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matty406
Jul 31st, 2012
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  1.  
  2. FACADE STAGEPLAY
  3. Tue Jul 31 20 33 44 2012
  4.  
  5. GRACE
  6. Trip, when are you going to get rid of this?
  7.  
  8. TRIP
  9. What, Grace... this?
  10.  
  11. GRACE
  12. Yes, you know how I feel about it -- -- (interrupted)
  13.  
  14. (Matt knocks on the front door.)
  15.  
  16. (Matt knocks on the front door.)
  17.  
  18. (Matt knocks on the front door.)
  19.  
  20. (Matt knocks on the front door.)
  21.  
  22. (Matt knocks on the front door.)
  23.  
  24. TRIP
  25. I know I know I'll do -- (interrupted)
  26.  
  27. (Matt knocks on the front door.)
  28.  
  29. (Matt knocks on the front door.)
  30.  
  31. TRIP
  32. Uhp, he's here!
  33.  
  34. (Matt knocks on the front door.)
  35.  
  36. (Matt knocks on the front door.)
  37.  
  38. GRACE
  39. What?! You told me it'd be an hour from now!
  40.  
  41. TRIP
  42. No, he's supposed to be here now!
  43.  
  44. GRACE
  45. God... Trip!
  46.  
  47. (Trip opens the front door.)
  48.  
  49. (Matt knocks on the front door.)
  50.  
  51. TRIP
  52. Matt!!
  53.  
  54. MATT
  55. WE NEED BEER
  56.  
  57. TRIP
  58. Ah I'm so happy you could make it! -- (interrupted)
  59.  
  60. MATT
  61. TRIP
  62.  
  63. TRIP
  64. Uh...
  65.  
  66. TRIP
  67. Well come on in...
  68.  
  69. MATT
  70. GET BEER
  71.  
  72. TRIP
  73. Uh, it'll be just a sec while I go get Grace...
  74.  
  75. (MATT knocks on the front door.)
  76.  
  77. (MATT closes the front door.)
  78.  
  79. TRIP
  80. (unintelligable arguing)
  81.  
  82. TRIP
  83. (unintelligable arguing)
  84.  
  85. TRIP
  86. (unintelligable arguing)
  87.  
  88. GRACE
  89. Matt,
  90.  
  91. MATT
  92. WE ALL KNOW WHY I'M HERE.
  93.  
  94. GRACE
  95. Hi! How are you? God it's been a while! -- (interrupted)
  96.  
  97. GRACE
  98. Oh, ha ha ha!
  99.  
  100. GRACE
  101. By the way, you look wonderful!
  102.  
  103. GRACE
  104. Well, come on in, make yourself at home!
  105.  
  106. MATT
  107. I SAW THE NEWSPAPER ADVERT
  108.  
  109. GRACE
  110. Yeah, I'm hoping you can help me understand where I went wrong with my new decorating, -- (interrupted)
  111.  
  112. MATT
  113. WHEN DOES IT BEGIN
  114.  
  115. TRIP
  116. Well wait a minute! I don't think you've taken a close look yet. Let it soak in a little!
  117.  
  118. GRACE
  119. So, about my decorating... -- (interrupted)
  120.  
  121. MATT
  122. BEER
  123.  
  124. TRIP
  125. Oh, yeah, I'm gonna fix us some drinks in a sec!
  126.  
  127. TRIP
  128. Ah, you need to help me break in my expensive new set of cocktail making accessories. -- (interrupted)
  129.  
  130. MATT
  131. TRIP, BEER
  132.  
  133. TRIP
  134. Yeah, hang on, ooh, I'm going to make you one of my fabulous drinks in just a minute!
  135.  
  136. GRACE
  137. Uhh, Matt, try not to encourage him. -- (interrupted)
  138.  
  139. MATT
  140. NO, BEER
  141.  
  142. GRACE
  143. You don't agree...
  144.  
  145. GRACE
  146. (little sigh) So about this wedding picture here...
  147.  
  148. GRACE
  149. it obviously just does not go anymore... I mean, with my new decorating and all.
  150.  
  151. TRIP
  152. Oh, Grace...
  153.  
  154. TRIP
  155. (little impatient sigh)
  156.  
  157. MATT
  158. We need to loosen up
  159.  
