Plus one human (Lyra)

>Rum and coke hangovers... Fuck dude...
>You think there’s some Ponneaid in the fridge, but for the life of you, you can’t fucking move.
>Twilights self-reading book is on fucking full blast, you want to turn it off, but you juuuust can’t move.  Guess you’re going to have to Obsscure Equestrian History one more time.
>Wait… That smell… Is that?  Eggs and Bacon?  No way!  Holy shit that must have been some night.
>”Anon!”
>No.
>”Anon!”
>No, no, no, no!
>”Annnoon!?”
>Oh what the fuck man.
>”Anon!”
AUGH!!!
>Like a cartoon cat you’ve launched your naked ass out of bed and are now clinging to the ceiling.
>”Com down from there.  Celestia, you’re so crazy, come down stairs I have breakfast ready.”
>A mint pony wraps you in a magic aura and is now levitating you down the stairs and into the kitchen.  And you like a possum are staying completely still.
>At your table is a plate of eggs, bacon and toast with a cup of coffee next to it.  You’re dropped suddenly onto the chair and in front of the meal.
>”Eat up!”
>Lyra gives you a warm smile as she sits in front of some daiseycakes
Uhhhhhhhh...
>”Are you alright?”
Eh... Two questions.
>”Hm?”
What is the bacon made of?
>”Oh!  I knew you’d ask.  It’s made of artificial meat that I magicked this morning.”
Magic meat?
>”Mhm!”
>You grab your fork and slowly spear some eggs along with the bacon and bring it up to your mouth.
>...
>Holy shit it taste like real bacon.
>You look up and see Lyra has got up from her chair and is now digging through your fridge.
>Bent over slightly, her tails is raised giving you full view of her swollen mare hood. She winks twice before letting a few drops of herself run down and drip onto the floor.
>”Now what’s your second question?”
>You almost shoot up in the air were it not for to boner you're now sporting.
Uhhhhhh...
>Your eyes are popping out of your head at this point and your mouth has gone completely dry.
>She looks back and gives you a half lidded look.
>”I’m sorry?”
D-d-di-did we… Did we do it last n-night?
>She pauses and gets off her chair, leaning over the table.
>”All night...”
>Lyra looks you in the eyes and licks her lips
 >Oh Jesus Paul Christ no.
>Lyra had always seemed pretty cool if not a little loony.  But after a while she started to ask you about humans back on Earth.  And she asked you everything…
>In essence every question she asked, turned you off to pretty much all mares in Equestria and humping her was out of the question.
>Now here you are.  All your electrolytes gone and with a mare who is probably filled with them.

>Lyra spent the next couple of hours washing dishes and cleaning up the mess from last night.  While you headed back up stairs to put some god damn clothes on.
>It would be nice and frankly kind of cute if it wasn't so freaky.
>”I’m going to get a few things from the general store!”
Err, uhh, okay…
>You wait a few minutes after you hear the door slam shut before you open the window and leap head first outside.
>You sprint to all the way to Sweet Apple Acres hoping AJ will be there and not in town.
AJ!! AJ!!
>You frantically scream for her as you run around the orchard like your ass is on fire.
AJ!!
>From the barn Applejack comes stumbling out.
>”Dang it Anon, keep yer buckin voice down”
>You’re now running faster than you though humanly possible, diving at AJ when you think you’re remotely close enough not to land on our face.
>Unfortunately for you, landing on your face is exactly what you did.
>”Uh?  You alright sugarcube?”
No.
>”Well, ah think I’ve got some ointment for those cuts, you just wait here an-
NO!!
>AJ jumps, you have  never raise your voice at her until now.
Er, sorry...
>”Don’t think nothing about… Now what in Equestria are you running around mah orchard for?”
It’sss, I… Well I…
>”Spit it out…”
I... Kind... offff... Fucked Lyra...
>Those words were all it took to have AJ on her ass laughing.
>”BAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!”
...
>”Ah! Haha though you- haha, said your weren’t gonna rut nop0ny!!”
Yeah we-
>”Oooh I’m Anon and I think mares are gross!”
Okay you can stop now...
>This continues for several more minutes before she even starts to calm down.
Are you done?
>”Ah jus- ha, yeah, alright Anon.”
>Applejack stands up and wipes a few tears away.
>”So what’s the problem?”
What’s the problem?!  Well other than I fucked a pony, Lyra’s being clingy and she’s coming back soon and I’m willing to bet she won’t be leave soon.
>”So?”
SO?!  So she’s acting like she’s my wife or some shit!
>”Well of course!  You rutted her.”
So!?  That doesn't mean she can just stick around and be clingy and acts like were together!
>”But you rutted her.”
I was drunk!!

