depression

Joe Rogan:
The point that a lot of people say I just want to sort of like they are kind of dabbling in the idea of improving themselves. And the real way to do it is you got to write down what the fuck you want and then go after it, because otherwise you’re living sort of a wishy-washy world. You know if you decide I’m going to get down to bang, I’m going to do this, I’m going to run a marathon in less than five hours, I’m going to – you know whatever the fuck it is you’ve got to write that shit down and go for it.

What I tell people is the best advice I’ve ever heard, the best advice I ever came up with, is that live your life like you’re the hero in your movie and right now, is when the fucking movie starts and your life is a shit bag disaster like every fucking Arnold Schwarzenegger movie where he wakes up and makes a blender full of pizza and ice cream and that’s what the – you know what I mean those guys where they’re like on the brink, they put the gun in their mouth and put it down, because they see a photo of their daughter, pretend that’s you.

Pretend you are right now, you are in the part of that movie that starts and it shows you as a fucking loser, and just decide not to be a loser anymore. Live your life like there’s a documentary crew following you around and you are analyzing your own behavior. Do what you would want to do, so that your kids one day would look back at it and see that documentary, and look on it with pride, like: “Wow my dad was a bad motherfucker; he really did what he had to do.” “Wow my mom really got her shit together.” I’d love a success story, but even more than a success story, I like a dude who fucks his life up and then gets it back together again story. Those are my favorite stories.

And the way to do that, you’ve got to write shit down, you’ve got to think that you are the hero in your own fucking movie and then you’ve got to sit down and write shit down. Write down what you need to do.

Male Speaker:
Most people play the role of the victim in the movie, right.

Joe Rogan:
Sure, this life is fucking me over, man I could have had this and I should have that and why does this guy get that and why does that guy get this, all things that are completely unrelated to you. All things that you find other peoples success is a downfall in your own existence. Instead of being inspired, instead of choosing to be positive, instead of like improving constantly on the direction of trying to achieve whatever the fuck you have written down. You just sit around and spiral. You know.

There is nothing more miserable than sitting around someone who is fucking complaining all the time; it is one of the most annoying things ever. Everybody hates it, when someone just sits around and they complain about their life and they don’t do jack shit about it. And you tiptoe around it, you don’t know what to say, well she gets upset when you bring that up I don’t want to bring that up and you want to go you fucking crazy bitch you know what’s wrong with your life, stop – stop announcing it to everybody else and go out and fix that shit.

Male Speaker:
And its tough love.

Joe Rogan: Source: LYBIO.net
Tough love is and what everybody needs me included. That’s the problem with human beings man, is that there’s a broad spectrum of us and the broad spectrum is necessary in order to have this sort of a complex society. Until we invent robots that are going to do shitty jobs, we are going to need monkeys, we are going to need dumb-fucking people, we are going to need idiots. You know.

That’s a terrible way to look at the world and it doesn’t necessarily mean that anybody born into the idiot family has to be an idiot, it doesn’t mean that the idiots can’t like snap out of it, somehow they do mushrooms or take a yoga class or try to look at their life in a different way, but for many people the reason why they’re idiots is not necessarily that their brain doesn’t work that well. So they got in a terrible pattern like really early in life, and they have become a dumb-fuck, and they are stuck and they live with a bunch of other dumb fucks. So they get all this negative energy all this time.

They are constantly dealing with conflicts at home that are meaning less, but distract them from of getting good at anything in life or from getting your own personal shit together, because all your energy is being diverted towards conflicts, like that’s why its so important to not have negative people in your life, because if you are trying to evolve and I think I know you are and I am and all of our friends are, everyone is trying to improve as a person, its very difficult to fucking figure out how to be a person, its very difficult to figure out how to manage your energy and know when you are wrong and know when you are being upset for no reason, it’s a tricky thing. You know –

And one of the most important things about it is you need to pay attention, you need to have time to think about your own interactions with other people, think about like the way you behave or think about the way you think, think about like the direction that you’re moving in the world. It takes a long time, it takes a lot of energy, and if your energy is being spent constantly doing with bullshit.

Adam Carolla:
The feeling I have toward my family and in terms of negativity, this is the number one thing where I think, I have a gift, I have ability, I have something to share with the world, and you assholes were going to watch me dig ditches or fucking roof houses in Van Nuys for the rest of my life. Goddamn. That’s what you tried. You didn’t burn calories doing it, but you still set me on a course where you took my voice and you basically doused it with sand and said “go ahead and get on a roof.” and I mean, when I said to my dad, I’m digging ditches for a living. He was like yeah, okay, what about it? There was never a second where anyone said, “Hey man, you got something there. You should write that down. That’s a good one.”

The advice I would give is you’re never going to feel the way, my buddy Donny in the next room feels about himself, because he grew up with a family that I think they had his first solid BM put in lucite and his mom still uses it as a paper weight, or it’s hanging from the rear-view mirror of her Denali. Either way, you’re just never going to feel the way about yourself that other, I’ll liken it to this, it’s like a car that rolled over a few times and no matter how much paint and bondo you put on it, that door on the passenger side, it’s always going to be a little sticky. Never going to shut. Never going to shut like a car door that never got rolled.

Right.

Adam Carolla:
You’ve been rolled. You got t-boned by a drunk driver at some point and that door is always going to be a little sticky. That ain’t a death sentence. The first way to get out of that is, you’re the only one who truly knows what’s going on inside your head.

Male Speaker:
And what make you happy.

