Anon and Friend In Equestria pt. 3 (reformated)

>Loud smacking sounds gradually pull you from slumber.
>*Smack smack smack*
>You groggily pull one of the your pillows over your head.
>*smack smack smack smack*
>You dig your fingers into the pillow, irritated.
>*smack smack*
>You huff loudly and sit up, pillow in hand.
>Daniel is sitting next to you with some kind of snack bar.
>"I'll tell you man, the fuckin' granola bars here are delicious. Nothing like that processed shit back home."
>As he speaks, bits of food fly out and lodge themselves into his beard.
>"I told you we could get here. YOU didn't wanna come, but look at us now! Haha!"
>You stare at him.
>"Ahem. 'Gee, Danny, you're awesome for including me, but however did you pull it off?' Excellent question, Anon! I figured out how to rig a car to travel between multiverses. Don't ask how, I don't remember everything that happens during my smoking sessions. Anyway, so you can't make it work without some serious speed, so I borrowed my dealer's Ford Mustang. He wasn't gonna miss it, he has like, three of 'em, so I hooked it up, pushed that bitch to , what, 120 mph? And bam! Here we are! Good thing that shit worked too, or else we woulda been Capital bank's new paint job. Got a few broken bones, but it was worth it, huh?"
>He gestures to his right arm, fully casted and in a sling.
>" Hey, dude? You don't look so good..."
>You hit him with the pillow.
>Once.
>"Hey!"
>Twice.
>"Cut it out!"
>You drop it start swinging with your fists.
"YOU STUPID SON OF A BITCH YOU COULD HAVE KILLED ME WITH YPUR BULLSHIT HOW THE FUCK DO YOU STEAL FROM A FUCKING DRUG DEALER AND RIP OFF BACK TO THE FUTURE I GOING TO FUCKING END YOU"
>During your slew of violence and obscenities, you clip his broken arm.
>He cries out, and takes a swing at your hanging leg.
>It connects, the pulley gives out and your leg falls, knocking your broken tibula out of place again.
>You scream in pain as Nurse Redheart and the guard enter the room again.
>"Stop at once! Guard, escort the other one back to his room. There will be NO roughhousing in my hospital, no matter how big you are!"
>The guard ushers Daniel through the half size door and a blue unicorn enters.
>"Help me reset his leg, will you?"
>She nods and steps closer to you.
>You're surrounded by a soft white aura.
> You feel the pain melt away as Nurse Redheart begins to remove your cast.
----
>15 minutes later, your leg is once and propped up in a new cast.
>Call them anything you like,but inefficient isn't one of them.
>And after a chastising from both nurses, you are not allowed to be alone anymore.
>Two of the Royal Guard, a grey unicorn and a white Pegasus, are at either side ofthe room.
>You can't even use the bathroom alone, even if you had the power to.
>Judging by the strange looks you were given during and after, they didn't want to be there either.
>The next few days are uneventful, with the exception of Twilight coming in every few hours to ask more questions.
>Nurse Redheart would chat with you occasionally, but it dwindled down after she had to give you a sponge bath.
>They were nice enough to wash Mcdick's uniform too.
>How you wished you had something else to wear.
>The fourth day comes around and the two nurses come to remove your cast.
>In five minutes, they have your leg free and unscathed.
>You cautiously flex your leg.
>It's stiff, yet functional, almost as if you never broke it.
>As they proceed to remove your other bandages, Nurse RedHeart speaks.
>"As soon as we're done here, Miss Sparkle would like you exit the room and go with her."
>You nod and inspect your skin.
>Most of the smaller cuts had disappeared, some of the deeper cuts left a silhouette .
>The two nurses step away and you rise.
>A bit wobbly, but you'll live.
>You throw on your shoes and glance at the door.
>You were right, it barely comes past your collarbone.
>You walk across the room, minding the ceiling fan and squeeze through the small frame.
>Twilight casts a surprised look over her shoulder.
>"Oh! Sorry about the size. We don't usually get anyone your size around here."