>Applejack gives you a serious look before starting up again.
>”Anon ah don’t know how they do things where you’re from, but rutting tells a mare you’re interested in- uh, what’s that word? C-cord? No, uh c- COURT!  Yeah that’s it. Anyway, yeah, if you bucked Lyra, then I’m guessing she probably got the impression you wanted to stick with her.”
So what do I do then?
>”Well, ah guess you’re jus gonna have ta tell her that things are done differently where you’re from.  It’ll probably break her hear though.”
>You never thought you’d feel your heart sink a little at haring that.  Lyra seemed nice, eh, maybe this will work... No I won't.
>Applejack is now vomiting cider and whatever else into bucket.  That mare parties hard.
>It’s a short sprint back to your house, where you hope Lyra has not returned to.
>The window’s been closed and locked which forces you to go through the front.
>Lyra’s saddle bags indicate that you failed in getting back before she did.
>Yet you don’t hear her and you can’t find her anywhere.
>Well shit
>She’ll probably come back for her bags.  Right now you need some fluids in you.
>You grab some ponneaid out of the fridge before you notice a note on it.
> You've never been very good at reading equestrian, but you can’t make out the words ‘Anon, went, to, Zercorra, hut and back later’.  And there’s no mistaking the… heart, at the bottom of the note.
>You give a heavy sigh before cracking open your drink and swigging it down.
>The rest of your day you spend lounging around.
>Bonbon gave you a job which helped you save up to have this house built.  Surprisingly the whole thing only cost you six thousand bits.
>Guess inflation isn’t much of a problem here.
>More importantly Lyra has not come back for her bags.
>Zero fucks given, if she wants her bags bag she can come back and get them, you’re not some errand boy who’s nice and gives things back to people when they need help.

----------

>It’s been five days since you woke up with Lyra in your house.
>Ever since then she hasn't come back for her bags.
>Bonbon says she hasn't seen her since the party and according to Twilight Pinkies been absent as well.
>After pouring out the last batch of… bonbons, you look over at your boss who smiles at you.
>Bonbon had constantly apologized about Lyras behaviors in the past and now more than ever.
>”Your free to go Anon, I’ll close up shop.”
>She’s closed up shop ever since you started working here.  Another way she tried to make up of for Lyra.
Naw I’ll do it this time.
>”Oh no, I couldn't do that to you.  You work hard all day and you put up with Lyra, It’s no trouble at all.”
You know boss, I heard you had some plans with that Milky Way dude.
>Bonbon blushes slightly.
>”Oh no, don’t worry, I've got plenty of time.”
Boss you’re not going to convince me, got do what you need to do and I’ll get everything cleaned up.
>She argues for a little while longer before you point out the time and how she’s going to be late.
>You help a few more customers out before you have a chance to change the sign to close.
>Oh shit what is that.
>From the window you make out the one window of your house you can see from the shop.  The lights on.
>Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit.
>Calm down dude, you probably just forgot to shut it off.
>...Yeah
>Next step is to scrub the copper cauldrons used for melting chocolate.
>All you need to do is fill them with some warm water, let them sit for a few minutes and dump them out.  Unless the chocolate has dried out, then you actually have to work.
>Which is exactly the case.  One cauldron was left out during the day and the layer of chocolate is thin enough where you’d fuck up the cauldron if you tried to melt it.
> You get more and more nervous as you glance up from your work to the light in your house.
>It takes a good fifteen minutes before you’d call the cauldrons acceptably clean.
>Getting the cauldrons clean is basically the only big thing you have to do after closing.  The only things lest to do is sweep the place up, put away a few utensils along with the huge bars of chocolate left over from the work day.

>You hang your apron up before you leave, all while filled to the brim with anxiety.
>With everything clean, you leave step out of the front door of the shop, turn around and kneel slightly to lock it.
>The lock gives a click indicating that it is in fact locked.
>”Hi Anon!!”
>You nearly jump out of your skin.
>Turning around you see a pink mare with cotton candy mane.
Oh hey Pinkie…
>”Why so nervous Mister Monkey?!”
It’s just I- I’m a little anxious to get home.
>”Well, you won’t believe the fun I had these past couple of days!”
That’s awesome pinkie but I really to-
>”I went to Zecoras hut with Lyra, and Zecora rhymed the whole time- I wish I could rhyme like her all the time-, I wonder how she got like that, anyway Zecora told me to get a bunch of ingredients and so I did and then she said a lot of weird things about babies and something about seed and she mixed up this white gooey stuff that Lyra had with her, and it smelt funny, so I tasted it and-
>Pinkie follows you the whole way back babbling endlessly about fucking whatever.
>Getting closer to your place, you notice that every light in the house is on.  Not only is that expensive but it sends you through the roof with anxiety.
>You shiver when you put your hand on the knob and hear the sound of hooves inside.
>Time slows as you turn it opening the door.

