Ponecraft

>Poneville lies in shambles.
>Houses boarded up, and ever ever present miasma of desolation and fear hangover our beloved town.
>We are few in number now, a hooffull left to stand against the prevailing darkness.
>Now is the end of days.
>He came to us in a time of prosperity and peace, bringing his weapons of war and destruction.
>Weapons the likes of which we had never seen, and could not hope to overcome.
>Some of us tried to adapt, to reverse engineer his technology for our own purpose.
>We failed.
>One of our best engineers was lost in such a fashion.
>Pinkie, may Celestia guide you home.
>She was so sure that she could bring us victory, but all her work came to naught.
>Now we wait, huddled together in defiance of the end.
>He is coming.
>Twilight stands before us, a fire in her eyes that could almost make you believe there is hope in this hour of need.
>"Sons of and daughters of Equestria, of Poneville. My brothers and sisters. I see in your eyes the same fear that would take the heart of me! A day may come, when the courage of pone fails, when we forsake our friends and break all bonds of Fellowship, but it is not this day!"
>As her passionate voice rings out, you see a red speck rising in the distance.
>"An hour of humans and shattered hopes when the age of pone comes crashing down! But it is not this day!"
>Pushing through the crowd, you watch as the projectile reaches it's apex and begins to fall.
>"This day we fight! By all that you hold dear on this good planet, I bid you, stand, Pones of Equestria!"
>"As the last few brave assembled pones cheer, you violently shove Twilight to the side.
>Closing your eyes, you resign yourself to your fate.
>Splash
>"DERPY NO!!!"
>He is coming.

>Be Anon.
Damnit, I missed her.
>Standing on the crest of a hill overlooking town, you decide to survey your equipment one last time before the final assault.
>Munition belts across your chest toting water balloons.
Check.
>You saw Pinks trying to imitate the idea with her own regular balloons.
>They exploded in her face, best suicide of the game.
>Water pistol strapped to your hip to serve as your sidearm.
Check.
>The pones didn't know what to think of this one. They have a pegasus detachment for dumping rain water, but it's easy enough to avoid.
>Sock em' Bopper for close range combat.
Check.
>You never thought punching a pone could be so much fun.
>And lastly, you tighten your headband for infinite ammo.
Let's do this.
>Beginning your descent down the hill, you see a waterlogged Derpy being carted off on a stretcher.
>She knew the risks.
>A wave of panic and desperation takes the pones as the first of them see you advancing, and warns the others.
>Twilight quickly takes charge of the situation, and forces them into rank.
>There will be time for to grieve for the fallen, but now is the time for action.
>As the pones begin marching to meet you, you lob a few more balloons trying to force them to scatter.
>A quick magical barrier is erected, stopping your attempt short.
Cheating bitch, I call hax...
>Fine, if that's the way they want it.
>Breaking into a sprint, you lock eyes with the leader of the oncoming storm, Twilight, and sound a warcry.
>You do not fear the setting sun.
>These pones shall see hell this day.

>Be Lyra, and be a bit aroused.
>Anon just looks so cool making his final charge.
>The remaining pegasi still with your group take to the sky, and close in on his position.
>Rainbow Dash zigzags her way up to him staying close to the ground, but at the last second as Anon pulls back his booper, she shoots vertically into the sky.
>You see his eyes widen in realization before he tosses a balloon straight up and dives forward.
>Time seems to slow as he turns in mid air, draws his water shooter, and squirts the sneaking Fluttershy in the face, all before his balloon hits the ground and soaks Flitter and Cloudchaser as they land on either flank of where he just stood.
>You can't help but squeal like a fangirl at such a display.
>Twilight gives you a glare as Rainbow lands to report her losses.
>"He... He saw right through it Twilight... He got Shy, we can't just leave her laying out there!"
>Applejack puts a comforting hoof on her, and gives a determined look.
>"And we sure as shoot won't, Sugar. Big Mac, BonBon, yer with me. RD, you get above em' and wait for mah signal. Twi, and Lyra, ah need you to follow at a distance an' cover our rears. We're endin this!"
>You all nod with new resolve.
>"We're with you Applejack."
>"Then let's move!"

>Be Anon again.
>Standing up, you look to the dripping pegasi sitting by you.
>"Darnit, we were so close!"
Haha, yeah you almost got me"
>Giving Flitter a pat on the head, you pull out a towel for them to dry off.
>"T-thanks, Anon."
>Smiling down at Flutters, you turn to assess the situation.
>Dash is nowhere to be seen, but the rest seem to be marching towards you with a glint of steel in their eyes.
Alright, let's get dangerous.
>Meeting them halfway, you grin smugly at the last of the opposing army.
Well well, and here I thought the great Equestrian Army would be a bit of a challenge. Guess I was wrong.
>Glaring at you in defiance, the pones grit their teeth.
>"This fight ain't over yet, partner. Never make the mistake of underistimatin' an Apple."
>"Eeeeyup."
>Looking to the weakest link, you try to appeal to her common sense.
BonBon... Is this really worth it? There's no light at the end of the tunnel for any of you. Just give it up.
>She gives you a weary smile. This one's seen some shit.
>"We both know that it's too late for that, Anonymous."
>You smile gently back, and nod to her. You know when an opponent is to be respected.
This is your last chance. Surrender, and your demise will be quick.
>Applejack smirks at you, turning your smile into a frown.
>"Funny. Ah was about ta' say the same thing. RD NOW!"
>SHIT

>Whipping your head around, you try to ascertain where the threat is coming from.
>There!
>Diving at you from a cloud directly over your position, she's almost on top of you before you notice.
>She's fast, but not fast enough.
SH-SHORYUUKEN!
>Twisting in the air, your bopper connects with her face.
>You land with your back turned, and tighten your headband once more as you hear the thud of a body hitting the ground.
>K.O.!
>"RD! Yer gonna pay fer that!"
>Bolts of Magic and apples start to whiz over your head as you turn and begin firing your pistol.
>Catching Big Mac in the chest with a shot while he is rearing back to toss another apple, you dive to the side to avoid a charging BonBon. But not before she manages to grip your bopper in her teeth as she passes, ripping it from your hand.
>As you land, you pull into a roll and come up with a balloon in hand.
>A Perfect throw sees it exploding against Applejack and hitting Twilight with splash damage just at she teleports to the aid of her friend.
>Aiming your pistol at Lyra with one hand, and tossing another balloon up and down with the other, you giver her a condescending grin as she squirms.
It's over, Lyra.
>"H-have mercy!"
>You laugh at her cowering form, but notice her eyes aren't looking at you.
>They're... Behind!? You forgot about BonBon!
>Turning quickly, your face meets your own Bopper, now on the hoof of the beige earth pone.
>"Boop."
...Fuck.

>And so you were driven back from the pone lands, and a new age of prosperity began under the leadership of BonBon Boopenshield.
>"So. You guys wanna get some lunch?"
Sure.
>Today was a good day.