Falling apart

[This is a ripped journal page One keeps in his room, somewhere. He won't tell why he still keep this page.]

I'm afraid... I'll lose my sanity.

They are here they are here they are here they are here they are here they ar [erased]

They're seeing my every movement they're seeing it all, they're telling me to shut up and let them take control of me again, just like 'The Pandora' day, like 'Sealing' day, they want to feel the world once again. They promised to me they'll recover my memory, all of them, they promised to me I'll feel that feeling again, I'll remember my life, my name, my age, just everything I've missed all this time

I can feel them eating away my soul, gnawing on my body, gaining control one tissue at a time, I can feel the clock ticking and it's only a matter of time until I snapped out and become the true self again, my true form, that I've keep hidden from my friends and loved ones [erased] They'll suffer because of me

I've told Wishing Well to kill me if I went out of control, I hope he will obey it and kill me. I don't want to become a burden to Xenon and my friends, I'm willing to do the sacrifice if it's needed. I just want her to be happy. I want all of my friends to be happy. Even if that means I'm going to be dead. I'm ready for it

I still missed her, my love, that I killed in "Pandora"... I felt her blood in my skin, I saw her corpse splitted in two [erased] She's smiling peacefully like she's sleeping, her long auburn hair splattered with her own blood. We've made a promise to escape "Pandora" and start a new life deep in the rurals, just the two of us, I've failed her, and I've failed myself

[A bunch of random scribbles and erased bits filled the page until the bottom margins]

They are here.
Waiting.
For the chance to destroy me once more. For the chance to destroy my life again.
I need help.