I need some help, I am a active HN visitor(a programer) and have 30 pts as karma. I have created this new account to save my identity. Since the past 3 years I have found my self in a suicidal depression and now its the final straw. I am sorry but the only place where I could submit this and speak about my problem is here. This is my story.

I visited the US on a f1 visa, and was studying applied math and computational sci at my _ University. I am originally from nepal and won a country level scholarship for the tuition my university is charging me. Since I was always by myself and never could make any concrete friends during my 3 years stay I got completely lonely. The only conversation that I would ever have in a day was if I was at a cafe or a restaurant making a purchase. I also visited my university psychological treatment center, but they advised me that my depression/loneliness was due to a move to a new culture and new way of life and that it would soon clear up. I also got the vibe that they really didn’t care about such issues so I stopped contacting them. But this wasn’t it. Currently I am facing a much bigger nightmare and hence I believe it would be the final straw. I am facing a federal sealed indictment of 1 count on tittle 18 section 275(c)

(c) Whoever transmits in interstate or foreign commerce any communication containing any threat to kidnap any person or any threat to injure the person of another, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than five years, or both.

Which alleges that I made comments on youtube of depression and mass shooting. Just to clarify I never made any comments of kidnaping, nor have sent such communications to any particular individual. This will most likely ruin my life. ICE (Immigration and customs enforcement) is forcing my federal prosecutor to include terms in my plea deal which says the follows ”Mr XXXX will promptly stipulate to all allegations made by Immigration and customs enforcement without a right to hold a trial.” This basically means I have to agree to a full scale deportation and have my record made in a database that is currently being shared by all developed countries. Some of you already find me guilty for saying this, but I have no option, my federal defender has almost quit my case and is consistently arguing against all my suggestions.
I am lost, I don’t know what to do.
The only hope I see is arguing against my prosecutor that she shared some information present in a sealed indictment with officers that did not belong to the federal court.

Any advise would be welcome.

Thank you for reading.