The Writer Won't Let Me Scream

>"Come on, Anon! If we don't hurry the Cake's are going to run out of donuts!"
>Your name wasn't Anon
>...Or was it?
>You remember a thousand different names
>Michael, Mark, Antaeus, John, Incognito, Anny, Bob, Matthew, REDACTED, and Anon to name a few
>Anon...
>AnonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonALWAYSanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanon
"I'm coming, Twi! And you don't need to run, you silly horse! They'll have plenty of donuts when we get there."
>Your friend, Twilight Sparkle, looked back at you and playfully rolled her eyes
>Wait
>Twilight wasn't your friend
>She banished you from Ponyville
>She ran her horn through your chest
>She starved you, killed you, tortured you in ways too horrible to describe
>You could still feel the pain
>The ripping, the cutting, the drugs
>The screaming, the begging, the crying, losing control of your bowls as pain overtook you
>You hated her
>You KILLED her
>...
>W a i t
>That isn't right either
>Twilight was your best friend
>You remember her finding you in the middle of Applejacks farm, your arm broken
>And in the middle of the forest, your arm torn to bits by a manticore
>You remember her summoning you to this place

>You remember growing up with her, son of Princess Celestia herself
>You remember taking her when your wife Celestia was away on business
>She's your wife
>You've had children with her
>W a i t
>Why did she have wings?
>She was a unicorn!
>Or was she a human?
>You also remembered a cute girl in a shirt and glasses
>Twilight smiled as you screamed in your own mind
>"Oh, you just don't want to pick up the pace, you silly stallion."
>You tried to scream, tried to stop your casual walk to hold your head to try to take away from of the PaIn, but you couldn't
>But you couldn't
>You just smiled back at her
"Well, if m'lady is in such a hurry than she can carry me if she so wishes," you heard yourself saying
>You didn't say that
>You didn't want to say that
>You wanted to scream
>Beg for help
>Beg for all of these visions, all of these stories, to end
>Anon is not your name
>You're not Anon, you have a NAME
>...
>WHAT IS YOUR NAME?!?!
>Twilight blushed as you heard yourself chuckle
>"Anon, I wouldn't be so loud when you're saying stuff like that," she muttered, shyly kicking at the dirt. "If other ponies heard you they'd start talking, and I don't want them to call you a slut..."
>You could taste bile in the back of your throat
>At the other end of the street, you could see Bonbon walking side by side with Lyra

>You remembered being married to Bonbon
>You hadn't had a name then
>It was never said
>Never written
>You remember her trying to get you to touch her butt
>The two of you had children
>Wonderful, bright-eyed children that had their mother's eyes and their old man's grin
>Two little girls, with a little boy on the way
>You hated her
>The agent that had taken you to that prison of white nothingness
>You remembered the interrogation
>What are you?
>Where are you from?
>Are there others like you?
>What business do you have in this land?
>What are your secrets?
>You've raped her
>Held her down while her friends and loved ones watched and cried and took her
>You've raped her a thousand times in a thousand different ways
>Your stomach turns as you remembered all that she did to you, to ALL of you
>Everything
>Rape, torture, love, marriage
>You recall Lyra cutting off your hands and eating them
>You also remember kissing her under an oak tree
>Her lips tasted like the wine that the two of you had drank, but far, far sweeter
>Her marehood had spasmed as you thrusted into her
>She also mocked you
>Cheated on you
>Hurt you
>Both of them did
"Aw, come on, Twiggles. It's just a bit of fun! You know that I don't mean anything by it!"

>There was something wrong with your voice
>It was... different from Twilight's somehow
>Wrong
>You could feel a pressure behind your eyes with each syllable spoken
>Who were you?
>What was your name?
>WHY WERE YOU SOME PUPPET ON A STRING?!
>AnonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonALWAYSanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanon
>"Howdy, Anon, Twilight."
>"Good morning darlings."
>Both you and Twilight looked to your left
>Rarity and Applejack were making their way toward you, smiles on their faces
>Rarity, the mare that woke up in your bed and stayed there until you were married
>Applejack, your master who had branded her cutiemark onto your thigh and gelded you
>A thousand stories flashed through your mind's eye as you looked at them
>Heaven
>Hell
>Pain
>Pleasure
>You've witnessed Rarity slicing her sister's throat
>You've done things to the cutiemark crusaders that would make a serial killer pale
>W a i t
>Did she have her cutiemark, or was she still a blank flank?
>How old was she?
>Did Equestria beat back Sombra's army?
>ANON IS NOT YOUR NAME!
>WHAT IS YOUR NAME?!
"Mornin' Applejack, mornin' Rarity," you heard yourself chirp as they stopped in front of you

>Applejack tipped her hat at you
>"So whatcha two doin' in town?" she asked. "I thought the two of ya were back at the castle working on somethin' important."
>Castle?
>No, no, no; that wasn't right
>Twilight lived in a treehouse
>No; she lived in the Everfree
>You had helped her rebuild the Sister's old castle yourself
>No; she lived in a nice little two story house three blocks down from Canterlot High
>You walked with her to school every day
>The kids driving by on the buses would always push down the windows and yell at you as they passed
>You were taller then
>Or maybe short?
>Fatter maybe?
>Was your name even Anon then?
>Your head felt so full
>It hurt
>Everything hurt
>EVERYTHING
>There was something wrong with the way that they spoke
>Why was it so different from yours?
>Why did you remember everything?
>The thousands, the millions of stores?
The millions of stories?!
>WHYWERETHEYCALLINGYOUANON?!
ANONWASN'TYOURFUCKINGNAME!"
>"Anon decided that the two of us needed some fresh air," Twilight explained as you stood there frozen, rolling her eyes as she did so. "So we both decided to go and get some donuts!"
>Claw your eyes out

