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- [SO HEADSHOT TOLD ZARKANORF ABOUT THIS GIRL HE LIKES AND SHOWS ZARK PICS]
- Zarkanorf says
- • ...
- • Damn it, man; don't make me come over there and steal her Bowser-style.
- HeadShot XL says
- • I dare you
- Zarkanorf says
- • brb plotting with minions
- HeadShot XL says
- • kk
- Zarkanorf says
- • okay, so we've got a rough draft
- • Pretty much, we're going to take every single Mario game ever that involved kidnapping and wrap it all into one plan
- HeadShot XL says
- • Okay
- • I await that
- Zarkanorf says
- • So first I'm gonna need you to put on this bucket while I spawn nine children, make a huge fleet of warships from both the air and sea, conquer this galaxy
- • Then I'm going to get the mirror image of you if you were fat and greedy to take over your hometown thrice over, morphing it into his own image and shit
- • while stealing your treasures
- • and controlling you while you got that bucket on your head
- • MEANWHILE, I'mma gonna cover the world in delicious evil paint and sludge while capturing all of the stars and the Star Rod and every fucking else that gives omnipotent powers
- • and then get one of my sons to both wear a bandana while being you in evil-paint-form
- • and the other eight siblings I'm going to forget about for ten years before stuffing them in...
- • wait, lemme count. one, two...
- • four castles, each.
- • while I WILL FORCE YOU TO GO THROUGH
- • IN A LINEAR-BUT-SOMETIMES-NOT-REALLY PATH
- • BEFORE YOU GET TO THE MOON ZONE
- • which then
- • I will have conquered the galaxy by then and force you to traverse a shit-load of planets and astroids and shit
- • which then leads you to my AWESOME PLANET MADE OF LAVA, MOTHERFUCKER, CUZ THAT'S HOW DOPE PIMP I AM
- • AND THEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN you'll fight me
- • but it won't be me
- • it'll be a robotic version of my
- • me**
- • controlled by four obnoxious, turtle power-ranger rip-offs
- • AND THEEEEEEEEEEEEEN they'll tell you that I'm in another galaxy (which I would've conquered by then)
- • AND THEN YOU WOULD HAVE TO TRAVERSE THROUGH SEVEN MORE HUGE GALAXIES BEFORE YOU REACH THE LAST ONE
- • which is pretty much hell in space
- • LIKE LOTS OF HELL
- • FIRE AND LAVA AND FIRE AND WARSHIPS AND FIRE AND FIRE AND STARS AND FIRE
- • IN SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE
- • and if you somehow magically pass that
- • you'll face me
- • on a bridge
- • with bombs around it
- • and you'll have to take an axe, hit me on my backside, swing me around with the axe still in me, and then throw me into bombs
- • and you'll have to do that three times
- HeadShot XL says
- • I get the picture
- Zarkanorf says
- • WHY DID YOU LET ME TYPE SO MUCH BEFORE INTERRUPTING
- • I was having trouble remembering all the games at once. XD
- • and now my fingers hurt. :c
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