LNPP from thread 101

488_______________________________________________________________________________________
Non-Canon
>Pinkie
"AJ"
~~~~
>Welcome to Not Late Night /pa/ with your host Pinkie Pie! It's during this time that content does matter, but some writers feel bad for missing a night! Now for our main guest...APPLEJACK!!!

"Howdy."

>Do you know any of the other fruit related families?

"Now hold up there. Just because Ah'm part of the Apple family don't mean I actually know other fam-"

>Just answer the question.

"...yes Ah do."

>That's our episode for today! If you're watching me when you're suppose to be working, you should probably wake up now.

AJ wakes up.
"Ah'll never forget the Bananas family. They were creepy and kooky. Mysterious and spooky. They were really Bananas"

489_______________________________________________________________________________________
Non-Canon
>Pinkie
"Cadence"
'DT'
[Luna]
{Rarity}
~~~~
>Welcome to Late Night /pa/ with your host Pinkie Pie! It's during this time that content doesn't matter, and we have a bath house Fanservice!

{4 against me? I suppose I should be flattered.}

They surround Rarity.
{...it doesn't mean I'm easy.}
Rarity quickly levitates Charity and shoots Luna's horn off.
[Arrrgh!]

"AUNTIE!"
Appledoll gets in front of Cadence and shoots her with her own shotgun.
"AHH!!!"

'CADENCE!'
DT's backpack fires a laser, but she dodges, lassos DT, and pulls her into a back kick with her remaining leg.
'Ugh!'

>Rocketo Punchie!
She launches a rocket hoof from her duct taped arm. Appledoll takes the punch to the face and slides a bit, but the hoof eventually stops and falls to the floor. She picks it up, attaches it to her missing hind leg, and assimilates it.
>Hey that's stealing! You're leaving me unarmed here!

{Like her new upgrades?}

[Hrrngh]
Luna swings down with her hammer in her mouth. Rarity hops back letting the hammer smash the tiles in front of her.
{Too slow!}
Rarity shoots both of Luna's forelegs.

[Uuugh!]
Black ooze pour out of her wounds and her veins near the spot become black.
{Feel my power coursing through you.}

>Hang in there!
She reaches into a tub and pulls out a cannon. She then attaches it to her stump.
>Duhna na nuh super fighting robot.
Fires an alligator which bites Appledoll on the face.
>Duhna na naaa Megamare!
As Appledoll struggles to get it off, Cadence and DT stand on either side of Appledoll.

"PRETTY ARROW!"

'ROCKET DRILL!'
The respective projectiles hit their mark and shred Appledoll in an explosion.

>Aw, I would have liked my hoof back.

{How dare you!}

[HAMMER TIME!]
Luna smashes the floating Charity with her hammer and the black wounds disappear.
[MOON KICK!]
She kicks Rarity into the hot springs. As the group walks up, Rarity pops back out of the water.
{Back off! I...have a towel!}

490____________________________________________________________________________________
Non-Canon
>Pinkie
"Cadence"
'DT'
[Luna]
{Rarity}
~~~~
>Welcome to Late Night /pa/ with your host Pinkie Pie! It's during this time that content doesn't matter, and you have to bring your own towels!

"Look out she has a towel!"

'...so what?'

"It's wet!"

Luna's horn is forming back
[That's it?]

>Um...ok.
Rarity uses the towel to smack Pinkie into Luna. She spirals it around her arm and attempts to drill into DT.

{STRIKING SPIRAL!}
Cadence blocks the drill with her swordwhip.

"I TOLD YOU! WHY DIDN'T ANYPONY LISTEN!?"
DT moves and shoots TBDRLIATU
'PLASMA CANNON!'
Rarity pulls back her towel and catches the plasma ball in the towel.
'FABULOUS REDIRECT!'
She rolls it around the towel and redirects it at DT and Cadence.

"'AAAHH!'"

Pinkie's cannon glows orange and she jumps up.
>SURPRISE GIFT!
A glowing box shoots out. Rarity rips it with the towel and gets covered in glue.

{...That was surprising.}

[LUNAR CRASH!]
Luna smashes Rarity with her hammer, but a giant spool is destroyed in her place.
[Tch, I just need that one blow.]
A towel wraps around Pinkie.

{SPARK OF INSPIRATION!}
Pinkie gets shocked.
>AAAAAAH!
Rarity flings her into a fountain shattering it.

'CRYO BOMB!'
She throws a bomb that encases Rarity in ice.

"THE PERFECT CUT!"
Cadence cuts a thread that leads to a nearby spool.

[LUNAR IMPACT!]
She uses her hammer to utterly shatter Rarity apart. The shockwave shatters the porcelain all around the bathroom. Luna lands on the floor with a light tap.
[There we go.]

>Ugh...did we fix her?

[Not yet. I shattered her mind. Now we need to piece her back together.]

>WHOA WAIT WHAT!? SHATTERING HER MIND DOESN'T SOUND GOOD AT ALL!

[Hence why we put a lot of effort into preventing it in the first place.]

{Ohohoho!}
The bathroom gets covered in shadow and a black coated Rarity enters with a walking throne.
{Aw my poor sexdoll. Oh well, I suppose it's time I made my presence. Shall we dance?}

491____________________________________________________________________________________
Non-Canon
>Pinkie
"Cadence"
'DT'
[Luna]
{Rarity}
~~~~
>Welcome to Late Night/pa/ with your host Pinkie Pie! It's during this time that content doesn't matter and Rarity...is sitting on my toilet.

{No...I'm not on a toilet. This is clearly a throne.}

"...nope that's a toilet all right. I have one similar at my castle. Do you know the same toilet maker, Pinkie?"

'Is this why you've been using sexdolls to fight us? You were on a toilet?'

{Fine yes, it's a toilet. SOMEPONY shoved an enema up my behind!}
They snicker.
{Stop laughing! You're all going to-}

>I can't wait to air this!

{...what?}

>There are cameras all over the dreamhouse. They're transmitted and instantly edited. The newest thing in dream video marketing, instant videos. They're out before the adventure is even finished.

{You mean everypony is going to see me...}

>Yup.

"Gross."

'Embarrassing.'

[...Could be worse. I've seen some *CENSORED*.]

{No...THIS IS TERRIBLE! I CAN NEVER SHOW MY FACE AGAIN!}

>But this gives you screen time.

{Not like this. I'm just going to be seen as a cheap...trollop! *sobs* My life is ruined! I might as well just die!}

[That makes things easier.]
Lifts hammer.

>Maybe it doesn't have to come to that.

"No she's right. I'd die of embarrassment."

'Just kill yourself. I want to wake up.'

>(speech)Hold on, people think it's Rarity. You don't have to be Rarity. Just go back to being cardboard Rarity and you wouldn't have to face the consequences of being publicly humiliated. I can put you in my show if you want.

"The shame!"

'Kill yourself, Rarity.'

[Can I break you now?]

{...you know what? This isn't worth canon screen time.}
They blink and Cardboard Rarity appears. The real Rarity turns to normal looking dazed. They look back at CRarity to see she moved and soaking up the water from the wet floor. Another blink and she's collapsed on the floor soaking wet. Rarity walks up with a box cutter and slashes her.
{...let us never speak of this.}

>...anti-climactic.