>Your house is cleaner than it has ever been before, which would be pleasant if it weren't for the dread lingering in you.
H-hello?
>Not a second goes by before you get a reply.
>”Welcome home!”
>Yeah... Lyra’s back
Where are you?
>”I’m in the bathroom; I’ll be out in a second.”
>Great, not only is Lyra back but she’s taking a chick dump in your bathroom.
>”And then Zecora said Lyra couldn’t have cloves in her food and coffee and cider and-“
Hey Pinkie, it’s kind of late, I had a long day and I just want to go to bed.
>Pinkie stops her record-breaking run on sentence and gives you a quizzical look.
>”Bed?  But it’s only seven.”
>A giant grin comes over her face
>”Oooooh I see, ‘bbeeed’. Okie dokie loki!!”
No it’s not like tha-!
>Before you can finish Pinkie is long gone in a cloud of dust.
>You loudly sigh before closing the door
>”EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!”
>You jump again, before you see Lyra coming charging down the strairs.
What the fuck!!
>Lyra leaps in to your arms still loudly squealing.
What the fuck, what is wrong with you.
>”EEEEEEE!!  IT’S BLUE!!  IT’S BLUE!!”
>You feel a chill go down your spin and your stomach drops.
>Oh god…
Wha-w- what’s blue?
>Levitating next to Lyra is a horrifically familiar piece of paper.
>Holding Lyra in one arm you reach over and grab it.
>The little tab is only a few inches long… and half of it is blue.
>Oh god no.

>"OH ANON I'M SO HAPPY!!"
>Your head starts to feel light
I-jus- I- just need some- need, some sleep.
>Lyra has now buried her face in your chest and is still squeeing at the top of her lungs
>It feels like somp0ny has filled your skill with helium and your legs feel like they’re not even attached to you.
>All you can do is walk up the stairs to the bedroom.  You just need to sleep.
>You’ve never heard the floorboards creak before, but it seems even your own house feels the weight of your disbelief and dread.
>The door to the bedroom is closed which means all you can do is lean on it with your forehead.
>”Anon?”
>All you do is mumble in reply
>”Oh!”
>Lyras horn glows a pale green turning the knob
>The door swings open causing you to fall forward, only to be caught by Lyras magic.
>”Oh my are, you alright babe?”
Mrbmbrlssslr

>You too tired to even care that you’re still in your work clothes, nothing matters now.
>Stiff as a board you flop down onto your bed with Lyra in your arms
>Lyra attempts to start pillow talk about generic maternal bullshit.
>You hear nothing.  Sleep quickly takes over.

----------

>Your eyes drift open and are met with the sight of the ceiling in your bedroom.
>Oh Jesus that was some dream.
>Heh, you could have sworn Lyra had taken a pregnancy test and it came up positive.
>Yeah fucking right.
>Sitting up out of the corner of your eye you see a small bit of green.
>Oh god
>Taking the sheets in hand you uncover a nightmare that lurks in the darkest recesses of your mind.
>Lying next to you is Lyra with curlers in her hair and a pink robe wrapped around her.
>”Dad!!”
>Oh
>Lyra turns around looking up at you with a cigarette handing out of her mouth
>Mai
>The door to your bedroom swings open and in charges what looks like a little version of you with green hair, only the lower half is that of a pony.
> Gawd
>The little thing is running around bucking and leaping across the room.
>It then jumps onto your bed squeezing your neck
>”DaddaddadIhadareallyweirddreamlastnighttherewereabunchofpeoplewholookedlikeyouand theyhadtheseweirdblacksticksthatshotfireoutofthemand-”
>”I guess I’ll go make breakfast, since eveyp0ny here is too bucking lazy to make their own damn food.”
>Looking over at Lyra as she walks out you notice a small red string dangling in-between her legs and following her is trail of small red dots.

----------

OH WHAT THE FUCK!!
>A bead of sweat runs down your forehead and off the tip of your nose.
>Just a dream… Just a dream…
>Silly Anon ponies don’t have periods.
>Yeah, they just become really horny and beg for dat dick every month.
>You look over to your right and see that the sheets are ruffled.
>You're not much of a light sleeper, so you don't mess up the bed too much.
>"Goodmorning!"
>Another shiver goes down your spine.
>One thing isn't different from your dream.
>Lyras in your house
>"Are you alright?  You're so sweaty."
Yeah I'm fine.
>Lyra walks over to your bed side and and nuzzels your side, then looks up half liddedly.
>"I guess you were dreaming about me."
Kinda.
>"Maybe we can fool around later."
>Oh christ that's fucked up.
>"How bout some breakfast first."
>Oh thank you
>Lyra trots back downstairs as you get out of bed.
>Frankly you feel gross from not taking a shower last night.
>The floor on the bottom of your shower is still wet.
>Seems like she’s starting to settle in.
>No.
>You quickly run the shower and scrub yourself down.
>But you know that now matter how much you scrub you'll never be clean.

