Spoonlicker Anon Pt. 3

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Summary: Anonymous is a child that no one can understand, not even Flutters. A policy of noninterference was put in place, and is being enforced by Twilight. Twilight is also documenting Anonymous for any signs of what this strange creature is.

Last Chapter: Twilight snapped at Pinkie for trying to feed Anon cake. She tried to get Anon to leave, but Anon came right back. Somewhere a fishing rod was involved.

Posted in Thread 850
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>This isn’t working. Anonymous just will not leave.
>In no small part thanks to Pinkie Pie.
>If noninterference is going to have any chance of working now, you’re going to have to use drastic measures.
>You’ll just take Anonymous as far out as seems safe.
>With a huff and a ruffling of your wings you take off from your balcony.
>Lazily gliding down, you land a short distance away from Anonymous, as not to scare it.

>Casually you walk up to the creature, its attention now taken from the partially eaten cupcake to you.
>It starts making those crude noises from before, back when you first found it.
>The sounds are rough and scratchy, like growing tree bark; growing bark that’s being torn and pressed.
>Worst of all, the sounds just string into each other with no rhyme or reason.
>At least the crying is sort of relatable.

>Despite being virtually painful to hear, you keep your pace, undeterred.
>Thankfully, that doesn’t last long.
>Anonymous quickly stuffs the rest of the cupcake into its mouth as you approach.
>It probably thinks you’re looking to steal its food.
>You have to hide your own uncertainty, and present a confident front.
>You are the one in command here, not Anonymous.

 “Come on you.”
>With a soft magical tug, you hoist Anonymous off the ground and onto your back for the second time today.
>It squirms and fidgets, trying to get away, but you hold it in place and trot out of town.
>Why do you always have to be the villain?

>It’s already starting to get late, the Sun beginning to disappear for the day.
>Sweet Apple Acres is visible in the distance, as is the Everfree.
>For being so close, the Everfree was full of strange creatures you’ve never seen before.
>That may be your safest bet, but you’re not going to just drop Anonymous in there alone.
>It doesn’t seem too capable at defending itself, but something about its dual front facing eyes does put you on edge.


>Maybe it relies more on stealth and hiding, but that brings you right back to the question of why it was out in the open.
>And why doesn’t it try to hide now?
>Was that what it really wanted at Pinkie’s?
>That doesn’t seem right. As soon as it had the cupcake it was happy to just sit in the middle of the road and eat.

>Anonymous seems to have given up on resisting.
>Its arms are crossed in front of it, and its head is focused on the ground.
>It certainly doesn’t seem pleased, but you’ll let it down soon enough.
>It even looks a bit like a brooding Spike.
>A blast of air shoots out of your nose as you internally laugh at the comparison.

>So far it seems okay with magic, but you don’t want to risk teleporting.
>Who knows how it would react? You really shouldn’t have used magic in the first place.
>You can’t get caught up in the moment like that. You’re smarter than that, Twilight. You should have waited to do some tests first.
>Tests you didn’t want to do.
>Of course, the tests would be safe, but for all the supposed stubbornness the creature was showing now you knew it was really scared.
>That was one of the only things Fluttershy could get from it. Something you kept at the forefront of your mind.

>On the horizon you can see a pony coming to meet you.
>The silhouette of the hat instantly gives it away.
>”Hey ya Twilight! What ya doin’ out here?!”
>Her shouts cause the creature on your back to look up.
>Anonymous is looking at her with the same curiosity it had when you and Fluttershy first approached it.
>Well, not exactly the same. It seemed less….defensive? Was that how you would describe it?
“Hey Applejack! You may want to stay where you are; I’m taking the creature to the Everfree!”
>Applejack instantly stops in place.
>”Ya think that thing came from there?”
“Maybe. I’m going to drop it off near the edge and hope for the best.”
>”Ah’ll come with ya, but, uh, ah’ll stay back a ways.”


>True to her word, Applejack stays about ten paces behind, and follows you towards the forest.
>Anonymous is constantly watching her from its seat on your back, and Applejack looks a little nervous at the stare.
>You notice her flash a weak smile at Anonymous before turning her head to either side for something else to look at.
>Applejack is pretty brave to keep so close to the creature, while Pinkie is just insane.
>But then where does that put you?
>You’re just the pioneer here. Doing what needs to be done.
>Right?
>Right.
>And Fluttershy was your faithful assistant; until you told her to go back home.

>That may have been a mistake, but you were worried about her.
>She just gets so caught up in the wildlife.
>She’s like the Pinkie of animals.
>Maybe those two are equally crazy.
>Or maybe you’re the one that’s crazy.
>Now there’s a scary thought.

