[99 - 1] I Feel Bad for ya Son

Special note:
This story has been discontinued due to a major flaw in this chapter that I didn't catch.
The entire story is being taken back to the drawing board to be re-written from the ground up.
End Note


[99 - 1]
I Feel Bad for ya Son

----------------------

"You're sure this is gonna work?"
>"Positive."
"That's exactly what you said the past five attempts."
>"But Anon, I've got a good feeling about this one!"
>Again, she'd said that about previous attempts, but whatever.
>She was your only chance to return home.
>After six months of being stuck in a land of pastel ponies, you were ready to see a woman again.
>Your hand was good company and all, but still.
"Alright, but if I get a rash like I did last time, I swear I'll find a way to give it to you."
>"Anon, if this doesn't work, I'll eat my hat."
"You don't have a hat Twilight."
>"Details."
>You grimaced, getting prepared for the next magical experiment she was about to unleash on you.
>Whenever she lowered her head and took aim at you, you couldn't shake the feeling that you were playing Russian roulette.
"Alright, shoot."
>She assumed the position, pointing her horn at your chest.
>Bracing yourself against the couch, you shut your eyes as her horn began to glow bright.
>There was a crack, followed by a warm sensation enveloping your body.
>After the warmth stopped, you cracked open your eyes, hoping to see some semblance of home.
>Much to your disappointment, you were still in Twilight's library.
>She seemed about the same as she did every other attempt: a bit dazed and tired.
"Welp, guess you're eating a hat then," you said, slumping back into the couch.
>Rather, you would've slumped, had something caught your attention.
>Something was off, and you couldn't quite put your finger on it...

----------------------

>Twilight shook her head, finally looking up at you with an expression you'd seen before.
>It was one of both shame and frustration, and it was becoming far too familiar for your tastes.
>The expression didn't last though, as it was soon replaced by what you could only describe as confusion.
>"Anon?"
"Yup, still here Twilight."
>There it was again.  Something was just... off.
>"How do you feel?  Do you feel okay?  Does anything hurt?"
"Uuuhhh... No?" you said, shrugging your shoulders.  "Why?"
>"You don't," she started, only to stop mid-sentence.  "You look," she said, stopping herself once more.
"Spit it out already, Twilight.  How bad am I?"
>"I... Don't know," she said, putting a hoof to her chin.
>"You look different, but... not."
"Twilight, that's incredibly not helpful."
>Seeing as you weren't going to get any help from the discombobulated purple pony, you decided to stand up and take a little personal inventory.
>First things first, you grabbed your crotch to check for your precious.
"Twilight," you said, your hand still on your crotch.  "Where's my dick?"
>When she didn't answer, you ran to the kitchen.
>You could feel a new weight on your chest, but you didn't really care to investigate right now.
>Besides, a nagging voice at the back of your mind told you that you already knew what the new weight was.
>Choosing to remain hopeful, you quickly began rummaging through Twilight's kitchen in search of something shiny.
>Finding a somewhat shiny spoon, you slowly brought it to your face.

----------------------

>Still in shock, you raised a hand to your face just to check.
>Dropping the spoon, you brought your hand a bit lower down for the final test.
>Feeling a protrusion where there shouldn't be one, you took your other hand and placed it on your right pec.
>Or rather, your right breast.
"TWILIGHT, WHAT DID YOU DO?!"
>"What is it?  What's wrong?!" she said, sprinting into the kitchen.
>Her failed attempt to stop led her to collide with the cabinet.
>You didn't care though, she'd... violated you.
>Walking over to the dazed unicorn, you picked her up under her forelegs, hoisting her to eye level.
"WHERE IS MY DICK?"
>"Whazzat?" she mumbled, still slightly shaken by the previous impact.
"MY DICK TWILIGHT."
>"Anon, I don't know what you're tal-"
"YOU TURNED ME INTO A WOMAN, TWILIGHT."
>"I did what?" she said, confusion settling in.
"Look at this!" you said, dropping her to grab your breasts.
"Tits!  I've got TITS, Twilight!"
>"What do you mean 'tits'?"
"Tits.  Boobs.  Fun bags.  Breasts," you said, pointing at your new chest.
"That's not normal!  I'M SUPPOSED TO HAVE A DICK, NOT TITS!"
>Twilight stared at your chest for a while, letting everything you'd said sink in.
>"So... You're a girl now?"
"Yes!" you said, throwing your arms to your sides.
>"This is what a female human looks like?" she asked, getting to her hooves.
>Sighing in frustration, you realized you weren't going to get much help out of her until her curiosity was sated.
"Yeah.  Listen, I'll tell you all you want to know about human females, as soon as you turn me back into a dude, deal?"

