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- >The zebra's eyes light up once she sees who it is.
- >"It has been too long, dear Fluttershy! Tell me, why have you decided to stop by?"
- >You smile and step through the door to Zecora's cabin.
- "Twilight mentioned that you had some tea that I might like. ...It's not too forward of me to ask for some, is it?"
- >Zecora chuckles and beckons you towards a pair of chairs, a pot lightly bubbling between them.
- >"My tea is legend, is it not? As luck would have it, I just made a pot~"
- >She hums to herself and pours the pair of you some tea.
- >You inhale the fragrance and sigh.
- >It's an exotic scent, unlike anything you've ever smelt.
- >Your friend sit across from you and lightly sips on her drink.
- >"Now tell me how you have been of late, I myself have been quite great."
- >You giggle and brush your mane away from your eyes.
- "I didn't think you'd go through with it, Zecora!"
- >The zebra swells with mirth.
- >"Do not mistake me for some frail thing, my hooves can pack quite a sting."
- >She mock-jabs the air a few times.
- >"I sent that beast running for the hill, and I have to say, it was quite the thrill."
- >She chuckles again and checks her cup.
- >"Alas, my cup is empty again, could you fill it up, if that's not a pain?"
- >You happily pour her another cup of tea.
- >Sit back down and smile at Zecora.
- >She gives you her usual intense stare.
- >Zecora always seems to be searching for something when she looks at ponies.
- >Here it's no different.
- >You've long since stopped being uncomfortable though, it's just how she is.
- >Finally, she speaks, her voice dropping somewhat.
- >"Twilight tells me of your quest, Fluttershy, you know what I mean, do not lie~"
- >Cock your head.
- "My... quest?"
- 1/?
- >Zecora's smile twists into a smirk.
- >"Your ongoing quest of romantic seduction, I was wondering if you desired my instruction?"
- >Your face goes bright red.
- "O-oh, that, umm, it's going... good."
- >"Come now Fluttershy, you can tell me what's wrong, I don't want you to suffer too long."
- >Sigh in defeat.
- "Well, I've had my eye on this guy for a while."
- >Zecora smiles and motions for you to continue.
- "He's really really attractive and I k-kinda want to..."
- >Gulp.
- "Y-you know. But he's not returning my feelings and I don't know what to do."
- >Zecora nods slowly.
- >"Sometimes those we love are difficult to attract, it can take months, or years to be exact."
- "That's not very reassuring..."
- >"Worry not, my yellow friend, I am here with an ear to lend."
- "It's just that, well, I've tried dressing up, wearing make-up, showing an interest in the same things he's into, but nothing works! It's like he hates me..."
- >Zecora shakes her head.
- >"Hate is very much a powerful word, to use it so liberally is quite absurd. I'm sure your colt is simply distracted, it will have to take more to get him attracted."
- "But how? He said yesterday that the only way to get him to like me was with a fetish..."
- >Zecora stares at you, shocked.
- >Look glumly at your cup, your sad reflection looking back at you.
- >"...I may have that which you seek, but I must warn that it is not for the meek."
- >Glance up.
- "You can help me?"
- >"There is indeed a fetish you can employ, but it is dangerous, and is want to destroy."
- "Oh. Sorry, but that doesn't sound like something helpful, Zecora."
- >Your friend stands up, a determined look on her face.
- >"If a fetish is what it will take for your joy, then a fetish is what we must deploy."
- >She beckons for you to follow her.
- >You trot behind her as she moves over to a tough looking chest in a dark corner of the hut.
- >The mare gives it an apprehensive look.
- 2/?
- >"The creature within a most troublesome pest, but for performing tasks it is surely the best."
- >With a swift move that makes you flinch, Zecora throws open the chest.
- >A small wooden mask with elaborate etchings and war-paint covering it lies on a satin cushion within.
- >Zecora reaches in and plucks it out, holding it up to the light with a hoof.
- >"This creature appears as a simple mask, but it shall aid you with any task. Its methods are odd and manner unkind, though it will help you out of your bind."
- >The zebra gives it to you.
- >"Take it with you and give it a mission; a drop of water shall seal your petition."
- >Look between the mask and Zecora.
- "R-really? This will get Anon to love me?"