  160. TRIP
  161. See, Grace, no one has a problem with your decorating, it's fine!
  162.  
  163. GRACE
  164. Well, I plan to return most of this anyhow. This room needs to be redone.
  165.  
  166. TRIP
  167. (little sigh)
  168.  
  169. TRIP
  170. So! Drinks!
  171.  
  172. TRIP
  173. How about a martini?
  174.  
  175. TRIP
  176. I'm a real expert -- (interrupted)
  177.  
  178. MATT
  179. Here, I have some of the good stuf
  180.  
  181. TRIP
  182. Beautiful!
  183.  
  184. GRACE
  185. No no,
  186.  
  187. GRACE
  188. Matt, maybe you'd like some juice, or a mineral water?
  189.  
  190. TRIP
  191. Oh come on...
  192.  
  193. MATT
  194. Well I just had a coffee
  195.  
  196. TRIP
  197. You know what why I don't I just open a bottle of merlot and make it easy.
  198.  
  199. GRACE
  200. Yes, sometimes a simple glass of wine is better than those fancy drinks you always insist on making.
  201.  
  202. TRIP
  203. Grace, I assume you want your usual... 'a lovely, very cold glass of Chardonnay'.
  204.  
  205. GRACE
  206. The merlot sounds fine.
  207.  
  208. TRIP
  209. Oh! Uh... Okay.
  210.  
  211. MATT
  212. MERLOT
  213.  
  214. TRIP
  215. Oh, Matt, take a look at -- (interrupted)
  216.  
  217. PHONE
  218. ** RING **
  219.  
  220. TRIP
  221. Oh, I'll get it --
  222.  
  223. GRACE
  224. No, no, we have a guest, we can let the answering machine pick it up.
  225.  
  226. PHONE
  227. ** RING **
  228.  
  229. MATT
  230. HOLY SHIT
  231.  
  232. GRACE
  233. What? Oh, God, can we just -- let's just wait for the answering machine...!
  234.  
  235. PHONE
  236. ** RING **
  237.  
  238. (MATT picks up the phone.)
  239.  
  240. PHONE
  241. Grace? Hello?
  242.  
  243. GRACE
  244. Matt, no! Please don't do that.
  245.  
  246. MATT
  247. hello
  248.  
  249. PHONE
  250. Who is this? Grace is that you?
  251.  
  252. GRACE
  253. Uhh, it's my dad, I can hear his voice.
  254.  
  255. PHONE
  256. I don't recognize your voice...
  257.  
  258. TRIP
  259. Oh!
  260.  
  261. PHONE
  262. Excuse me, I must have the wrong number... ** click **
  263.  
  264. GRACE
  265. Okay, he's being annoying, as usual... just -- just hang it up.
  266.  
  267. (MATT puts down the phone.)
  268.  
  269. GRACE
  270. Oh, good, you hung up. I can call him back later, or in a few days, heh.
  271.  
  272. MATT
  273. And that's how you deal with it
  274.  
  275. TRIP
  276. Well, Grace's parents... They're something else, really classy people --
  277.  
  278. GRACE
  279. Uhh, no, they're impossible, they're always expecting me to act like the dutiful daughter, it's so annoying.
  280.  
  281. TRIP
  282. (frustrated sigh)
  283.  
  284. GRACE
  285. Well, we're all friends here...
  286.  
  287. TRIP
  288. Oh, Matt, I thought you might like this photo I just put up from our recent trip to Italy.
  289.  
  290. GRACE
  291. Uhh, it's a beautiful picture of the Italian countryside, of course he'll like it!
  292.  
  293. MATT
  294. YES
  295.  
  296. GRACE
  297. Oh yes, yes, go look at Trip's Italy photo...
  298.  
  299. MATT
  300. VERY NICE PHOTO
  301.  
  302. TRIP
  303. Heh, oh, well --
  304.  
  305. GRACE
  306. Ah it's good to see you two getting along so well.
  307.  
  308. TRIP
  309. (clears throat)
  310.  
  311. GRACE
  312. Matt, this is making you uncomfortable. See Trip, was it really worth it to fly us all the way to Italy so you could take that inane picture?
  313.  
  314. GRACE
  315. (little sigh) I'll take the picture down later tonight before I go to bed.
  316.  
  317. TRIP
  318. Grace...!
  319.  
  320. TRIP
  321. (short petulant sigh)
  322.  
