Journal 1

Journal Entry 1
	/POL/ WAS RIGHT. Sort of.  The Happening had occurred, though not as anyone thought.  Apparently anyone who ever posted on /mlp/ was now a pony, appearing in Canterlot.  The first ones were deemed insane and locked up, but that changed quickly as more started appearing with the same story and materializing right in front of a few of the guards.  Needless to say, everyone lost at least some sanity waking up in a colorful world of marshmallow ponies and then realizing that they were one of them.  By the time I arrived, it had apparently been going on for a couple days, so Canterlot was getting some semblance of structure about the whole thing.  Guards came by, helping the new ones to stand up and explain the basic mechanics of walking on all fours.  During my attempt, another arrival appeared a few feet behind me and started screaming.  He would not stop, so I was left alone to fall on my face while the guards sedated him.  After that, we were rounded up and taken to the courtyard.

	Celestia addressed us from a balcony, sounding tired.  To me, she looked like a fuzzy white blob.  If the rest of the groups were like mine, I could see why she was exhausted.  Celestia was interrupted numerous times by screams of: "We don't support your rule!  Hail Luna!"  "Do you like bananas?" "Where's Princess Twiley?"  The last of which caused a brawl amongst some of the group arguing whether or not her being an alicorn now was canon.  What I was able to piece together amongst all this chaos was that we were being sent to establish a frontier town far away by train and that we would not be seeing any of the Mane Six since they were on a "diplomatic mission to another kingdom."  One of the hecklers shouted, "I didn't know you had trains TO THE MOON!" Which started another all-you-can-eat spaghetti-fest. After enough of the sperglords were mostly calmed down, we were separated into three groups dependent on race.  Apparently I'm a unicorn, so that at least is some promise.

	We were given a feather, a candle, and a pamphlet with beginner spells in it.  Oh, and a saddlebag to put them all into.  The feather was to train our telekinesis, the candle was for energy projection, and the pamphlet was mostly illegible. When asked if they had it in English, the response was, "It's written in magic.  You can use magic.  Figure it out."  Fucking know-it-alls.  They at least spent some time with us, making sure that all of us could at least lift a feather.  The magic felt like a tingling sensation mixed with the experience of being a conductor for live electric current.  Some tulpamancers realized what they had at this time and started summoning chalupas faster than lunch time at Taco Bell.  Thankfully, this did not last long as nobody was used to magic yet, but they were marked as ones for the rest of us to keep an eye on.  When asked if the magic we used was powered by feelings, desire, talent, or belief, the instructors kept silent on the matter saying that what we needed to know was in the pamphlet, and more books would be sent later on after construction of a library.  I asked about blood magic and was given a stern warning to never mention it again.

	Up until this point, nobody had seen what they looked like.  We could tell what color our coats were and gender, but that was about it.  Most of the mares were surprised that they were now female, while only a couple of the stallions were just as surprised at their own gender.  The next room we were led to had a wall on one side of it covered with mirrors.  It took everyone a few seconds to figure out which reflection was theirs.  I had a sandy coat, red mane, and green eyes.  And my vision was still the same as it was back on Earth.  At this time, I decided to test the theory that all unicorns could use basic cantrips, considering the three items given to us.  Considering we were left alone at this time, I figured it was the best time.  Not wanting to do anything too damaging if something went wrong, some simple prestidigitation was in order.  With that, I started concentrating, trying to turn my mane a different color.  Blue.  I saw it start to work in the mirror, but then it fizzled out, leaving me with a shitty looking half finished look.  After about ten minutes our guard escorts came back in and separated those needing glasses from the group.  The rest were sent to help with loading supplies onto the train.

