(FR) Cuil

>Day Cuil Theory in Equestria
>You wake up
>Begin the shit shower shave
>Your razor has turned into a cheeseburger
>As you turn around your door mimes a re-enactment of the Hindenburg
>You can taste your toothpaste turn into the color of right
"What the fuck is going on?!"
>You grab to put on your pants
>I hand you an Allen wrench that is two sizes too large for my car
>The walls fold away to reveal foals dancing with a creature made of sound and sharpness
>Your head hits the wall as the universe shifts ten inches to the left, excluding yourself
>You start to run, only to see your feet propel you at a right angle to reality
>The doorbell sounds
>A mushroom grows on a dead tree only to laugh at the death of it's nourishment
>Light comes in waves
>I hand you another cheeseburger
>Your mouth is dry of pink attic insulation
>A creature of many limbs crawls out of your shirt and mocks you on your fashion choice
>Fluttershy begins eating the sound around her
>I hand you your first cheeseburger
>A small filly laughs at you
>You turn around only to fall up the stairs
>You eat the Allen Wrench
>Reality meshes with a universe that exists at a 14 degree angle to yours, causing all triangles to be 194 degrees
>Motes of triumph bleed through the stratosphere
>You hold your ears, close your eyes, and start yelling
>Only your mother can hear
>[SCENE MISSING]
>Wake up in a wrecked house
>Fluttershy is on top of you, leaking both her and your fluids onto your groin
>...What the fuck just happened?!
>Were you...
>Fucking Fluttershy?