  323. TRIP
  324. Matt, this trip to Italy was meant to be our second honeymoon.
  325.  
  326. GRACE
  327. Oh, was that what it was? Huh, I'm always the last to know.
  328.  
  329. MATT
  330. Grace, who is your favourite pony?
  331.  
  332. TRIP
  333. Wait wait wait -- see, uh -- I just wanted us to spend time together!
  334.  
  335. GRACE
  336. Trip thinks carting me off to Europe will, how did you put it, thaw me out a little bit?
  337.  
  338. TRIP
  339. Ahh, this is bullshit!
  340.  
  341. GRACE
  342. Ahh, no, you're full of shit!
  343.  
  344. GRACE
  345. Thaw me out...
  346.  
  347. GRACE
  348. Trip, you think you're so romantic... but no you're trying to manipulate me!
  349.  
  350. MATT
  351. Yo, don;t swear, motherfuckers
  352.  
  353. GRACE
  354. What?!? That's awful, where did that come from? You're acting ridiculous!
  355.  
  356. TRIP
  357. Your goddamn parents...
  358.  
  359. TRIP
  360. You think you're better than me just because I didn't come from a rich background! You do, I know it, you think you're better than me!
  361.  
  362. GRACE
  363. Oh, God...!
  364.  
  365. GRACE
  366. Goddamn second honeymoon...
  367.  
  368. GRACE
  369. Trip, our whole marriage, you're so... controlling!
  370.  
  371. TRIP
  372. Oh, Jesus...!
  373.  
  374. GRACE
  375. Okay, you know what, Matt,
  376.  
  377. GRACE
  378. I need to ask you something.
  379.  
  380. TRIP
  381. Grace --
  382.  
  383. GRACE
  384. Trip, let me ask our guest a question.
  385.  
  386. MATT
  387. SHOOT
  388.  
  389. GRACE
  390. Matt, yes or no...
  391.  
  392. GRACE
  393. In a marriage, shouldn't you try to help the other person get what they want?
  394.  
  395. MATT
  396. yes
  397.  
  398. TRIP
  399. What...?! -- (interrupted)
  400.  
  401. TRIP
  402. Oh, alright... yeah...
  403.  
  404. TRIP
  405. Uhh, I try so hard to reach out to you, Grace, and you reject me! You're cold! You're distant! I can't keep going this way, it's killing me!
  406.  
  407. GRACE
  408. Oh, don't even...!
  409.  
  410. GRACE
  411. Uhh! Yeah, good, get away from me!
  412.  
  413. GRACE
  414. I can't stand you!
  415.  
  416. GRACE
  417. Goddammit!
  418.  
  419. MATT
  420. Well as we can see, Trip is a ghost
  421.  
  422. GRACE
  423. What? What are you saying?
  424.  
  425. TRIP
  426. Grace, are you talking about me?
  427.  
  428. GRACE
  429. I'm not talking to you!
  430.  
  431. GRACE
  432. Matt, I can't believe you have to see this...
  433.  
  434. (MATT comforts grace.)
  435.  
  436. TRIP
  437. Matt, in what you said before, about saying yes... I think we've already learned something about Grace.
  438.  
  439. GRACE
  440. Oh, we're talking about me again, are we?
  441.  
  442. TRIP
  443. What?
  444.  
  445. TRIP
  446. Grace, even though you're now a creative director at work, and even though you redecorate the apartment all the time, the truth is... you're not an artist.
  447.  
  448. GRACE
  449. Uhh...!
  450.  
  451. TRIP
  452. I'm sorry, you're not.
  453.  
  454. GRACE
  455. Matt, uhh...
  456.  
  457. (MATT sits on the couch.)
  458.  
  459. MATT
  460. Trip where's that god damn Merlot
  461.  
  462. (MATT gets up from the couch.)
  463.  
  464. TRIP
  465. Matt, come on, I don't feel like fixing drinks at this moment!
  466.  
  467. GRACE
  468. Let's keep talking about Trip.
  469.  
  470. TRIP
  471. See, what I've tried to do, -- (interrupted)
  472.  
  473. MATT
  474. bitch you promised a Merlot
  475.  
  476. GRACE
  477. God, Matt, can we just stop talking about Trip's stuff, please? (frustrated sigh)
  478.  
