One Punch Man review

As One Joke Man's biggest fan, I had to review this series. I have to be the voice of reason. It has to be me. As my Swan Song for MAL, I will do my best to absolutely wreck this series, and deny any enjoyment anyone idiotic enough to have had the lack of brain cells claims to get from this odious piece of refuse. If this show had been any more shitty, it would have been found in the back of a truck stop bathroom clogging up the charred and fragmented remains of what was once a toilet.

However many times One Joke Man has made me vomit in disgust of how incredibly inept it is at even being a pale attempt at parody, it has made me many many more times sicker to see the community's reaction to this troglodytic, asinine, failed abortion of a recently dead 14 year old. That same pile of rotting corpses thrown into the shallowest of graves make up the sycophantic, circle jerking viewing populace of this turd of a show. If there's ever been anything more insufferable- internet rappers, SJWs, slacktivists, trashy people on social media, or anything of that tier of indescribable idiocy, there surely has not been a fandom to surpass the borderline mental illness-level of moronity of the cretins who make up the fans of One Punch Man.

It's not enough that the show itself is a weak, half ass "parody of shonen tropes and superheroes" that the fangirls so love to call it (in their pathetic attempts at reviews, consisting almost exclusively of "10/10 art was awesome 10/10 luv saitama 10/10 story was so funny i laffed until i acutually died. 10/10 best animay ever!")

No, the teeming hordes of plonkers on the web, all OVER the web, have lined up in order to jerk themselves, each other, and One Joke Man off every week for the past three months, with each masturbatory praising session of Saitama reaching ever and ever more euphoric heights. It's a wonder anyone can see their screen anymore after these sessions, as bodily fluids are typically bad for a computer's health. But, all their effort has not been in vain! The cancerous fanbase has raised One Jizz Man to the top 10 anime on this website, and to be the #1 rated TV series on IMDb, even. Apparently no one has ever before, and never will again see a better TV series than One Punch Man. It's over guys. Pack it up. There's no need to watch anime ever again. You've literally already seen the absolute best that Japan and the ENTIRE WORLD has to offer in 13 furious jerkoff sessions of 24 minutes and thirty one seconds at a time.

There's not ever going to be anything better. Might as well just never watch TV again, because it's impossible to match the perfect and flawless One Punch Man. You could call it a masterpiece of flawlessness and perfectness. There is absolutely nothing to fault about this show- the characters are all an infinite well of depth, the story is so groundbreaking, innovative, and life changing that I'm certain an epiphany on Biblical levels has been achieved. Pure enlightenment spews forth from the screen when OPM is on. I even read today that an American anime fan living in a bunker in Buttfucknowhere, New Jersey has synthesized a cure for every type of cancer, autoimmune disease, and mental illness ever before recorded after watching One Punch Man.

Saitama has saved not only the cities in the show, but the studio Madhouse, superhero media, MAL for being blessed with the opportunity to list One Punch Man as an entry and giving the priceless gift of allowing its members to vote on it, anime as a whole, Japan, and the entire world. Everything is safe now.

One Punch Man also generated so much in sales, because it's the perfect show that everyone had to own for themselves, SO much in sales that the creators of this God-level piece of entertainment media were able to donate enough money to charity to solve world hunger for the next 150 years. Wow. What an irrefutable, impressive effect that this one show has had on not only the world economy, but the intangibles and goodwill it has also given to the populace of the Earth. Truly a visionary show that has managed to bring together the world for one singular purpose. It has ended wars, stopped ISIS and racism, discrimination, hunger, sickness, and instilled but one purpose in all that exist as human beings:

Worship One Punch Man.

Your life isn't good enough for anything else.


LawlMartz