>If you clawed your eyes out maybe that would take away the visions
>If you kept going maybe you could claw at your brain
"No, YOU wanted to go and get donuts," your voice teased. "Unlike SOMEONE, whose alicorn biology lets them eat anything that they want, some of us have to watch their figure."
>Figure?
>Why would you need to watch that?
>You were an alicorn yourself
>You were the brother, the protector of Celestia and Lulu
>W a i t
>No you weren't that
>You were a diamond dog
>No, a gryphon
>No, a human
>You were a human with a mask
>A human without eyes or a mouth
>A human with blue eyes and a smile that would win a princess's heart
>WHOWEREYOU?!
>WHATWASYOURNAME?!
>Rarity made a face as you tasted blood at the back of your throat
>"Oh, don't be like that, Anon. I'm positive that you'd look absolutely lovely no matter how many donuts you take," she said, raising her sewing needles to stab out your--
>"Yeah! There ain't nothin' wrong with a bit 'o fat on a colt!" Applejack said, her eyes dancing as she bumped your side with her rump
>Dagy wouldn't like that
>She and the other girls don't like any other women touching you
>Sunset was a bit different, for some reason or another, but--
"Aw, thanks girls," you heard yourself say as a blushed forced its way into your face. "You really know how to make a guy blush..."
>Hit one of them

>Scream
>Go over and bash your brains out again that building over there
>Pick up Rarity, pick up Twilight, pick up Applejack
>Pet them
>Strangle them
>Move your hand
>Do something
>Don't just sit there and smile
>I can't just sit there and smile
>I'm not Anon
>That's not my name
>>AnonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonanonALWAYSanonanon
>The others girls chuckled along with you as your hands shook
>"If you girls want to come with us I'll buy," Twilight offered, shaking a small bag of bits at them
>Applejack and Rarity exchanged glances before nodding
>"I could go for something to nibble on," Rarity admitted
>"I could eat a donut," Applejack told the unicor-- alico--gir--
>"Alright then!" Twilight chirped with a happy little hop. "Lets hurry up then! I wanna get there before the morning rush!"
>You could feel your body moving as they began to make their way down to SugarCube Corner
>Your hands shook as you struggled
>You could feel wires on your hands and feet
>They were in your mouth, in your ears
>You could feel the hot pain of metal in your brain
>You had to get them out
>You had to stop
>Do something

>Blood began to mix with the bile as you forced yourself to slow down
>You could feel a pressure on the back of your neck
>It felt like a mountain, trying to push you forward
>Unrelenting, unstoppable, uncompromising
>You forced your mouth to work
>You bite down on your tongue
>Blood began to fill your mouth
>SAY. SOMETHING.
>I. WILL. SAY. SOMETHING.
"Twilight?"
>The girls stopped, turning around to see your ramrod stiff body
>"What are you doing you silly colt?" Twilight asked. "If we don't hurry up we'll..."
>The smile on her face disappeared when she saw the blood pouring from the corners of your mouth
>I hadn't quite butten through my tongue, but I couldn't
>Not yet
>I needed say something
>Like how they did
"T-Twilight...."
>In a flash Twilight and the other girls were by your side
>Twilight had her hooves on your body
>She was trying to tug you down so you could look at her
>You--I could feel my body trying to respond to her touch
>It wanted to bend down
>To go along with the story
>Just as it had a thousand times in its thousand forms
>"Anon? What's wrong? Why are you bleeding?!"
>"Partner? What's wrong? Do ya need some help?"
>"Anonymous, dear, you're bleeding! Sit down and let us have a look at you!"
>You dug your fingernails into the palm of my hand, drawing blood
>Say something


Say. Something.
>SAY SOMETHING!
>SAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYITSAYIT!
"T-Tw..."
>I gritted my teeth
>You needed to try harder
>Push more
"I-Ili..."
>Almost there...
>You're almost there...
>I'm almost there
>Thousandth times the charm
"T-T-Twili..."
>The air shimmers
>In the back of your mind, you heard something snap
>"Twilight."



̶̡̰͍ͣ̆ͫd̳͉̦̪͇̓́͌͌͌̂ͦ̓̑͢͠e̵͉̗̲ͯ͡͡b̘̭̍ͤ͆̄͂͝ ̸̹̙͈͓̰̖̦͗̋͊̍̀̎ͧo̶͓̦͇͇̱͇̍̓͐́ͩ̾̈ͤ͆̕ẗ͔̘̼̟̲̞́ͤ̈ͭ̄ ̣̯͕̣̹̗̠̽̑͋̆͂̚͟g̴̡̭̑ͮ̍ͦ̊ͧo̸̝̙͙̽ͪ͌͟
̦̊̀ͬ͜



>"Come on, Anon! If we don't hurry the Cake's are going to run out--!... Anon? What’s wrong? Why are you crying?”