>In for a penny in for a pound then?
>We’ll see
>Stepping out of the shower you grab a clean towel and find your cleanest dirty shirt before heading down stairs
>Lyra has granola cereal laid out for you as well as a plate of eggs.
>You look up to see Lyra biting her lower lip and look down.
>”Sorry I couldn't magic any meat today... I've been feeling kind of tired lately.”
>Daaaaaw
Thas- that’s alright
>The meal goes on in silence until you decide you should probably start asking a few questions
Sooo... You’re pregnant
>Lyras face comes alight but then a slightly bashful look comes over her.
>”Yeah...”
>She glances up and smiles at you.
>You run your fingers through your hair and sigh.
I’m going to be blunt about this... How?
>”How?  Well we got together and-“
No.  I mean how is that, possible...
>Lyra gives you a quizzical look.
Lyra, that’s not supposed to be possible.  My swimmers aren't supposed to be able to bake in your oven... And if they are... *ugh* I don’t want a centaur child.
>”What’s that?”
Like a half pony half human, where the lower half is a pony and the upper half is human.
>”Oh!  Don’t worry the foal will definitely be hu-“
>Lyra claps her hooves over her mouth
>”I mean will be 100% pony, heh...”
>A few moments of awkward silence ensue.
I better get to work.
>No you don’t, today is your day off.
>Yeah but she doesn't know that and you need to go see Twilight.
> Oh okay.  Good idea.
>You get up from the table and make your way to foyer where a pair of leather boots are waiting for you.
>Up until recently you couldn't find any leather of any kind.
>Then Fluttershy introduced you to Angel Bunny.
>And Angel Bunny then introduced you to the black market.
>”Umm, here’s your Bit sack...”
>Lyra levitates a sack full of gold coins to your hip and then ties it securely to your belt.
>Without thinking and feeling a strange urge, you speak up.
Uhhh, you need anything?
>”...A goodbye ki-
Shit, I’m late!
>Before Lyra has a chance to finish you’re out the door.

----------

>You know Lyra is watching you but you at least have an excuse to haul ass.
>Twilights library is out of sight from you house, but you’re just too god damn out of your mind to slow down.
>As you’re running you can’t help notice that pretty much everyp0ny is whispering to one another.
>There’s no way, just now damn way that anyp0ny could know what’s going on.  Just no way.
>”Where you going Anon!?”
>The dirt muffles your scream after you fall flat on your face.
>You crane your head over your shoulder seeing a mess of pink cotton candy mane.
>”You alright Anon?”
H-how?  Oh fuck it, nothing makes sense anymore.
>As you get up Pinkie quickly hops to you and begins to skip alongside you, as you continue on your way to Twilights house.
>Pinkie tries to talk to you but you’re really not one to care about anything other than you getting to Twilights house.
>”Hey where are you going?”
The Library.
>”OOOOO!!  Me too!”
>This day can’t possibly get worse.
>Pinkie without pause goes on about whatever the fuck she was saying before you tried to get away from her.
>Twilights place is in sight, though it might as well be a million miles away with the agony you feel when listening to Pinkie talk.
>You’ve never really liked her, but if you told her off she’d probably cry… And goddamn it when these ponies cry… HHHHHNNNNGG!
>You don’t bother to knock when you get to the library.  You’ve always wondered why everyp0ny knocked at the door before entering, this place is a public establishment, and they shouldn't have to knock.
Twilight you home?
>”Hi Anon!  And the proper way to say that is: ‘are you home’.
Okay, whatever.
>You look over your shoulder and see the Pinkie is no longer behind you.  Awesome.
>Turning back you notice Twilight sliding a black book under her desk.
What that?
>You run over to her desk and snatch up the book before a flustered and blushing Twilight can grab it.
Fifty Shades of Hay?
>”I-it’s not w-what i-i-it looks like!!”
What’s it about?
>”uh… uh… A-AGRICULTURE!!”
>Twilight quickly snatches the book back and locks it in her desk.
Jesus Twi, calm down.
>With Twilight still furiously blushing you decide that you should probably hurry up and break the news to her.
Hey Twi.
>”Yes.”
Ehhhh you know how some ponies are… With like grffons and minotaur’s and stuff.
>”Yeees?”
And you know how they can’t have foals or anything.
>”Mhm.”
Well… Lyra’s-
>”Hi Twilight!!”
>Oh god why.
>”Oh hi Pinkie Pie.”
“Gues what, guess what, guess what, guess what!!”
>”Pinkie calm d-“
Lyra’s pregnant!!
>Twilight blinks twice before smiling nervously.
>”Oh Pinkie, don’t be ridiculous, hehe…  Lyra is with Anon, that’s not possible.”
>”Nu uh!  Lyra told me that the test she bought was blue, and that the kid should be here in a several months and then we jumped up and down and screamed!”
>”Pinkie, a pony and a non-pony having foals is just not scientifically possible.”
>Twilight looks over at you.
>”Ha, maybe you should be doing some research to see how to tell if your mare is being unfaithful.”
The only thing I’m doing is trying to get the bottom of the pregnancy shit and get Lyra out of my house.
>Twilights face suddenly washes over with horror
>”Y-you can’t b-b-b-be serious.”
Hey now!
>You dive over to Twilight and catch her before she falls over.  She’s out cold.
>Great, the one pony that could explain this shit to you has just fainted.
>Yet from the sound of it she’s just as dumb founded as you, if not more.

