SvtFoE: King Me, Part 1

SvTFoE: King Me P.1

Summary: Star has an arranged marriage hanging over her head and a cunning plan to get out of it. Marco doesn't know what he's in for.

Note: This is my first fic that'll probably amount to a series of some sort. I don't really know where i'm going with it, but i'll try to make it enjoyable to read, wherever it goes.
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	"Star?" Marco hollered out from the hallway, "Staaaaar?" He made his way down the hall, a bag of Chinese take-out rustling in his hand with each step. He reached in, fishing out for a 'magical' fortune cookie.

	"I got extra fortune cookies!" He called out once more, yet there was no usual abrupt throw open of the door and hurried rush that he had come to expect from the Princess of Mewni. He furrowed his brow, a bit perplexed by the response, or lack thereof.

	"Star?" Marco exclaimed in an inquisitive manner as he opened her door. He was greeted with the view of the princess's room, but no princess. His gaze steered over to the end of the room and found her lying face down on her bed.

	"Oh, there you are."

	"Ugghhhhhhhhhhh..." She groaned.

	"You bored again?" He said, entering her room.

	"Noooo..." She raised her head to look at Marco. He sat on the bed, pulling out a plastic-wrapped fortune cookie.

	"Here you go." He said, handing it to her. She thanked him and sat up. She pulled apart the plastic and took out the slightly stale yellow cookie.

	"So, what's up?"

	"Hmm... look for the answers in your friends..." She recited the fortune aloud and stopped to ponder it.

	"Star?"

	"Huh?" She turned back to Marco, "Oh yeah, um..." She felt a tremor in her heart, a knot in her throat. She didn't want to think about it, let alone speak about it. However, she wanted to tell Marco, her best friend. Surely, he could help her.

	She thought back to the fortune.

	Star took a deep breath, "Well I was... my parents called on the mirror—or, actually I called them."

	"Uh-huh."

	"So my mom was talking, actually my dad was talking, but my mom was talking in the background, and... uhh..." She swallowed hard. Her eyes shifted about as she looked at the floor. Marco frowned. He noticed her reluctance. This seemed serious, not like fighting giant monsters in life-threatening situations. She was stopped dead in her own speech.

	The words just didn't seem to come together.

	Star turned to Marco. He smiled awkwardly in an attempt to reassure her.

	"Here," He said, putting his hand on her shoulder, "Let's talk it over some Lo Mein." He said, hoisting the bag up.

---

	Some time later, the two were sitting in the dining room, their forks dug into bowls of Chinese noodles. Star was a little less enthusiastic, mostly moving the noodles around and seldom taking a bite.

	"So," Marco started, wiping his mouth with a napkin, "Is there something wrong?"

	She set down her fork with an audible clink against the wooden table.

	"Sorta." She said with an unusually unsure tone.

	"What do you mean?" He asked, shoveling another fork-full of noodles in his mouth.

	"Well, I dunno really but..." She took a deep breath, "Okay. I was talking to my parents and overheard my mom talking about... an arranged marriage."

	"An arranged marriage?"

	She nodded as the words finally came out, "A royal one... with some random dumb prince."

	"Oh, I... uhh..." Marco didn't expect the political nature of the issue.

	"I don't think it's sure thing yet," She said, "but i'm kinda of scared of it." Her tone was a sort of fear of inevitability, a worried sadness Marco had not yet heard before in his ditzy, jovial companion.

	"I don't wanna get married to some uptight dork I've never met before," She continued, "I'm only like fourteen! Ughhh." She sighed.

	Marco was still relatively silent. He didn't really know how to deal with the situation or what to say. He had no experience with royal matters or having one's fate predetermined by one's own parents. An awkward silence came over them. He sat there, looking at his bowl, his fork stagnant in the bowl. Star rested her head in her palms, a somber and dejected gaze towards the table.

	And then, out of the blue:

	"Marco." She looked up towards him. His eyes reciprocated her gaze.

	"Will you marry me?"

	Marco's eyes widened, "Wait, WHAT?"

	"No-no-no-no-no, I mean it in like a royal way," She waved her hands, "Like a royal marriage."

	"Star, here on Earth, marriage is a...  a special—"

	"I know, I know, it's the same on Mewni." She retorted, "But I mean, you don't 'have to' like me back! That's how these things are. It's just..." Her tone took another dramatic shift, she spoke more softly, "It's just, with you, I'd be getting married to my best friend, not some guy I don't know."

	"I—I don't think... You'd have t—to ask my parents—I just..."

	"Please, Marco. I don't want to be forced into a stupid marriage with some stupid noble."

	"Uhh... I'm not really the ri—right person for this..."

