Royal Pains

>Day why was this considered 'news' in Equestria
>Be Anon
>Be five in the goddamn morning
>Who can it be knocking at your door?
>Go away. Don't come round here no more
>"Anon! Could you come out here! I need to talk to you about something!"
>Goddamnit. She ruined the song!
>Reluctantly, you leave your bed for now and investigate the commotion
>You stumble, grumble, mumble and do other things that rhyme as you make your way to your front door
>You open it to a bouncing, cheery and bright Twilight Sparkle
>Fucking bitch
>"Hi Anon!"
"What do you want foul creature"
>Twilight giggles at your insult, thinking it was a joke or a friendly remark, "Well, Mr. Anon, I'm just here to see if you've been reading up on the latest new stories."
>Ha
>Equestrian news is complete bullshit. It's always something boring like some new breed of corn being made, a foal's lost hamster being reunited with him, evil corn killing ponies, and celebrity news.
"Sorry Twi, can't say that I've kept track."
>"Well that's okay, I can explain it for you." She clears her throat and inhales deeply before continuing
>Brace for impact

1/20
>"You see, my brother fell in love with my foalsitter, and they got married a while ago. There was a problem at their wedding, but their love for each other overcame it and now it's stronger than ever. Because of this, the two decided to--"
>Initiating door shut technique 294
>Door has successfully been shut
>Well that was fun. You suppose that it's time for breakfast, seeing as you probably aren't going to be able to fall back asleep again
>As you turn around to go to your kitchen, you are stopped by a wild Twilight Sparkle who has teleported into your house and continued her lecture without stopping
>"and after that, it was only a matter of time before the news would get out about the baby, which is why I came to you today, Anon."
>Oh boy, this better to be good
>Twilight grins, "We're going to the Crystal Empire to see the royal baby be born live!"
>Woah
>You get to witness a royal birth in the flesh
>That's sounds like a pretty noble honor
"Nope" You make your way past Twilight and into your kitchen
>"I must have neglected to mention that this wasn't a 'choice' thing." She said charging a spell
>The last thing you remember was the soul crushing agony of not being able to eat your Wheaties for breakfast this morning

2/20

>…
>You awake to find yourself on a train with the other mane six on board
>Fluttershy is curled up closer than you thought possible with you. It's like she's trying to worm her way into your shirt
>The other p0nies don't seem to notice her public display of affection
>"So Anon." Fluttershy says, nuzzling your face, "I noticed that you, um, talk in your sleep. You kept muttering, "Fluttershy, do me right now…please"
>What
>"You know Anon, as a professional, I think that maybe you should listen to your subconscious and see what it wants you to do"
"I don't talk in my sleep, you deranged weirdo"
>"Are psychologists your fetish?"
"No you creepy horse" You stand up from your seat to brush yourself off, causing the yellow pegasus to fall off of you
>The other p0nies welcome you with bright smiles and excited faces
>You hate them all so very, very much
>Judas Sparkle comes to your booth and sits across from you, "Sorry about that, but I was in a hurry and since you didn't immediately say yes, I had no other choice."
"Why didn't you just leave me the fuck alone?" You ask plainly
>She raises an eyebrow at you, "Well, don't you want to see the royal birth with your friends, Anon?" She asks, smiling softly
>Goddamn these wonderful fucking p0nies

3/20

>All you wanted to do today was relax and do fuck all
>Maybe a little bit of yardwork, but that would be about it
>Now, you're stuck on a train heading to the Crystal Empire to watch a p0ny who you have no interest in perform one of the most beautiful and horrifying acts any being can perform
>And Fluttershy is in your mouth
>…
>Kay
>You swat her away with a shove to the face
>"Oh, um, are, uh, are orthodontists your fetish?
"You do that again, and I'll break your arms off for touching me"
>"Is that your fe--"
"No"
>The train ride from that point on is fairly uneventful. The mane six chat amongst themselves about how excited each of them are to be able to see the miracle of life to occur right before their eyes
>You swore an unholy curse upon all those in the train that since your slumber was ruined for this trip, their trip would be ruined for slumber
>You knew reading those dark tomes in Twilight's library was a good idea
>As you recite the horrific black curse, Fluttershy scoots ever so closer to you
>"So, Anon. Doesn't all this about foals make you want to have some of your own?"
"Biology won't let us sister. Give up while you can."
>"N-Nonsense! We could, um, you know, adopt a foal and raise it together! Just like…like we were husband and wife? Where we would still attempt to procreate, knowing full well that, um, no matter how many times we would slam into each other's bodies, we would never produce offspring of our own, but, um, our love would be so strong for each other that we wouldn't care that no matter how hard and how often we tried--"
>You have to give her some credit, she does have her priorities straight. But this creepy fantasy rant has lost your attention and you begin to gaze out of the window
>The green hills of the Crystal Empire roll along across the prairie near the railroad tracks. It's weird to think that for a thousand years this was nothing more than a frozen wasteland. Guess life can pretty much start anywhere
>Now would be a good time to catch up on your lost sleep
>You slowly shut your eyes and slowly drift off; Fluttershy's sexual rambling providing a decent enough white noise