>Night hasn’t quite settled as the three of you reach the Everfree border.
>You give a wave to Applejack and she stops at the nearby hill.
>Entering the forest by the barest amount you turn and signal her again.
“Can you see me from here!”
>She returns the sign.
>”Ah can see ya!”
>You gently pick up Anonymous with your magic and set it down.
“Alright, here you go. Now you get somewhere safe for the night. I’ll come back here to check up on you in the morning.”
>Your tone is sincere, but you’re not 100% sure if that comes across.
>It seems to recognize yelling, so it should pick up that you care.

>Slowly you start walking out of the forest to where Applejack is standing.
>Taking another look behind you, you can see Anonymous starting to follow you.
>You put up your hoof, similar to what you did to Pinkie before you slammed the door, and shake your head.
>It seems to recognize your meaning; the memory of your anger no doubt still fresh in its mind.
>After making sure it was not following; you join Applejack on the hill.
>Just as she said, you can still barely see Anonymous.


>“What do ya reckon will happen, Twilight?”
“Ugh, I don’t know. Everyp0ny is expecting answers, but I haven’t found out anything conclusive yet.”
>The stress of the day has gotten to you, and some of that escapes into your sentence.
>You don’t really mean to sound that annoyed.
>”Well, how long ya been watchin’ that critter for?”
>Besides the few times when it arrived that you had to do other things, it’s pretty much been non-stop.
“Practically since it got here.”
>”You sound mighty beat there, Twi. You should get some rest.”
>Oh you DREAM of sleep.
>Some time to recharge would be sooooo good.
>But you have a job to do. A very important job at that.

“I’d love to, Applejack, but I need to keep watch on the creature. I’m going to grab a few things from home later, and camp out here for the night. If the creature actually goes somewhere to sleep I’ll get some shuteye myself.”
>”Ya know what happens when ya work yerself too hard, Twilight. It’s a lesson ya taught me, after all.”
>This is a lot different than harvesting apples, Applejack.
>Okay, don’t say that part. She has a point, and you know it.
>But who can you ask to help?
>Princess Celestia asked this of you personally. You need to do this alone, to prove you can.
>You’re a Princess now, there’s an expectation.

>Leaves rustle as Anonymous skitters through the woods.
>You can’t make out exactly what it’s doing, but you can see it moving around randomly.
>Its eyes softly glow in the fading light each time it turns to look at you, which it is doing frequently.
>There are some low noises coming from it as well, these ones in a higher pitch than usual.
>Nothing like the crying or screeching noises you’ve heard so far. Both of which are very distinct from each other.
>It really seems to rely on sound, but is that a call? Is it using echo location to find something?


>Each time it looks back at you it pauses.
>Maybe it is worried that you’re watching?
>Giving Applejack a nudge you give her a sign, and start to both turn around.
>But before you can finish the creature comes bolting out of the forest with more of those higher pitched noises.
>Anonymous rushes towards your position and clings on to your neck.

>Applejack has stepped off to the side, and is looking at you in shock.
>Shock you are absolutely sharing.
>The creature’s tears stain your mane,
>Both Applejack and you are frozen stiff, unsure of this new development.

>As the moon takes its place in the sky, two ponies alongside an unknown creature stand on an open hill.
>Like an out of body experience, you are mentally witnessing the scene before you from the outside.
>Your mind had stopped, but the world kept turning.
>In that moment you couldn’t do anything, but ‘watch’.
>Every time you think you have some sort of read on this thing it does something unpredictable.
>Oddly enough, Applejack is the one to snap you back to the land of the living.
>”Ah guess it doesn’t like the Everfree.”

>The muscles in your body begin to register once more.
>Awareness slowly returns, and the sniffling beside you begins to die down.
>Anonymous is absolutely terrified.
>The Everfree seems to have been a bad idea. Maybe it values sight, and didn’t like the trees?
>Stop for a second, Twilight. Stop trying to just guess everything.
>Right now you need to focus on finding Anonymous somewhere to sleep.
>And not just you. Rely on your friends more.


“You may be right Applejack. Any idea where we can put it for the night; someplace away from anyone? I still want to try and keep contact to a minimum for now.”
>Applejack taps her chin as she looks up towards her hat.
>”Hmmmm. Tha barn is mostly empty. That’d be safe, and out of the way from all but us Apples. I’ll tell the fam to keep away for tonight.”
>That works. That works perfectly.
>Anonymous should have some room to roam, but still be safe, AND you can keep track easily without being seen.
>”Aw, shoot.”
“What? What is it?”
>”Figures, Apple Bloom has her friends over for the night. You know how they can be trouble. Ah’ll just have to keep a mean eye on ‘em fer tonight.”
>Less than ideal, but still a very good plan.
“Alright, Applejack, lead the way.”

