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- >Day haha in Equestria
- >You wake up and take a shower
- >You put on some clothes and hear a knock on the door
- >You open it and see Fluttershy with tickets in her mouth
- What do you have there?
- >She drops one
- >You pick it up and look at it
- >It's a VIP pass to Fluttershy's stand up comedy club
- You're a comedian?
- >She nods
- Wait don't you have stage fright?
- >She nods again
- Then how can you-
- >"I'm not s-scared when I'm d-drunk."
- >Oh
- Okay...this is for later right?
- >"Anon are y-you okay?"
- Why?
- >"It's the m-middle of the day."
- >You look around outside
- >Sun is up at the top
- Oh...okay when is it?
- >"In an hour."
- Well shit come in I need to get ready.
- >You move aside and she walks in
- >You shut the door
- Just make yourself at home...and don't use anything as a dildo again.
- >You hear her whine a bit while walking up the stairs
- >Crazy bitch
- >You put on your fancy suit Rarity made you
- >It was her colors but fuck it's fly
- >You look in the mirror
- >feellikeagangster.jpg
- >You walk downstairs and Fluttershy is drinking some wine
- Uhhh what are you doing?
- >"Getting ready for the club..."
- >She has the bottle in her mouth and chugs all of it
- >She throws it and it shatters on the counter
- You done yet?
- >"No."
- >She walks over to the fridge and takes out a bottle of cider
- Lets go.
- >She wraps her wing around the bottle like a hand
- >Wait wat
- >How does that even work?
- >Shut up brain
- >You both head out
- >She doesn't try anything all the way there
- >Strange
- >You arrive at a round building
- >The security guard is a griffon
- >She sees Fluttershy and opens it
- >Fluttershy goes in and you follow
- >You're stopped by the griffon
- >"Hold up there where do you think you're going?"
- >You hold up the ticket
- >He nods and lets you in
- >Fluttershy guides you backstage and chugs the cider on the spot without taking a breath
- >Hory Sheet
- >She's drunk as fuck
- >Stumbling everywhere, being rude and disgusting, and she suprisingly talks better
- >No studdering
- >You sit on a couch that faces the stage
- >The P0ny that was performing got booed off
- >Fluttershy stands up and winks at you
- >"Watch this babe."
- >She flicks you on the hand with her tail and walks towards the stage
- >Damn Fluttershy is more assertive while drunk...
- >Kinda hot too
- >NO BRAIN
- >Fine
- >She stands there on the stage
- >"How is everyp0ny doing today?"
- >You hear one loud voice
- >"Fucking shitty!"
- >You chuckle to yourself as that pone is dragged out
- >Fluttershy starts her act
- >She actually says some mildly funny things
- >Nothing you haven't heard before
- >Except her stories
- >God damn those were knee slappers
- >Like when she told her story about when she first met you
- >"So I'm just walking down the street minding my business right? Out of nowhere comes this huge fucking hairless naked monkey screaming, trips on me and we both fall in mud."
- >"I had 3 thoughts on my mind. 1: Holy shit there are hairless monkeys?! 2: MY LEG! 3: Damn it's got a big hot monkey dick..."
- >Her saying cuss words made you laugh even more
- >She finishes and is cheered as she comes back and snuggles next to you
- >"I love you Anon."
- >You put your arm around her
- That was pretty funny I admit.
- >"You want to go?"
- >She doesn't give you time to respond when she flies back out
- >"Anon is actually here now. He said he could top me with jokes."
- >Butterflies are having a war in your stomach
- >Fucking stage fright
- >Fucking Fluttershy
- >"Come on Anon! Let's have a joke battle!"
- >You slump out and try not to look at...the...thousands...of creatures out there
- >What do I brain?!
- >Failed to load brain.exe
- >Shiiiittt
- >You walk over to her and whisper in her ear
- Why did you do that?
- >She whispers back
- >"Are you too chicken?"
- >Fuck this mare
- N-no I'm not!
- >She backs up and says into the mic
- >"Anon has challenged me to a yo mama contest!"
- >Butterflies have ascended to warfare in your stomach
- >If they keep it up it'll be fallout digestia and you'll shit your pants
- >You start composing yourself
- >"Too chicken to start? Okay I'll start then."
- >You look out to the audience again then back to her
- >She tosses you a mic and you almost miss it
- >"Yo mama's so fat when I threw an apple at her it got caught in her orbit!"
- >Tons of laughter
- >You stand there thinking of one
- >Brain.exe has finished loading
- >Brain.exe has installed yo mama jokes 9000
- Yo mama's so fat that when she fell in love she broke it!
- >Fluttershy is taken back by you actually responding
- >There is a roar of laughter
- >"Yo mama's is so ugly that she entered in the ugly contest they told her 'no professionals.'"
- >Another wave of laughter
- >Butterflies have signed a peace treaty
- Yo mama's so ugly your dad takes her to work so he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye!
- >Even louder cheering and laughter
- >Fluttershy is looking pissed now
- >She even moved her mane out of her face so she could stare at you harder
- >"Yo mama's so old when I told her to act her age, she died!"
- >A less stronger roar but still a roar of laughter
- Yo mama's so fat she needs one barstool for each butt cheek!
- >"Yo mama's so fat she sweats mayonnaise!"
- Yo mama's so fat, she's got more Chins than a Chinese phone book!
- >Everyone is silent and confused for a couple seconds
- >Then a lot of them boo
- >Oh right
- >This isn't earth
- >Meanwhile in your stomach
- >Buttermany invaded Poland and the whole world went to chaos
- >Butterjews were being slaughtered in cocoontration camps
- >Even the larvas were being burned
- >This event will forever be known as the Buttercost
- >"Yo mama's so fat, after she gets through turning around, they throw her a welcome back party!"
- >You hear a party canon somewhere in the crowd
- Yo mama so old her birthdate is expired!
- >Fluttershy is looks worried now
- >Yes!
- >The world powers finally contained and destroyed Buttermany
- >Everyone is given back their land
- >Except Amonarcha is still fighting Butterpan
- >"I guess you win Anon. I got nothin else."
- >Amonarcha has dropped the "Atomic Fly" on Butterpan obliterating them into submission
- >The world becomes peaceful again
- >"Give it up for my love Anon!"
- >Every creature stands up and claps
- >Fluttershy walks with you off stage
- >You both leave
- >"That was amazing Anon!"
- Haha yeah...you aren't bad yourself.
- >"So uh..."
- What?
- >You stop and look at her
- >"Are jokes your fetish?"
- >You sigh
- No Fluttershy.
- >She goes home depressed
- >You go home and throw up because your stomach is fucked from the wars
- >You wipe your mouth and flush the toilet
- Fucking Butterflies
- Fucking Fluttershy
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