4/20

>…
>The screeching of wheels awakens you from your nap. A quick glance outside reveals that you have arrived at the train station
>While yawning, you expect the cabin to find that the girls have all moved towards the exit, save for Fluttershy who is still imagining the same bizarre sexual possibilities with you from earlier
>Weird fucking horse
>You get up and start for the exit, Fluttershy following close behind. The two of you are now on the platform
>"Oh! Um, Anon, did you, uh, did you know that a Crystal Empire tradition is to give a pretty mare a kiss when you arrive?" Fluttershy asks, floating -right- in front of your face
You decide to tease the yellow pegasus, "Guess I'll see if Dash will do the deed then"
>"NO!" Cries Fluttershy, eyes suddenly the size of saucers, "I mean, um, why don't you leave her alone, sweetie? I'm sure that someone as boyish and non-wife material like Rainbow Dash wouldn't appreciate it like I would"
"Whatever" You mumble, pushing the mare out of your face
>You catch up to the main group and walk with them towards the hospital.

5/20

>Twilight gives some background to the whole situation, "Now, I'm sure you all know how important a royal birth is, but since it's the first one in a millennium for the crystal p0nies, that makes it even more special!"
>You begin to wonder if they have any bars in the Crystal Empire
>"The new foal will one day become the ruler of the kingdom, so everyp0ny is super excited for his or her arrival!"
>Granted, there wasn't a single bar in Equestria, you remain optimistic that these crystal p0nies won't let you down
>"The best doctor around was called in for the birth, so Cadence and my brother aren't worried at all. I'm sure they're even more excited than everyp0ny else though! Cadence always talked about how she wanted a family of her own when she foalsat me, and I'm sure my brother feels the same way."
>Oh shit what was that? Twimlit Sprinkle said something about her brother, right?
>Oh hell yeah
>That guy's alright in your book
>You recall the first time you met him
>You were in Canterlot for some Princess bullshit reporting thing which consisted of you meeting Celestia and swearing that you'll learn about friendship or some shit
>At least she had free food. Most of which were cakes, but hey, you don't mind getting fat
>Anyway, you were walking around downtown Canterlot, when a group of fine unicorns with a pegasus came to you and asked how humans reproduce
>Street smarts taught you better
>You bounced the fuck up out of there, but were caught soon enough
>Horses yo, can't compete; don't bother

6/20

>You were thrown into an alleyway, where your clothes were torn and you were straddled by the leader of this rape gang
>All hope seemed lost, when suddenly the rapist was thrown off you by some sort of magic projectile
>It looked cool as hell, but you were too busy crying from the almost rape to fully appreciate it
>The group dispersed and you were helped to your feet by none other than the captain himself, sir Shining Armor
>He said he remembered Twilight mentioning you in a letter home, so when he saw you walking alone he went to investigate, just in time to see you get assaulted
>As he helped you retrieve your clothes, the ring leader of the group must have recovered from the attack and lunged at Shining Armor
>She knocked the white stallion out, giving him two or three solid punches to the head before you jumped on her and slammed her into the pavement
>As you pulled your fist back to punch, your rapist looked up at you with teal eyes and smiled, "Is reverse gang rape your fetish, Anon?"
>Fucking Fluttershy
>Well anyway, she escaped and you ended up carrying Shining Armor back to the castle and stuck around to make sure he was alright
>You two became friends after that and swore to have each other's back from then on
>Back in the present, you decide that if he's the father of this child then you suppose this won't be a complete waste of time
>Soon enough, the group reaches the hospital and proceed inside
>It looks just like a normal hospital back on earth
>No crazy, glowing, magical healing vortex spire in the center of the building, giving off energy to dying p0nies in order to sustain their lives long enough for a doctor to perform on them
>Nope
>None of that here. Just a regular, normal hospital
>Neat