>Anonymous won’t let go, so you let it ride on your back again.
>There’s a hint of a glow coming from your horn as you light the way just well enough to see.
>Anonymous seems fixated on it, but you’re not going to read into that this time.
>You just follow Applejack to the farm at a leisurely pace.
>It’s not too far. The three of you make it there in no time.
>Applejack pushes open the door, and leads you in with her hoof.
>”Well, here we are.”

>There’ barely anything to the barn floor; just a thin layer of wood, and some patches of dirt.
>Various tools and farm supplies are on the shelves or hanging on the walls.
>Bags of seeds and hay are lumped in piles on the ground.
>It’s no Canterlot Suites, but it’s warm and secure.
>With a flick of magic you light a few of the lanterns throughout the interior.
>Just enough to see.


>You fully enter the barn while Applejack waits at the door.
>Near the center you cease to move and just wait.
>Eventually Anonymous climbs off you, and starts to look over the place.
>You head back out through the door. When Anonymous notices it rushes out as well.
>You point your hoof upwards to the roof, and Anonymous’ eyes follow.
>With a speedy take off you land on the edge where you pointed and lay down, making like you are going to sleep.
>Shortly after you poke your head back up and face Anonymous.

“I’ll be right here. Applejack, give it a light shove back towards the inside of the barn. Just a little one.”
>Although hesitant at first, she gives a soft push and the creature slides back inside.
>She then gently closes the door.
“Go ahead and leave it cracked a bit, Applejack. I want to allow it to come back outside if it wants to.”
>”Alright, Twi.”
>She shifts the door back open a sliver and you fly back down from the roof next to her.

“Thanks. Could you stand watch for a bit? I need to go get some things from home. I’ll be real quick; I promise.”
>”No problem.”
>Charging up your horn you let a blast of magic envelop you.
>You teleport as close to your house as possible, and then fly the rest of the way.

>Spike and Owlicious greet you as you enter the front door.
>”Hey Twilight, how’d it go?”
“Hi Spike, I think everything is sorted out for now. There will be even more to do tomorrow though.”
>You start heading upstairs to get your things.
>”Are you heading to bed?”
“No, I’ll be staying at Applejack’s tonight. Just getting a few necessities.”
>Owlicious grabs a few quills and scrolls in her talons, and starts setting them on the table.
>Spike grabs the ladder and shouts up to you.
>”Just tell me what books you need.”
>Those two know you so well.


“Equestrian Bestiary A-Z, Compact Guide to Wildlife, Strange Creatures And You, World Legends: Fact or Fiction, Pet Care 101, Your Pets Favorite Cookbook, and Biology Series 3.”
>”Packing lightly I see.”
>Smart aleck. Why couldn’t he pick up your good mannerisms?
>Owlicious starts making the pile of quills and parchment even higher.
>Her too? Betrayed by your own assistants.

“Haha, very funny.”
>You grab a pillow and blanket, and head back down the stairs.
>After stuffing in the pillow and blanket, you lift up the saddlebag and place it….Ooof. Okay maybe it was a bit much.
>With the saddlebag securely on your back you address your two wisecrackers.
“I’m going to grab some stuff from the fridge and then head out. Spike, don’t stay up too late. You can have one bowl of ice cream before bed. ONE.”
>”Awww, only one?”
“Okay two, but that’s it.”
>Spike does a little side to side dance with his torso in victory.
>You did owe him for earlier today.

“Owlicious, keep Spike out of trouble while I’m gone. I’ll see you two in the morning.”
>They both nod their heads in acknowledgement.
>Ah normalcy.
>You give Spike a hug and Owlicious a nuzzle, then head into the kitchen.

>Reaching into the fridge you grab the one thing that will give you the ability to get through the night.
>You open a can of Blue Minotaur and chug the energy drink down.
>Your face contorts and your tongue pops out once it’s empty.
“Bleh!”
>It had twice the sugar of a Pinkie Surprise with half the flavor.
>Still, it will keep you awake.
>And you kind of liked their tagline.
>’Blue Minotaur gives you horns!’
“Already got one, thanks.”
>You throw away the can and head out the kitchen door.


