a repeated childhood dream

I kept having the same dream when I was a little kid. It haunted me for months (years?). Even now thinking about it I shudder and feel goosebumps. Who was she? And why did she want me to go up the stairs and through her door? What was through the door? where was she taking me? Why did I fear going through it so much? Why when I finally found my own door (not hers) did I never dream her again?

I almost wish I could dream her again and ask her, but then I am afraid of being pulled through her door again. I feel like it was the most intense symbology for something subconscious in me that I have never realized.

Sometimes I pull myself out of depression by thinking about how I escaped from her and her door and the strength that was in me to do so.