----------------------

>"But Anon, why would I question you when I could just examine you?  It won't take long, I promise!"
"No!  Change me back, dammit!"
>"Anon, please!  Think of the opportunities we have to-"
"The opportunities -you- have, you mean," you said, irritation obvious.
>"Oh come on Anonymous, haven't you ever wondered what it's like to be a member of the opposite sex?"
"No, I haven't!"
>"Just a few quick notes?"
"Twilight, I swear if-"
>"Pleeeease?"
"...God dammit Twilight."
>"I'll only be a minute, I promise!" she said, teleporting to her room upstairs.
>You grudgingly made your way over to a chair at the kitchen table, plopping down.
"This is NOT what I had in mind about seeing a woman, dammit," you muttered to yourself.
>Your shirt was too tight now, your pants felt loose, and your voice unfamiliar.
>Your thoughts were interrupted by someone else's voice though.
>"Gah!  What the heck is that!?"
>Without even looking away from the spot you were boring into the table with your eyes, you knew who it was.
"Hey Spike."
>"...Anon?  Is that you?"
>You forced a grin, finally looking to the purple dragon.
"Yeah."
>Squinting, he slowly approached you.
>"What the hay happened to you?"
"Twilight happened."
>"Whaddya mean?"
"Long story."
>"But I just saw you ten minutes ago, you looked fine!  Did something sting you?" he asked, pointing to your chest.
"No," you replied bluntly, covering your new assets with your arms.  "Where is purple smart anyways?"
>"She's-"
>"Right here!" she said, popping back into existence.

----------------------

>"I just needed to gather a few things," she said, setting down her equipment.
>You felt your jaw drop as you took in everything she'd just plonked down in front of you.
"Twilight, you're not going to examine me with all that garbage, and I'm sure as hell not putting on that helmet again."
>"But Anon, you might ha-"
"I swear sometimes my ears will just ring for no reason after I put that stupid thing on.  No, it's not happening."
>"Anon, you promised!"
"I did no such thing!  You said you'd found another spell that might send me home, and instead it swapped my dick for a pair of tits."
>"I'm sorry Anon, I still don't know what caused that-"
"Then why don't you look into that before you start going gaga over me, AGAIN?"
>"But Anon, we might not have a chance like this again!"
"You know what?" you said, rising from your seat.  "I'm getting out of here.  I'm not going to play lab experiment to you again."
>"Anon, wait!  Where are you going?!"
"Anywhere but here," you said, not slowing down to explain.  "Come get me when you find a way to fix me."
>With that, you were out the door.  Twilight had tried to reason with you once more, but you ignored her.
>If you were going through her hell of examining you again, it would be on your own terms.
"Of ALL the problems I've got, I don't need THAT again," you said to yourself.
>As you trudged along, going nowhere in particular, you ignored the stares you got this time around.
>You didn't give a damn as to what anyone else was thinking right now.
>
>Unless it was about your breasts.

