Taco Shadows

McBaseball Clembons
	McBaseball Clembons was a God of Baseball. All Blaseball gods were once Baseball Gods. But they grew bored of the game, bored of the mortals who played it, bored of the same rigid rules. So the conspired to directly interfere with it. All of them, except one. In His battle to protect the sport from His fellow god, he was struck down, weakened. They sealed him in the last baseball in the Multiverse and pitched him to Earth, never to be seen again.

	Until now. Inhabiting a mortal body, his old name now lost to time, McBaseball plays this twisted game in hopes that with every victory, people will become aware of the old ball game, the one without interfering deities, rogue umpires, and warped realities. And with each victory, he comes closer to his true goal. Justice for the Lost Sports, Justice for the mortals lost to the madness. Justice

	For Baseball.

Yummy Elliott
	Yummy Elliott started out as a newspaper boy working in 1950s Los Angeles. After the Unslam, he's found himself lost and confused in a very modern Los Angeli. He is scared. He is confused. But he kind of understands Blaseball so he's like "ok I guess I'm doing this now?" He tries his best and we all are love him


Nicholas Vincent
	The son of totally not rich businessman Blobba Gerundtiet Vincent, Nicholas got into the Guererro Street Thugs, a musical group famous for their pink lemonade. Nicholas found friendship in the Thugs and love of the stage, but his father demanded he continue the totally-one-dollar-please-don't-eat-me corporation. So Nicholas did what he thought was best.

	He sold the business and used the money to fund other small-time stage productions after his father's passing. Content with life, he joined the Unlimited Tacos in hopes of finding more lesser known theater groups in the depths of Los Angeli.


Ortiz Nelson
	Oritz Nelson was a mad scientist, believing that the Multiverse was a thing and wishing to pierce through to discover what realms beyond the known one existed. Then the Unslam rent asunder reality, inconveniently in the midst of an experiment. An experiment two alternate Oritz Nelsons were doing as well. For a time, the Oritzes had trouble managing their new chimeric form, but with time and practice, they managed.
	Then they discovered LITERALLY EVERY OTHER ORITZ NELSON DIDN'T HAVE THIS PROBLEM. They were the only ones to screw up so hard they fused together. How embarassing. What a clownfest. This is what you get for being the impatient Oritz Nelsons. How do you even manage that? Infinite possibilities and somehow exactly THREE mess up so badly they now inhabit the same body. Clowns, the three of you.


Linus Haley
	Linus Haley has an album of photos. In each photo, he is holding a photo of a famous location or landmark. At the location or landmark. He isn't even doing anything clever like comparing the old and new he's just standing in front of the damn place holding a crappy little polaroid you can barely even see the photo.

Son Jensen
	Son Jensen initially signed up to wear a mascot costume for a car dealership. The costume was uncomfortable, the head was heavy, and the place was hot, even on the lucky days he got to work inside. Then one day, the Grand Unslam shattered reality. Of course, Jensen didn't realize this until after he reached the dealership and realized the mascot costume... looked like him. His complaints to the manager fell on deaf ears, and with that, he was out of a job and stuck with an awful costume.
	When he signed up to join the ILB, some paperwork was lost and the only way anyone could identify him as a player was when he was wearing the costume. The costume that looked like him. Trapped both literally and figuratively inside a facade of himself, Son Jensen's life has become his own personal hell.
	At least he installed internal cooling.

Justin Alstott
	It was the summer of 2007 when Justin Alstott was bitten by a wereotter during splorts camp. She claims her parents did it so she could be a wlater polo star but nobody believes her. To spite her parents she ran away and became a journalist, using her wereotter powers for good. Not like Splider Fella, though. She fights crime with evidence and a gung-ho attitude. She joined Blaseball to get a firsthand account on all the events that unfold.


Adkins Davis
	Health nut extraordinaire, Davis invented the Adkins diet and made it viral with his creative cooking videos. You know like the ones that are top-down and fast forwarded so it looks all neat. Thing is, his obsession with large slabs of cheese, deep frying, and deep frying large slabs of cheese have garnered him many enemies over the years. His life is a whirlwind of Chef Combat, Cheesy Cooking and Cblaseball Cmoreblaseball


Moody Rodriguez
	A living mood ring, Moody desires to help with everyone's moods. It is never satisfied with an okay mood. You WILL be happy. It WILL NOT STOP UNTIL YOU ARE HAPPY. HAPPY NOW!


Pippin Carpenter
	Stop comparing her to Mary Pippins, she is NOT a Nanny she will NOT use her umbrella to do magic you will NOT get a spoonful of sugar stop it N O W

Aldo Comeback
	Aldo earned his last name. He is the Comeback King of Los Angeli. He started out as a rapper, fell off the wayside, and made a comeback so strong he shattered the I-95. Before Blaseball became visible to fans, he was an all star, but being pushed to the shadows has made people forget about him. His return is nigh, and baby, do call it a comeback.


Michelle Sportsman
	Sportsman isn't her last name. It's Spritzman. You see it all started when Michelle was working at a grocery store. She was sorting cereal when a man took a box from her hand. She didn't know what to say so she acted like nothing happened. The man started eating the cereal, spat it out and demanded to see her manager. Still confused she continued placing cereal on shelves hoping the problem would resolve itself. Her manager stormed in, expecting Michelle to be yelling at the customer like she should've been, but she wasn't. She was putting cereal on shelves. Not even the cereal shelves either. Michelle, her manager, and the customer continued going through the aisle until a janitor bumped into the manager, starting another argument unrelated to the cereal eater. They continued moving, gaining more and more arguing people. Michelle kept stocking shelves, having moved from the grocery store to the shoe store next door. Over and over, shelf after shelf, store after store, the mob followed the poor girl until she reached a blaseball stadium. Unbeknownst to everyone, a record breaking 1 person was watching the game, the least viewed game in week. The crowd of rabble rousers took the seats as Michelle placed the last box on home base, looked up, and realized where she was.
	And that's how she became a blaseball player.