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SilentOrion

Open Heart

Aug 16th, 2013
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  1. >It's Hearts and Hooves Day again!
  2. >You can't wait to finish making this card for the best teacher in the whole world, Ms. Cheerilee.
  3. >If only there were a nice stallion to give such a wonderful card to her. You really hope she has better luck this year...
  4. >Just have to wait for Scootaloo and Applebloom to get back from Anonymous's house.
  5. >Right on cue the two barge into the clubhouse with happy grins on their faces.
  6. >"Sweetie Belle, we're back!"
  7. Great! Did you get the glue?
  8. >"Even better, Mr. Anon gave us Krazy Glue! He says it drahs' Krazy Fast!"
  9. Then what are we waiting for, let's get to work!
  10. >Cutting out a giant heart from paper that is too large to feasibly exist, you randomly throw glue, glitter, paint, and ribbons on it.
  11. >Then you step on it a few times, for good measure.
  12. >When you're finished, the product is a giant, perfectly crafted heart card!
  13. We did it!
  14. >"Nice job, girls!"
  15. >"We really outdone ourselves this tahm!"
  16. >Excited at the thought of Ms. Cheerilees face when you give her this super duper card, you lean over and give Scootaloo a high-hoof.
  17. >"YEAH!"
  18. >...
  19. Uh-oh...
  20. >"Whut's wrong?"
  21. >"Our hooves are stuck!"
  22. >Watching us try to pull our hooves apart, Applebloom facehoofs.
  23. >...Then flips herself forward trying to remove said hoof from said face.
  24. >"...Ah think we need help..."
  25.  
  26. >Be miserable, lonely, pathetic Anon.
  27. >It's hearts and hooves day, and because you're the strange, gangly monkey, you are of course single.
  28. >To make matters worse, you saw 2 of those CMC Fillies earlier looking for some glue to make a card.
  29. >Being the nice beta guy you are, you loaned them some Krazy glue you had from back home.
  30. >Although they were quite thankful, the little hick one took a shot at you before they left.
  31. >"Wha' don't you have a very special somepony, Mr. Anon?"
  32. >At these words, you felt a frown form on your face.
  33. >As well as some strange lines on your forehead.
  34. Because...
  35. >Why didn't you have a very special somepony, Anon?
  36. >As you looked back down, you saw that they had already run off.
  37. >Wow, bitch material in the making.
  38. >So you took to strolling around town, watching all the happy pones make kissy faces at eachother, and humming dust in the wind.
  39. >While on your stroll, you are suddenly accosted by the same Fillies from before, plus the cute white one.
  40. >"Mr. Anon, we need help!"
  41. >"Yeah, this glue you gave us worked too well!"
  42. >You see that the redneck has her hoof attached to her forehead, and the other two have their hooves stuck together.
  43. >Gay.
  44. Well, what do you expect me to do about it?
  45. >You feel a bit bad for being mean, but you really don't want to deal with these youngins right now.
  46. >"Well, maybe we can figure out a way to get unstuck if we know what it's made of!"
  47. >The little white one chirps.
  48.  
  49. >...
  50. >Yeah, you're doing it.
  51. It's made of horse hide.
  52. >It's not, but they don't need to know that.
  53. >"Horse Hahd?"
  54. >"What's that?"
  55. Horse skin. Also, ground up horses hooves.
  56. >They keep their inquisitive looks for all of 5 seconds, before the color drains from their faces.
  57. >"H-h-hor-"
  58. Horse skin. And hooves. That was removed from a dead horse. That was killed by humans for the purpose of making glue.
  59. >Their eyes can't get much wider, but their pupils are pinpricks.
  60. >The hillbilly is the first to react.
  61. >"AAAAAAAH AH AH AAAAAAAH!"
  62. >She starts running in a circle, violently trying to tear her hoof from her forhead.
  63. >Soon the other two join in.
  64. >"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!"
  65. >"AAAAAAHHHHHH AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!"
  66. >As you watch on in guilty amusement, the white and orange ones accidentally clothesline the yellow one.
  67. >She hits the ground with a thud after a satisfying backflip, knocked the fuck out.
  68. >As the two conscious fillies continue to run around screaming, you're approached by a purple mare with flowers on her flanks.
  69. >"And just what is going on here?"
  70. >Standing beside you, she looks on with a face of equal parts concern, amusement, and weariness.
  71. Nothing serious, just a little prank.
  72. >Looking down at her, you smile.
  73. I'm Anon.
  74. >She smiles back up at you.
  75. >"Cheerilee."
  76. >Maybe this day won't be so lonely after all.
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