Abnormal Norman 27:The Griffin's Wild Ride

Abnormal Norman 27:The Griffin's Wild Ride
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Be Norman
The Void

>Here I am again.
>Floating in the black pit of unknowing.
>Last time I was here, I played poker with Nolan, and hopelessly lost.
>I wonder to where this will take me.

>You finally land on a separate ground. A lone SUV is in front of you.
>You walk towards it. The light illuminating from the ground.
>Walking closer, you see it more clearly. A white SUV. Blood smeared on it's rear.
>You enter the car, seating in the passenger's seat.
>Atop the dashboard, you see a small minifigure of a building.
>It's like those knock-off toys you'd find at Mcdonalds.
>Atop the figure are two tinier figures.
>Two tiny stick figures. One with his body orange and his pants dark green, the other has his body black and his pants...pink.
>The orange one wearing an orange beanie, while the other wearing a fedora.
>Please tell me I'm not battling someone called "Euphoria".
>Then again, the other one looks too familiar.

>"Ah, I see you've in."
>You look to your left. The mysterious purple haired woman wearing a gray fedora and jacket.
>You want to ask her anything, but a mysterious force forces your lips to be shut.
>"I know that look in your face."
>You say nothing...mostly because you can't.
>"Let's drive for a moment." she said.
>When she started the car, the car floats up, and drives in the air, like something from Harry Potter.
>As we pass through the dark void, I see multiple statues standing on floating, glowing grounds.

>The first one had Fluttershy in the boxing ring with you cheering for her.
>The second one had you, Rarity and Brad fighting a monster with floating huds similar to those of an online video game
>The third one had Brad and what looks to be Shimmers riding two horses in a cowboy's getup.
>There are more, but they're out of my sight's reach.

>What is all this?
>I have no mouth, yet I must ask.
>This is suffering.
>"The multiverse is one hell of a place, huh Norman?"
>She said your name. She knows who you are.
>You nod in accordance, hoping she'd tell you more.

>"Kinda weird, seeing all your adventures, all your stories..."
>She speaks in cryptic nonsense.
>"And to think that you started off as a nameless boy trapped in a background of a forced movie."
>She drives forward, closer to a round white light.
>As she drives, ponies with bat wings fly through the  void, laughing and giggling.
>You see a green man in a tuxedo, caring for ponies while being called "Anon" by the ponies, standing on another floating ground.
>And many more.

>As you drive closer to the light, you finally got to open your mouth.
"Where Am I?"
>We have reached the light.

>"Home, to where you began."
>shhhwwaaaaaahh.mp3

>...

>Your alarm clock rings. You wake up from another nightmare.
>You come downstairs for a quick breakfast.
>Your dad gobbles up his eggs and bacon like a hyena.
"Whoa, dad. No one's gonna steal your food."
>"Heh, I'm just in a hurry, son."
"Late for your job?"
>"Uhh...yep. Got a deadline to submit..."
>Your dad's an undercover cop, and he hasn't told you, or your mother.
>He stands up, kisses your mother goodbye while he pats you on the back and heads out.
>"Don't worry honey, I won't be out all night!"
>"Alright, dear. We'll be having steak tonight."
>And then he walks out.
>"Norman! Looks like you haven't slept well."
"Is it that obvious?"
>"Couldn't sleep?"
"I...I guess so. I'm gonna need a jug of coffee for the morning, heh.


Be Rarity
City Park, picnic with your friends.

"Well, it's nice to finally have some get together for once in this fine Sunday morning."
>You and your friends sit on the picnic blanket, enjoying a fine meal made by Pinkie and Applejack.
>Octavia's at the picnic too, establishing the friendship you and Octavia started a few nights ago.