----------------------

>Feeling your cheeks flush, you folded your arms over your chest.
>It was just as likely the ponies knew nothing of human breasts to know what they were, but that didn't stop their gazes from bothering you.
>Now needing somewhere to duck into, you spotted a somewhat familiar building not but a block away.
"Sugarcube Corner," you mumbled.  "Well, it's better than Twilight's library."
>Taking up a faster pace, you eventually found yourself sitting down at a table by yourself.
>For whatever reason, there wasn't anyone else in the bakery.
>Shrugging it off to whatever, you slumped back into your chair, arms falling to your sides.
>"Hiya!  Who're you?!"
"GAH!"
>You toppled over, falling out of your chair.
>No matter how many times she did that, you'd never get used to Pinkie's... habits.
"Hi Pinkie," you said, your voice muffled by the face full of floor.
>"Nooonny?  Is that yooou?" she said, giggling to herself.
"Yes Pinkie, it's me," you said, climbing back into the chair.
>"You look different," she said, hopping into the chair across from you.
>Squinting, she rested her head on a hoof and eyeballed you.
>"Did you do something to your hair?"
>Without really thinking about it, your hand immediately went to your scalp.
"Not on purpose," you said, taking note of your shoulder length hair for the first time.
>It was a bit messy, sure, but it was much longer than what you'd had beforehand.
>"Are you wearing a new outfit?  Did you get a new hat?  Oooh, a new soap?!"
"Pinkie, I'm a girl."
>"Really?" she said, grinning from ear to ear.

----------------------

"Yes, really," you said, pointing at your chest.
>Of course, you weren't taking into account that she'd probably never seen a human female before.
>"Ooooh, did something bite you?  You should probably go see Twilight, I bet she-"
"NO!" you said, irritation returning.  "No.  She's the reason I'm in this whole mess."
>"Did Twilight bite you?  That's weird; she's never bitten me before.  Now that I think about it, she's never bitten any-"
"She didn't bite me Pinkie, these are boobs."
>"Boobs?"
"Boobs.  Boobies.  Tits.  Fun bags. Br-, aww fuck it," you said, returning to your slump.
>"Boobies," she said, walking around the table to get a better look at your chest.
>"Boo bees," she repeated, poking one with a hoof.
"Hey!"
>"That's so COOL Nonny!  Do all girls have boo bees?  Do they have stingers?  Can you sting somepony now?!  I bet you're like a super hero!"
"Pinkie, calm down."
>"You need a costume!  And a superhero name!  You could be Nonny, the boo bee master!  How do your stingers work?" she asked, poking your breast again.
>Noticing your now hard nipples, you covered your chest once more.
"Pinkie!  Stop touching my tits!"
>"Tits?  I thought you said they were boo bees?"
"I want to hate you.  Really really badly."
>"But Anon," she said, slithering up between your breasts and arms to smile at you.  "Boo bees!"
"Dammit Pinkie."
>"Why do you want to hate me, Nonny?" she asked, still grinning.
>Grimacing, you turned away from her gaze.
"I don't want to hate you Pinkie, I'm just not in the mood."

----------------------

>"Not in the mood?" she repeated.
"That's right Pinkie.  Not in the mood," you said, sulking further into the chair.
>"Nooony"
"Pinkie, I just want a snack or something.  Please?"
>"Oooooh!  That's a great idea!"
>As the being from another realm zipped off into the warzone that she claimed a kitchen, you reveled in the silence.
>Six months.  Six fucking months you'd been here.
>Every failed attempt to send you home worsened your mood, sure, but this...
>This was too far.  She'd fucked up and she wasn't even going to try and fix it!
>Every time she 'examined' you, it was the same excuse. 'I need to see why the magic didn't work' or 'You might be reacting and we just can't see it yet'
>Well, she finally got a reaction.  Fucking unicorn.
>Of all the ponies in Ponyville, she had to be the only unicorn capable of sending you home.
>She was too engrossed in her research to really focus on trying to help you out.
>"Here you go Nonny!"
>After calming down, you did your best to remain upset and scowling whilst eating the muffin Pinkie had given you.
>"Soooo," she said, scooting close to you.
>"Whatcha thinkin' bout?"
>Surely she can't be this dense.  She's just playing stupid or something.
"Stuff."
>"What kiiind of stuff?" she asked, slithering up your side.
"Like how awful this muffin is."
>To your annoyance, she didn't gasp in terror like you were hoping.
>"You're not a good liar, Nonny."
"What makes you think I'm not telling the truth?"
>"Cause you finished the muffin."
>
>
>
"Dammit Pinkie."
>"What's the matter, Nonny?"

