slimebot.py

#!/usr/bin/env python

from random import random, choice
from time import sleep
from tweepy import API, OAuthHandler, TweepError
from datetime import datetime

def flip():
    return random() < 0.5

def pick(seq):
    return str.strip(choice(seq))

def pluralize(word):
    if word[-1] is 's':
        return word + 'es'
    elif word[-1] is 'y' and word not in ['tity', 'tiddy']:
        return word[:-1] + 'ies'
    else:
        return word + 's'

def condplural(word):
    return pluralize(word) if flip() else word

def withso(seq):
    def so_inner(word):
        return 'so ' + word
    return map(so_inner, seq)

consumer_key = 'consumer key goes here'
consumer_secret = 'consumer secret goes here'
access_token = 'access token goes here'
access_secret = 'access secret goes here'
auth = OAuthHandler(consumer_key, consumer_secret)
auth.set_access_token(access_token, access_secret)
api = API(auth)

while True:
    nouns = open('C:/Users/rich_sky/Documents/slime/nouns1.txt').readlines()
    actions = open('C:/Users/rich_sky/Documents/slime/actions1.txt').readlines()
    verbs = open('C:/Users/rich_sky/Documents/slime/verbs1.txt').readlines()
    adjectives = open('C:/Users/rich_sky/Documents/slime/adjectives1.txt').readlines()
    phrases = open('C:/Users/rich_sky/Documents/slime/phrases1.txt').readlines()
    reasons = open('C:/Users/rich_sky/Documents/slime/reasons1.txt').readlines()
    superlatives = open('C:/Users/rich_sky/Documents/slime/superlatives1.txt').readlines()
    hearts = [u'\u2764', u'\U0001f495', u'\U0001f496', u'\U0001f497', u'\U0001f499',
              u'\U0001f49a', u'\U0001f49b', u'\U0001f49c', u'\U0001f49d']

    phrase = pick(phrases)
    while '{' in phrase:
        oldphrase = phrase[:]
        phrase = phrase.replace('{noun}', pick(nouns), 1)
        phrase = phrase.replace('{noun:s}', pluralize(pick(nouns)), 1)
        phrase = phrase.replace('{noun:s?}', condplural(pick(nouns)), 1)
        phrase = phrase.replace('{verb}', pick(verbs), 1)
        phrase = phrase.replace('{action}', pick(actions), 1)
        phrase = phrase.replace('{adjective}', pick(adjectives), 1)
        phrase = phrase.replace('{reason}', pick(reasons), 1)
        phrase = phrase.replace('{superlative}', pick(superlatives), 1)
        phrase = phrase.replace('{adjective:super}', pick(adjectives + superlatives), 1)
        phrase = phrase.replace('{adjective:sosuper}', pick(withso(adjectives) + superlatives), 1)
        if phrase == oldphrase:
            raise RuntimeError('Malformed phrase: %s' % phrase)
    phrase = phrase.replace('<3', choice(hearts))

    print('%s %s' % (datetime.now(), phrase))
    try:
        api.update_status(phrase)
    except TweepError as e:
        print('    failed: %s' % e.message)
        continue
    sleep(1500)