Filly Funtasia One-Shots

>Day cupcakes in Funtasia
>Be Anonymous
>Chilling with your bro Will in the quad of the school grounds
"That's bullshit!  You literally just had them!"
>"Hey!  Someone swiped them on me when I wasn't looking!"
"Well thanks to your retarded ass, now what are we supposed to bring to Rose's party tonight?"
>"Don't call me retarded!"
>Will pushes you.
"I'll call you whatever I want, you prancing fairy fuck."
>You push him away with your foot.
>"Pink monkey!"
"Faggot!"
>The two of your lunge at each other and clash.
>You roll over each other on the ground as each of you throw punches, kicks, and headbutts.
>"Hey!  Stop it!  Stop fighting!"
>You and Will stop your struggling and look up.
>Rose stands over the two of you with an angry sort of look on her face.

>"Uh...  Hi," greeted Will.
"Sup."
>"If you two don't stop fighting, I'm not inviting you to my birthday party tonight!" threatened Rose.
"Pfft...  Fighting?"
>"We're not fighting, Rose!  We're just... uh..."
"Wrestling!"
>"Yeah! Wrestling!"
>You take your hands away from Will's throat and stand; helping him up as well.
>"O-Oh.  Okay.  I'll see you tonight then."
>Rose shakes her head and walks away.
>"I'll never understand boys," she mutters to herself.
>You and Will stand there and admire her swaying ass as she walks away.
"I think we both win this time," you say to Will as you watch her.
>"You said it.  What were we fighting about?"
>You open your mouth to speak, but nothing comes out.
"I can't remember."
>"Yeah me neither."
"Wanna go play soccer?"
>"Yeah sure.  Why not?"
>The two of you head off to find a soccer ball.
>"I was totally about to kick your ass though."
"Whatever, dude."
>"Filthy human."
"Fucking faggot."

--

>Day bachelor in Funtasia
>Be Anon
>Looking dapper as fuck as you strut through the halls of the Royal Magic Academy
>You traded your crown for this kick ass fedora you found in the dumpster
>What were you doing in the dumpster?
>Don't ask so many questions
>You got a fucking fedora!
>You spot Bella coming up the stairs outside the library
>Stopping in your tracks, you lean your back against the wall, duck your head, and place a hand on your hat.
>"Hi Anonymous!" greets Bella as she comes near.
"Hey, sexy mama.  Are your parents retarded? Because you sure are special."
>Bella stops in her tracks and tilts her head at you.
>"What?"
"You got a fine set of legs there.  What time do they open?"
>"I-I don't..."
"What has 146 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk?  My zipper."
>"I'm gonna go."
>Bella continues walking to the library.
"I'm from the FBI, The Female Body Inspectors, and I need you to assume the position."
>Bella raises an eyebrow at you before she disappears into the library.
>She wants the D.
>There's no way she can resist your charms.
>Suddenly you feel someone brush up against you.
>"You can inspect my body, Anon~," said Lynn in a seductive voice.
"Don't touch me, lesbo."
>You put your hand over her face and shove her away.
>You throw you newfound fedora into the nearest trashcan.
>That shit's attracting carpet munchers.
>Time to go find some sweet filly poon.

--

>Parent's Day.
>You were in the library with Will and speaking to his parents.
>They seem to enjoy your company as they prod you about human culture and you ask Will's mom if she has any baby pictures of him.
>Will's pissed, but that's okay because he's an asshole and your best friend.
>The low rumble of thunder sounds in the distance.
>It catches your attention and you look towards the sky out the nearest window.
>The sky was clear and the sun shone bright.
"Excuse me," you say to Will's parents as you leave the library.
>Will checked out the window as well and nodded in your direction in understanding.
>You leave the library and walk down the stairs.
>Down another hall and out the door to the quad.
>You cross the school grounds and look to the sky once more as more thunder sounds.
>A small dark cloud lingers over the female dormitory and is slowly growing in mass.
>Entering the doors to the dorm, you head to the female wing and climb to the third floor.
>Walking down the hall, you stop at a room and knock.
>The soft sniffles of the one inside are barely audible through the door.
>You wait in silence for a minute before knocking again.
>The soft clopping of hooves on the wooden floor hit your ears before the door opens.
>Lynn stands at the door with red eyes.
>Wiping her leg over her eyes, she asks, "What do you want?" with a shaky voice.
"Are you okay?" you ask with sincere concern.  "What's wrong?"
>"What makes you think something's wrong?"
>You give her a deadpan stare and point up to the roof.
>More thunder rolls.
>"Oh right. Stupid cape..."
>She leaves the door open as she retreats back into her room, prompting you to follow.
>Closing it behind you, you tail her to her bed where she lies down on her face.
>You sit on the edge of the bed next to her and lay your hand on her shoulder.