----------------------

"Seriously?  You can't tell?" you said, leaning back to try and make your condition more obvious.
>Pinkie squinted at you, hoof to her chin in thought.
>"Aren't your boo bees supposed to have a stinger?" she said, reaching for one of your breasts.
"Dammit woman!" you said, pushing the hoof away.
"I'm a girl!  That's what's wrong!"
>She sat there, giving you a rather blank stare.
>"I don't get it."
"I was a guy when I got here, Pinkie.  Now I'm not.  Get it now?"
>"Hmmmm... Nope.  I got nothin," she said, shrugging.
"Seriously?!  I don't want to be a girl, Pinkie!"
>"Why not?"
"Because it's not who I am, and I never asked for this to happen!"
>You were sitting upright, your face now eye level with Pinkie's since she'd sat upright.
>Realizing you were panting in frustration and anger, you leaned back in your chair, crossing your arms once more.
>"What's wrong with being a girl?"
"It changes everything!"
>"Like what?"
"I can't... I can't do things like I would when I was a guy!"
>"Why not?"
"Well," you said, realizing your own rather weak argument.
"I can't use the men's bathroom anymore!"
>"Neither can I!"
"I'll have to wear stupid shit like dresses and bras!"
>"Why?"
"Because," you said, frustration rising.
>"I don't even wear pants, Nonny," she said, giggling.
"...I really want to hate you right now."
>"It's not so bad being a girl Nonny, I promise."
>You slumped back in your chair, defeated.
>She was right.  Maybe on Earth your argument would've held some semblance of relevance, but here it was nil.
>"Ooooh!  Now Rarity can do your hair!"

----------------------

>You remained silent, lamenting on the points she'd made.
>Maybe it's not so bad being a girl here...
>You're the only one of your species; you don't have some code to abide by.
>You could technically run around nude and the ponies wouldn't think twice about it.
>Didn't change the fact that your gender was part of your fucking identity.
>The fact that your body could be manipulated like that was a little... unnerving, to say the least.
>Not to mention that if you did somehow manage to get back home now, no-one would recognize you.
>If they did, they'd probably not want anything to do with you.
>But it would be home.
>As this thought set in, Pinkie started poking you in the side.
"Hey!" you said, jolting back to reality.
>"You sure you're okay Nonny?  You kinda... stopped," she said, stifling a giggle.
"I'm still pissed at Twilight is all, Pinkie.  Nothing to worry about."
>"Nothing to worry about?!" she repeated, jumping to your lap.
>Her face now severely violating your personal space, she continued.
"Pinkie, please.  It's her fault I'm in this whole mess anyways."
>"Whaaat?!" she said, rearing back in shock.
"She fucked up the spell that did this.  Now she won't take the time to try and fix me.  Instead, she's more interested in research and notes.  Like usual."
>"Anon, as your expert on aaaall things Twilight, I think you should go and talk to her."
"Ha!  Fat chance.  I'm not speaking to Twilight until she's figured out how to change me back."
>"Nonny, friends shouldn't-"
"She is NOT my friend, Pinkie.  She's done nothing but examine me and use me as her test subject for spells that may or may not wisp me off to who knows where."