>"Well I'll be, Rarity. You picked ah fine day for a picnic. Ah can't even see  a cloud anywhere on the blue sky."
>"Yeah! Even Gummy's enjoying the day. Just look at him gobble up the potato salad.
>"..."
*collective laughter*
>As you and the gang have fun, Brad comes in carrying Twilight on his back.
"My goodness, what happened to Twilight."
>"She forgot to sleep yesterday." Brad said.
>"Hnngshhe...moon is not cheese...plutoisnotadog...ksssh"
>Brad lays her down on the picnic blanket.
>"H-hey girls, sorry I'm late." Fluttershy said.
>As Fluttershy says hello, a giant soccer ball comes from the sky, thanks to Rainbow Dash's kick.
>Angel Bunny comes from her pockets and counter kicks it back to Rainbow.

>"WHOA!"
>Angel then wears a homemade 'deal with it' glasses, to which everyone at the picnic laughs.

>Rainbow then comes to sit with the rest, Brad sitting down next to Twilight so she has something to lean on.
"Aww, isn't that cute.  You two make a fine couple!"
>"Hey, just being a gentleman as Norman taught me."
>"Speaking of which, where is Normie?"
>"Ahh, he's probably just busy.  You know how he is these weeks."
"Yes...he's always busy..." You say in a begrudging way.
>Brad, Flutters and Rainbow look at their sides to avoid eye contact.
>Suspicious behaviour.
>Gotcha.

>Truth be told, this isn't just some get together. You're here to see whether the rumors are true about Norman dating Lyra.
>Octavia formulated the plot, and you happily complied.
>To start off, we need to pressure out anyone else in your circle of friends on how much they know about Norman.

"So, fellas. What do you think about Norman and Lyra? Surely they must be dating."
>"I'll say. They're always busy, and we see them almost everyday after class." Octavia added.
>Brad reacts, saying "Uhh" with a blank face.
"Don't you find it weird that he hasn't even told us about her as much?"
>Rainbro reacts, sweating with her eyes looking everywhere.
>"Plus, I've always found it weird how Lyra kept hanging out with Norman almost every night."
>Fluttershy reacts, shivering as if it was Nightmare Night.
>"sHsshgruahpha" Twilight grumbled
"Twilight?"
>"Ohhsh don't be suchh a doubter, Rarehteh. Norman's jussht been through aloth, doing great deeds amongst the community..."
>"You mean like going to soup kitchens and serving the homeless?" Octavia asked
>"Yeesss...sure." Twilight replied as she dozed off onto the bowl of potato salad.
>Gummy jumped on her head and circled about before declaring her hair as Gummy property.
>Everyone laughed, all except for you and Octavia.
>"Come on, Rarity, you jealous that Norman's hanging out with another girl?"Rainbow Dash teased
"Me, jealous? Please." you replied.
>"We're just curious over the mysterious relationship they have." Octavia added.
>"Yah know, uhh, Octavia, right?"
>"Hmm?"
>"I've always pictured you as ah high class student. Why are you so interested in gossip all of a sudden?
>"I'm only interested in what my dear friend Lyra is doing all night with a boy her age. Don't you know how scandalous that sounds?"
"Speak of the demons."

>Across the other side of the park, you see Norman walking by the side.
>And Lyra, walking torwards Norman.
>Oh my...
>"O-oh, look. It's Norman and L-Lyra..."
>Norman looks as if he'd woken up from a bed of thorns.
>Lyra on the other hand looks angry-happy.
>Norman raises his hand to say high, with a smile on his face.
>Lyra runs torwards him.
>"Well ahh'll be. This must be like them romantic movies where the two lovers run torwards each other on a beach during sunset!"
>It all looks so...romantic. Even Octavia can't raise her dropped jaw.

>As Norman waves his hand, Lyra comes to him...
>And punches his face.
"What
>"The"
>"Tarnations?"
>"Wow, even Gummy's surprised! Just look at his jaw drop!"

