU LOSE! Lizard eats paper.\n{}").format(sus))
  191. print()
  192. print(" | | ")
  193. print(" | | ")
  194. print(" | | ")
  195. print(" ")
  196. print(" __________ ")
  197. print(" / \ ")
  198. print(" / \ ")
  199. print()
  200. print()
  201. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  202. computer_score=computer_score+1
  203. cls()
  204.  
  205.  
  206. elif x=="scissors" and pc=="paper":
  207. sleep(0.5)
  208. print (("\nYOU WIN! Scissors cuts paper.\n{}").format(sus))
  209. print()
  210. print(" | | ")
  211. print(" | | ")
  212. print(" | | ")
  213. print(" ")
  214. print(" | | ")
  215. print(" \ / ")
  216. print(" \ __________ / ")
  217. print()
  218. print()
  219. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  220. user_score=user_score+1
  221. cls()
  222. elif x=="scissors" and pc=="lizard":
  223. sleep(0.5)
  224. print (("\nYOU WIN! Scissors decapitates liazrd.\n{}").format(sus))
  225. print()
  226. print(" | | ")
  227. print(" | | ")
  228. print(" | | ")
  229. print(" ")
  230. print(" | | ")
  231. print(" \ / ")
  232. print(" \ __________ / ")
  233. print()
  234. print()
  235. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  236. user_score=user_score+1
  237. cls()
  238. elif x=="scissors" and pc=="spock":
  239. sleep(0.5)
  240. print (("\nYOU LOSE!Spock smashes scissors.\n{}").format(sus))
  241. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  242. computer_score=computer_score+1
  243. cls()
  244. elif x=="scissors" and pc=="rock":
  245. sleep(0.5)
  246. print (("\nYOU LOSE! Rock smashes scissors.\n{}").format(sus))
  247. print()
  248. print(" | | ")
  249. print(" | | ")
  250. print(" | | ")
  251. print(" ")
  252. print(" __________ ")
  253. print(" / \ ")
  254. print(" / \ ")
  255. print()
  256. print()
  257. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  258. computer_score=computer_score+1
  259. cls()
  260.  
  261.  
  262. elif x=="lizard" and pc=="paper":
  263. sleep(0.5)
  264. print (("\nYOU WIN! Lizard eats paper.\n{}").format(sus))
  265. print()
  266. print(" | | ")
  267. print(" | | ")
  268. print(" | | ")
  269. print(" ")
  270. print(" | | ")
  271. print(" \ / ")
  272. print(" \ __________ / ")
  273. print()
  274. print()
  275. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  276. user_score=user_score+1
  277. cls()
  278. elif x=="lizard" and pc=="rock":
  279. sleep(0.5)
  280. print (("\nYOU LOSE! Rock crushes lizard.\n{}").format(sus))
  281. print()
  282. print(" | | ")
  283. print(" | | ")
  284. print(" | | ")
  285. print(" ")
  286. print(" __________ ")
  287. print(" / \ ")
  288. print(" / \ ")
  289. print()
  290. print()
  291. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  292. computer_score=computer_score+1
  293. cls()
  294. elif x=="lizard" and pc=="spock":
  295. sleep(0.5)
  296. print (("\nYOU WIN! Lizard poisons Spock.\n{}").format(sus))
  297. print()
  298. print(" | | ")
  299. print(" | | ")
  300. print(" | | ")
  301. print(" ")
  302. print(" | | ")
  303. print(" \ / ")
  304. print(" \ __________ / ")
  305. print()
  306. print()
  307. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  308. user_score=user_score+1
  309. cls()
  310. elif x=="lizard" and pc=="scissors":
  311. sleep(0.5)
  312. print (("\nYOU LOSE! Scissors decapitates lizard.\n{}").format(sus))
  313. print()
  314. print(" | | ")
  315. print(" | | ")
  316. print(" | | ")
  317. print(" ")
  318. print(" __________ ")
  319. print(" / \ ")
  320. print(" / \ ")
  321. print()
  322. print()
  323. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  324. computer_score=computer_score+1
  325. cls()
  326.  
  327.  
  328. elif x=="spock" and pc=="paper":
  329. sleep(0.5)
  330. print (("\nYOU LOSE! Paper disproves Spock.\n{}").format(sus))
  331. print()
  332. print(" | | ")
  333. print(" | | ")
  334. print(" | | ")
  335. print(" ")
  336. print(" __________ ")
  337. print(" / \ ")
  338. print(" / \ ")
  339. print()
  340. print()
  341. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  342. computer_score=computer_score+1
  343. cls()
  344. elif x=="spock" and pc=="scissors":
  345. sleep(0.5)
  346. print (("\nYOU WIN! Spock smashes scissors.\n{}").format(sus))
  347. print()
  348. print(" | | ")
  349. print(" | | ")
  350. print(" | | ")
  351. print(" ")
  352. print(" | | ")
  353. print(" \ / ")
  354. print(" \ __________ / ")
  355. print()
  356. print()
  357. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  358. user_score=user_score+1
  359. cls()
  360. elif x=="spock" and pc=="lizard":
  361. sleep(0.5)
  362. print (("\nYOU LOSE! Lizard poisons Spock.\n{}").format(sus))
  363. print()
  364. print(" | | ")
  365. print(" | | ")
  366. print(" | | ")
  367. print(" ")
  368. print(" __________ ")
  369. print(" / \ ")
  370. print(" / \ ")
  371. print()
  372. print()
  373. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  374. computer_score=computer_score+1
  375. cls()
  376. elif x=="spock" and pc=="rock":
  377. sleep(0.5)
  378. print (("\nYOU WIN! Spock vaporizes rock.\n{}").format(sus))
  379. print()
  380. print(" | | ")
  381. print(" | | ")
  382. print(" | | ")
  383. print(" ")
  384. print(" | | ")
  385. print(" \ / ")
  386. print(" \ __________ / ")
  387. print()
  388. print()
  389. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  390. user_score=user_score+1
  391. cls()
  392.  
  393.  
  394. else:
  395. sleep(0.5)
  396. print (("\nYOU LOSE! {} beats {}\n{}").format(pc,x,sus))
  397. print()
  398. print(" | | ")
  399. print(" | | ")
  400. print(" | | ")
  401. print(" ")
  402. print(" __________ ")
  403. print(" / \ ")
  404. print(" / \ ")
  405. print()
  406. print()
  407. input("Try Again? Press Enter to Continue... ")
  408. computer_score=computer_score+1
  409. cls()
  410. input()
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