>You take Twilight in your arms and walk her up to her loft and lay her down on her bed.
>Your last hope of explaining all of this, is now out cold.

----------

>After your head back down to the Library you decide that you might as well have a look and see if any of the books could help you.

>Now you've been looking for about an hour now, and you have found nothing of use. You haven’t ready any, but you don’t have any time to read.
>On the bright side pinkie has gone from talking you to bothering the hell out of Spike.
>You run your finger across the spines of each book; none of them really look like they’d help so you’re not sure why you’re even bothering… What the fuck?
>Your attention is caught by a large black book that feels like it’s made of leather.
>It can’t be leather. Can it?
>This one has a little promise.  Maybe it’s a pony Necronomicon that has instructions for a fertility ritual where you sacrifice a goat or some shit.
>The writing on the inside is completely incomprehensible, it doesn’t look like Equestrian script, or any language you’ve seen back home.
>It does have pictures of plants and lizards and all that; which.  Helps.
>”What cha readin?”
>You nearly jump through the roof.
God damn it Pinkie!
>”Ooooo!  That looks like that creepy book Zecora was using!”
What?
>”Yeah that is the book!  I know Zecora and she makes potions and Lyra wanted a potion so I took her to see Zecora and she did a bunch of weird chants and then put a bunch of stuff in this big cauldron and when she poured a bunch of bottles of this weird potion and then she gave one to Lyra and-“
When was this!?
>Pinkie taps her hoof on the floor for a few seconds before starting up again.
>”The day after the party!”
>Oh god.
>You grab Pinkies shoulders and look her straight in the eyes.  Something you’ve feared to do until now.
Pinkie.  I need you to take me to this Zecora.
>”Okie Dokie Lokie!”

----------

>You’ve been walking with Pinkie for about an hour now in the middle of the Everfree forest.  You’ve never really been scared of anything up until now.
>Everything feels like it’s closing in on you and all sorts of eyes are glowing in the shadows looking at you.
>None the less Pinkie maintains her cheery demeanor, further convincing you that she’s a demon of some sort.
Uh- we almost there?
>”Yup!  Zecoras hut should be just up ahead!”
>Sure enough a few dozen yards ahead you see the lights coming from a grass hut.
>Despite the masks that look like they’d rape you in your sleep, the hut is a nice contrast to the forest.
>As soon as you reach the door, Pinkie promptly begins to bang on the door to the hut shouting at the same time.
>”Zecora!?  You home!?”
>Not even several seconds later the door to the hut opens with a Zebra on the other side.
>The zebra give smiles
>”Ah!  Welcome to my home Pinkie Pie, how nice of you to drop by.”
>”Hi Zecora!”
>The Zebra named Zecora looks behind Pinkie and looks you over before speaking.
>”And who might your companion be?  Who stands as tall as a sapling tree.”
I’m-
>”This is Anon!  He’s the stallion that Lyra was talking about!”
>Zecora looks at you quizzically before giving a look of sudden realization.
>”Ah yes!  The human that Lyra coupled with.  A human from Zebrica myth.”
>Myth?  Fuck no, you don’t even want to know right now, it’ll probably be some long story and you can’t help but feel that when this mare speaks that it is hurting someone, somewhere.
Think you can tell me why she came here?
>”I can certainly tell you, but why don’t you two come inside with me, and maybe have a cup of tea.”
>Zecora turns back inside and is followed by you and Pinkie.
>The inside of the hut looks like you’d a expect a creepy witch doctors house to look.
So can you tell why Lyra came here?
>Zecora turns back around to face and gives a look suggesting she’s trying to remember why.
>”Ah yes I do.  If I remember right, she came before night.  With Pinkie Pie as her guide, their bravery I could not deride.  The Lyra asked me if I could brew her a potion, that would put her maternity into motion.”
What?!
>”She did indeed and with the brew I made, she will succeed. “
So you’re telling me you made her a potion that makes her pregnant?
>”I did indeed.”
So there’s not stopping the foal from coming then.
>”Well it is not as simple as that; if she does not take another then her body will begin to fight back.”
Er, what?
>”The potion must be consumed every week, if it is the father’s child that she seeks.”
> “And then Lyra will have a little baby human! Woo woo!”
WHAT!!??
>”Yes Anonymous it is true, for those are the effects of my brew.  But I hope that Lyra will be here soon, for the child will not be alive by tonight’s full moon.”
>There’s a long bout of awkward silence.
So you’re saying that you’re expecting her to be here?
>”Yes I do, but she better come soon.”
>You give a long sigh.
I… I guess I could take it to her.
>”Awww, that’s so sweet.  I knew you two were meant for each other.”
>You feel the need to glare at Pinkie, but she honestly doesn't deserve it.  Not while you’re going to do what you’re planning to do.

