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Warforged in Equestria : Chapter Five - Cupcakes

Apr 5th, 2012
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  1. > You have faced down demons ten times your size and felt nothing
  2. > Yet this small pink p0ny, barely half your height, and probably not a third of your weight...
  3. > Has sent a chill down your back, which you know only as fear.
  4. > Okay, either the beholder, the portal, or the fall must have done something, there is no logical explanation for this.
  5. > That fact alone...
  6. > It's unacceptable...
  7. > Impossible...
  8. > To Khyber with this.
  9. "No"
  10.  
  11. > Her expression drops slightly further, but her tone has dropped all subtlety.
  12. > "Eat. The. Cupcake"
  13. > It's like shes an avatar of The Fury.
  14. > You honestly wouldn't be surprised if she suddenly grew demonic appendages.
  15. > This is not a p0ny.
  16. > This is an incarnation of passion driven to it's logical extreme.
  17. > You're doomed.
  18. > But you do not waiver.
  19. > Not like you have a choice at this point.
  20. "No"
  21.  
  22. > Her eyes just narrow at you.
  23. > You see where this is going and start to back towards the door.
  24. > Not taking your eyes off her this time.
  25. "I hate to be rude, but I really should get going"
  26. > You have nowhere to go, but getting out of here until Pinkie Pie cools down seems like the best course of action.
  27. > You really do hate how rude this must seem but you honestly can't eat, and explaining that would take too long.
  28. > At least when shes that far gone.
  29. > Still you'll be doubly sure to apologize.
  30. > After all she seemed to have good intentions.
  31.  
  32. > These thoughts are interrupted as pinkie literally disappears in a puff of smoke in front of you.
  33. > You take this opportunity to about heel turn and get out while you can.
  34. > And turn straight into Pinkie pie.
  35. > Well sort of, you turn into a cannon being leveled off at your face, it just happens to be Pinkie operating said cannon.
  36. > WAIT WHAT.
  37. > Before you could possibly react, she fires at you.
  38. > The resulting blast coats you in something and sends you hurtling through the counter.
  39. > What is with these p0nies and sending you flying?
  40. > Honestly you weigh like six-hundred pounds, they should have a hard time getting you to budge, let alone throwing you.
  41. > And what in Khyber are you covered in?
  42. > You wipe your eyes clear and take a look at what you are now covered in.
  43. > Is that... blue frosting and... bits of cupcake?
  44.  
  45. > Did she try to kill you with a giant blue cupcake?
  46. > By the Sovreighn Host, theres frosting everywhere!
  47. > You jump back on to your feet.
  48. > You look around the shop for Pinkie, only to find you don't need to look far, shes right in front of you on the ruins of the counter.
  49. > She's back to her manic grin.
  50. > You're still staring with the ever-unchanging face of yours.
  51. > "Weeeeeellllll?"
  52. "Pardon"
  53. > "What'd you think of the cupcake!?"
  54. > Are you kidding?
  55. > She tried to make you eat a cupcake via CANNON.
  56.  
  57. > Yep she's insane.
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