7/20

>After getting information from the front desk, you and the six ponies make you way to Princess Cadence's operating room
>On the way there, however, you pass by a few other operating rooms. One of which has a surgery taking place
>You think nothing of it until you hear the staff freaking out, "Hey! What the heck do you think you're doing!"
>You peak into the room from the door and witness Fluttershy grab a scalpel and stab the poor p0ny on the operating table
>Oh god what the actual fuck
>She looks back at you, "Are surgeons your fetish, Anon?"
>Sweet baby ray no
"You just killed that p0ny! What the hell did you do that for?!"
>She looks between you and the now severely bleeding p0ny, "Is…is that a no?"
>The medical staff is scrambling around the room, grabbing utensils and tools to use to save this p0ny's life
>Fluttershy, accepting defeat, hangs her head in disappointment, "Darn. I just know you'll like somep0ny with a job Anon. It just -has- to work!"
>She tosses the scalpel behind her, stabbing the p0ny on the operating table again. Suddenly, the medical staff freezes and there is a silence in the room
>"Oh. Yeah, that fixed it, I guess. Stitch him up and send him home. Thank you, miss!" calls one of the doctors
>Well shit
>Nice job Fluttershy
>You both continue on your way

8/20

>"Twily!" Shouted Shining Armor as the group entered the room
>"BBBFF!" Replied the purple unicorn, running up to her brother and hugging him.
>"Hello everp0ny. It's wonderful to see you all here." Said a swollen Cadence on the bed in the middle of the room
>The girls walk over to her with wonder in each of they're eyes. They exchange greetings and compliments and talk amongst themselves for a little bit
>You're having none of it
>As a man, you have a manly duty to adhere to
>You walk over to Shining Armor and give him a pat on the shoulder
"Nice work, Captain" you say, pointing to his bloated wife
>He blushes and looks away, "Well, I did what I had to. Marital rights and such. But thanks anyways!"
>You notice that he has one of the largest smiles on his face you have ever seen. Pinkie would be very pleased if she noticed him
"Someone's happy, huh?"
>He can't help but do a little fist pump, "I'm stoked, Anon. I can't believe that I'm going to start a family! I'm going to be a daddy soon!" He's -this- close to bouncing around the room by now
"I have no doubt you'll make an excellent father."
You change the topic to calm him down before he looses his shit, "How was the pregnancy?"
>"Well, aside from the occasional craving, and maybe a comfort snuggle, things went pretty well. I'm just concerned about the birth though."
"Why would you say that?" you ask, a bit of concern in your voice

9/20

>He shrugs, "Well it's not that I don't have confidence in the staff or anything, in fact, that's why we're here in the Crystal Empire. They've got one of the best medical center available, despite being the empire being lost for one thousand years."
>Wait what?
"How the hell does that work?"
>"Not sure; don't question it. Anyways, like I said, the doctors are great, but I don't think I can bare to see my Cady in such agony."
You roll your eyes, "Aw quit being dramatic! You said it yourself, these doctors are trained professionals. I'm sure they'll make this as painless as possible for her"
>He sighs, "Yeah. I suppose you're right. I guess I'm just nervous about this whole experience."
"Well, you have every right to be. It is pretty fucking nerve-racking. But she needs you for support, so you better chill the fuck out soon or else she's on her own"
>A look of determination sparks in the Captain's eyes, "You're absolutely right Anonymous! I need to be strong, for her's and the baby's sakes."
"Here here! And hey, speaking of which, I'm a bit curious: what'll you name the little one?"
>The white unicorn rubs the back of his head, "Well we don't know if its going to be  a boy or a girl so we didn't want to choose anything yet. But we've been bouncing a few names around, just for fun" He says, shooting a wink at you.
>Wait a minute
>A thought just entered your head and it's starting to bother you a bit. It's time for some answers.
You wave off the captain for a moment, "Right. Hang on a second." You turn to the group of girls, "Hey Twilight?"
>"Yes Anon?"
"I've always wondered, but never got to ask about you p0nies: How do you ponies name your children so perfectly, despite them not being born with cutie marks?"