	"They're always holding this over my head and, just for once, all my fears could—"

	"I'm not even any sort of royalty!" Marco stammered out, "I'm just a kid! Your parents would never say 'yes' to you marrying a nobody."

	"But you're 'Marco!' Karate warrior of the House of Diaz!" Star was desperate, "We could ask the Emperor of America to give you a fief or two. I'm the Princess of Mewni! I can bargain wi—"

	"No, Star. I'm just a kid living with two nobody parents." He said, "And, uh, there's no emperor of America. There isn't a single 'real' ruling royalty in this whole half of the world."

	"What? No ruling royalty? Like... no emperors?" The conversation digressed.

	"No."

	"Kings?"

	"No."

	"Dukes?"

	"Nope."

	"Counts?"

	"Na-ah."

	"...Barons?"

	He nodded his head from side to side in negation.

	"Who's in power?!" Star exclaimed, completely taken off guard by this development, "Why isn't America on fire and in complete chaos now?"

	"Because America is a democracy."

	"Dem-mo-cra-see?"

	"A republic."

	"So... merchants rule America?"

	"Not really." He got up from the table.

	"Where are you going?" Star asked. She still had tons of questions to ask him.

	"Let me get a map, one minute!" Marco ran off, out of the kitchen, rather eager to get out of the awkwardness that just occurred. Star sat at the kitchen table, alone once more minus her face down in a bed. There was a lot to think about. She was rash in what she did: suddenly asking her best friend, from out of nowhere, to marry her... which was kinda stupid now that she thought of it. But the alternative would be far worse.

	This wasn't stupid. This was worth a shot.

	The bowl of Chinese noodles before her was getting colder with each passing moment. Having managed to spit out what was on her mind, the knot in her stomach untied just a little bit. She felt like she could eat, but awaited what Marco had to say about the lack of royalty in the strange land of Echo Creek and America and whatever it would mean for her future.

	"Alright, I have it here." Marco said, entering the dining room. With him, a laptop in his hands.

	"Here, Star. Take a look at this." He put the laptop down in front of her and dragged his chair over so that he could sit next to her.

	"This right there is where we are."

	"Oosa?"

	"Huh?"

	"Oosa! It says it right there."

	"You mean U-S-A?"

	"Ohhhh... What does it stand for?"

	"United States of America."

	"So... this is what you mean by America?"

	"Well... yes-and-no. These whole land masses, continents, are called America." He pointed to them on the screen, "North America... and South America."

	"Mmm hmm." She nodded, chewing on her wand.

	"Each of these states have like... different names... this is Canada, this is Brazil... and the USA was made of a bunch of states that united together. So we're called the United States. And we're in America. So: United States of America."

	"Okay. What did you mean when you called it a republic?"

	"Well, in a way, we all rule America—I mean is, the USA"

	"Woooooah... so... I rule America too?" Her eyes widened at the notion.

	"What I mean is, A few people here will run for President, the ruler, if they're good enough. We get to vote for the ones we like. Whoever gets the majority wins, yadda yadda yadda, something about three branches, and then we get that President for four years... but back to our original point."

	Star was bewildered by this new proposal. She had the power to elect the ruler of the USA. She wasn't even the queen of Mewni and she already had power over here on Earth. She loved it here.

	"You know what this means, Marco?" She asked, excitedly. She had an overall giddy aura to here, a sharp turn from how she acted a few minutes ago.

	"What?"

	"We should go vote you into power!" She stood up from the table.

	"We—"

	"C'mon, Marco." She grabbed his arm, "Oh this is so exciting!"

	"Star."

	"They always said I was too young for 'politics' and 'adult stuff,' and 'don't knock over that flower vase.' Now, i'll show—"

	"Staaaaar!"

	"Huh?" She stopped.

	"We can't vote."

	"What? Why?!"

	"We're not eighteen, you're not even a citizen, and I have no idea how to run a country."

	"Oh, what?! That's dumb."

	"And aren't you forgetting the conversation we were having in the first place?"

	She tilted her head in a look of confusion.

	"No...?"

	"The marriage thing? Hello?"

	"Oh... right..." She suddenly realized the situation once more, "Stupid, stupid, stupid..." She hit the wand against her head with each utterance.

	"Wait, let's go back to the computer," Star said. The two of them walked back from the front door and towards the table, "So the USA is a republic... and these two... what about Meeee... ex-eco? Oh wait, that's Mexico!"

	"Yeah, good job! But it's a democracy too. Like I said, this whole half of the world." He gestured across the screen and then closed the laptop, "Anyway, I'm not your solution to this problem. Oh well, I guess we could probably talk to your parents or something," he shrugged, took the laptop, and began walking away towards where it was previously charging, "The only way to change a government like that would be to... I dunno, start a revolution?"

