AiE: You Can't Spell Friend Without Fiend Chapter 7

> That really could have gone better.
> Why do ultimatums always work seem to work in the girls favor?
> You’re a smart guy with simple tastes. And you’re decidedly stubborn with your decision making. You probably could’ve thought it all through but instead you went with idea number one just to speed up the process.
> End result? Luna’s up and left you and if you didn’t need a stiff drink before, you sure as hell did now.
> Getting back up to your feet you dust yourself off and clear your face of any would be tears before you return to the party and act as if nothing’s happened.
> The clatter of a chair being moved at a nearby table however draws your attention.
“Who’s there?” You shout out in the direction you heard the noise come from.
> From under the table a brown Stetson hat emerges with guilty looking Applejack trying to avoid looking directly at you.
“AJ? What were ya doin' under there? How much did you hear?”
> “Aw shoot, we’ll I caint lie Anon, I heard it all.”
> Fuck, this could ruin everything before it even starts for Luna, and you.
> Of course you still cared more for someone else than yourself.
“Alright, but why were ya hidin’ huh?”
> “Well twilight ran off to her house to look up something about language berries or somethin’ and she asked me to keep an eye on ya. Y’all looked to be doin’ fine until I saw ya walk up to Princess Luna. Then I saw y’all gettin’ smooth and just as I was gonna leave ya to it is when things turned south and I just couldn’t help mahself. I’m awful sorry for peepin’ on ya, 'specially after we just met today.” She hangs her head in shame.
> You want to be mad at her but something about these ponies just warms your heart. Still you got to handle things before they get out of control.
“AJ, I can’t say ain’t mad at ya, but right now I need to worry about Luna, if I promise to tell you the truth about what happened with me and her will you keep this a secret? I don’t want Luna to get in trouble for any of this.”
> “Consarnit Anon, I ain’t good with secrets but I can tell how much this means to ya. I promise.”
“Good. I’ll tell you later though for now I think it’s best we get back to the party so we don’t raise any suspicion.”
> And with that you make your way back to the party with AJ in tow.
> Luna apparently had the same idea after your encounter and has moved by her sister’s side while they speak to several ponies.
> It’s best not to make a scene though so you decide to just hang around with AJ and her friends sans Twilight who still hasn’t come back.
> They all insist on hearing about how you even came to Equestria if you weren’t some creature that Nightmare summoned. This lead to shocked disbelief and some kind words even though you were mostly over it. You left out quite a bit of your moon shenanigans even though you still owe it to AJ to tell her, but that can wait.
>You learn about the farm AJ lives and works on, and how she’d be willing to pay for a helping hand if you we’re up to it since you had a construction background. You told her you’d be up for anything that didn’t involve hay, especially after the sandwich incident.
> Pinkie invited you to come eat breakfast at the bakery she works at so you can get to know each other better. You told her that you could make chocolate chip pancakes that would knock her socks off, which causes pinkie to blush? You get an odd look at the mention of socks but you don’t pursue it and the others leave it alone.
> Rarity told you about her boutique and insisted that if you we’re going to come visit that you bathe first and let her fix up the “rags” you were wearing. When you told her that you changed clothes every day (Usually, if the jeans aren’t stained, they’re still considered clean to you) she insisted that you let her suit you up. Guess you’ll be taking that job at Sweet Apple Acre’s sooner than you thought.
> Fluttershy ran an animal sanctuary apparently, at least that would be the best way to condense what she told you. She was pretty talkative when it came to her animals especially after you showed her a picture of you and your husky you had in your wallet.
> For all the bad memories you had of Earth, it was nice to see those old pictures in your wallet.
> She was even very comforting after looking at the picture you realized you’d never see that big happy goofball of a dog again.
>You really hope whatever happened to him was quick and painless.
> Rainbow Dash, along with a bunch of other pegasi were part of the weather team, which after befriending a moon goddess and standing up to face a sun goddess, wasn’t terribly impressive to you, still helped put things into perspective. P0nies run this shit.
> Alas, all good parties come to an end and as the sun starts to set over the horizon everyp0ny as they like to say here gets their goodbyes and goodnights in. Apparently in the entire fracas no one considered where you were going to be staying. You figured twilight’s but when you realized you had no idea where that was anyways, Rarity in all her generosity offered to let you spend the night at her place so you could get a bath in and so she could inspect your clothes.
> Win-win.
> Or so you thought. Rarity had a luxurious bathroom space but you quickly realized for all of its splendor, it was still pony sized. This was to be expected after almost knocking yourself out on the door frame. Still you had room enough to keep your legs stretched out straight even if the water only just passed your belly button.
> Besides men take showers, which you’ll apparently be the inventor of here.
> For now however, you we’re gonna wash all the grime and dust off from the last week and change.
> Exiting the bath in a beach towel rarity took out of storage for you to use since pony towels didn’t quite wrap around your monkey ass, you spot Rarity levitating your clothes and in mid knock.
> “Oh my! Anonymous you scared me. It took several washes but I removed the stench from your clothes and I do hope you enjoy the lilac scented soap I used.
> You grab your wife beater from the air and take in the sweet flowery scent.
> This place is so close to gay you could practically hear the lisps.
> Still of all the flowers you knew anything about, lilac was one of your favorites.
“It smells divine miss Rarity. I haven’t seen my clothes this clean since I bought ‘em, thank ya kindly.”
> “Oh it was nothing darling; I’ll show you to your room for now so you can get changed. It’s been quite exciting here recently.” She says with a yawn.
> Opening two doors across from each other she points a hoof at the one on the left and floats your clothing through its doorway.
> “You can stay in the guest room for now. I’ll be right across the hall should you need anything. Sleep tight Anonymous.”
“Pleasant dreams Miss Rarity.” You reply as you walk in and close the door behind you.
> Entering the room you slip into your boxers and tank top. Before lying down in bed.
> Great. After the tub thing THIS should’ve been more obvious to you. Pony beds are laughably small, especially with how your legs dangle of the end well above your knee joint.
> With a sigh you grab the pillow and blanket off it and make do with sleeping on the carpeted floor. At least it’s better than moon dirt.
> Thank God for those warm summer nights you think to yourself before you fall asleep on your second day in Equestria.

End Chapter 7