----------

>With Pinkie still following you begin to make your way out of that hell hole.
>No matter how long you’re in there you don’t think you’ll get used to it.
>You feel the bottle in your pocket swishing back and forth.  The stuff looked exactly like jizz so you feel a little better knowing it’s not like the thick loads you shoot and that it’s probably not jizz at all.
>Why hadn’t Lyra told you about this?  Yeah you’re not dating her, but it still would have been nice to know.  Jesus, so there’s going to be two humans now…
>Wonder what the kid is going to look like… No!  goddamn it you don’t want a kid!!  Foals seem well behaved but the little biters back home are a nightmare!!  There’s no fucking way you’re going to let this happen!
>You were panning on smashing thing.  But now that doesn’t seem like such a good idea.
>You need to find Lyra, all this ends today.

----------

>The forest eventually peters out and you dump Pinkie off on the flower ponies on your way into town.
>You fumble in your pocket and take the potion out.  No matter how you slice it the stuff looks like jizz.
>As you pass Bon Bons shop you glance over into the window.  A single pony walks out putting away a box of chocolates.
>It’s Lyra.
>She gives a deep gasp when she sees you and runs up to you wrapping her hooves around you.
>”Oooo!! There you are!!  Bon Bon said you didn’t have to work today and I was so worried!”
Yeah.
>Lyra keeps her face buried in your chest for a few more minutes before you speak up.
So I’m guessing you were running a few errands?
>”mhm!”
Well then, I picked something up for you
>Lyra moves her head back a little and look at what you’re holding in your hand.
>Her eyes go extremely wide at the sight of the little glass bottle in between your fingers.
>”wh-h-how?”
I took a little walk to Zecora’s place.  She told me everything.
>”Anon, I-“
Let’s go back to my place before we discuss this.
>Lyra tries to speak up again, but you’re already turned around and headed to your house.
>It’s not very far, but it feels like you’ve walked for miles before you reach your front door.

>Lyra isn’t even walking at your side, she’s simply behind you looking at the ground.
>All the gas lamps in your house have been snuffed out and the light coming through the windows isn’t giving enough light.
Just go and sit at the table while I go light the lamps.
>Lyra doesn’t say anything, she simply walks past you and heads over to the kitchen.
>The lamps in your house were made for Minotaur’s, so every single one could either be light by hand or they could all be lit automatically from the basement.
>They offered you discount if you chose to not have the automatic system put in.  Which you jumped at like Mr. Cake looking for a reason to convince himself that Pound and Pumpkin are his foals.

>With all the lamps now lit you give  heavy sigh and you see Lyra sitting at the table.
>You pull yourself a chair in front of Lyra.
So what do you have to say?
>”….”
Well?
>”…”
…
>”I-I’m sorry…”
Are you?
>”Yes…”
If you’re sorry then you wouldn’t have kept this from me.  You would have told me that you weren't going to have a foal; that instead you’re going to have a little boy or a little girl.
>”Anon-“
Please.  Frankly this whole thing has to be the most dysfunctional thing I’ve ever been caught up in.  One night we drunkenly have sex and then the next day you start acting like we’re married or something.  Lyra I barely know you, but already I do not like what I DO know.  You go behind my back and you do some backwards dealing that hooked you up with a potion that get a mare pregnant after she’s fucked another species.
>Tears are starting to well up in the corners of her eyes.
You could have just asked me.  You could have asked me if I wanted to have a kid.  This could have been avoidable; and if I had gotten to know you I could have been alright with it.  I’m going to let in on a little secret.  I don’t know how stallions would react to this, but guy where I’m from don’t find pregnancy attractive.  The fact that you went behind my back makes you look dishonest and shady.
>”An-“
And I don’t want some shady, dishonest, phsycho mare to have my children!  Did you even CONSIDER how I would feel about all this?  Or were you just caught up in making your little fantasy a reality!?  Did you even think for a I second, that maybe I'd want something different!?  This isn't a fairtale Lyra!  You're not the only one here with feelings, and not everyone is going to want what you want!
>That’s all it took to have her knock her chair over and bolt out the door with tears running down her cheeks.
>For a moment you feel like something has been lifted from your shoulders, but at the same time your stomach drops.
>You have a terrible feeling that there will be no sleep for you.

