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- > "No pooping outside the litter box, ever."
- > "No peeing outside the litter box, ever."
- > "You do not cry, or say sorry, you should be thankful for spankings. They help you learn."
- > "You must bow when a superior enters the room"
- > How to bow, proper fluffy speech, you may not leave till dismissed, you may not act till given the word, you must comply with every order
- > Today's lesson is proper canter and keeping your tux on
- > The small fluffy is unable to wear any clothing due to the thick fluff
- > Instead he has a little white collar and black bowtie
- > "Now try again"
- > Bowing with his tail partially raised but still covering his backend, his eyes closed, right foot forward, left foot under and back legs partially bent
- > It's not comfortable but the fluffy holds the bow for a full minute
- > "Good, now show me your trot. Retrieve the blue ball for me"
- > No longer a waddle the fluffies head remains level and his tail bobs up and down as he gracefully walks towards the ball
- > Stopping he lowers his head and keeps the rest of his body ridged
- > Then he raises his head turns in place and trots back
- > "Very good, now show me the canter and return the ball"
- > Silently he picks the ball back up, turns around, and begins the canter
- > Half hopping half jumping he raises his right front and back left leg
- > Then mid hop places them on the floor and raises the other legs
- > Keeping his balance takes all his concentration but after two weeks of practice the fluffy manages to successfully canter there and back without incident
- > A small smile on his face he silently stands at attention waiting for a command
- > Up until yesterday he would look at Dulcett and wag his tail whenever he did something right
- > "You may relax, very good work today"
- > Breathing a deep sigh the fluffy cheers and wags his tail smiling and speaking
- > "Fankoo fow de wessons mistaw Duwwsset! Monty cantaw suu pwetty today!"
- > "Indeed, you can relax and play for the rest of the day. But, remember if the master comes in you must bow and behave yourself!"
- > "Yes siw! Monty be good fow mastah! ooh... esscuussme mista Duwwcet Monty haffta use waffatowy!"
- > The "lavatory" is an enclosed litter box that automatically cleans itself
- > At first the fluffy refused to even go near the spherical litter box thinking it was a "scawy dawk sowwy box!"
- > After a liberal spanking he overcame his fear and has had no incidents since
- > Dulcett smiles, his lessons are working well
- > Monty's vocabulary, mannerism, and attitude have all improved by leaps and bounds
- > Whenever he enters Monty drops whatever he is doing even mid poop and attempts to bow
- > Then he stands at attention till given a command
- > The plan is coming together
- > In another week Dulcett gives Monty a small metal crest on his collar
- > "Congratulations Monty, you're now a full fledged member of the house staff."
- > "Iss an honow"
- > Even the master is impressed by the little fluff ball
- > Over the next few days Monty's duties are largely restricted to being cute and keeping his saferoom clean
- > Then Monty is called into the office
- > He trots in after gently knocking
- > And stands at attention silently while the Master writes behind his desk
- > After a few minutes the master looks up and places his pen down
- > "Fluffy, I have an important job for you"
- > "Anyfing mastaw, fwuffy is at yow dispowsaw"
- > The man stands up and walks towards a large pane window gazing over the large lawn
- > "I have a guest coming soon, but I have to leave for a few days"
- > The fluffy doesn't move an inch
- > "His name is also Monty, but he's a human. My father’s brother"
- > "I have to go on business, but I need you to watch the house and take care of him"
- > "Fwuffy unda stan, watch da howse an make suwe Mastah Monty is comfowtabwe"
- > Silently the Master chuckles
- > This could actually work
- > A day later he leaves, "Ensure that my uncle is comfortable fluffy"
- > "Haff a good twip mastah"
- > The fluffy bows as the Master and Dulcett leave
- > They enter the car and drive to the back of the house
- > And wait for Monty to arrive in a few minutes
- > His cherry red viper thunders down the drive way
- > And skids to a halt in front of the mansion
- > A short, round, and sweaty man steps out of the sports car
- > A well chewed cigar in his lips he spits out the butt into the lawn and steps towards the door
- > "HEEEEEY CHESTER! UNCLE MONTY'S HERE!!"
- > His fat fist pounds on the door rattling a gold wrist watch
- > Two butlers pull open the large door and a line of staff awaits him in the lobby
- > Then the fluffy canters down the line and stands before the short man
- > "What the fuck..."
- > "Gweetings mastah Monty, on behawf of da houwse we wewcome yuu'"
- > He bows with the whole staff
- > Monty is speechless
- > Another staff member takes the bags and stands alongside the fluffy
- > "Pwease fowwow fwuffy tu youw woom"
- > Standing in the doorway staff dead pan and a fluffy waiting for him
- > "Maaan Chester has some weird ass taste..."
- > The three walk through the corridors silently
- > The human Monty bewildered as to the strange state of affairs
- > As they reach the door he speaks up
- > "So uh... where's your daddy?"
- > "Fwuffy nuu haff daddy, fwuffy membew of howse stahf"
- > "Da mastah an mistaw Dewwsset weave on bizzyness dis mownin"
- > "Dey esspwess deiw sincewe apowwogees"
- > Still stunned by the fluffy butler Monty enters his room without question
- > This continues for the rest of the day
- > Whenever Monty calls for service the fluffy greets him and fulfills his orders
- > Everything is going well
- > Monty's vulgarities and foul language aside
- > Until after dinner when Monty asks for a "rub"
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