(1) Gaynon: the slumber party

>Be anon
>Homosexual
>Not flaming, but it's just what you like.
>I don't really mind being the bottom, but I'm definitley not really feminine.
>Have a few friends, all of them are straight
>They don't seem to mind my orientation.
>Anyway, I've always been friends with a few of the popular girls, mostly Rarity and Pinkie Pie, sorta Fluttershy, but she doesn't talk much.
>Pinkie PIe is the first to tell me that she's throwing this massive sleepover, supposed to be an all night study session to cram for Midterms, but she wants to have some fun
>I suppose I could go, seeing as she did take the time to invite me
"But, I have to ask you first, why did you invite me?"
>"Because you're my friend silly!"
"Yeah, but it's not really normal for a guy to got to sleep overs with a bunch of girls."
>"Don't be silly anon, you don't even like girls!"
"Yeah but that doesn't mean I'm gonna go out and do the same things girls do.
>"Oh anon, you're so silly!"
>Pinkie Pie darts away enthusiastically
>Damn bitch
>This was shaping up to be a disaster already
>But it would be impolite to turn down the invitation.
>Guess my hands are tied.
>School lets out.
>Supposed to show up at Pinkie's around 7:30
>Just chill and smoke up for a little while, watch netflix, and eat a cold Bacon and Pepperoni pizza from Pizza Hut
>dasitmane.jpg
>7:15 rolls around
>Alright, guess it's time to get this show on the road
>Get dressed
>Nothing special, just a button-up and some jeans
>Pack an undershirt and gym shorts to sleep in
>Bring some munchies and a little mary jane just in case
>Shouldn't be to bad, right
>Show up
>*KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK*
>Rarity opens the door.
>"Oh darling! You look absolutely fabulous! But you didn't need to get all done up for a silly slumber party!"
"I'm.... not really done up...."
>"Well of course you are! People like you and me are partial to taking pride in our appearance!"
---
"How do you figure that?"
>"Well, what with your lifestyle and everything."
"Are talking about my sexuality?"
>"Well it's only natural for people like you to try to keep up appearances"
>This is going to be my life for the next 12 hours or so
>But, at the risk of sounding like an easily-triggered nazi of some sort, I shrug it off and turn the other cheek
"So anyway, can I go in?"
>"Of course, welcome, welcome!"
>Go inside
>Pretty nice setup, all the other girls from their posse are there.
>"Hey anon" says Rainbow Dash
>"Howdy anon"
>etc.
>etc.
>etc.
>After sparing me the formalities, I drop my duffle bag on the ground and sit on the bed
>Yep, all the girls, just talking about lipstick, clothes, normal bullcrap.
>"Anon, you're being awfully quiet" says Twilight. "How come you're not really in the conversation"
"Well, I mean, you aren't really talking about anything that really interests me.
>"But you know, with your..... um"
>Ohboyherewego
>"With your orientation and all, I'd think you would like talking about this kind of stuff..."
"You think that because of my sexual lifestyle that I'm inclined to like fashion, make up, and other girly girl things?"
>"Well it would only seem logical."
>Alright then
>I just stop talking and pull out my phone to jam out
>I may need to visit mary jane quicker than I thought
>But another part of my brain is telling me to give them a chance.
>Just gotta tough it out tonight
>It's only polite
---
>After about thirty minutes or so of their girl chatter, Rainbow Dash taps on my thigh
>"Hey anon, we're just about to play spin the bottle, why don't you join us?"
>ohmygeorgetakei
>This should be fun
"Yeah, why not?"
>Get on the floor, sitting next to Sunset Shimmer and Fluttershy
>"Alright, who wants to spin it?" asks Twilight.
>"Oooh, oooh, oooh! Let me! Let me!" Pinkie cheers enthusiastically.
>She whips the bottle around and it spins at least 50 times.
>It lands on twilight
>"Okay Twilight" says pinkie, thinking in head what she wants to do. "You have to tell us a secret, who do you have a crush on at Canterlot High?"
>"Pinkie, you know full well that I'm dating Flash Sentry." she replies
>"Oh yeah, right, can I go again?"
>"Nope, you wasted your turn, now it's mine."
>Twilight spins the bottle
>It lands on me
>"Okay anon...." she says while trying to come up with something to give me.
>"Why don't you...."
>Oh boy this is going to be lame af
>"Go streaking down the street!"
>Oh well I suppose WAIT WHAT?
"Twilight, I'm not going to do that!"
>"Why? It's the rules you have to do it blah blah blah."
"Well, first of all it's only 8:00 at night, there are still people out. Secondly, I'm not getting naked in front of you girls, and third...."
>"We don't have a problem with it. I mean, it's not like it's anything sexual or anything" Rainbow Dash chimes in.
"That's irrelevant. It's just ettiquette that you don't get naked in front of the opposite sex. I mean, it's the classy thing to do. I'm not some uncouth urchin."
>"Anon, you're not even attracted to girls, I don't see why you have such a stigma against it."