- >She raises an eyebrow, clearly surprised by the mention of Anon, but nods regardless.
- >"Anonymous is a stubborn man, but this fetish shall make him your fan."
- "Oh."
- >You look at the mask again.
- >A dark sense of dread washes over you as you stare into the hollow eyes.
- >Ancient tribal markings cover its surface, and you shudder to imagine the depravity of whatever magics conjured such a thing into existence.
- >In the back of your mind a voice tells you that this is a bad idea, that you should turn back before you tamper with powers far beyond your control.
- >...
- >Then again, this thing could get you laid.
- "Yaaay!"
- >Slam your front door shut.
- >Scamper up the stairs of your cottage.
- >You pass Angel on the way up.
- >He points at his tummy.
- "Not now, Angel! Mommy's dealing with ancient tribal spirits!"
- >The rabbit rolls his eyes.
- >Slam your bedroom door shut and cast the mask onto your bed.
- >Silence reigns.
- >Wet your lips and tremble slightly.
- >So you just ask it to do something and pour water on it.
- >That's what she said, right?
- >There's no way this can go wrong.
- >Zecora wouldn't give you an extremely dangerous magical artefact from a time-lost age, would she?
- >...No, she's a good friend.
- 3/?
- >Nodding to reassure yourself, you clear your throat, your most confident voice addressing the object.
- "Um, h-hello... I-I'm Fluttershy, um, could you maybe get Anon to love me? He said he needs a fetish to make him love me so... yeah..."
- >Fumbling with your hooves slightly, you gently pour a glass of water onto the mask's face.
- >Step back and eagerly await the fireworks.
- >Nothing seems to happen for a moment.
- >Until the mask sprouts legs and stands up.
- >"OOGA."
- "EEK!"
- >Trip over yourself backwards as you try to scramble away from the creature.
- >Arms quickly follow the legs, and soon the mask has a tiny body.
- >It flexes and lets out a satisfied groan.
- >"Yellow horny lady want wish granted. Me do."
- >Blink and stand up, cautiously approaching the mask.
- >It just stands there, swinging its arms and waiting for you to stop being such a coward.
- >"Yellow horny lady slow. Hurry hurry."
- "Um, my name is Fluttershy."
- >"Fluttyshy horny yellow lady."
- "W-well I'm not -that- horny! This is about love, not sex!"
- >The fetish stops swinging its arms.
- >"...Yellow horny lady stupid. Me done this many time."
- >Cock your head.
- "You've done this before? ...and I'm not stupid..."
- >"Many year ago. Tribe ladies want babies. Me help them get mates. Me done this many time."
- "Oh! So you have experience! How wonderful!"
- >"Yes yes. Stupid horny yellow lady smart. We go now. Get you baby. Yes?"
- "Y-yes please."
- >The fetish jumps off the bed.
- >It stands no higher than your front knees.
- >Said mask peers up at you, its eyes still hollow.
- >The voice behind it speaks up again.
- >"We go now. Take me to baby-maker home."
- "H-he's called Anon, actually."
- >"Name not important. He only good for making baby. He fill you with many baby."
- "I'm not really sure if we can actually have babies--"
- >"No baby then. Only fun time."
- "Y-yes, fun time, sure."
- >With that, you reach down and carefully pick the mask up.
- 4/?
- >It uses your mane as a ladder and climbs onto you, riding on your back.
- >"This remind me of old days."
- "Really?"
- >"Yes. Many baby."
- >You blush once you realise what it's getting at.
- >Trot out of your room and towards the front door, calling out into the house as you go.
- "Angel, sweetie? Mommy's going to go use this potentially dangerous zebra magic to get laid! Carrots are in the fridge, don't stay up too late!"
- >Angel scowls at you as you happily bound out the house.
- "Here we are!"
- >The fetish looks around.
- >"Place too green. No flatland."
- "Flatland?"
- >"Old place had flatland. Lots of dust."
- "Aww, do you miss your home?"
- >"Lots of lion chasing zebra. Lots of lion eating zebra."
- "Wh-- That sounds horrible!"
- >"Yes. But then lion mate with zebra. Good times follow."
- "...Oh."
- >"Me see many things. Lewd things."
- >Crack a smile.
- >This can't fail.
- "Alright, here we go."
- >You start to walk down the hill towards Anon's house.
