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- Twilight, Top hat, waratah
- >It was bound to happen.
- >Every year after Trixie makes her rounds through Ponyville.
- >Even though Twilight out does her in the form of unicorn magic, here you were in her treehouse watching her magic show.
- >"Ladies and Gentlecolts. Thank you for coming to the Terrific Twilights Tantalizing Talent Show!"
- >"Woo! You go Twilight!"
- >At least Spike is putting some effort into this.
- "Yay."
- >You look down at your watch.
- >4:00
- >Ugh.
- >Twilight enters the room from a cloud of purple mist wearing a black cape and top hat.
- >The machine creating the purple mist doesn't seem to want to turn off, and begins to clog the air.
- >Spike tries to turn off the machine, but it's all in vain.
- >The room steadily becomes more and more purple as everyone coughs.
- >Army crawl to the machine like a boss!
- >Grab the machine and line up the pass.
- >Looks like it's going to have to be a hail mary.
- >You throw the machine with all of your might.
- >In slow motion you watch the machine head towards one of the library's windows.
- >It shatters through the glass!
- "IT'S GOOD!"
- "THE PATRIOTS WIN THE SUPER BOWL!"
- "JOHN MADDEN JOHN MADDEN JOHN MADDEN!"
- >Twilight and Spike stare at you as the purple smoke slowly exits the room.
- "You know it was awesome."
- >Retaking your seat, you look back down at your watch.
- >4:01.
- >Great.
- >"For my first trick, I will need help from the audience."
- >"OOH! OOH PICK ME! PICK ME!" screams the baby dragon.
- >Spike is jumping up and down on his seat with both arms extended in the air.
- >You continue to stare blank-eyed, anywhere but to where Twilight is standing, staring at you.
- >Oh man, you are tired.
- >You shouldn't have stayed up so late last night.
- >Then again, you had a great reason.
- >It's not every night that you get to eat 50 cakes.
- >Injustice would ravage the land if you didn't.
- >Plus the Cakes would never find out.
- >Maybe.
- >Feeling an itch in the middle of your back, you reach to scratch the itch.
- >"Anon!"
- "What?"
- >"You raised your hand!"
- >You look up at your raised hand.
- "Fuck."
- >Walk up to her makeshift stage made out of books, and stand next to her.
- >Spike is visibly jealous that you were picked instead of him.
- >"Alright Anon!"
- >She takes off her top hat and places it on a table in front of you.
- >"Clearly an ordinary top hat? Correct?"
- "Uh. Yeah."
- >You look inside.
- >Looks empty enough.
- >"Reach in and pull out your heart's desire." says Twilight with a smile.
- >"This is my favorite part!" says Spike angrily.
- >You reach into the hat and begin to feel around.
- >Well, one thing for sure, it doesn't feel like a hat.
- >In fact, it's warm, and slimey.
- >You move to reach deeper.
- >"NO NO NO NO! I HAVENT RESET IT YET." screams Twilight.
- >Her face is visibly red, as she casts a spell on the hat.
- >You look to her, then to Spike, then to her.
- >"150 bits."
- "Sold."
- >You reach back into the hat, and slowly pull out a glowing flower.
- >It's the weirdest flower that you have ever seen.
- >"Oh Anon! You found a Magical Waratah!"
- "Uh. This is a flower. Not Rarity."
- >"RARITY! WHERE?" Exclaims the tiny dragon.
- >You ignore Spike for the moment to refocus on Twilight.
- "So what does it do?"
- >"Well... I don't know. Maybe if we took careful time to research it, we might be able to figure out how it works."
- "Hmmm. Learning it's supernatural properties seems like quite the intelligent decision."
- >Twilight's eyes light up, forgetting the magic show.
- >"Then let's go down to the lab and-"
- >Eat that shit!
- >Awww yiss.
- >"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"
- "Eating. I'm starving."
- >Suddenly a massive table of food appears in front of you.
- "Damn, I'm gunna need so much chocolate milk to eat dis shit."
- >Three gallons of chocolate milk appear on the table.
- >...
- >Aww yiss.
- >"Anon, I dunno if you should-"
- "Twilight shut up."
- >Twilight's mouth jumps off her face and rolls out the door.
- >The purple unicorn looks like she is about to cry.
- "Uhh... Why the long face?"
- >She stares bullets at you.
- "If I give you your mouth back, will you lecture me?"
- >Twilight shakes her head.
- "Speak."
- >The mouth reappears on her face.
- >"Anon! How can you be so careless!"
- "Nope."
- >The mouth vanishes once again as you skip out of the library.
- >Time to head back home.
- >Strutting past Carousel Boutique, you see Rarity sweeping the front of her store.
- >Your epic swagger kicks up more dust and infuriates the marshmallow pone.
- >"Anonymous! Would you please stop being such a hooligan for 10 minutes?"
- "Why don't you stop being such a bitch?"
- >Oh yeah.
- >Burn.
- >You feel a tug on the back of your pants.
- >Turning around, you see Rarity with a wide smile.
- >"Hug?"
- >You stare at her.
- "Go back the old way. I liked that better."
- >Returning to your home, you point at the table.
- "PIZZA!"
- >The table turns into a pizza.
- >Fuck.
- >You hear a knock from your door.
- >Spinning in place, you point at the door.
- "Who is it?"
- >The door explodes.
- >"EEEEP!"
- >Fluttershy stands, shocked at the door dematerializing in front of her.
- "Whassup Flutterbutter?"
- >"O-oh. Uhm... Well."
- >She pulls out a chocolate cake and places it on the ground.
- >Not this fucking shit.
- "Fluttershy. Stop doing whatever you doing. Stop the fetish guessing and just ask me out for a date."
- >She stares at you.
- >Her pupils become the size of needles.
- >Awww shet.
- >HIT THE DECK!
- >You dive behind the couch just before the yellow pegasus explodes into a countless number of yellow mini-marshmallows.
- >Well. Looks like life is going to be a lot more interesting. All thanks to that awesome, magical,
- >Fucking Waratah.
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