>Norman recoils back, holding his left cheek.
>His mouth yells "What was that for?"
>Lyra kicks his testicles with her knee. A slight smile can be seen from this distance.
>"S-should we go help him?"
"Shh, Fluttershy, this is good stuff!"
>After Lyra made his balls drop, she storms off after patting his back.
>"Wow, what was that all about?"
>"No idea, but that was entertaining!" Octavia said.
>After that, Norman waddles torwards the picnic area.
>"H...hey guys." He says
"Well, Norman, that was quite a show."
>"Well...I-"
>Before Norman could finish his sentence, a woman riding a motorcycle comes in far away.
>First she drives up the ramp, launching her up in the air.
>To which she spins 360 degrees before landing near the picnic area, to which she drifts torwards you.
"AHH!"
>"Whoa, Bradical!"
>Bits of dirt fly from the ground as she drifted. Everyone is in shock, but not as shocked as Pinkie and Rainbow Dash.
>"G-GILDA!?" They yell in unison.

>"Sup, Blue, Pink?"
>"G-Gild-ACK!"
>Gilda pulls Norman by the collar and makes him sit behind her.
>"Mind if I borrow your boy? He owes me big time."
>She then shoves a helmet on Norman, and drives off out of the park.
>"Holy sh-"
"MY DRESS! AHHH~"
>Your dress is completely covered in dirt, and you've only prepared your pants for ground dirt.
>"What in the name of Apples just happened?"

>...

>Twilight woke up.
>"Guysh...what did I missh?"

Be Norman
Riding behind Gilda

"AAAAAAAAHHH"
>"You look as if you haven't slept for a while, Norm."
"SHIT, WE'RE GOING TO FAST!"
>"Relax, I can drive with my eyes shut."
"NO, DON'T. J-JUST KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE ROAD."
>"Were almost there."
>The rocky road shakes your body. You grasp on tighter to Gilda's amazon-like stomach, slowly rising up just below her breasts.

>"Norman" your inner voice speaks
>Goddammit Descartes, I thought I locked you up in the Norman vault.
>"You cannot deny your destiny, Norman. Give it to her."
>No Descartes, I...

>The road bumps your body up and down. Your pointing fingers are completely under Gilda's chest, with slight touches.
>Shit

>"Norman...Give it to her."
"I SAID I'M NOT GOING TO BONE HER!"
>...
>shit, did I just yell that out loud?
>"Norman, take your hands off my breasts."
>You feel it in your hands. The anger from your inner hallucinations have made you touch Gilda's chest.
>It's a wonderful and embarrassing experience.
"Ahh, s-sorry. The road's just..."
>"Hehe, just hang on, lover boy. We're almost there.

>...she took it quite well.

A few minutes later

>Arrive outside the borders of Canterlot City.
>Gilda stops by an isolated area.
>"You can change into your suit here.
"W-what for?"
>"You're overseeing an inventory trade, as I told you yesterday."
"Goddammit, I never asked for this."
>"Quit your whining and change."
>You change into your origins suit. Hobo coat and football helmet.
>"Say, ain't that different from your other suit?"
"It's the first suit I ever made. I don't think kids would want to look up to a hero overseeing a criminal trade."
>"You are so full of yourself."
"Look, not being an egotistic guy or anything, but I have seen kids watching the news. ON THEIR OWN FREE WILL!"
>"Well, there's that, and your autism towards this."
"I blame Brad."
>You put on your origin helmet.
>Brings back the memories.

>"Nice gettup. I can call you...'Burst Blood' *  "
>[spoiler]*From the left over names in the 'Abnormal Norman names' pastebin' -Dan[/spoiler]
"Why?"
>"I don't know, you look dangerous, dirty, and you look like you've bursted enough head veins in your day."
"Oooh, edgy." you say in a sarcastic tone.
>"Remember kid, mess this up, and you can say goodbye to your parents. Maybe he'd add your friends in too."
>You grab her by the shirt.
"Don't you ever mention my parents, OR my friends."
>The ring glows as your rage increases.
>"Hey, dweeb. I'm just following orders. It's not my hand that kills your parents if you don't apply yourself to this."
>She pushes you away. Your ring calms down.
>"Now come on. I have to brief the rest of the guys on this mission."