10/20

>She cocks her head slightly to the side with a look of confusion on her face, "What do you mean by that?"
>What does she mean, 'what do you mean by that'
>It's pretty fucking blatant, y'know
>You try to think up an example
"Well…how about Rarity?" You say, pointing to the fashion diva. "Her parents named her that without any prior knowledge that she would have diamonds on her butt. And then she grows up and her name fits perfectly. Isn't that weird?
>Shrugs all around
"And what about Fluttershy? Her parents couldn't have known about her timid personality when she was just a newborn, right? It doesn't make any sense how--"
>"Hold on there, partner. Where is that critter lovin' pegasus anyhow?"
>Everyp0ny looks around the room and at each other, but it's clear that no one has any idea where the mare went
>Ladies and gentlemen, Banana-ninja has left the building
>Where the hell could she have gone anyways?
>You would have looked into this a bit more, but her royal highness interrupted everyone with a long, low grunt
>A sudden stillness filled the room before the pink alicorn spoke up
>"Could someone please contact the doctor? I think I'm going into the next phase of labor."

11/20

>Oh shit son
>In a flash, everyp0ny in the room begins doing there own separate things spontaneously
>Shining Armor, naturally, rushes to his wife's side and holds one of her hooves for support
>Twilight is on her other side, telling the princess to relax and how they'll get the doctor as soon as possible
>Cadence scooches back on the bed she laid on and spreads her legs apart. She  continues to moan and grunt every so often
>Rainbow Dash exploded into the air to find a doctor as quick as she could. She takes to the air and heads right to the door with a flash of rainbow color air surrounding her. In hindsight, it probably should have been open before she flew off, but hey, concussions are in this year
>Applejack, seeing the neutralized Rainbow Bomber, rushes out of the room like a normal fucking being in search of a doctor to help
>Pinkie Pie busts out a camera and is setting up in the proper position. She is beaming with anticipation and it appears that she could go super saiyan at any moment
>Rarity, having nothing to do before hand, is tending to the wounded Rainbow Dash, who she threw down violently on a set of chairs in the corner of the room
>And you, Anon, are standing perfectly still watching this all unfold like a complete retard. You probably should be doing something right now, dumb ass, but you're reaction time and extreme apathy hinder your abilities to take action
>After a minute or so, Applejack rushes into the room with a doctor in tow

12/20

>The doctor is wearing a standard white operating coat with a medical mask covering most of her face
>Her flank has one of the sorriest cutiemarks you have ever seen. It's a medical clipboard that looks like it was sharpied on hastily
>She appears to be wearing a wig in an off position that covers up her pink mane oh fucking shit tits on a bun it's Fluttershy
>Son of a bitch pulled the ol' bait and switch
>"It's alright y'all! I found the doc! Everyone can calm down!"
>Sighs of relieve all around
>Wat
>"Um, Ja! Ich bin the doctor, und, um, I vill be ze one zu deliver de baby, Ja?"
>Are you fucking serious right fucking now
>What the fuck kind of accent is that anyway?
>Fluttershy moves to the end of the hospital bed to face Cadence
>"Thank goodness, doctor. We're so relieved to see you. My wife is going into labor right now and the baby is coming quickly!"
>Cadence grunts once more and moves into position, exposing her gross dilated horse vagina to Fluttershy as if she were a real fucking doctor
>"Oh! Jawohl! Um, Virst, Ich vill need ein assistant fer dis operation." Fluttershy points at you, "You vill do nicely. Come here, bitte."
>You stare agape at Flutterdoc pointing at you
>She notices your dumbfounded expression, "Now now, it ees not so hard, mein lieber. All I vant you to do ist put your hot monkey dick inside of mein vagina."
>Twilight speaks up, "Uh, doctor? How will that work exactly?"
>"Oh it ist very simple. You see, ven a human puts his hot, lusty, amazing dick inside a mare like myself, it causes all vaginas in der area to orgasm instantly. Zen, ze baby vill come out without any problems."
>"Wow! I've never heard about that technique. That sounds amazing!" Twilight beams
>"Well, if it'll make this less painful…" Shining Armor laments
>Fuck everything

13/20

>"Now zen, vill you be so kind, Anon?" Fluttershy says, exposing herself right in front of your face
>Cause, y'know, you needed more grotesque horse vaginas right in front of you
>You grab Impostershy and remove her mask, wig and coat in an instant
>She squeaks a bit and squirms in your hands
>The group of p0nies gasp at the reveal
>"Fluttershy? What in tarnation are ya doin'?"
>"And darling, since when did you receive medical training?"
>"Yeah Flutterbutter! I had no idea you were a doctor! I always figured you were hiding something suspicious, but now I know what it was! That's so cool of you that you deliver small foals into the world! Well, I mean, where else would you deliver them? They aren't pieces of mail you know. Except that one time where I found a foal in my mailbox. Boy was that awkward! And here I was thinking that the whole 'stork' thing was just made up by grown ups, but then, there it is! A baby in a mailbox! Hey! That reminds me of the time where I took the baby cakes to the post office--
>HOLY SHIT
>THIS P0NY WILL BE THE FUCKING END OF YOU
>THINK FAST
>You throw Fluttershy right at Pinkie Pie, causing them both to tumble over and hit a wall near the window
>Pinkie is down for the count
>Fluttershy staggers to her feet when you pick her up again and slam her head into the wall
>"O-Ow!" she yelps. You glare daggers into her eyes as she nervously smiles and asks, "Um, are doctors your fetish, Anon?"
>After repeatedly slamming the yellow p0ny into the wall a few dozen times, you return to the bedside area to rejoin the trio of panicked equines

