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[FR] The Best Human Contest - Part 4

Dec 16th, 2012
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  1. The score is as follows:
  2. Team Feels - 0/5 no items
  3. Team Oldfag - 1/5 one red bow
  4. Team Pickle - 1/5 one lock of pink hair
  5. Team Gore - 1/5 one tube of Colgate Total
  6. Team Rarity - 0/5 no items
  7. Team Obscure Fetish - 0/5 no items
  8. Remember teams, the list is:
  9. 1. 1 zap apple
  10. 2. 1 tube of Colgate Total
  11. 3. A lock of pink hair
  12. 4. A red bow
  13. 5. 1 Un-pickled Cucumber
  14.  
  15. >You are now Homonovus
  16. >You and the rest of Team Rarity headed over to Carousel Boutique with Rarity the minute the hunt had been started
  17. >She had been a huge help, but you knew she would be, being the element of genorosity and all
  18. >She had already loaned you her tube of Colgate Total, and had found her last red bow for you.
  19. >Sweetie Belle had been kind enough to donate a lock of her light pink mane for your efforts, so now you only needed a zap apple and a cucumber
  20. >Everything was turning up Milhouse
  21. >You set off towards Ponyville market to find a cucumber
  22.  
  23. >You are now Scrabhunter
  24. >You and Team Feels were having as much luck as Scootaloo at KFC
  25. >No one in the group used Colgate Total, including you
  26. >Aquafresh was the best.
  27. >You know its true because it rhymes
  28. >Also, no one had a cucumber because who the fuck eats cucumbers?
  29. >As you walked to Sweet Apple Acres in search of a zap apple, you passed Team Oldfag, followed shortly by Team Gore.
  30. >Disc-ward, Cordan and Concerned walked by with smiles on their faces while Team Gore grumpily followed behind.
  31. >As they walked by, you saw bulges in their pockets
  32. >This was not good
  33. >You couldn't tell what they did/didn't have because they hid it, but you could probably bet that they had zap-apples, which set your team back even more
  34.  
  35. >You arrive at Sweet Apple Acres and find Applejack off bucking some apples
  36. >You approach her and ask
  37. Applejack, do you have any Zap-apples in stock?
  38. >she replies
  39. >"Well, Ah can go check, but its been about seven monthes since the last harvest. You'll be lucky if we have two or three"
  40. >She goes off towards the barn, and arrives back with a rainbow-colored, slightly moldy apple
  41. >"Yer in luck Scrabby, Ah have five more plus this one!"
  42. >Then an idea hits you
  43. >You had that extra money you made from working odd jobs all those weekends
  44. Hey Applejack, if I pay you, say, Forty bits, could you not seel any more Zap-apples until the Best Human Contest is over?
  45. >"Why, I don't see why not Sugarcube"
  46. Thanks Applejack
  47. >You and team feels leave the farm feeling better about your prospects, you had literally bought yourselves some time
  48.  
  49. >You are now Ordung
  50. >The minute mayor Mare had been done telling the contestants the team names, you, ssj4 and slendermane had left for Carrot-tops house, because you knew Picklehead was staying there
  51. >Surely he was bound to have some cucumbers, because he couldn't just pull those pickles out of thin air
  52. >Could he?
  53. >Unfortunately, Fluttershy followed after you towards your destination
  54. >"He-hey Ordung! And ssj4 and slendermane! I was wondering, um, is your fetish having a four-way? Becuase, you know if it is, there are, um...., four ..of us here.."
  55. No Fluttershy buzz off
  56. >"Oh, um, okay..."
  57. >She turns around to leave, but then you have an idea
  58. Fluttershy, wait!
  59. >Instantly shes suction-cupped to your side
  60. >"I knew you loved me!"
  61. Uhh...no, its just I thought you might want to know my fetish
  62. >she *squees*
  63. My fetish is your hair
  64. >You lie through your teeth
  65.  
  66. >"My hair?"
  67. Yeah, do you think I could have some for the road, and then when this whole contest is over, we can, ya know, buck?
  68. >She almost shits herself with excitement, but then all of a sudden her smile fades
  69. >"Wait a minute, you just want my mane for your contest! Well, if you want some then you're going to have to do something in return"
  70. >Oh no
  71. >You look to your partners for backup, but they have dissapeared
  72. >Where they stood, a note rests on the ground
  73. >It reads : Dear Ordung, sorry, but we aren't going to watch as you fuck Fluttershy for her hair. You are a real hero for the team, and we thank you. We'll be in Sugarcube corner when you're done
  74. >Well fuck
  75. >You eventually get the hair, but for the next fifteen minutes, you're
  76. >Fucking Fluttershy
  77.  
  78. The score is now:
  79. Team Feels - 1/5 no items
  80. Team Oldfag - 1/5 one red bow
  81. Team Pickle - 1/5 one lock of pink hair
  82. Team Gore - 1/5 one tube of Colgate Total
  83. Team Rarity - 3/5 no items
  84. Team Obscure Fetish - 1/5 no items
  85. Remember teams, the list is:
  86. 1. 1 zap apple
  87. 2. 1 tube of Colgate Total
  88. 3. A lock of pink hair
  89. 4. A red bow
  90. 5. 1 Un-pickled Cucumber
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