Really Angry Anon - Part 1 (STRONG LANGUAGE WARNING)

>Wake up.
>Feel like shit. Can't remember what day it is.
>Fuck your alarm clock for note telling you the date.
>Get up.
>Realise you're in a dark forest.
>Fuck Jeremy's party and his shitty alcohol.
>Start walking.
>Leave the forest and find that everything is pastel coloured.
>Fuck, that must have been some bad acid.
>Keep walking.
>Find a village.
>What is this shit, some Amish place or something?
>No-one's around.
>Fuck these unsociable fuckers.
>Start pounding on doors.
>No one answers.
>Keep doing so until six small angry horses appear.
"What the fuck are you looking at?" You shout at them.
>Instantly, you're hoisted off the ground. You watch in horror as a rope floats towards you and ties you up.
>You fall back to the ground.
"Shitting dick nipples!" You shout, "The fuck you fuckers think you're fucking doing?"
>The purple horse walks towards you.
>"Who are you, what are you and what are you doing in P0nyville?" It asks.
>Holy shit! That fucking horse fucking spoke to you! Sounded like a chick too.
"Fuck you bitch! You fucking let me go and we'll fucking see who's gonna mess with who!"
>The horse turns her back on you.
"Hey, you listening to me bitch?"
>You're lifted off the ground again. A few minutes later, you're taken to this giant tree with a door in it.
>You're taken inside.
>It's like a library in here.
>This is some crazy shit.

>You're taken down to a basement.
>Holy shit, what is all this crap? It's like some fucking science lab or some shit.
>You're placed on a table. A number of belts appear out of nowhere and tighten themselves around you.
>This is some straight-up bullshit. Talking horses, stuff floating around, everything too colourful, this fucking sucks.
"Hey, you don't fucking let me go and you're going to have to deal with a fucking volcano when I get off this thing!"
>"Sweet Celestia, this thing doesn't shut up!"
>You look up. The blue horse with wings said that. Another chick.
"Hey, you wanna come over here and say that to my face, bitch? I'll break your fucking legs if you try that shit with me! You fucking hear me?"
>The blue horse comes over and gets in your face.
>"Oh yeah? What are you going to do about it, tough guy?"
>You cough up a lump of phlegm and spit it at the horse. She dodges out of the way.
"Two words: fuck you."
>The blue horse is looking pissed. Fuck her though, she probably hasn't gotten any dick her entire life.
>"What's your name?" The purple horse asks.
"Who's fucking asking? You ain't my fucking mum."
>"I'm asking so I can tell Princess Celestia about you."
"Well fuck your Princess, I ain't telling you shit."
>The purple horse sighs, "Fine, she'll just have to come see you herself. Girls, leave him. He's not worth the trouble."
>All six horses march out of the basement, leaving you alone.
>Fuck this.

>It took some time, but you manage to free yourself. Fuck this, fuck everything. You know you're not the greatest guy in the world but fuck those who don't treat you with some fucking respect.
>You look around the room. Those horses needed a lesson. What better way than with a good beating?
>There's nothing you can use as a weapon.
>Fuck.
>You need to get your revenge somehow. You're going to get what you want, no matter what..
>Searching through the cupboards, you find bottles filled with chemicals with symbols on them that you don't recognise.
>You can guess what they mean though.
>You open all of them and pour them out. As they mix, noxious fumes begin to fill the space.
>You kick one of the machines, causing its front panel to fall off and sparks to fly out.
>Just what you need.
>You push the machine onto the pool. Almost instantly, it flares up and a large fire is burning fiercely.
>That'll do.
>You rush up the stairs you were taken down. You try to open the door but it's locked.
>Fuck!
>You bang on the door and yell as loud as you can. You don't want to die, not like this.
>It doesn't take too long for the flames to come up the staircase. If that wasn't bad enough, the smoke is starting to suffocate you.
>Fuck it all. You hated this place the moment you got here. Might as well go out with a bang.
>At that moment, the door swings open. An orange horse is there. You push past here and make for the exit.


>The other horses are more concerned with the fire you started than they are with you escaping.
>Fuck 'em, they're getting what they deserve.
>You look behind you once you're a good enough distance away. That tree come library come science lab hellhole is burning from top to bottom. By morning, it'll be nothing but a pile of ashes.
>They deserve worse in your opinion.
>You keep walking. You find yourself back in the forest. Maybe all of this is a bad dream brought about by some bad drugs or some other shit. All you can be sure is you want this fucking nightmare to end.
>Getting hungry, you find some berries to eat. You aren't a dumb motherfucker. You made sure they were safe by watching some other stupid animals eat them first.
>You sure could go for some chocolate milk right now.
>Day fades into night. It's only now you realise you have no clue where you are or where you're going.
>Fuck.
>You definitely aren't stopping. You've got that sensation you get when your fat cougar of a boss always appears whenever you didn't want her to, which was all the time. Something's following you and you don't fucking like it.
>The Sun rises again. Your feet are fucking killing you but you're still going.
>Eventually you reach the other side of the forest. What's there to greet you? A fucking mountain, that's what.
>Fuck this.
>It doesn't take too long to find a cave. This'll do until you can come up with a plan.

>It's dark inside here. Fucking deep too. There could be wolves or something else further in that wouldn't think twice about eating you, so you stay near the entrance in case you have to run for your life to the forest.
>A loud growl comes from the treeline.
>Never-fucking-mind, you might have to run inside instead.
>You don't know what it is but trouble is spelled out all over its fucking body. It looks like a lion, only it has a scorpion's tail and bat wings.
>You're going to kill Eddy when you next meet him. Fuck him for letting you take that shit so you could experience this monstrosity.
>The lion-scorpion-bat thing spots you and roars again.
>Fuck.
>You back away into the cave. You hope there's another way you can get out.
>There isn't.
>Fucking dick muffins!
>You know this is all a dream and you'll wake up in a storm drain or some shit, but you know for a fact that once that thing gets you and tears you apart, it's going to hurt like a motherfucker.
>Might as well go out fighting like a real human being.
>You march towards the monster, fists clenched, ready to break its fucking jaw off.
>Before you get the chance, something sideswipes the creature, sending it hurtling away.
>You run out to get a better look. Standing there is a giant eagle, only it has four legs.
>Fuck, you're so messed up right now.

>"Come on! You want some of this?" The eagle thing shouts at the monster.
>Another chick. Where are all the fucking men?
>The monster looks between you and your saviour. You get the feeling it knows it couldn't take on this bird girl thing on in a one-on-one fight, so it slinks off back to the forest.
"That's right bitch, run away!" You shout at it.
>Your rescuer turns her attention toward you
>"So what's your deal then? Never seen anything like you around here before."
"I'm the one who should be asking the fucking questions. Who the fuck are you?"
>The four-legged eagle laughs.
"You think this is fucking funny?"
>"A little, nice to meet someone who isn't one of those stuck up p0nies."
"P0nies? You mean those horse things?"
>"Already met them huh?"
"Yeah. Fucking bitches. They fucking tied me up and tried asking me all these questions. Like I'm some sort of fucking tourist information or something. Got them back good though."
>"How'd you do that?" She asks, raising an eyebrow.
"Burnt that library tree place down. That'll teach them."
>The eagle begins laughing hysterically.
"What's so funny?"
>"You burnt down Twilight Sparkle's home? In P0nyville?"
"Yeah, I guess I did. Why?"
>"Lets say I've gut issues with her and her friends as well. Been trying to find a way to get some revenge of my own."
>Sounds like the p0nies are the real bullies around here.
"So what's your name then?"
>"Gilda. Gilda the Griffon. You?"
"Anonymous, Anon for short."