Outside Canterlot, dessert, near the train station
>"Alright, listen up maggots. We're going to transport a heavy load of inventory up at Cloudsdale city. Word is, the Viri Scientia bastards are going to hit us while we're driving."
>She points to you.
>"That's when he comes along. This guy will be your shield. You lose him, we might as well have lost the cargo. Call him Burst Blood."

>She strengthens her scary gaze.
>"And you know what Nolan does to those who fail him..."
>The gang chokes from their spit, others fearing Gilda more than what she said.
>"Alright, everyone cool? Let's ride."

>3 SUV vans ride on the desert as Gilda rides behind.
>You're stuck with the decoy van.
>"So...Gilda says you're called Burst Blood."
"Y-yeah."
>Feels uneasy talking to brutes bigger than  you.
>"What makes you so special."
"I...uhh...managed to beat Noir-Man to the point where he's forced to retreat from Nolan's Factory."
>"Strange, I haven't seen anyone in the factory..."
"W-well, did you see Noir-Man come out carrying a beaten up Nolan?"
>"No."
"And there you have it. I'm like that shield that you can throw."
>"Oh yeah, man. I think I saw him that day, when you and I were smokin a joint!"
>"Yah brah, totally. You know Burst, you're alright with us."
>"Name's Donald Kerabatsos, but you can call me 'Donny * !'"
>"I'm Pigpen! * "
"Uhh, yeah...sure...uhh"
>Well, better stuck with two stoners than getting stuck with real brutes.

15 minutes have passed
"Uhh, hey, what exactly are we carrying here?"
>"Didn't Gilda tell you?"
"I don't exactly trust her..."
>"We're carrying a bunch of drug makers, brah!"
>"Totally. No drugs at all, though I could use some good old fashioned Muffs right about now."
"Muffs?"
>"Muffinphetamine, man. They're tight as hell!"
>"Hazel Harvest* is like, the world's best bakhemist! **
>[spoiler]*As seen in the mlp wikia character list. **Baker+Chemist. -Dan[/spoiler]
>"I could sip like...20 pounds in a week, man!"
"So Gilda was telling the truth."
>Well, no precious cargo at all. Just some tools for the trade.
>What could possibly go wrong?

>*BANG* *BANG* *RATATATATA*
"HOLY SHIT!"
>"Brah, check outside. What's happening?"

>"WE'RE UNDER FIRE!" yelled Gilda.
>The van moves faster as the driver stepped on the gas pedal.
>You look behind you. Gilda's firing at the sky.
"What the hell is happening?"
>Donny looks up from his window.
>"Looks like the animal people are trying to highjack us!"
>Just as Gilda's men suspected.

>Three motorcycle riders ride on across the desert as another flying hybrid fires in the air with an SMG.

>The three riders pour test tubes filled with chemicals on themselves
"Ahh shit, here we go again."
>The three riders transform. One turning into a huge wooden wolf, the other two transformed into two legged hybrid cheetahs.

>Gilda's avoiding the gunfire from above.
>Looks like she needs help.
"Unlock the doors. I'm gonna help Gilda"
>"Solid, brah, helping the lady!"
>Pigpen unlocks the door.
>You launch outside.
"OOF, AHHK, ARGH!"
>Bailing out of a moving vehicle: The worst thing you've ever done.
>Gilda grabs your body from the desert ground as she rides on on her motorcycle and puts you behind her

>"NORMAN, ARE YOU CRAZY, OR BAILING?"
"Hey, I'm the shield here, and it's my job to make sure you survive this!"
>"Fine! Hang on to my belly!"
>Gilda goes full speed, but it's not enough compared to the three riders.
>The huge wolf guy trashes the third SUV, but thankfully it's a decoy.

>"Norman! Ride my baby, will you?"
"WHAT?"
>"JUST RIDE MY BIKE!!!"