14/20

>"What do we do?! We need a doctor here stat!" Twilight screams as she unintentionally shakes the bed, her mane becoming a frizzled mess
>"I know! I know!" Responds Shining Armor, "But if your friend has the doctor's clothes, that means she probably incapacitated him in order to get it! He's probably out cold by now."
>Since when did hospitals have only -one- person capable of delivering a baby?
>Cadence sighs, "Oh this stress cannot be good for the baby…"
>"Everyp0ny settle down!" Declares Applejack "Now ah have a little experience at this with sum animals back on the farm. Lemme see what ah can do"
>The orange coated mare walks to the edge of the bed and moves in close to Cadence's nether-region
>Without hesitating, she parts the outer walls with her hooves and examines the inside of the princess' body
>Ew. Gay
>"Well, ah can't see the lil' feller, but ah'm sure that--"
>Applejack's meaty hooves must have hit the wrong nerve or something
>A sharp, sudden gasp of pain came from the pink p0ny that cut the country farmer off. The alicorn instinctively pulls one of her bottom hooves back and slammes it square into Applejack's face
>Boomheadshot.mp3
>Treestomper falls backwards from the pink ponie's vag and collapses onto the floor
>Cadence recoils in horror at what had just occurred, "Oh no! I-I didn't mean…She just…Oh gosh! Who's going to deliver my baby now!"
>Rarity casually strolls over and adds Applejack to the pile of unconscious ponies in the corner, having just thrown Pinkie and Fluttershy there moments before
>Shining Armor is started to perspire heavily and his voice is cracking, "T-Twilly, can-can you do a spell, or-or anything?"
>Twilight is rubbing her temples, "No. It wouldn't be good for the baby. Can't you reach in and help her out?"
>"N-no. My hooves a-are too big. Th-they wouldn't fit inside." Shining replied on the verge of tears

15/20

>The fact that he knew instantly that his hooves wouldn't fit inside his wife's vagina disgusts and intrigues you
>Cadence lets out another cry of pain, causing the two to jump in surprise
>"Cadence!" Shining Armor grabs his wive's hoof and holds her tight, "Hold on, we'll think of something, right Twiley?"
>Twilight Sparkle looks at him in an unsure way. She hadn't planned on this going so horribly wrong!
>"Anon, what are we--"
>Suddenly, a bright smile flashed across the small unicorn's face, "Say Anon, would you consider human hands to be more dexterous than, oh…I dunno, a p0nie's hoof?"
>Aw hell naw
>You may be stupid, but you're not dumb
"Look, why don't we just get help from some trained, professional medical p0nies who know what the fuck they're doing?"
>"Hey yeah!" Adds Shining Armor, "Anon could go in, carefully grab the baby, and safely pull it out without injuring it, or Cadence!"
>So much for 'having my back' asshole
"Why didn't we just send Rarity to get some--" As turn your head to where you assume the white unicorn to be, you are horrified to see her molesting her friends violently as they remain unconscious due to injuries.
You sigh, "God fucking damn it." You promise to drink this one out of your memory later on, "Get me some gloves Twilight, quick."
>She bolts towards the medical cabinet in the room and shuffle threw the supplies until she finds a pair of latex gloves
>Considering ponies don't have and fingers, and therefore no use for gloves, you consider finding a pair considerably lucky
>Thank you Based God
>You snap them on and proceed to the expecting alicorn mother on the hospital bed
>A pause, a reflection of slight regret for being sober for this moment, and you're good to go
>You push back her vaginal folds and expose her birth canal

