Crippled in Equestria - Part 4

>You wake up after the first good night's sleep you've had in a while.
>Pain also pokes you up the leg.
>At least your anchor was still around.
>Taped onto Titan is a piece of pink paper.  It’s an invitation to your party this afternoon at Sugarcube Corner.
>THIS AFTERNOON, THIS AFTERNOON.
>How did Pinkie get in?
>You had guessed only unicorns could do that magic shit.
>Probably better not to ask too many questions.  You pull yourself up, trying to straighten your face from the pain.
>It sucked that all your vicodin was gone.  You could already feel withdrawal setting in.
>Cold turkey was a sonofabitch.
>After raiding Twilight's food supply, Spike informs you that she's gone out for errands.  He went back to cleaning up the disaster of books all over the place.
>This dude was definitely a slave.
>You chow down on the ultra-manly vegetarian meal and then stand up.  You had the better part of the day to kill.
>Your thoughts drift to that old building.
>You didn't want to touch it just yet, but being a slick businessman, you knew just what you needed in a small town like this to be successful: a reputation.
"Spike, are there any schools around here?  Places little ones gather?"
>"Yeah!  All the fillies in P0nyville go to the school just down the road!"
>He seemed happy to help.


>So that was your plan.  You weren't a pedophile, especially in this place, but kids were nothing if not blabbermouths.
>If you made a good impression with the kids around here, they'd spread that around faster than anything you could do on your own.
>You wander through P0nyville a bit, looking for the school and updating your mental map.  The leg pain was beginning to creep up on you.
>There it is.  Just in time.
>The school was towards the outskirts of P0nyville, so that the kids had a ton of room for a park to play in.  Made sense, horses liked to run around, p0nies probably did too.
>Your old friend Pain demanded a rest, though, so you sat on a nearby bench to consider your plan of attack.
>It was probably in poor taste to just barge into the schoolground and demand attention, after all.
>You shut your eyes and focus on your leg, going through the routine to banish it away.  It took a few minutes, and to people looking at you it just looked like you were taking a power nap.
>"Is he asleep?" a voice squeaks.  Higher than other p0nies.
>"What IS that?"
>"Applejack tol' me about a hyoo-man that came into town, maybe that's him!"
>Your eyes bolt open.  You hear some gasps as a few p0nies hide behind the nearby fence.
>They're tiny.  Must be what you're here for.
>Their huge eyes peek at you through the gaps in the fence.
>All right Titan, time to shine.
>You rise from the bench and shift your weight onto your cane, giving the little p0nies a warm smile.  You'd practiced the expression a thousand times before, even you couldn't tell it from a real smile.
"Hey there little p0nies, how do you do?"
>"He talks!"
>"Applejack was raight!  'e's big an' strong!"
"Anonymous, please," you tell them.  Word must have already spread as a few other fillies join the group.
>"Ah... ah-non-ee-moose?"
>They toy with the name a bit.
>"That's not like any name I've heard before!" a teeny gray one squeaks.  Somehow these young p0nies were even more adorable than the older ones.
>They still look intimidated, so you gingerly set yourself down on the grass.  They barely made it to your knees.  The group of maybe eight or so emerges from the other side of the fence.
"A pleasure to meet you.  What are your names?"  You lay the gentleman on nice and thick.
>"Apple Bloom!"
>"Sweetie Belle!"
>"I'm Scootaloo."
>The names fire off one after another, all mind-numbingly cutesy, leaving only two left.
>They look on you with disdain.  One of them sports a tiara, the other a pair of glasses.
>Looks like schoolyard royalty exists too.
"Feeling shy?"
>"Hrmph.  Diamond Tiara."
>"Silver Spoon."
>They walk away, chins held to the sky.  They have no time for a pleb like you.
>After scarcely one second of silence, you're bombarded with a million questions.
>A lot of it is about what humans are like, evidently somep0ny had let slip what you are.
>You paint a picture of humans who struggle to make friends with each other, but they overcome hardship in unique and inventive ways.
>You leave out the dredges and horrific shit.  The story leaves a bit of a bad taste in your mouth.
>"Do hyoo-mans have cutie marks?" Apple Bloom.  You guessed by the apple name, accent, and unique headwear that she was clearly related to Applejack.
"A what?"
>"You know, cutie marks!  They show everyp0ny what your unique talent is!" Sweetie Belle this time.  You also note that a few of these fillies don't have the tattoo on the flank.
>P0ny puberty?
"So the cutie mark is like... something other p0nies identify you by?"
>The group nods heartily.
>Cutie marks.  Right.  Insanity gives you good categorization at least.
>You also remember something.
"Some of us do."