----------

>It feel like something’s hollow in you.  You can hardly describe it but something doesn’t feel right.
>You can hardly close your eyes.  It feels like music strings are holding them open.
>Bringing your legs over the edge of your bed you rubs your temples before getting up.
>Maybe a little alcohol will knock you out.
>There’s a half empty bottle of whiskey you picked up when you went to Appaloosa.  After you down the first shot, you almost regret getting the eighty proof instead of the hundred.
>It’ll take more time for you to be off your ass.
>A single candle is on your table, which you’re tempted to spit in after the second shot, but you don’t because you heard a guy died trying to breathe fire with whiskey.
>It’s not long before your face starts to go numb along with the roof of your mouth.
>You down a third shot.
>Still waiting for the third shot to take affect you put the whiskey back in the cupboard.
>Moving around has made the effects of the whiskey speed up and now your thoroughly stumbling around.
>Food maybe?  Yeah food sounds good.  Wish they had Taco Bell here.
>Your vision blurs as you open the fridge.  Normally there’s nothing there except for some mustard and mayo, except this time you think you see something.
>It’s a plate, you know that much.  But what interests you is what’s on the plate.
>At this point you don’t even know what it is, but that doesn’t stop you wanting to eat it and taking it out.
>Not even a few steps away from the fridge, you feel you knees give way, causing you to come crashing down onto the floor, with the plate you are hold with you.
>After your head hits the floor everything goes black

----------

>Your head feels like it’s been split open with an axe and your eyes feel like acid has been poured on them.
>Except that hasn’t happened.  All that’s happened is you drank too much last night and your stupid ass slipped and cracked you head on the floor.
>You heave yourself up using the counted for leverage.
>Why do you do this to yourself.
>Good god what time is it.
>Seven fifty…
>A little light goes off in your brain.
>”SHIT!!”
>The shop opens at eight and you have work today.
>You quickly slap on a pair of pants before sprinting out the door.
>At the door of the shop, Bon Bon throws you an apron and say nothing.
>This is reminiscent of the entire day.

----------

>It’s about closing time and all day Bon Bon hasn’t said anything to you other than a few orders that needed to be filled.
You, uh wanna close shop or should I?
>”No.  I’ll do it.”
...
>”...”
Okay, what’s wrong with you?
>”You know what’s wrong.”
>You grit your teeth.
If this is abou-
>”Why don’t you head home, you still look hungover.”
>You avoid slamming the door on your way out, that doesn't stop you from using the door to shake your houses foundation when you get back.
>The fucking nerve of her, acting as if this whole thing is you fault!
>You begin punching the wall without breaking through it.
>What the fuck!?
>Punching it as hard as you can you feel pain jolt from your knuckles to your shoulder.  Studs aren’t meant to break Anon.
>Today fucking sucks.
>The only thing left to do is have some hair of the dog.

>What the?
>The entire floor of your kitchen is covered in noodles and all other kinds of shit.
>Being you’re a slob you take a noodle and eat it.
>Pad Thai... Who made this?
>Not that you’re complaining, it’s your favorite dish and there are even pieces of chicken on the floor.
>Still looking down you argue with yourself as to whether you should eat it or not until you see what looks like a little piece of paper.
>It’s under some noodle which has smeared the ink.
>It reads: Anon~<3
>You don’t need to ask who wrote this, or who made you this food...
>Maybe you made a mistake… Maybe you should go fix that mistake…
>You made a mistake… And now you need to go and fix that mistake…
>What!?
>After that chewing out you gave her?  After you gave her every reason why you didn't want to be with her?  And you're going to let go of that for a home cooked meal?
>Are you really that thick?
>You manage to avoid stepping into the broken pieces of china, and are able to get a broom and mop to clean this all up.