- >It's a pleasant little place by Ponyville lake.
- >Nice and out of the way, just how he likes it.
- >Stride up to the front door and knock on it a few times.
- "So um, when he mates with me, do you stop being alive?"
- >"Yes."
- "Right, right, um, so you won't watch?"
- >"I watch."
- "Please don't."
- >"I watch. Make sure deal done."
- >You blush slightly.
- "Well don't get too cl--"
- >The door opens.
- >"Oh Jesus Christ, Fluttershy."
- "Hello, Anon!"
- >The human rubs his eyes and checks his watch.
- >"I'll admit it, I like that you gave me time to actually eat lunch today, but I'm still pissed that you're here. Now go away, I don't care about whatever you're about to say."
- "But Anon! I found a fetish!"
- >"...What?"
- "Last week you told me that the only way to make you love me was if I found a fetish!"
- >"Guess, Fluttershy. If you -guess- my fetish."
- >He gives you a cautious look.
- >"...Why, what did you do?"
- >The mask leaps off your back and onto your head.
- >He jabs a tiny finger at Anon.
- 5/?
- >"Big monkey thing! You mate with stupid horny yellow lady!"
- >Anon stares at the fetish for a very long time.
- >You wait for him to rip his shirt off and start sucking your face.
- >Should happen any second now.
- >...
- >Instead, he starts laughing.
- >"What the fu-- what the fuck -is- that?! Fluttershy, what the hell have you done?!"
- >You feel your cheeks flush red from embarrassment.
- "I-it's a fetish! I got it... for you..."
- >You lower your head and try to block out his laughing.
- >The human wipes a tear from his eye and steps back into the house.
- >"A for effort, Shy, but you still need to get off my property."
- >He slams the door.
- >Once he does, you hear a knocking on your skull.
- >The fetish is rapping his knuckles against it.
- >"Stupid horny yellow lady. We go. Make plan."
- >"Big monkey thing bigger than me think. Have to think bigger."
- "Think bigger?"
- >"Very bigger."
- >You watch with mild amusement as the fetish paces around in the bush at the top of the hill overlooking Anon's house.
- >Your usual spying spot.
- >The grass even has a you-shaped crater in it.
- >He makes a frustrated noise and bangs his little fists on his face.
- >Then snaps his fingers.
- >"Me have plan. Stallion like big mare bits."
- "They do?"
- >"Yes. Me make you bigger. Have bigger mare bits. Big monkey thing want you."
- >He nods.
- >"Good plan."
- "I think so? How do we make me bigger though?"
- >The fetish cracks his knuckles.
- >"Me good with hands."
- >He waggles his fingers and performs a funny little dance, making grunts and other high-pitched tribal noises.
- >Once he does a full spin, he points a single finger at you.
- >Lightning bursts from his fingertip and slams into you.
- >Your vision goes white for a moment, and an intense pain grips your whole body.
- >Writhing around on the floor, you feel yourself growing sluggish.
- >It's almost constricting.
- >To your shock though, you see that the bush around you is getting smaller.
- 6/?
- >Scramble to jump out of it and into the clearing.
- >Your body bubbles and churns as it grows to a huge size.
- >Soon you're as large as a house.
- >Blink a few times and look at yourself.
- >You tower over everything now.
- >Squinting, you see the fetish dancing around beneath you.
- >Lean down and try to hear what he's saying.
- >"Me make you big! Go get big monkey thing! Have big fun time!"
- >Grinning, you look towards the now much smaller house.
- "This is going to be perfect!"
- >Bound down the hill and land with a thunderous crash outside Anon's front door.
- >The ground trembles slightly from the impact.
- >A top window opens and Anon's head pokes out.
- >"Who the-- FLUTTERSHY WHAT."
- >You get down on eye-level with him.
- "Hello again! S-so I'm bigger now!"
- >He opens his mouth to speak, then shuts it again.
- >"Well, I mean, yeah, you are. But why and how? Mostly why?"
- "I know you like larger mares--"
- >"I don't."
- "--So I made myself the biggest mare around!"
- >"I'm not seeing the appeal, honestly."
- "Oh? Well what if I do -this-?"
- >You quickly turn around and press your rear end against his house.
- >Because you completely cover his window, you can only hear his muffled screams inside.