>The group's eyes widen to impossible levels.
>"Do you have one?"
"Two."
>"TWO?"
>"How did ya git TWO cutie marks?" Apple Bloom asks.  There's a hint of suspicion in her voice.
>You peel your shirt off.  Tattoos were great sometimes.
>All the fillies try to push past each other to get a good look at your shoulders.  You had one on each.
"We volunteer."
>"Vola-what?"
"They don't just appear: humans don't get them like you p0nies do.  If we want one we have to get it put on."
>"Ah wish WE were like that."
"A lot of humans get really silly ones.  Sometimes they don't mean anything... I don't think those ones are worth having."
>They hang onto your every word.
"Some of them have meaning, though," you tell them.
>The hint was quivering and juicy.  Irresistible.
>It takes them a moment.
>"What do yours mean?"
"Well, this one," you point to your right shoulder.  The group crowds that side to look at it.  It was a sword, broken into three pieces.  "It shows that I'm not as I should be."
>You point to your leg, and gesture to Titan.
"I'm hurt, broken, permanently.  I'm not as sharp, strong, or as useful as I used to be."
>The broken sword sounded good at the time.  Your right arm was also the one you'd swing a sword with, and it went with your other tattoo...
"This one," you point again.  The group scrambles to your other side.  It's a shield, emblazoned with a pure white lily.  "Represents what I have left.  It guards me from further harm."
>It was cheesy, whatever.  Chicks dig tattoos.
>"What's the flower for?"  Scootaloo this time.
"It’s what I'm good at.  I sold flowers to other humans back home.  That particular one is my specialty."
>"Hey, isn't there ones like that in Canterlot?"
>"Oh yeah!  In the royal gardens!"
>You felt like you were about to shit a brick.
"Do they grow anywhere else?"
>The group thinks for a bit.
>And another moment.
>"Nope."
>"Ah think Cheerilee said they're hard to grow around these parts."
>You knew what that was like.  The damn things were a pain in the ass.
>You feel like a dozen horse shoes are about to erupt from your bowels.  Your best flower was regal in P0nyland.
>"Oh claaaass!" you hear a grown up voice.  A cerise p0ny emerges from the schoolhouse.  "Oh, hello there.  You must be Anonymous, who I've heard so much about!"
>You nod.
>"Cheerilee, he has TWO cutie marks!"
>"Oh?"
>And so you explain your 'cutie marks' to their teacher as well.  She seems fascinated.  You also see the trio of flowers on her flank, smiling brightly.
>Just in time for the death blow.
"I'm also thinking of continuing my business as a florist here in P0nyville."
>"That's delightful!  We've missed Rose a lot since she left for Canterlot, we could sure use you!"
>You nod and smile.  Your foot had gone clear past the door and you'd fallen straight in.


>You excused yourself from the schoolhouse politely, leaving the fillies to whatever they study.
>As you hobble back through P0nyville, you cannot believe your luck.
>If you could somehow convince the Princess to give you a sample to try and grow, you'd be rolling in cash.  People loved to have shit associated with important people, you figured p0nies to be the exact same.
>She raised the bloody sun, obviously this Celestia was important as fuck.
>Whatever.
>It was about noon now, so you introduced yourself to a few of the p0nies strolling around P0nyville, killing time until the party.
>Looking for something to do, you note a clock shop. You'd need one for your own shop, so you decide to take a look.
>The door tingles at your entrance.  Something feels weird here.
>You look at the clocks lining the walls: they're all set to the same time and tick in unison.
>Weird.
>"Is there anything I can help you with?" A male p0ny interrupts your musing.
"No..."
>No no no.
>It can't be.
>The haircut, the voice, the cutie mark.
>Your sanity nosedives.
"I'm just looking, doctor."
>He looks at you quizzically.
>You were onto him.
>You leave quickly before you feel like living in a soft room for the rest of your life.
>Despair sets into your mind.  This place was worse than cancer.
>You grit your teeth.  Pain again.  Your nose flares as you suck in a few breaths.
>You vicegrip your cane and make your way to Sugarcube Corner.  It was go time.


>"SURPRISE!"
>Your skin contains you as you try to evacuate it, and your leg whines and bitches in response.
>The party had started.
>"HeyAnonisn'tthisgreatIinvitedeveryp0nythatcouldmakeitsoyoucouldmakelotsoffriends!"
>The pinkness nearly knocks you on your ass.
"Hello Pinkie.  Great party."
>"I know, right!?"
>She shoots off to tend to... whatever it is she does, and you make your way over to get a drink.
>The purple punch tasted good, you also detected a hint of alcohol.  Your eyes shoot over to see Rainbow Dash whistling to herself off to the side.
>You're a bad p0ny.
>You take in two glasses and feel the pain subside a tiny bit.  Good enough.
>"So ah hear ya got two cutie marks."  Applejack interrupts your effort to dispel your pain.
"Well I wouldn't say--"
>"Humans have cutie marks?"
>"How do you have two?"
>You notice Apple Bloom smiling at you.  She had told everyone.
>"Let's see 'em sugar cube."
>She sounded almost flirty.
>What?
>Nigga, she an APPLE.
"All right, then."
>The party had barely started, and already the girls saw you with your shirt off.
>P0nyville was certainly full of surprises.