>They really aren't listening.
"I'm not doing it"
>"Well, alright. Fine. I guess I'll just spin the bottle and land on someone else"
>Yeah you do that.
>After it's over, I grab my bag.
>"You know anon, you're turning out to be quite the party pooper" Rainbow Dash says to me
---
>I'm kinda pissed now, not triggered, but pissed
>Yep, me and mary jane are gonna get some alone time
"Sorry that you feel that way, I'll be right back."
>Go out of the back door and roll me a blunt on Rarity's back porch.
>Smoke up, chomp on some doritos and try to clear my head.
"It's not so bad.... I mean, they just think of me as a stereo type. Then again, they can't really help it, it's not their fault." I begin to say out loud.
>"Hey anon, are you coming back?"
>It's Rarity
>"Oh my goodness darling! What on earth are you doing?!"
>She's staring at my blunt
"Avin' a smoke."
>"You caan't do that on my property, it's illegal!"
"Naww it's cool, turns out I have glaucoma" I say, trying to keep myself from busting out laughing.
>"You know, I would think a person like yourself would have a little more class than that!"
"Is it unclassy to smoke weed? I never knew." I say rather dryly
>"Hmph. I would've expected someone like you to have a little more respect to a lady. I mean, you practically are one."
"Are you fucking serious?!"
>Aww shit, I didn't meant to say that out loud, just in my head.
>Rarity just looks like she got shot.
>"How.... how dare you erupt to me like that?! I can't believe you would do such a thing!"
>Before I have a chance to explain myself, she turns around and walks away.
>What a snobby thot.
>Damn, maybe I am more saucy than I thought.
>Welp, better do some damage control
>I finish smoking and head inside.
---
>I arrive back into the bedroom
>Everyone there is silent, some of them, namely Applejack and Rainbow Dash, shoot me an icy glare
>Rarity must've told them.
>Rarity just looks at me for a second then turns her head and sticks her nose up in the air.
>Alright I see where this is heading
"Look, I'm sorry I blew up on you like that Rarity. I didn't mean it. But listen, when I'm telling you, not just you specifically, but everybody, that I'm not into all this girly bullcrap, I'm telling you the truth."
>Things are starting to ease up now.
"It's fine that you want me to be here, but don't just pretend that I'm some cardboard cutout flaming homo or something."
>I turn back to Rarity
"So, we're still friends right?"
>She softens up a bit
>"Ahh well, I suppose so darling. I can understand why you would get upset. I forgive you"
"How about you guys, no hard feelings, right?"
>"Yeah, it's cool, no hard feelings, etc. etc."
"Alright, sweet."
>"You know, you don't have to stay here if you don't want to." Twilight says.
>"Yeah!" chimes in Pinkie, "If you really don't feel like you're having a great time, then we don't wanna keep you here."
"Well, I mean, I could stay, just as long as we keep things interesting"
>Interesting how?
"Well, maybe we could liven up the party a little, if you guys don't mind..."
>"Yeah, I guess that's fine" Pinkie responds
>I call up my homeboys that have the connections for all the weed you can smoke and all the liquor you can down without dying.
>They show up in like 10 minutes
>Drop off at least 20 bottles of rum, vodka, whiskey, gin, you name it.
>Some good weed too
---
>Some of them are hesitant at first, but Pinkie is the first to dive in, so the others slowly start to try it out.
>Turns out they can turn up when it's time to turn up.
>We got music, weed, and I end up ordering some pizza and tacos and stuff, all on me
>Things getting wild
>Someone ends up calling the cops
>We convince Pinkie to go down there with a straight face and tell them we're just here studying.
>Now she normally laughs like an idiot just because, but on weed, she though everything was absolutely side splitting.
>She opens the door
>And with a totally straight face says:
>"Oh, hey Mr. Police Officer! Is there something I can help you with?"
>the rest of us are hanging out on the stairs watching the whole thing
>>"Yeah, we've been getting reports of loud music going on at this house, is everything okay?
>"Yeperooni. Just a small study group going on."
>She isn't showing the slightest bit of effects of the weed or alcohol.
>>"Are you sure? There was also a reported smell of weed earlier..."
>All of the girls look at me
>I try my best to keep from laughing maniacilly and falling down the stairs
>"Oh, we're not smoking anything, here you can even smell my breath."
>What, what the crap is che doing, he'sgonna smell the weed on her.
>She blows in his face
>He winces a little
>He turns to his partner
>>"Smells like cake frosting."
>"See, I told you, nothing illegal going on here."
>He stares at her for a few moments
>>"Alright, I guess you seem alright"
>The cops turn and walk back to the car
>They drive off
>After which pinkie slams the door and begins laughing so hard that she falls on the floor clutching her sides
>The rest of us begin laughing like morons, I actually do fall down the stairs, and laugh some more
>We just continue smoking and drinking throughout the night
>Midterms roll around
>We fail miserably
>But I got turnt up with some of the most popular girls in school
>Maybe girls aren't so bad after all