>With the wolf distracted, Gilda jumps off the cycle equipped with metal chains. She then leashes the wolf in midair.
>"ROAAAAR!"
>The wolf runs forward, catching up to the remaining two vans as he swerves left and right trying to shake Gilda off.
>Gilda then skis through the desert with her boots as if she was waterskiing, or rollerblading while she held tight to the chains.

>"HAHAHA!"
>Gilda laughs as she slides on the desert ground while  the wolf man runs in confusion.

>Wolf guy's distracted. Three more to go.
>Flying abomination keeps shooting below with his SMG.
>Time to use the power of fantasy physics!

>Using the ring, you charge up your leg strength as you go forward.
>You steer to the right to where the train tracks are.
>It's exactly where the flying abomination is flying.
>Train's incoming too.
>"NO USE ESCAPING US, SAINT'S BRO!" the flying abomination yelled.
"HURGHH!"
>Using your strength, you propel yourself upward while riding Gilda's motorcycle using the power of forced jumping.
>"WHAT THE -"
>You managed to reach the flying abomination with great precision and choked him while smashing his face on the motorcycle.
>You both fall to the ground, the flying abomination with skid marks all over his face.
>"YOU FOOL! YOU'LL KILL US BOTH!"

>*CHOO CHOO*
>Right on cue!
>"AHHHHHHH"
*CRASH*

>You land on the train cart filled with coal, while the flying abomination landed on the passenger's cart.
>What a ride.

>Back to Gilda. She's pulling herself towards the wolf's body.
>"TIME TO MAKE YOU MY BITCH!" she yelled.
>Gilda jumped on the running wolf's back and used him as a makeshift motorcycle, steering him with his ears.
>"MUSH, MUSH!"
>Jeez, that woman's extreme.
>Well, at least we've only got to worry about...oh shit.
>You look behind to see a band of police cars chasing both the Viri Scientia and the Saint's Bro.
>You whistle to Gilda. She gets what you're trying to tell her.
>She rolls her eyes from  you to the police cars. She wants you to deal with them

>*sigh*, here we go

>You take the coal from where you're sitting and, with your super strength, threw it at the chain of police cars.
>I wonder what happens when I do that.
>The coal shoots through one of the tires of the police car , causing it to crash into its comrade police cars, and then causes a chain of car crashes in the midst of a desert wasteland.
>You just look at it with a surprised face.

>10 seconds have passed. The two cheetah hybrids ignore the decoy car and is heading straight for the van carrying the cargo.
>They must have found out.
>Luckily the train you're sitting on is catching on to them.
>Time to jump.

"HURRGH!"

>You jumped forward like a cannonball, and you hit one of the cheetah men.
>"AARRGH!"
>One down, one to go.
>Gilda, rides on and pulls you from the ground onto her back as she rides the wolf guy.
"WHOA!"
>"Heh, Déjà Vu, huh?"
"Gilda, he's gaining on the van!"
>"Not for long. MUSH!"
>Gilda has completely made the wolf guy her bitch.


Be Norman's father
Police car, hiding behind a bilboard with other cop cars in the middle of the desert

>"Normal, our first wave got completely wrecked!"
>Then suddenly, an SUV being chased by a two legged cheetah and a wolf guy being ridden appears in front of you.
"Then there's no time to lose!"
>You lean out of your window and signaled the cavalry.
"MEN, IT'S TIME TO MOVE OUT!"
>All of the police cars move out of the area, and proceed to chase the bastards alledgedly carrying Muffinphetamine.
>"Holy shit, Mr. Normal, what are those things?"
"Probably more of those Viri-Watchamacallit guys trying to get the muffs."
>"Shit, they're huge, and look at those two riding that wolf!"
"Say, that girl looks familiar..."
>You press the gas as you try to catch up.
"Shining, start the warning announcement."
>"Y-yes sir!"

