"Dear Nobles Parents,

It has been a difficult couple of days on the campus. Your children have been magnificent, caring for one another, asking great questions, seeking help and advice. It is hard to explain to some students why everything does not stop at school under these circumstances, but the reality is that routine is stabilizing and confers a sense of safety in a time that feels chaotic. Moreover, given that students are in widely different places in this experience, it is far wiser to adapt to individual or specific group needs than to assume we can respond appropriately for the whole. The faculty and counselors have been wonderful, working through their exhaustion and grief to do their very best to support the kids and our community. I am grateful to be surrounded by such people, both adults and adolescents; you should be proud of them. The measure of people is not how they handle success but rather how they contend with great adversity, and by that standard Nobles is a special place. We will continue to provide opportunities for students to remember and honor Jane Song appropriately.

I have been in contact with Jane's parents at some length, who are, as you would surmise, devastated. Mr. Song works overseas and had to make a long trek home. Today, after finally having some opportunity for thought and planning, the Songs have relayed to me plans for services, which I share below. They also have asked, after reflection on an initial request for privacy and through their grief, that I be completely open with all of you that Jane's death was the result of suicide; they want to do all they can to help ensure that this never happens to another child. I plan to talk about this in assembly on Monday and I want you to have the opportunity to discuss this with your children over the weekend.

One thing that concerns me, of course, in the wake of this event, is that someone will be troubled that they perhaps missed a sign or opportunity to help Jane. I want everyone to know that there were no such signals that we can ascertain. No child should carry the weight of worry that they might or could have done better by Jane. That is simply not the case, and students who are mourning should be able to do that without any extra burden of concern. There is enough emotion, pain and confusion in this situation that no one should add that to the list.

We have taken a number of steps here at school and will continue to do so in the weeks and months ahead. Now, with the Song's permission, we can address the issue of suicide directly and clearly with our students. We will be doing considerable thinking about the most appropriate and effective ways to do that. While we do have, sadly, much experience in helping students and this school through the grief process, suicide presents special challenges. Director of Counseling Jen Hamilton will start to communicate some thoughts and resources in this regard in her subsequent correspondence with you. You also should feel free to reach out, as I said in my note yesterday, to advisors, counselors, administrators, class deans or administrators.

Please accept my very best wishes for a good weekend. The service information follows below my signature. Students and families are invited to attend both or either event.

Bob Henderson

Robert P. Henderson, Jr.
Head of School
Noble and Greenough School


Jane's Wake: Monday, December 5, from 4:00-8:00pm at Burke & Blackington Funeral Home,1479 Washington Street, West Newton, MA 02465.

Jane's Catholic Funeral Mass: Tuesday December 6, 10.30-11.30am at St. Antoine Daveluy Parish at Corpus Christi, 45 Ash St. Auburndale, MA 02466."