Cathouse tragedy.

>Be Norman Normal.
>Today, you were ill and had to stay home from school.
>Your parents weren't very clear on what you were allowed to do and not to do.
>"Don't play Xbox all day and sleep and drink a lot". That's what they said.
>Of course, you weren't having any of that.
>Xbox all day.

>You get up and have a look at the clock.
>9:43 AM.
>Your parents won't be home for another 12 hours.
>Guess what time it is.
>You lay down on the sofa and sog your trusty console in the jaw.
>Nothing happens.
>You slap it again.
>Nothing.
>You turn your head to look at it.
>It's got the red eye of doom.
"Goddamnit"

>Now you have nothing to do.
>Fuck it, outside hasn't killed you yet.
>You grab your jacket and head out.
>It's quite cold outside.
"Well fuck, guess I should've put a thicker jacket on."
>A bit of cold hasn't ever killed a man, as far as you know anyway.
>After a bit of walking through town, you find something most unusual.
>A brothel.
>You check both ways to make sure that no one sees, and head in.
>"AAAAH ANOTHER GUEST, PERFECT!" yells a man behind you.
>You're dragged to a room filled with other people, some male, some female, young, old, alive, dead, you fucking name it.

>"Gentlemen!" Shouts a man in black. You all stare in his direction.

"Come on in, right on in!"
To our temple of sin!"
The sensual land, sublime
With multiple versions
Of every perversion
And women of every kind
>Oh shit.
If you’re a fellow
Who likes a bordello
With something on for a change,
Two dollars more,
You can have a dead whore
We specialize in the strange
"How do I get out of here" You scream internally

If you get lucky this evening
And one takes you up for a whirl
Might I suggest you look under the dress
‘Cause we can’t tell the boys from the girls here!

Tragedy! At the cathouse tonight!
Come and see
Why we like to call our cathouse
Tragedy!
What a curious sight!
Our female selection
Is not quite perfection
It’s like biting into a bitter confection
At Cathouse Tragedy!
>He gives you a tour around the place.

There’s an Asian albino
>She looks a lot like Rarity...
And as far as I know
She has the prosthetic eye
And if you approve it
She’ll gladly remove it
If you tire of her thighs
>Christ.

Don’t be alarmed
By the girl with no arms
>That's the young one from school, what's her name? Sco-something.
She’s actually quite a treat
And if you wanna
She’ll peel your banana
She’s bloody good with her feet!

If you get lucky this evening
And one takes you up for a spin
Might be suggestin’
A lamby intestine
You don’t know where these girls have been!
>Fuck me, I need to get to meet that arm-less girl right now.
>The man stares at a guy who apparently comes here alot. The man had yelled out, "LEMME FUCK SOME CATS ALREADY!"
They called you pretty.
>He pinches the man's cheek.
In your hometown
Not to be petty,
But here in the city,
You’re not all that pretty,
You’re lucky we keep you around!

Now get back to work!

Come on in to the cathouse!
We’ve got pussies of every kind!
We have black, white and yellow and red ones!
And only one or two are feline!
I’m your benevolent MC
And I’m here to make sure they behave
Sure, they smell like cheese
>You put your palm over your mouth so as to not throw up
And they’re full of disease,
But just think of the money you’ll save!

>When he's done with his yelling, you just bolt out of the room and head for the young lady without arms.
>"Aah, someone finally visited me". She says with a little smile.
>Her smile fades away when she sees who her visitor is.
>"You, I know you, don't I?"
"I was going to ask you the same thing"
>You spend some time talking.
>*BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM*
>"OI, THERE ARE OTHERS THAT WANTS TO GET THEIR BANANAS PEELED"
>You just go out and head back home.
>The first thing you do is vomit.
>Second thing is go to bed.
>What the hell is wrong with this city?