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shrimpasta

Bug Butt Filler 1

Jul 1st, 2014
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  1. >Today is not the best of your life
  2. >In fact, it might be the worst
  3. >If waking up in the middle of panic on the ground instead of your bed isn’t enough, having to fight for your life against a hydra might do it
  4. >Just to add to your confusion, all you see are technicolor ponies running around, screaming for help
  5. >Two hydra heads are currently focused on trying to eat you, because just one was having trouble
  6. >For the past ten minutes you have been running from the rampaging hydra using whatever you can find laying around to bash it in a head
  7. >The fact that one of them can breathe fire was bad enough
  8. >It’s a losing battle and you know it
  9. >Cuts and scrapes cover your body, and you are starting to feel tired
  10. >You run into a pony frozen in fear
  11. Run dammit!
  12. >You scream at the petrified pony, making it take action and start to run away
  13. >As it runs away, a bit of energy returns
  14. >You just saved a life
  15. >The feeling is quickly replaced with fear when you see a hydra head barreling towards the poor pony
  16. >Picking up the nearest thing amid the wreckage of a house- a metal bat –you run over to intercept
  17. >You barely make it in time
  18. >When the bat connects with the beast’s skull, you hear a crack
  19. Fuck
  20. >Now all eight heads are focused on you, each one full of pain and rage
  21. >Adrenaline is nothing new to your system at the moment, but a rage fueled by the desire to survive is
  22. >With a primal scream, you rush at the beast with your new weapon
  23. >A rush of strength starts to flow into you, and when a head swoops down to try and eat you, your swing crumples the skull
  24. >You don’t have time to think about how strong that swing was, because now the hydra is pissed.
  25. >You dodge one head, shatter another, and finally reach its chest
  26. >You let out another scream as another rush of energy fuels your swing
  27. >The strike connects at the chest, just below where the necks meet and passes through the ribs
  28. >The hydra wails in pain and surprise
  29. >Then the one head tries to incinerate you
  30. >Tries, because for some reason it can’t
  31. >Meanwhile, you are in a frenzy, and take another swing
  32. >Before you could, the buildup of the fire head trying to burn things finally hit the max
  33. >With a violently loud boom, the beast explodes
  34. >Chunks of rock, wood, and other things the hydra had swallowed in its frenzy are carried outwards from the explosion
  35. >Some of it hit you, but not all of it
  36. >Mainly due to the fact that you were lying high in the air, almost able to see the entire continent. It doesn’t look familiar
  37. >The debris left holes in your body, and what you can see of the world is fading fast
  38. >Before everything fades to complete darkness, you see the green land mass turn into a greyish brown land mass, and you’ve finally started to fall.
  39. So this is how I die.
  40. >You say to yourself, struggling against unconsciousness to find the word you’re looking for
  41. Unexpected
  42. >Is the best you can do before you lose the struggle
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