16/20

>If you had eaten something today, you probably would have thrown up right about now
>Creepy horse vaginas, man
>Shits scary
>You hear Cadence speak to you in a soothing tone in between her groans and cries, "Thank you so much for doing this, Anon. This is truly the most heroic thing someone can do for me. I don't know how I can ever repay you"
"Never bring this up again and we'll be square. Now, I need you to breathe in as deep as you can and push as hard as possible"
>The alicorn complies and soon you can see the tip of a unicorn's horn emerge from the inside the depths of the princess
>Shining Armor is visibly shaking as you plunge your arms into the pink abyss
>Twilight begins to encourage her former foalsitter, "C'mon, Cadence. Push! You can do it!"
>She screams and clutches the bedsheets hard
>It seems like that worked slightly as more of the foal begins to move forward
"Hey Shining?" You ask, elbow deep in his wife "Could you get me a towel or something like that, please?"
>"S-sure thing" He shuffles off to the medical counter and magic's a few paper towels over to you
"Thanks. The blood is making everything a bit hard to see"
>The prince's eyes go to pindrop size, "B-b-b-b-bl-bl-b-blood?" he stutters
>You remove one from his wife and show that it is, in fact, drenched with vaginal blood
>Yeah, it's fucking gross, but that's childbirth dumbass
>What did you expect
>As you prepare to re-enter the mare in front of you, there is a loud thud that catches you off guard
>You look up to see that the good Captain has fainted at the sight of blood
>Wow
>Fucking pussy

17/20

>Soon enough, Rarity tosses him onto the rape pile and continues her sexual conquest
>A scream from Cadence jolts you back into the situation at hand
>Oh yeah. That one thing with a baby or something
>You dive back into the action and move your arms around inside the pink alicorn, trying to find a good grip on the foal for you to pull
>As you reach in as deep as you can, the soon-to-be-newborn moves up just barely enough for you to wrap your fingers around
"Good enough!"
>You grab hold and pull with every iota of strength in your body
>Well not really; you don't want to hurt the little one now, but you still give it a good tug
>Twilight continues to cheer on her sister-in-law, "You're almost there! You're so close! Just push!"
>A gut curdling scream is all that the pink p0ny can reply as you feel the baby move closer to the exit
>For a few moments, the screams of Twilight Sparkle and Princess Mi Amore Cadenza are drowned out as you focus on your primary task
>The room becomes dead silent for you as your grip of this foal tightens, pulling it ever closer to the end
>Seconds begin to feel like hours as you work to aid this newborn in it's journey
>You feel the outline of this child with your fingers as it struggles to break free of it's biological containment and enter into this magical world
>You see the closed eyes and scrunched face as it finally penetrates through it's caring mother's protection
>You hear the foal's first cries for comfort as it begins to live as one of us on the outside
>But most of all, you feel the weight of your actions wash away with the arrival of this new life

18/20

>You sigh and turn to Twilight
You speak over the crying foal, "Get some more towels. We should clean it up before giving it to her."
>The purple unicorn, breathing heavily, smiles probably the first genuine smile of the day, "That sounds like a good idea, Anon."
>She begins to walk towards where her brother grabbed towels earlier, when a low groan came from the new mother
>Suddenly, a dark red wad of god-knows-what ejects from the princess and, smacks into Twilight with enough force to render her unconscious
>You decide that this knocked out shit -isn't funny- and getting old really fast
>You snag the towels and return to the princess, making sure to clean up the placenta that canonballed out of her

19/20

>As you towel off the newborn, Cadence asks you in a very weak, and tired voice, "Will…will everp0ny…be alright?"
"I'm sure of it. Just don't mention what happened to them after they lost consciousness and they'll be fine"
>A soft chuckle arises from the worn princess. Her eyes are fixated on her offspring which you have just finished cleaning off
"So," you say, placing her foal next to her, "how about a picture? I think I saw Pinkie Pie setting up a camera earlier."
>She doesn't respond for a moment, taking in the beauty of her creation. "That…sounds wonderful." She replies, kissing the top of the softly crying foal
"Hey, Rarity? Could you come here and take a picture for us?" You ask the white unicorn
>However, the fashionesta is too busy grinding her marehood against poor Applejack's defenseless nether region at the moment
>"STEAL MY SISTER FROM ME WILL YOU?! I'LL SHOW YOU 'APPLE PIE' BITCH"
"On second thought, fuck the picture" you decide, "You stay the hell away from here or else"
>You turn back to Cadence and notice that she has fallen asleep from exhaustion with her newborn cuddling close to her neck. Her head is craned over the foal as if it were shielding it from any danger that would come to harm the small creature
>It warms your heart to know that you helped make this moment happen, and, all and all, you guess you were glad you came along for the trip
>You decide now would be an excellent time to get some fucking medical staff in here to actually do something professional for a change

20/20