	Upon arriving at a large tent, we were instructed to go in and wait.  I finally met up with the earth ponies and pegasai again.  I asked what their training was.  The earth ponies were taught to hold things with their mouths and the Equestiran alphabet and given a pamphlet on growing crops.  The pegasai(?) (pegasuses?) were taught wing maintenance and a pamphlet on how to control the weather.  At least the pair I was talking to didn't seem too bad, and we exchanged what we learned.   The pegasus was as blind as a bat, so after learning the alphabet, the earth pony and I took turns reading to her.  The efficiency of the optometrist tent reminded me of boot camp when I was in the Navy.  Hurry up and wait. While we waited, we exchanged what we used to do.  I was a student, after leaving my job as a nuclear electrician in the Navy, the pegasus was a NEET that lived off of welfare, collecting brony bux, and the earth pony was a semi-successful daytrader that liked to shitpost on /mlp/ to piss everyone off.  I also took the time to try and read my pamphlet.  The alphabet did help somewhat, but all I managed to be able to decipher was, "Congratulations on learning your first lesson!  The magic of teamwork!!!"  Clearly whoever wrote this was insane.  No sane person would use three exclamation points at the end of a sentence.  I asked the earth pony if he could read it, but he couldn't make heads or tails out of any of it, as it looked like the words kept shifting according to him.  Finally it was my turn to get tested, and then another hour to wait for the glasses.  And then another half hour to be grouped up and led out to help with the trains.  Military efficiency at it's finest.

	We all spent time loading up supplies.  No magic was to be used by us at this time because we weren't skilled enough for it yet, nor did we have the stamina to keep it up all day.  As the sun started to set, we were given a break for dinner.  We also got a quill, a bottle of ink, and a blank journal along with some other basic supplies for our packs while waiting in line for dinner.  People started complaining that there was no meat, we weren't given any booze, and that spaghetti was what fluffy ponies ate, not real ponies.  I also noticed that some were stuffing spaghetti into their bags.  God damned fucktards are going to try and green text in real life.  Real life.  This seems so unreal, but so natural.  For the first time in a while, I felt a since of camaraderie not felt since reentering civilian life.  And then my anxiety kicked in.  Too many people, um, ponies, all in one place.  I had to get out of there and fast.  I bolted away as fast as possible, not caring where I was headed, just to a place where nobody was at.  Apparently I made it out of the castle grounds somehow and ended up in a park nearby.  When the guards found me, I was curled up in a ball on a bench and harshly dragged back.  I did not think such colorful pastel ponies could curse like that.  I was asked what I was trying to pull, and if I was sane.  I explained about my anxiety and how it probably was due to withdrawal from my medication.  They said that they did not have enough for everypony that showed up, and generally thought the entire lot of us was insane.  I was warned not to pull a stunt like that again, since I would be on the train soon.  I was advised to think of a new name before boarding so they could put me in the census.

	After being escorted to the train, I was instructed that the only magic allowed for use on board was translation and telekinesis.  Apparently they didn't want us starting fires or having the train overrun with tulpas.  Some jokes were made in line that we were going to Auschwitz and the ponies there would give us turned humans a nice shower.  Finally, I reached the front of the line.

	"Name?"

	I stated my name.

	"No.  Not your human name, the name that you chose for yourself.  If you are devoid of creativity one will be chosen for you.  We are seeking to integrate all of you into society, so a name will have to be chosen that will not leave ponies scratching their heads."

	Thinking for a bit, I decided what I could pull off reference-wise in case I meet anyone else later on if we make it back from the frontier.  "It's Mad Stan."

	The census pony looked at me deadpan.  "You know it's not the worst name today and we don't have all night.  Seriously.  People wanting named 'ExexexVagetaFourTwenty,' 'I Want to Come Inside Rainbow Dash,' several hundred 'Anonymous,' and plays on that word, names of ponies already used, well, you get the idea.  Any special talents you have?"

	"I was a nuclear electrician in the Navy and have basic survival skills.  I also dabble in a little bit of everything."

	"New clear electrician?"

	"No.  Nu-cle-ar.  It's pronounced nu-cle-ar."  This got a few chuckles behind me as I tried my best Homer Simpson voice.

	"Whatever.  Your survival training will come in handy as you will be building a town.  Get on board, find a bunk and pass out.  Next!"  I followed instructions and did just that.