----------------------

>"What?  But Anon, she's only trying to send you home.  That's what you want, isn't it?"
"Yeah, but she's being an ass about it.  This," you said, clutching your breasts for emphasis.
"This is too much.  She crossed a line."
>"I know Twilight, Nonny.  She wouldn't be doing what she's doing if it wasn't for a good cause!"
"Oh, I'm sure it is for a good cause.  In a museum or some shit."
>"But Anon-"
"Pinkie, she's looked at me as nothing more than a science experiment or something to study since I arrived."
>"That's not true!"
"Oh yeah?  When she's not studying me, she never leaves her library.  I spend more time with you than her.  Hell, you probably know more about me than she does at this point."
>"She's only doing it for you Nonny!  I'd bet all my cupcakes on it!"
>Of course, you hadn't realized that you'd issued a challenge to Pinkie.
>There was no going back now.
>
>
>
>You don't know how Pinkie... did.
>She just did.
>That fact alone was what was keeping you rooted to your spot outside of Twilight's library.
>Pinkie was inside talking to Twilight, but just because she was distracted didn't mean she couldn't find you.
>That mare was... not a pony.  Simple as that.
>As you shuddered at the thought of her being angry with someone, she popped open the door to the library.
>"C'mon Nonny!"
>Choosing to save her the few seconds it would take to drag you in, you willingly entered the building.
>Tree.
>
>Whatever.
>Your mind threw such petty debate topics to the side once you saw Twilight with her head down.

----------------------

>Sitting down on the floor, you folded your arms over your chest waiting on Pinkie to begin.
>It was unavoidable, really.  You could feel it in the air.  Pinkie was going to be the leader of this little chat.
>She was going to drag it out of both you and Twilight to get-
>"So."
>Well fuck you sideways.  Purple smart started talking before Pinkie did.
>Pinkie was standing where she could see both of you, but you only barely registered she was there.
"So."
>"I," Twilight started to say, apparently struggling to find her words.
>"I wanted to say I'm sorry."
>Both you and Pinkie were silent.  It was surprising that Pinkie had convinced this stuck up unicorn to say anything at all.
>"I messed up with the spell, big time.  I didn-"
"Messed up?" you scoffed.  "You did this on purpose."
>"What?  Anonymous, I would never-"
"Are you kidding me Twilight?  You're going to sit there and lie to my fucking face?"
>"I'm not lying!  I messed up the sp-"
"Really?  You were a bit too eager to take notes on what'd happened for my taste."
>"I have to take notes, its how I fix problems like this!" Twilight stressed.
"Oh?  The allure of checking out the other gender of an alien race wasn't too much for you then?"
>"Well I-"
"I knew it!  You're more interested in examining me and dissecting me than sending me home!  You'd like nothing more than to slice me open and find out what makes me tick!"
>"That's not true!  I've been researching-"
"Researching!  How do I know you didn't plan all this?  Hell, you might even be the reason I'm here in the first place," you stormed.

----------------------

>"Anonymous!  I would never harm another creature for scientific advancements!"
"That's just it though!  I'm just a creature to you, not a person.  I am beneath you in your holier than thou opinion."
>"If you would just-"
"What, accept that I'm just supposed to be a girl now?  Twilight, do you have ANY idea what I'm going through right now?"
>"No, I don't," she said solemnly.  "I can't even begin to imagine what you're going through.  And I'll stay that way unless you let me-"
"No!  No more examinations, no more studies, and no more bullshit!" you protested.
>Pinkie was utterly devastated.  She'd been quiet out of shock for the better part of a minute now.  Some kind of record, surely.
>"What do you want from me?!" Twilight yelled.  "You won't let me do anything to help you!"
"Two things Twilight.  I want my dick back, and I want to go home.  In that order," you growled.
"Now, unless you're going to do one of those things, I'm leaving.  I've had enough of you for today."
>The silence strained on your ears.  It felt good to let it all out.
>She was the one who fucked you up, and she wasn't even going to consider helping you until she'd dissected every part of your being, again.
>Your footsteps broke the silence like gunshots as you made your way out of that wretched building.
>Seeing as you'd been more or less forced by circumstance into staying with Twilight, you now had to find a new place to stay.
>For the time being, you headed off towards Sugarcube Corner to think for a bit.
>That building had been the site of many an important decision in your time here; tonight would be no different.