  479. GRACE
  480. No let's -- let's focus on us, our relationship.
  481.  
  482. GRACE
  483. Trip, can't you see, it's the way you speak, the way you talk to me...!
  484.  
  485. TRIP
  486. What, I'm not allowed to be angry?
  487.  
  488. GRACE
  489. You tell me what to do, you don't listen.
  490.  
  491. TRIP
  492. Matt, I'm not telling her what to do, I'm trying to help her!
  493.  
  494. GRACE
  495. Let's keep talking about us, our relationship.
  496.  
  497. TRIP
  498. Grace, we don't -- we don't have to do this... things are okay, we can just --
  499.  
  500. GRACE
  501. Matt, I can't stand the pretending anymore... I can't take it!
  502.  
  503. TRIP
  504. No, Grace, we can... I mean, come on, don't make it out to be so bad...
  505.  
  506. GRACE
  507. Uhh...
  508.  
  509. MATT
  510. Let's drop the bass
  511.  
  512. TRIP
  513. Let's talk some more about us both.
  514.  
  515. (MATT sits on the couch.)
  516.  
  517. TRIP
  518. You know, I can't say Grace never acts loving towards me...
  519.  
  520. TRIP
  521. Matt, She's all over me at our goddamn parties, trying to look good in front of the guests!
  522.  
  523. (MATT gets up from the couch.)
  524.  
  525. GRACE
  526. No, I, I -- I want us to focus on Trip.
  527.  
  528. TRIP
  529. Matt, you know, it's weird to me, when I'm on a business trip, Grace never calls me, ever!
  530.  
  531. GRACE
  532. Uhh... -- (interrupted)
  533.  
  534. MATT
  535. I know what we need
  536.  
  537. TRIP
  538. What?
  539.  
  540. GRACE
  541. Ah, you want to know more... see, that might help him...
  542.  
  543. TRIP
  544. Uh, what?! I, I -- I, I mean, why, is -- is it something I'm... uhh...
  545.  
  546. MATT
  547. I have some friends with abilities
  548.  
  549. TRIP
  550. Look, let's not focus on just me or you, let's talk about us both.
  551.  
  552. TRIP
  553. It's so annoying... Grace, why is it that anytime I want to do something nice for you, you resist it?
  554.  
  555. GRACE
  556. Trip...
  557.  
  558. TRIP
  559. Like I always have to convince you?
  560.  
  561. GRACE
  562. Matt, you know, we... uhh...
  563.  
  564. MATT
  565. In the words of Pinkie Pie:
  566.  
  567. GRACE
  568. Let's talk some more about us, our relationship.
  569.  
  570. TRIP
  571. You know what makes me so angry?
  572.  
  573. MATT
  574. "Smile, bitch"
  575.  
  576. TRIP
  577. Okay, Matt, I think this evening is over, you've got to leave.
  578.  
  579. MATT
  580. shit son
  581.  
  582. TRIP
  583. Matt, we're through messing around, you've got to go.
  584.  
  585. (MATT knocks on the front door.)
  586.  
  587. (MATT opens the front door.)
  588.  
  589. MATT
  590. Fine
  591.  
  592. (MATT knocks on the front door.)
  593.  
  594. (MATT knocks on the front door.)
  595.  
  596. (MATT knocks on the front door.)
  597.  
  598. (MATT knocks on the front door.)
  599.  
  600. (MATT knocks on the front door.)
  601.  
  602. (MATT knocks on the front door.)
  603.  
  604. (MATT knocks on the front door.)
  605.  
  606. (MATT knocks on the front door.)
  607.  
  608. (MATT knocks on the front door.)
  609.  
  610. MATT
  611. I'm taking this wine
  612.  
  613. (MATT picks up the red wine bottle.)
  614.  
  615. MATT
  616. Actually keep the wine
  617.  
  618. (MATT puts down the red wine bottle.)
  619.  
  620. (MATT points to the elevator button.)
  621.  
  622. (MATT points to the elevator button.)
  623.  
  624. (MATT points to the elevator button.)
  625.  
  626. (MATT points to the elevator button.)
  627.  
  628. (MATT points to the elevator button.)
  629.  
  630. (MATT points to the elevator button.)
  631.  
  632. (MATT points to the elevator button.)
  633.  
  634. MATT
  635. Fuck
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