>She points her hoof towards Daniel, who stood in front of her with a goofy smile plastered on his face.
>He waves with his newly fixed arm.
>He never was one to hold a grudge.
>"We had to have the guards push him from the other side to get him through!"
>He pats his gut.
>He was only 20 lbs heavier than you.
>You hear the door close behind You.
>The guards had followed you out and were now flanking you.
>"Enough chit-chat, we need to see the Princess. Follow me, please."
>Twilight walks past you, two more guards right on her tail.
>You and Daniel follow, and as you do, Daniel frantically taps your shoulder.
>"You seein' this?" He whispers.
>He points at the purple mare.
"Please tell me you're not pointing at her ass."
>"What? No, man. Her wings, man! Where are they?"
>You ignore the suspicious glare from a guard.
"I don't know, man."
>You'd thought about this a few times.
>Something was wrong.
>What if you two ended up in some fucked up alternate universe?
>What if you and Danny were just in some alley somewhere hallucinating?
>Unease creeps it's way up your spine.
>"...glad you two are somewhat intelligent."
>Somewhat?
"What?"
>"I performed a small test on you two to see if you were of at average pony intelligence, or at least to see if you could spell."
>"Was that why you asked me how to spell stuff like kneecap?"
>She paused.
>"...Yes. Hence the 'at least to see if you could spell' part. Seriously, did you not think I knew what a kneecap or elbow was?"
>"...You asked, dude."
>A loud sigh was heard as you exited the hospital.
>You shield your eyes from the sunlight as Daniel casts you a glance and opens his mouth again.
>"Hey Twilight?"
>"Yes?"
>"Who did you say you were again?"
>She stops on the steps and slowly turns to look at him.
>"Ahem. My name. is Twilight. Sparkle."
>She speaks slowly and deliberately.
>"I am the prized student for the Princess. That's all you need to know."
>You notice a horse drawn carriage with some sort of flat bed with a four foot tall gate attached to the back.
>"You too will be sitting back here since we don't have a carriage big enough for you. Try not to move to much, ok? You'll fall out and hurt yourselves."
>Two of the guards pull down the gate as Twilight enters the carriage.
>You approach the flatbed and catch a strong wiff of hay and fertilizer.
"Do you guys use this for the cows or something?"
>They shrug.
>"Just get in."
>Daniel was already in and propped up against the gate.
>You visibly cringe as you shuffle onto the flatbed, keeping a close eye out for any shit.
>The guards follow you in and close the gate behind them.
>You don't see anything too unsavory, soyou sit down next to Daniel.
>That fucking grin is still on his face.
>The carriage jolts forward.
>You grow more uneasy as a few passersby gawk at you.
>You turn to Daniel.
"How can you be this rela--AAAAH!"
>The entire cart lifts from the ground quite suddenly and elevates quickly.
>The flatbed should be hanging, but it too, flies upright as if it was apart of the carriage.
>Physics don't apply here, apparently.
>You grip the the gates untill your knuckles turn white.
>Daniel laughs and peers over the edge.
>"Sit back down, sir. This is dangerous."
>He stays put, making a disgusting noise and spitting over the edge.
>One of the guards's horn glows, and Danny is suddenly on his ass.
>"Stay seated, or I will be forced to be more aggressive."
>He brushes the threat off and kicks back.
>"God, this would be great if I had a blunt right now."
>His eyes widen.
>"Shit, where am I going to get my fix?"
"You didn't think of that before you stole your dealer's car?"
>He jolts upward.
>"No, I did! I left it in the car!"
>You glance at the guards, who are collectively confused.
"I doubt you'll be able to get it now."
>"That's fuckin' quitter's talk! We're getting that bud, man!"
"How, Daniel? How!? The car is most likely totalled or, on the off chance it isn't, one of these ponies have it! What's your game plan, huh? Cause honestly, it isn't looking good."
>"Just cause a girl ain't pretty, don't mean you can't fuck her."
"...what the FUCK are you talking about!?"
>He nods his head and lays back again.
>The high altitude must be fucking with his head.