Adieu_Tout_Le_Monde.avi

[ You see Myra LeJean sitting at a desk, wearing the outfit she reserved for special occasions--black, high-collared, long-sleeves, in imitation of the old japanese school uniforms for boys. Her gray hair is pulled back in a ponytail, and her gray eyes are tired. She smiles, reaches out to the camera to adjust the angle, and begins to speak. ]

"Hello, world."

[ She smirks for just a moment at her own joke, then goes on. ]

"It's been a while, hasn't it? Just about time for everyone's favorite oldfag enturbulatedOccupation to come in from the cold, and give her fam the textwall on what she'd been up to while off-the-radar."

[ Her expression sombers, eyes flicking down to the surface of the desk, breaking eye contact. ]

"Sorry, guys. I can't come back this time."

[ Myra looks back up to the camera with a pained smile. ]

"Not again. Not ever."

[ She puts out her hand, as if to ward off whatever the viewer may want to argue back. ]

"You've all got questions. You've all got arguments. And promises. Just hear me out.

"You owe an old friend that much."

"It's not The Game--I could keep playing forever. Shit, at this point, I feel like I could clear a session with one arm, so long as it can hold the razor. It's not the death--I've known loss all my life. If that was going to break me, I'd have snapped before I began to play. And--and it's not for want of support: You've been the best comrades a Replayer could ask for."

"It's me."

"And if I didn't try for this, well....in a few more years down the road, something even worse would happen. And I wouldn't be able to stop myself."

[ She looks directly into the camera again, solemn. ]

"What is it that The Game makes us confront, over and over?"

"Our own mortality, and the things that are more important than it. Often, it rewards us for that. Shit, there's more unlikely resurrections in a session than a stack of Marvel tradebacks."

"But not always. Not when it's really important."

"So think of this as my Heroic farewell. 'Do not look for me, I am not there,' all that good b'aaw."

"Trust me. You guys all have it well in hand without me."

[ Speaking of her friends and family, she smiles again. Chuckles even, as she gives encouragement and insight. ]

"Violet...mi hermana en inexplicable albinism. Our woman behind-the-scenes. Talk to somebody before you really do go crazy from the loneliness. People are irreplaceable, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't train somebody to take over, sabes? Don't hesitate to reach out. It fucks you up, to stay solitaire. I should know."

"Vitaliy Bokun, why haven't you changed a bit? No, seriously, I mean it. Every session you're just more of yourself; I can't help but suspect you're Replaying simply because there isn't anybody who can breed a better Frog. Also, somehow, you've charmed it into letting you start with nuclear weapons every other damn session, you supervillain. If you stop taking Ross's tsundere horseshit at face value, maybe he can keep you from drinking yourself pickled, Vitt."

"Pipes, stop being such a horseshit tsundere. You're really quite tolerable once you've remembered to unclench your asshole. You're the worst kind of poser when you try and act like a more badass version of yourself, you do just fine when you're genuine. Speaking of which: yes, I do. I really do forgive you for every time you tried to mack on me. Jesus wept, Eberhardt. Stop being so guilty, and look to the future, for once."

"Cole, you're gonna do just fine. No, really. Anyone you play and clear a session with is a peer, a comrade, a brother-from-another-slimetube, all that bullshit. You [i]are[/i] a Bad Enough Dude to rescue the president, and by president, I mean, be a Founder along the rest of us. Don't compare yourself to workaholics like Ross and Spenih.
It was something special, sabes? Watching a first-timer grow into being a real player and Replayer. Don't worry too much about going crazy; for you, I think, it'll just be a phase."

"Spenih. Skye. My sister-in-disaster. I can't tell you how much over the years the way I've appreciated your ability to let silence do the talking. Your ability to keep caring, and in a way that keeps you sane, and in the Game, is...I never understood it. Maybe I never will. But I hope I can, someday. I know this--I know this choice is going to hurt you."

[ Smiling, but happy with sad eyes. Tears are gathering in the corners of her eyes. ]

"That it isn't easy for any of you. Or me, if it helps. If I could spare us the pain, I'd be passing out a free hit of Lotus with every dongle alchemized. But that's not how survival works, much less living. You all deserve something our tribe gets precious little of these days: closure."

"To my first session, those of you who're still around - Antie, Sauce, Jay - thanks for pulling your heads out of your collective asses for long enough that we didn't all die the first time around. We had good times. Remember the others for me when I'm gone. And stay alive."

"It's the best way to stick it to The Game."

"I love you all. Goodbye."

[ Her hand reaches out to the camera, hangs in the air for a moment longer than necessary -- she's blinking away tears -- and shuts the feed off. ]