Be Norman
On a wooden wolf-man hybrid

>The chase rages on.
"Gilda, look!"
>You point behind you. More police cars coming your way.
>**"ATTENTION SAINTS BRO. YOU ARE ALL UNDER ARREST. STOP WHAT YOUR DOING AND-"**
>Gilda throws a knife at the police car making the announcement.
>The knife hits the side mirrors of one of the police cars.
>>  "HOLY SHIT!"
>>>  "That's our cue, partner. WE'RE TAKING THESE MENACES DOWN!"
>>   "NO, WE STILL NEED THEM FOR QUESTIONING, SIR!"
>You hear their conversation with your enhanced ears.
>Hmm, that's an awfully familiar voice. Almost too familiar, as if you've heard it your whole life.

>One of the cops lean outside their windows and fires tranquilizer darts
>He manages to tranquilize the hybrid cheetah you landed on minutes ago with 8 darts, while the missed ones hits the wolf man you're riding on his butt.
>3 police cars are gaining on us.
>Donny and Pigpen are trying in vain as they shoot the cheetah hybrid.
>"NORMAN, I HAVE A PLAN!"
"W-WHAT?"
>"THROW ME!"
>She grabs her combat knife that was sheathed on her ankle, and unclips the grenade belt from her body.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"
>"TAKING TWO BIRDS WITH A BELT OF PINES!"
>Gilda stands slightly on the wolf man. You grab her by the waist, spin her up and threw her at the cheetah hybrid.
>She lands on the cheetah and stabs him on the shoulder to clutch on.

>"AAARGH! FOOLISH SAINTS BRO. THE VIRI SCIENTIA WILL DESTROY YOU, FINANCIALLY AND LITERALLY!"
>"NOT WHILE I'M AROUND!"
>Gilda steers the cheetah hybrid away from the van and straight to the direction of the police cars.
>"W-WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"
>"You're gonna end in a bang, mother fucker!"
>The xtreme edge has reached maximum levels
>Gilda takes the pin off one of her grenades and shoves the belt  inside the mouth of the cheetah.
>She then separates from the cheetah hybrid by kicking him on the back as he stumbles torwards the police cars.
>"ARGH, SHMMPHT!"
>>    "OFFICER NORMAL! THAT GUY'S HEADING TORWARDS US!"
>The cheetah hybrid, at close proximity to the police cars, explode from Gilda's grenade.

**EXPLOSION.wav**

"WHOA!"
>Bits of debris fall from the sky, one of which is the tranq gun, far away.
>Gilda rolls on the ground as the SUV manages to get away safely.
>Meanwhile the wolf guy snaps out of confusion and realizes that Gilda's not riding him.
>You reacted fast enough and using your feet, planted his head face first to the ground.
>You then roll to the ground in recoil.
>The wolf man recovers and pounces on  you.
>"YOUUGRHHH. I'LL RIP YOU APART FOR THE GLORY OF VIRI SCIENTIA!"
"Ugh, you'd kill me first with your breath and ideals!"
>You kick him in the stomach and wrestled with him.
>Finally, the tranq on his butt has started to take effect, and in 5 seconds, he falls on you, unconscious.
"OH PRIMUS, YOU'RE HEAVY!"
>You push him off of you.

>You finally stood up, amidst the debris and smoke.
>Looking around, you see the cheetah hybrid's limbs scattered around.
>Jeez, and here I thought this thing couldn't get any weirder.
>You walk towards the police cars. Most of them trashed.
>You can see from afar, none of them are dead. Just broken bones and bruised skulls.
>Damn, Gilda. This is chaotic.
"Gilda! Gilda, where are you?"
>No sign of her.
>You walk closer to the cars.
>>>  "STAY WHERE YOU *cough* ARE, HARPIE!"
>There's that voice again. That familiar voice.
>You walk closer, and what you see shocks you completely.
> "Come on, What's one more body amongst dead abominations?"

>Your eyes don't deceive you.
>Your father, crawling on his knees as Gilda looks at him at gunpoint.


>"These are for those 4 years in the cell, old man."
>Oh god.

"NO!"


End of Chapter 27
Well, this took me longer than I thought.
God I wish I knew how to draw instead of photoshopping.
Also, great work for those who donated to the Capper Memorial Pasta