- >' DEAR GOD ALL I SEE IS MEAT. '
- "D-do you like it, Anon?"
- >' HOW ARE YOU SO MOIST-- IT'S GETTING ON THE CARPET. IT'S GETTING ON THE FUCKING CARPET. '
- "Maybe y-you should try licking it up~"
- >' STOP GETTING INTO IT, YOU'RE ONLY MAKING IT WORSE IN HERE, JESUS FUCK WHERE ARE MY BOOTS AND RAINCOAT?! '
- "You should get into me instead."
- >Giggle to yourself.
- >This is kinda fun.
- >' NO! NOT MY BED! I'D JUST CHANGED IT! '
- >...Perhaps this wasn't wise.
- >' IT'S IN MY EYES. AM I BLIND? OH GOD I'M BLIND. '
- >Yeah, this isn't working.
- >' SOME GOT IN MY MOUTH. '
- >You should probably go.
- >' AUUUUUGHHH! '
- >"Big monkey thing don't like big mare. He stupid."
- >The fetish sits on your head, staring at Anon's house.
- 7/?
- >You're back to your regular size.
- >You can see the area of house you were pushed up against.
- >It's glistening in the sun.
- >"We try new plan. You good with animal, yes?"
- "Yes?"
- >"Good. We try animal."
- "Oh okay."
- >...
- "Wait what do you mean 'try animal'?"
- >Too late; with a waggle of his fingers and a flash of lightning, you feel your body transform again.
- >Shutting your eyes, you wait for it to be over.
- >Once you open them, you look down at your webbed feet in sadness.
- >"You sexy now. Go get mate."
- >You croak internally.
- >Knock on the door.
- >Anon opens it.
- >Then shuts it.
- >Then opens it again.
- >"This is really happening, isn't it?"
- "Ribbit."
- >"Well fuck. I honestly have no idea what to say."
- >You blink each eye one at a time and extend your extremely dexterous tongue.
- >Stroke Anon's face with it.
- >He doesn't react.
- >"I don't know what sort of fucked up magic Twilight is experimenting with today, but this isn't productive. Or sane."
- "Rrrrribbit."
- >"Perfect. Can you stop licking my face?"
- >Your tongue goes limp and you drag it back into your mouth.
- >Before either of you can speak, the fetish clambers up onto your head again, wobbling slightly because of your oily skin.
- >"Big stupid monkey thing not appreciate beauty of frog pony!"
- >Anon looks down, unimpressed.
- >"Tiny stupid mask annoying."
- >The fetish fumes.
- >"YOU PAY FOR THIS!"
- >With a snap of his fingers, the lake next to Anon's house starts to bubble.
- >Your oversized eyes widen as a tidal wave of frogs surges forth from the depths.
- >Anon barely has time to slam his front door before his house is mobbed by an amphibious surge.
- >The frogs break his windows and stream into his home.
- >You hear screaming from inside.
- >Watch the scene unfold, transfixed.
- >Anon bursts from his backdoor, covered head to foot in frogs, which are latched onto his clothes and ribbiting aggressively.
- >It's beautiful, in a way.
- >You shed a tear from the majesty of it all.
- 8/?
- >Then lick your right eyeball.
- >The fetish chortles.
- >Anon wails.
- >"Big monkey hard to beat."
- >Unf.
- >"We need new plan. Think smart."
- "M-maybe don't transform me this time..."
- >The fetish waves its hand dismissively.
- >"Horny yellow lady not understand beauty of giant pony."
- >He places his minuscule hands on his hips and stares at Anon's house from your safety bush.
- >Anon is outside, nailing boards over his shattered windows.
- >He's also still covered in slime.
- >The fetish muses to itself before snapping its fingers again.
- >Something you've learnt to be afraid of.
- >"Perfect plan. Will not fail."
- "Could you run it by me first? I don't want to do anything too over the top..."
- >Finish nailing the last board to the window.
- >Wipe your forehead with a hand and sigh.
- >You're gonna find Fluttershy once this is over and brutalise her.
- >Decide to sit down and have something to drink.
- >Perch yourself on your front doorstep and gulp down your glass of water.
- >Think to yourself for a moment.
- >Does Town Hall do restraining orders?