>It's getting late, you really should get to bet and sleep all of this off.
>You open take a glass and fill it with water before fiddling in your cupboard for a bottle of aspirin.
>Which you can't find.
>There's probably Aspiring in the library, buried in you desk.
>You shuffle past the glass doors leading to you office.
>This place is a disaster.
>There are books strewn everywhere,
>You can't remember the last time you cleaned this place up.
>Never is the answer.
>You fiddle around in your desk drawers for a few minutes before you kick yourself for not noticing the bottle right in the middle of the desk.
>Jesus, what's with all these papers.
>A dozen pieces of paper littler your desk, all resembling some sort of grocery list.
>The fuck is all of this?
>You randomly snatch one from the endless pile
>What is written on it makes your heart skip a beat.
>Names…
>Baby names…
>All of them human names.  Nothing a pony would ever name their child, and yet there they are.
>On the right are boys names: “Elii, Ian, William, Martin, Connor, Josef, Alphonse, Arthur.”
>But that’s only a fifth of the paper.  The rest of the page is filled with girls names: “Ella, Sophia, Lucy, Alice, Holly, Phoebe, Poppy.” And in bold marks with a dark underline: “Hope”…
>Hope.
>God fucking damnit.
>Stop likening that name so much.
>You can see Lyra sitting at this desk.  Pouring over your books, looking for names, for your child.
>…
>Just go to bed.  This will all pass once, you go to bed.
>No it won't
>Why do you have to be such a brick wall?
>Why can't you see that you can't live like this anymore
>...
>You know what to do.

----------

>You don’t need to ask where to go.  You know where to find her.
>The sun has already gone down.
>You can see her silhouette on a park bench.
>You can also hear her sobbing.
Lyra?
>She visibly jumps at hearing you and turns around.
>Her eyes are red a puffy, and her face is soaked with tears.
>”*sniff* Did you come here to try an- *sniff* get me to go to the hospital or something?”
No I-
>”Well you *sob* you don-don’t have to worry.  It’s too late, I-I havn’t taken the potion from you *sob*.”
>You make your way over to the park bench.
Mind if I sit here?
>”...”
>You sit next to Lyra who scoots as far away as possible.
>You let the awkward silence brew for a little bite
>Looking up at the sky you sigh heavily.
Lyra is out tonight... You know the constellation...
>”...”
>You pause before starting up again.
There’s an old human myth...
>”...”
That a crow took the lyre of Orpheus into the sky.
>”...”
They say when Orpheus’ wife died and went to the Underworld.  They said he was so sad, that played his lyre and the songs he played were so mournful that the nymphs and the gods wept.  They told him that if he went down to the Underworld and played for Hades, the god of the dead, that he could get his wife back.
>You begin to inch closer to Lyra.
When he played for Hades, they say his song was so mournful the even the heartless god of the dead began to weep.  He was then allowed to bring his wife back to the world of the living, but only if she walked behind him on the way back, and only if he did not look back at her until they had reach the world of the living.
>You pause.
But he was so afraid that she had not followed him, or that she had gotten lost, that he looked back... And she was dragged back to the Underworld.

>There's a long pause.
>Lyra has begun to cry again with her head in her hooves.
Lyra-
>”I thought you were different... I though you didn't think I was... Crazy, weird or... a psycho.  And when everyp0ny was laughing at me because you were f-flirting with Thunderlane that night... You made me feel better... You came to me and you held me that night... And I loved you so much- I-I wanted us to be together... I wanted to have foals with you, and I wanted us to grow old together...”
Lyra... I’m sorry.  I never said I didn't like you... I just... I just didn't want a child... I’m so sorry... I don't think you're crazy, or shady... I was just so mad, that I couldn't think straight...
>You hesitate before running your fingers through her mane.
I don't think you're crazy, I think you're not like the other ponies... And that's what I love about you.  Even if they laugh at you you're not afraid to... Be you.  Lyra I want to wake up every morning and look into those golden eyes, I want to listen to your Lyre in the evening.
>...
>”D-do you remember... When were in this park... One the night when we left the party...
I-
>Lyra shift over and lays her head onto your lap.
>”You told me Lyra was out.  And you told me about that human.  Orpheus.  You told me how you couldn't imagine how he felt.  And you never wanted to.”
>Is that-
>”And I told you, you wouldn't have to.  And when me made love under the stars... I thou- thought that we'd be together forever...  And I knew that I never loved anyp0ny more than you..”
>You feel Lyra's tears soaking into your pants as you stroke her mane.
I think it’s time we go home.

>You gently take Lyra into your arms and begin heading home.
>She’s wrapped her hooves around your neck.
>She’s hasn't stopped crying but her eyes are still red and swollen.
>When you two finally get home, you throw off one of your shoes and use your feet to turn the door knob.
>All the lights in the house are of save for the lamp one in your bedroom.
>You make sure that your other shoe is off before you make your way upstairs.
>With Lyra now asleep you lay down on you bed with her on your chest.

>You can feel her heart beat against your chest.
>Maybe you can make it happen.
>Maybe you won’t have a little boy or girl.
>Maybe you’ll have a little filly or colt.
>All that matters now is that she’s here with you.  And that she will always be with you.