----------------------

>As the evening sun cast a warming glow across Ponyville, you quietly made your way into Sugarcube Corner.
>Pinkie hadn't followed you, not that you'd really expected her to.
>While you hadn't been here all that long, you considered the pink party pony a friend.
>But you weren't going to make her choose between a new friend and Twilight.
>Regardless of your opinion of her, she was still Pinkie's friend just as much as you were.
>Though the cakes were running the bakery, you didn't order anything.  You weren't here for food, you were here to think.
>Maybe you'd be lucky and this would all be some kind of dream.
>Or nightmare.  You weren't too sure which.
>As you sat with your head upon on your hands, thoughts raced around your disarrayed mind like fireworks.
>Maybe you'd be lucky and this really was all a dream.
>What if it wasn't?
>What if you were doomed to be a girl?
>How would that change you?
>Looking down, you realized how much you'd already been changed.
>You now had breasts; a thinner midsection; hell, even your hair had grown and changed a bit.
>Your shirt was too tight and your pants too loose.
>Without really caring about where you were, you reached down to check for your dick like you would a beverage in a refrigerator.
>No matter how often you checked, it still wasn't there.
>Exploring a bit, you poked at the void where your beloved soldier should've been.
>Gasping a bit at the sensation, you decided that it would be best to explore your body later.
>The thought occurred to you that you would have to take care of your body differently.

----------------------

>You'd have to sit down to piss now.
>You'll need a bra sometime soon, or your new assets were going to bruise or some shit.
>
>
>
>But you're not getting panties.  Fuck that shit.  There's a line, dammit.
>The blood rushing from your face signaled that something grievous had happened.
>And indeed something had happened.  You'd just realized you would have to maintenance your body.
>You were going to have a period if you didn't change back soon.
>
>
>
>Sitting there, you let that thought sink in for a moment.
>A period.
>
>
>Fuck.
>
>
>Shuddering, you pushed the thought to the back of your mind for the time being.
>It will haunt your dreams certainly, but that was for another time.
>While it'd been one hell of a day to say the least, you'd just walked out on the person that'd been putting you up.
>Thinking about it though, you'd rather sleep on the ground than put up with her again.
>The way she treated you, the way she'd acted, it'd all rubbed you the wrong way.
>Not to mention the whole swapping your gender thing.
>The further away from her you were, the less likely you'd wind up as who knows what.
>Matter of fact, it would probably be better for your physical health if you just gave up on going home.
>Your mental health though... Bah, thoughts for another time.
>Right now you wanted nothing more than to take a nap and hopefully wake up from this wretched dream.
>In your somewhat tired state, you slumped back in your chair.
>Looking down, you found the lumps that were your breasts.
>No.  Boobs.  Boo bees.

----------------------

>You took each on delicately in each hand, pressing them together.
"Boo bees," you giggled to yourself.
>Realizing you were playing with yourself, you folded your arms over your chest again.
>It really has been one hell of a day.  At least nobody saw you.
>
>Or so you thought.
>
>As the feeling that someone was watching you overcame, you began to glance back behind you from time to time.
>It wasn't long before you were growing weary of actually caring.
>The evening sun casting the light the way it was, you'd just registered a shadow moving across your table.
>Before you had time to react, two hooves came down on either side of you, each landing on a breast.
>"Boo bees!"
"Dammit woman!" you yelped, pinned to the back of the chair by her grip.
>Pinkie laughed at your squirming, the sound infecting you as well.
>Soon you were laughing with her.  The bewilderment and exhaustion setting in, you and Pinkie continued to laugh for a while longer.
>Grabbing a hoof, you pulled her around to hug.
>Maybe things wouldn't be so bad after all.