"So what's up?" you ask again.
>"My parents aren't coming," she says into her pillow.
>You can't help but smile a bit but you quickly brush it off your face.
"Any real reason?"
>Lynn rolled over on her side and faces you.
>"They're just busy and stuff."
"That's a shame.  You know, my parents didn't show up either."
>"That's because you don't have any parents."
"Oh, gee.  Thanks.  Because that doesn't make me feel any better about today either."
>Lynn chuckled at your sarcastic remark.
>"Yeah.  I guess you do have it pretty rough compared to the rest of us."
"Just do what I do."
>"What's that?"
"Pal around and meet everyone else.  It helps distract and keep your mind off the fact that you're alone today."
>Lynn sat quiet for a moment.
>"Yeah, I suppose so."
>She sat up beside you and rubbed her eyes again.
"That's the spirit," you say, giving her a quick scratch her behind the ears. "Come on, Kratos."
>You stand off the bed.
>"I told you not to call me that!"
>Lynn hops off as well and you start walking out of the room.
"Ah whatever.  Will's mom was showing me some baby pictures and was about to tell us the story of how Will got his head caught in a cardboard box for 3 days straight."
>"Ha!  Oh wow.  I need to see this."
>The little cloud and thunder had started to clear up, allowing the sun to shine on the school once more.

--

>Day jousting in Funtasia.
>Be Anon.
>Cedric wanted some practice in order to try out for the jousting team.
>"You can't be a knight and not know how to joust!" he would say.
>You were obligated to help him after he bribed you with some burritos.
>Can't say no to a good burrito, now can you?
>Cedric had gotten his gear on and was waiting at the far end of the field.
>"You ready?" he called.
>You were just finishing stuffing your last burrito in your face.
>With a full mouth, you give him a thumbs up.
>"Go!" shouts Cedric as he starts running down the field.
>You were licking your fingers as he was closing in.
>Unlike Cedric who was decked out in armor with a shield and lance strapped to him, you opted for just the shield and lance because filly armor didn't fit.
>Whatever.
>Wiping your hands on your pants, you start a slow jog towards Cedric.
>As you meet, your opponent shouts and goes to jab your shield with his lance.
>Unfortunately for him, you have an entire arm's reach over him as you thrust your lance hard into his shield.
>Cedric's breath leaves him as he tumbles over and lands in a heap.
>Victorious, you cross the line and prop one foot up on his body.
"Uraaa!!!" you shout into the sky.

>Your defeated opponent kicks his legs about and rocks his body, but can't get up.
>"Uh...  Little help here?" he asks.
"Sure thing, bud."
>You drop your gear and extend a hand.
>Grasping his hoof, you yank him up so that he may stand on his own.
>"Thanks," he says before removing his helmet and setting it on the ground.  "Dang it.  I was sure I had you that time."
"Maybe you should find someone of equal skill to practice against?" you suggest.  "Or build?"
>"Yeah, maybe.  It would help if this armor wasn't so bulky."
"At least you're not dead," you say with a shrug.
>From outside the field, you hear a voice call for you and Cedric.
>Looking back, you spot Willow waving to you.
>"Hey guys!  Cafeteria's serving up dinner!" called Will.  "They got corndogs!"
"Aw hells yeah!"
>You leave your gear on the ground as you start off towards Will.
>"Hey wait!  Anon, help me put this stuff back!" said Cedric as he scrambles to pick up his helmet.
>In his mild panic, he trips and falls over again.
"Yo, do me a solid and put that stuff away for me?" you ask.
>Cedric kicks around, trying to get back up.
>"Anon!  Help!"
"I can't!  Corndogs!" you call back, jogging away from him.
>"Anon!"