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- >Wake up to a wonderful sunrise.
- >Shit, Shower, Shave. The usual routine before Fluttershy comes bashing on your door.
- >Familiar knock on front door.
- It begins...
- >what a fucking surprise?
- >Wait, this is a fucking surprise. It's Derpy, the mail-mare.
- >'Hello Anony!'
- >You only allow her to call you that. You like her style.
- Hey Derpy. How's your day been?
- >'Not bad Anony. Here's your mail.'
- >Reaches into bag, passes you a few letters with her wing.
- >'Also, Fluttershy is in your bushes with these big round thingys on her hooves.'
- >Have a peek, see fluttershit dressed as a car.
- Fluttershy, My fetish isn't cars.
- >'Beep Beep?'
- Yes, I'm quite sure of it.
- >'Beep honk....'
- >she slowly walks home, still making engine sounds.
- >'She really tries.'
- Yeah. Wonder what would happen if I moved.
- >'Don't do that. I won't remember where you live.'
- >Derpy gives you a sad look.
- Derpy, I'm not going anywhere. Now, isn't there something missing from my mail?
- >she perks up, starts bouncing up and down.
- >'You remembered it, Anony!!'
- >Pulls out a muffin from the other bag on her back, and puts it in your hands.
- >She always brings you muffins to try, ever since you came to ponyville.
- >Take a bite.
- Mmm, Apple and cinnamon. You have to show me how you make them so good.
- >'Well how about you come to mine tonight. Dinky will love Anony around.'
- Of course, how about I cook us all dinner? and then you can show me your secret.
- >'Shhh....Its gotta be a secret.'
- >Gives you a wink.
- >Hang out with your Rainbro most of the day.
- >Training for the running of the leaves
- I'm gunna beat you this year Rainbro
- >'Not with that flabby ass of yours'
- We can't have pert flanks like yours RD
- >She tackles you from a cloud above.
- >Start wrestling on the ground.
- >she pins you to the ground, staring into your eyes.
- >Her wings are fully opened.
- Wings won't help you now.
- >throw her off, about to tackle her flank.
- >Notice where the sun is
- CRAP!! Rainbro, I gotta go. I am having dinner with a very special pony tonight, and still need to prepare it.
- >Notice her wings deflate.
- >'Oh....Alright Anon. I have to get home too.
- >she flies off like a Wonderbolt.
- >Such a good bro, worried about my training.
- >Knock on Derpy's door, Big wicker basket in hand
- >Greeted by little Dinky.
- >'ANONY!!!!'
- >Ok maybe 2 ponies can call me that.
- >Give the little filly a big hug.
- >Derpy walks out of the kitchen, covered in flour.
- >Greet her with a massive hug too.
- Both of you get cleaned up, and dinner Shall be done soon.
- >Warm up a beautiful Vege lasanga, serve with a daffodil greens salad.
- >Set table, serve with apple and raspberry cider, thanks to Berry Punch.
- >enjoy dinner with 2 very good pony friends.
- >Derpy puts a movie on for Dinky as I clean up.
- >'Thank you Anony. It's nice to see someone who cares about me.'
- Oh Derpy. Everypony in Ponyville loves you. Without your muffins, or mail delivering skills, we would be done for.
- >Derpy blushes.
- So, you gunna show me how to make your wonderful muffins?
- >Derpy shows you her secret ingredients and method.
- >Freshest produce and mixing things by hand slowly with a whisk to keep in the air.
- >'I wanted to give you this for being such a good friend Anony'
- >She pulls out of a safe hidden under her bench, a golden muffin that matches Derpy's eyes.
- >Eyes start to well up.
- Thank you Derpy. I love it.
- >She motions you to try it.
- >Eat it in a few mouthfuls.
- Oh god, its sooo sweet and buttery aaannn.....
- >Start to feel woozy.
- >don't rememeber even hitting the floor.
- >Wake up in the dark.
- >Try to get up. Can’t move arms or legs.
- HELP!!! IS ANYPONY THERE!?!?!
- >Door across the room opens. Somepony walks it. too dark to see.
- >door shuts and lights come on, blinding you.
- >’Shush. I don’t need you waking Dinky up.’
- >eyes finally adjust, see derpy looming over you.
- Derpy, what the hell is going on?
- >Notice something is different. Her eyes are straightened.
- >’Let me ask you this. Fluttershy always comes to your door everyday. Why is that?’
- She…She wants to find out what my fetish is.
- >Derpy smiled.
- >’Well what a coincidence. This here is MY fetish.’
- Bondage? Rape? Torment?
- >Her face bunched up
- >’How dare you insinuate I would degrade myself by having sex with you. No, I’m more complex.’
- >This wasn’t your Derpy Hooves. This was something bad.
- >She leans in close
- >’ I love depriving people of enjoyment. That’s why I’m going to kill you Anony.’
- Well that seems like a perfectly good feti--- AAAAWHHHHAAAAATTTT?!?
- >’Yes, By killing you, I deprive no less than 5 ponies they’re fun of having sex with you.’
- >She walks over to the bedside table and pulls out a large butchers knife.
- >’Any last words?’
- Umm… I’m sorry if I ever seemed like I thought you were slow. You were always kind to me.
- >Give her a final smile.
- >Bedroom door bursts open, reduced to splinters.
- FLUTTERSHY?
- >Derpy crash-tackles fluttershy out the door.
- >I hear the scuffle down the hall.
- >Hear hoof steps enter room, too afraid to look. Fucked either way.
- >’H…Hey anon. I was worried.'
- Fluttershy. Please just undo the straps, and let me go home.
- >'Of...Ofcourse anon.'
- >Fluttershy undoes the straps with her mouth, and I get up.
- >See she is covered in bruises and cuts.
- Come on, I'll walk you home.
- >Walk Fluttershy to her door.
- Thanks for saving me. How did you know where I was?
- >'Oh...Rainbow Dash told me.'
- Okay then...but I didn't tell RD where I was going. I just said I had dinner plans.
- >Fluttershy looks at the ground awkwardly.
- Fluttershy?!?
- >'I guess that...life saving isn't your fetish?'
- No fluttershy. And I'd appreciate you not getting Derpy in trouble.
- >'Okay Anon.'
- >Give her a hug goodnight. She did get hurt a bit.
- >Feel her touch your butt.
- >Finish hug, and go home.
- Fucking Fluttershy.
- >The next day, Knock at door.
- >Fluttershy has already come and gone (Seriously, I don't have a Bug fetish either)
- >It's Derpy again, she has been crying.
- >'I'm sorry anon...I just wanted to help Fluttershy.'
- It's okay Derpy. I don't blame you. Just don't get sucked into these things.
- >'Thank you Anon.'
- It's Anony to you. And you are scary when you need to be.
- >She gives you a big smile, and bounces off.
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