Advertisement
Not a member of Pastebin yet?
Sign Up,
it unlocks many cool features!
- >Don't have fluffy ponies.
- >Don't really hate them.
- >Just don't want to put up with the bullshit.
- >Neighbor has three fluffies.
- >You DO hate those three.
- >Noisiest fluffy ponies you've ever seen.
- >Neighbor leaves them outside in his fenced yard all day.
- >They laugh as they play.
- >They cry when they get hurt.
- >They squeal as they chase each-other around the yard.
- >They are never quiet.
- >Not just being anal...you've met other fluffies and they're not this loud.
- >You've tried to live with it.
- >Went outside, tried to get them to play quiet games.
- >What's wrong with hide and seek?
- >Fluffy ponies somehow make even that into a loud game.
- >Ask neighbor to keep them inside during the day.
- >He thinks that would be cruel to the fluffies.
- >Dumbass.
- >You're not just being an asshole.
- >You work at night.
- >You have every bit as much right to sleep as anyone else.
- >You have to take this into your own hands.
- >Operation Silence Fluffies.
- >Go to the costume shop.
- >Rent human sized fluffy pony suit.
- >It's not very convincing, but fluffies are epically stupid.
- >Cook up treats.
- >Spaghetti, but with meatsauce.
- >Meat is not good for fluffy pony digestion.
- >They'll eat it because they're dumb though.
- >Go out to back yard.
- >Stupid neighbor fluffies run to fence happily.
- >"New fwiend?" "Pway!"
- "No...no pway. Haf nummies!"
- >Emmulate their stupid fluffy speech patterns.
- >Fluffies cheer and hop around in excitement.
- >"Yay! New fwiend gif nummies!"
- >Hand plate of spaghetti over fence.
- >Neighbor's fluffy ponies gobble it down, meat & all.
- Visit every day that week...
- >Gradually introduce more meat into their mid-day meal.
- >Meat makes fluffy pony shit reek.
- >Mid day treats ruin fluffy appetite for nutritious food owner gives them.
- >Neighbor is confused and angry when fluffy ponies don't eat.
- >"Why aren't you eating your oats?"
- >"Fwuffies not hungwy fo' mowe nummies."
- >"Have you been taking treats from stranger humans?"
- >Fluffies recoil in fear. "No stwangers!"
- >"Then who's giving you food?"
- >"Fwiend fwuffy gif good nummies!"
- >Neighbor is confused...doesn't believe fluffies.
- >Suit rental was a good idea.
- >Neighbor begins keeping fluffy ponies inside.
- >That won't stop your evil plan.
- >Know where he keeps emergency key.
- >Slip in once a day while he's at work.
- >Continue feeding fluffy ponies.
- >Introduce something new.
- >Butt-Flo Fluffy Pony Laxative.
- >Just a few drops.
- >This, combined with meat in their diets will make neighbor's house smell horrendous.
- >Wait until nightfall.
- >Hear angry yelling, crying fluffy ponies.
- >Fluffies overflowed the litter box.
- >Crapped on the floor too.
- >Meat has made their feces stink horribly.
- >Continue the assault.
- >In three days; success.
- >See neighbor carrying box out to car.
- >Plaintive crying from inside.
- >"Sowwee daddy!" "Pwease don' sent fwuffy away!" "Sowwee fow poopies!"
- >Neighbor says nothing.
- >Comes back later without box.
- >Hear later; he dropped them off at the worst fluffy pony shelter in town.
- >Sweet sweet silence.
- >You can finally sleep.
- >Productivity increases at work.
- >Raises, promotions.
- >everythingwentbetterthanexpected.
Advertisement
Add Comment
Please, Sign In to add comment
Advertisement