- >Before you can remember, the ground in front of you bursts open.
- >A rotting, mangled hand reaches out, followed shortly by a familiar, equally as decayed face.
- >"AAAAAANNNOOOOOOOOOOON!"
- "MOM?!"
- >"REEEEEEEEE!"
- >Screaming like a banshee, your mother's corpse drags itself from whatever hell it came from and starts chasing you around your front garden.
- >She's still wearing her pearl necklace and favourite dress.
- >The ghoul shrieks and tries to flay your skin with huge jagged claws on the ends of her hands.
- >All you can do is cry like a girl at what's happening.
- >Watch in stunned silence as Anon is hunted by some nightmarish creature.
- >The fetish giggles.
- "Wh-why?"
- >"He scared. He learn from this."
- "Learn what?"
- >"Respect."
- "And how does this relate to me?"
- >"He have respect for life. You go down there. Reassure him. Then fun times."
- "Oh! I understand! But, what about the zombie?"
- 9/?
- >The fetish snaps his fingers.
- >With a loud splat and a spray of gore, the fiend explodes.
- >Anon drops to his knees and curses at the sky, his fists gripping a blood-soaked pearl necklace and a bit of torn dress.
- >...
- >Humming happily, you prance down the hill to comfort him.
- "Hello, Anon! Want a hug?"
- >Anon tackles you backwards, his hands around your neck.
- >Close, but you'll take it.
- >"GOD DAMN HORSE WHAT DID YOU DO WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON MY IS MY MOTHER--"
- "AnonPleaseICan'tBreath--"
- >"--FUCKING YELLOW SHITTER I'LL END EVERYTHING YOU LOVE WHY ARE YOU EVEN ALIVE--"
- >Oh.
- >He seems upset.
- >Did you come on too strongly?
- >Ponder this while the corners of your vision go dark.
- >Before Anon can crush your windpipe, the fetish crawls up onto his shoulder.
- >He stops, head twisted to look at the tiny mask creature stood next to him.
- >You both wait for the fetish to do something.
- >Without waiting for either of you to do anything, the hellion cracks his knuckles and pokes Anon's face.
- >After a second, Anon lets go of you.
- >He's trembling.
- >Stand up, rubbing your neck.
- >The fetish jumps off Anon and climbs onto you once more.
- >The pair of you watch in silence as the human falls on his ass, a thousand yard stare his only expression.
- >His mouth hangs open.
- >The man's eyes are vacant, staring at some unseen horror.
- "Umm, Anon? Sweetie? Are you okay?"
- >Turn your head slightly to the fetish.
- "What did you do?"
- >"He see worst fears."
- "Oh. Why didn't you do this before?"
- >"Thought yellow lady was fine."
- "I think he was going to kill me."
- >"Death is temporary."
- "O-oh, um, right."
- >...
- "So he's not moving, is he?"
- >"No."
- >You look around.
- >Then back at Anon.
- >Then at Anon's house.
- "...Lend me a hoof."
- >Anon lies in his bed, staring at the ceiling, mouth still hanging open.
- >You sigh and cling to him, rubbing his chest.
- "You were amazing, Anon~"
- >He doesn't respond.
- 10/?
- >The fetish, which was sat at the foot of the bed the whole time, nods.
- >"This good. You win."
- "I do?"
- >"Yes. The contract is completed. I go now."
- "Oh... Will I ever see you again?"
- >"If horny yellow lady want job doing, yes."
- "R-right, of course."
- >The fetish nods.
- >Then crumples, its body disappearing.
- >All that's left is the mask.
- >You bask in the silence.
- >It's a beautiful sunny day outside.
- >You're in bed with the one you love.
- >And you're mostly sure that he loves you back.
- >Squeeze him just to make sure.
- "I love you, Anon!"
- >He lets out a slight squeak.
- >Yeah, he definitely loves you.
- >Giggle and cuddle up to him a bit harder.
- >You wish he was a bit more cooperative during your love making, but this was nice...
- >...
- >...Suppose it could be more lively.
- >Anon just needs motivating...
- >...
- >Glance at the foot of the bed.
- >Chew your lip.
- >...
- "W-wait here, Anon."
- >Slide out of bed.
- "I'm just gonna get a glass of water."
- 11/11
- The End.
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