beat: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qnR46831UgI

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!!!

ROBERT! E.! LEE!

VS!

WILLIIIIAM WILBERFOOOOORCE!

BEGIN!

Robert E. Lee:

March on! To battle this limey prick who's too scared to fight the french!
Your raps are as weak as your eyesight, you can't make a dent!
I tremble for your country when I hear of confidence expressed in you;
especially with a man who would refuse to give English workers their due!
Stand in formation, Willy, and feel the wrath of Marse Robert!
You're equal under the law, but you're neither a true man nor my brother.
My status is so renowned, even Lincoln originally wanted me.
I'll whip your rear so fast, I'm channeling the spirit of Light Horse Harry Lee!

William Wilberforce:

Will you be tossed in prison like your father too?
The Lord tells me not to hate my brother, but I suppose this doesn't apply to you.
Resign after this battle; this'll be your second Gettysburg.
Beating Granny Lee is so easy I could do it without arms, legs, or a word!
You are too young to realize certain things are impossible;
but you will do them anyway, like trying to win this battle!
You rap about as well as your father in law ran his plantation;
I wouldn't be surprised to hear the dropout rate increased at the College of Washington!

Robert E. Lee:

I'm at the top of the military academy; you're just stuck in parliment!
I like whiskey, I always did, but battling you, it seems I have to drink it.
These lines I'm spitting are Wilberforceful; hitting you right in the Testonites!
You can't touch me, just like Bull Run, you'll fall under my country's might!
It took twenty years to pass the historical bill, how does one manage such a delay?
And where do you get the right to demand that I don't say fuck on a Sunday?

William Wilberforce:

Historians claim I'm hypocritical, but at least I never mocked my own country.
Not to mention that most of your family wanted nothing to with the Confederacy!
You'll always end up in second place, at West Point and the Civil War.
I've got enough material on you to use in another verse, perhaps even four score more!
I don't have time for a slave owner or a general who would take any and every recruit.
Let's take this to Appomattox Court House, but this time, you won't get a salute.