	"...start a revolution..."

	"...a revolution..."

	The words left a distinct echo. A thought stirred in her mind. It morphed into an idea. A mischievous smile found itself on her face. She just might be able to get out of the possible marriage yet.

---The Next Day---

	"Let's see... we could move the first couple armies here... and then take this city here... a few regiments from the sides... maybe even sea landings up top?" Star was drawing up her battle plans in the middle of history class. Reclining in the desk, she stared intently at the paper, a map of North America, wearing away the lead of a number-two pencil.

	"And... some here... some there... aaaaaand... DONE!" She stood up, shouting as she did so. The whole class stared at her, noticeably shaken but the mid-lecture interruption. She looked around to all the various pairs of eyes. The teacher at the front cleared his throat with a 'sit-down' cough.

	"Heh-heh... heh... sorry." She awkwardly apologized and slowly eased back into her chair.

	"As I was saying, the lower classes strongly resented..." The teacher returned to his previous subject.

	"Marco... Marcoooo." She whispered to her adjacent friend, who stopped writing his notes mid-stroke to address her, "Look what I drew! Pretty good, right?

	"That's a cute puppy." He whispered back and turned back to his notes.

	"Puppy?! What?" She looked at the paper, grumbling to herself that it wasn't a puppy and that her plan was flawless. She set the pencil down in disappointment and groaned. To take her mind off of it, and with nothing really left to do given her pencil's eraser and point were stubs, she did something she never thought she would:

	Pay attention to the lesson.

	"...a chain of events. After Francisco Madero challenged Porfirio Diaz, the people came together to overthrow Diaz. Once Madero came into power, nothing changed and people got upset again. This is on the worksheet, by the way. Next came Pancho Vil-la." He pronounced the "L's" as in "village." The teacher moved over to the board, where there was a vertical line with dates and list of names in red dry erase marker. In a vacant space below two names, he wrote in "PONCHO VILLA".

	"Okay, if you look at the third box on the worksheet, that's what we're talking about now. 'Pancho Vil-la' was a Mexican revolutionary from Chi-hua-hua. That's the north. El Nor-tay as they say in Espan-nol. Recall the trend we talked about between the north and south? With the support of the upset farmers he led a revolution against Madero's government. This is another... phase, yeah, that's the word. Another phaaaase" The teacher gesticulated.

	"Wait a minute." Star muttered under her breath.

	"...Pancho Villa was a Mexican revolutionary from Chihuahua..."

	"...a Mexican revolutionary from Chihuahua..."

	"...Mexican revolutionary...Chihuahua..."

	"Chihuahuas..." Star drooled to herself, "Cute, adorable, yipping—No, Star, focus!" She shook her head from side to side, "Focus on the other thing. Idea... Idea, c'mon... put two and two together and... I got it!" She mentally exclaimed, this time without disrupting the class, "It's been done once, I can do it better."

	"I'll start a revolution in Mexico!" She said to herself once more.

	"What did you just say?" Marco turned to her.

	"Oh, nothing, just taking notes." She said, doodling random scribbles on her puppy map.

	"Hmm." Marco looked at her with brief suspicion before turning back to filling out the boxes on his timeline worksheet.

	"Soon-to-be-King Marco." She whispered.

---Later That Day---

	Star stood in front of her interdimentional mirror, anxiously awaiting it to connect to her desired recipient. She faintly saw her reflection in the mirror as it did so.

	She could see her own excitement.

	After a few minutes, the screen flashed and fizzed to the image of a short, bearded man with a crown.

	"Hiiiii, Dad!" She waved.

	"Well hello, Star! How are things over there on Earth?"

	"Oh fine, just fine... and you?"

	"An absolute bore! I haven't slain a monster in four days! I've been stuck on this wretched throne, ruling."

	"Really? I think I have just the fix for that."

	"Hmm?" Her dad was intrigued, "What do you suppose?"

	"Weeelllll... I'll need to borrow some soldiers, some cannons, maybe even some of those dragon mammoths..."

	"Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho! What is this?" His interest was thoroughly peaked, "My beloved daughter is finally taking after me? Continue, by all means!"

	"How does the word 'overthrow' sound?"

	"Hmm." He stroked his beard, "What exactly are we overthrowing here?"

	"Mexico."

	"What is this Mexico?"

	"It's a republic."

	"A repub—A republic!? Those blasted merchants!" He clenched his fist in anger, "Their humors shall rot in their living bodies! You can count me in!" He drew his sword and held it to the sky.