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- >Come in to work on Monday
- >Your job's pretty monotonous but you can't complain
- >Get in, head to your desk, begin slacking off
- >Typical day
- >Head to water cooler to get some exercise when you notice a peculiar site
- >At first glance it looks like a man, but on further inspection its clearly not
- >It appears to be some... thing masquerading as a man
- >You can see a skin like covering that moves like it doesn't fit right and while it appears to be talking its lips aren't moving
- >In fact, you can hear multiple voices coming from within its 'body'
- >"nee mak poopies"
- >"when we ge nummies?"
- >"fwuffy wan pway."
- >"stop moving awound. you bwow fwuffies cover!"
- >Confused, you approach the 'man'
- Excuse me.
- >The creature(s?) turns around to face you
- >You can now see that its face looks like a macabre mask of a human face, with what look like some type of fluff coming out of its mouth
- >"oh, hewwo fewwow hooman. i am awso a hooman. do you wanna do hooman stuff?"
- >"pwease giv us skettis" a voice from around the 'man's' chest cries
- >"shut up!" another voice from its neck sounds off
- >You stand there dumbfounded by the sight before you
- Who exactly are you?
- >"oh, I am fwu- fiw er a phiw, fwom accoutin'. i jus stawted today. would you wike to be fwiends?"
- Okay, I'm sorry, but this is just ridiculous. You're not a person.
- >"yes we- I is- er am. phiw is hooman."
- No, you're a bunch of fluffy ponies in a man suit.
- >"fwuffy is here!" a voice from 'phil's' crotch cries
- >"shut up! you bad fwuffy!" the neck fluffy scolds
- >"fwuffy ponies? how widicuwous. i, wike aww hoomans, hate fwuffy ponies. watch."
- >The fluffy-man shambles a bit before someone reaching into its pocket to produce a crude plush imitation of a fluffy pony
- >It then proceeds to drop it on the ground and start stomping on it with its leg (which itself was simply a fluffy pony in a shoe, so the process did not actually cause much damage)
- >"stoopid fwuffy! you usewess! hooman hate fwuffy! give big owwies!"
- >You hear a few of the voices within the suit cry at the scolding of the (literal) head fluffy
- >"wouwd you awso wike to hewp kiww bad fwuffy."
- Uh, no. Look, this is just silly. Why don't you-
- >"Anon my boy!" you are interrupted by the voice of your boss
- >You turn around and stand at attention
- Yes sir, I was just getting a drink.
- >"Calm down son, I just wanted to introduce you to our new hire Phil. He's our newest accountant."
- >"fiw good accountan'!"
- >"Now, I want you to show Phil the ropes here Anon. Now get back to work both of you."
- >"bye bye nice hooman!" 'phil' calls out as your boss walks away
- Wat.
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