>Repeating your earlier maneuver, you teleport and then glide the rest of the way back to Applejack’s.
>When you arrive you see her pulling a cart up to the barn.
>”Twi? That was fast.”
“Hey, Applejack. Thanks again. What are you up to?”
>”Ah just brought out some apple pie, apple fritters, apple turnovers, apple cake, apple tarts, honey apple glazed apples, and some apple cider to wash it all down.”
>You narrow your eyes at her, and she starts to sweat nervously under your gaze.
>”Ah just thought the critter might be hungry is all.”
>She’s as bad as Pinkie.

>You never did see Anonymous eat anything other than what Pinkie gave it.
>Some food might be a good idea, but this is too much.
“Just bring some apples and water please. Let’s stick with natural food until we have SOME idea.”
>Despite downing an entire energy drink your words still contain your tiredness over the situation.
>”Ahhh, right. Okay Twilight.”
>She starts pushing the cart back to the house.
“Leave the pie.”
>With a playful snort she sets the pie down, and resumes pushing the cart.
>”Sure thing.”

>Peeking in through the crack in the door you see Anonymous sitting on the ground with two fistfuls of hay.
>The creature has pulled some of the items that seem to have interested it near the pile of hay against the back wall.
>It drops the hay in its hands near the same pile, and then runs off to get some more from another pile.
>Is it nesting? You really should make note of this.
>No reading into it, just collecting data.


>By the time Applejack gets back with some more suitable food you had already moved your stuff to the roof.
>Including your pie.
>”Sorry Ah took so long.”
>You both peek in and see Anonymous sitting on a flattened pile of hay, with a smaller pile a little further up.
>You don’t want to disturb it, but you should put the food in there.
>Nudging the door open slowly, you bring in the tub of water with your magic while Applejack drags in the basket of apples.
>Anonymous watches you, and starts making those awful noises again.
>Applejack covers her ears, but you try to focus beyond the sound.
>The creature may make those noises based on food…..no, bad.

>Despite your efforts you can’t ignore the sounds for long, and violently shake your head.
>It was just to get the sound out of your ears, but the creature seemed to pick up on it and stopped.
>You give Applejack a poke and the two of you leave, having set the food and water near Anonymous’ nest.
>With a hum of magic you put out a few of the lanterns to dim the lights, and slide the door back into place.

“Thanks for everything, Applejack.”
>”Taint nothin’ Twilight. Ah’m glad it’s you on the case. Yer a real smart cookie, and better than any pony they’d pull from Canterlot.”
>A blush comes across your face from the unexpected praise.
“I appreciate it. Sometimes it feels like I’m the only logical one in an illogical world, but you helped bring me back down Applejack.”
>”Anytime. Now Ah’m gonna go back inside and catch some winks. Ah’ll cya in the mornin’, Twi.”
“Good night.”

>Okay, girl. Now’s your time to shine.
>Anonymous is accounted for, no one’s around to try and get in, the plan of noninterference is actually getting a chance to work, everything’s apples.
Nom.
>Mmmm, pie.
>With everything back on track you can barely contain yourself.
>TIME TO RESEARCH!
>You give a little hoofpump and open up your first set of books.


>Let’s start with the pet books.
>Namely the sections on food.
>Check the appendix….anything on batter?
>No.
>What about cake batter?
>No.
>Cake mix?
>No.
>Cakes?
>Blueberry cake for bears, carrot cake for rabbits, devil’s cake for Cerberus
>None of these are helpful.

>Next set of books.
>Biology Series 3.
>Minotaur children.
>Not even close.
>Some similar features, but just as the Princesses said it doesn’t appear to be one.
>Other bipeds.
>Hydras, some species of dragons, birds, some of the primates, some marsupials.
>Hmmm. Still looks radically different from a primate. You’ll mark the section for later.
>Anything in the wildlife guides and legends about strange creatures?
>Nothing that sounds like Anonymous.

>Looking up you see the moon is only at the mid mark.
>You’ve already exhausted all of your books, and found nothing.
>You didn’t doubt Fluttershy when she said she never seen or heard anything like it.
>Nor the Princesses when all three of them said the same thing.
>But there’s not even an old legend to connect Anonymous to.
>EVERYTHING IN THIS WORLD HAS AN OLD LEGEND!

>Calm down, Twilight.
>Remember what Cadence taught you.
>Breath in, and out.
>In…
>and out.
>Much better. It still surprises you how effective that is.

>Alright, Princess Twilight Super Power #2!
>Categorizing data!
>You’ll just go through everything that’s happened so far, and compartmentalize.
>So there you were in the library…