Adam Carolla:
And what makes you effective. The point is, is the rest of the world, you show them a winner, you show them an efficient person, you show them a happy person, you show them a person that’s a good employee, show them a person that’s a good husband or a good father or a good neighbor, you show them that person, they’ll take your word for it. So, first things first, whatever chaos is going on in your head, it can stay in your head, it does not have to be projected onto the rest of the world. Source: LYBIO.net

You can climb the corporate ladder and be the CEO of Nabisco and have all the negative thoughts in your fucking head running or bouncing around like a ball inside a spray can, if you show up to work on time everyday, if you clean the gravy stains off your suit lapel, if you act as if, I always talk with Drew about this maybe you’re crazy, maybe you’re depressed, maybe feel like shit inside, act as if you’re successful. Act – there is a certain way where and eventually, you will become that person.

Meaning, okay, you have a certain amount of sadness in you, and you have a certain amount of depression, and you have a certain amount of – you fill in the negative blank, get up, and do twenty pushups every morning, and I know you feel like shit, and I know it may be twice as hard for you to do twenty pushups as a guy who feels good about himself, but I want twenty pushups. And by the way, at a certain point, tell your biceps and your shoulders, you haven’t done twenty pushups, they don’t listen. They don’t care, you do twenty pushups, your shoulders will respond the same way, a happy, well-adjusted athletic person’s body will adjust.

So get up and do it. Just get the fuck up and do it. You feel depressed? Go for a jog. You feel too depressed to go for a jog? Go another mile. Just push your ass off and start pushing yourself. And I know it sounds sort of – its a little pie in the sky, and it’s like you don’t understand depression, I understand depression, I felt – I had many years of physically-feeling like I couldn’t get out of bed. And I was never like, you don’t deserve to live and I have never like, you deserve everything in life. I was just like, life’s a bitch and then you die.

I just want to tell anyone who’s listening to this, who doesn’t feel like they deserve anything, act as if. Just start physically moving, because the depression brings you down and it physically atrophies you, and you have trouble getting out of bed. Like my mom spent the better part of her life, just unable to move. And I will tell you, that once you break through that gillnet that you feel that wet gillnet of depression that’s on top of you.

Male Speaker: Source: LYBIO.net
What is a gillnet?

Adam Carolla:
A gillnet is what dolphins get caught in, that are dragged behind Japanese trawlers and its easier pulling them up one fish at a time. That net that’s just hanging over you, well at a certain point, when you become productive and you start breaking out of that depression and you start accomplishing things in your life, it becomes addictive and just as addictive as eating the Haagen-Dazs and spending the day in your bathrobe and beating off twelve times a day and not picking up the telephone, just as additive as that may have felt at a certain time, well then writing a book and working on an independent movie and working on a podcast and an idea for an invention, and whatever it is, whatever your thing is, will become equally as addicting and you will start taking on life in the exact opposite direction that you are going now.

But the first part is, its just you have to beat yourself up, because people beat you up coming up, meaning, you need to kick your own ass, you need to go to your own – you need to create your own boot camp, which is to get our ass out of bed and start moving. Pick it up, don’t look at it, don’t think about it, for me it started always with that coffee mug that would be rattling around the passenger floor of my truck, I’d stare at it, pick it up.

Male Speaker:
I can’t possibly pick that up.

Adam Carolla:
I’ll get it tomorrow, no get it now, you know what it can stay till tomorrow, yeah but then you’ll bring another mug in there and it’s going to clank around and the handles going to break and I realized I just spent twenty minutes in there, don’t spend twenty minutes staring at the mug, go get it, and eventually you’ll just be that person that grabs the mug and brings it into the kitchen. Maybe you’re insane, maybe you’re lazy, maybe you’re depressed, but you know what the mug is in the sink.

Duncan Trussell: Source: LYBIO.net
The time I was 14 on, I was just completely immersed in martial arts, so I’m – I barely partly or barely hung out a barely socialist.

Male Speaker:
Did you feel like, because kids either feel cool or not cool, did you sort of feel not judged one way or the other, because you had something?

Duncan Trussell:
Um, I definitely never felt cool, I was always insecure, even when I was really good at something like martial arts even though that was like the first thing I was really good at, I still get super nervous if I go to talk to someone at a bank, and if I go to a bank teller I get nervous. I was getting fistfights and I wouldn’t get nervous, but talking to a bank teller I’d stumble over my words, yeah I was definitely insecure.

I think every kid is, you know in the kids the kids that aren’t idiots, if you are not – look if you don’t look at the entire possibility of life in front of you, the entirety of the possibilities, the massive amount of things that can or might happen, not having any idea whether or not you are proceeding in the right direction, not having any idea. If you don’t get paranoid, if you don’t get freaked out looking it and if you don’t like – start thinking about how smaller piece you play in this little thing and how do you figure yourself out and how do you get through this right, if you don’t feel uncomfortable, if you don’t feel insecure you are an idiot. You should feel terrified.

Male Speaker:
You can’t on any given night stop and look around and go what am I doing. You got to just keep marching forward.

Duncan Trussell:
What’s also because you are a 21 year old man at the time and when you are 21 you don’t have much time to – like you have to make a living, you are now out of the nest, okay you are on your own and how much time do you have to establish a career, how much time do you have to get things going. Well you don’t have time to sit back and kick back and relax and not make any fucking progress. Like, you gotta get going.

Male Speaker:
It’s going to take longer to make it, the guys that you say I’m going to live off this shit money, because when you are that miserable you work harder, you push yourself harder. You got to paint yourself into a corner a little bit.

Duncan Trussell:
Well you definitely have to be uncomfortable and that’s something that people don’t like to do, but in order to grow you got to get uncomfortable and there is lot of people out there that just don’t want that, they want to get as cozy as possible, as warm as possible, as quickly as possible and never get anywhere because of it.

Female Speaker: Source: LYBIO.net
Being depressed is a truly satanic state, because in general the depression has gone beyond being circumstantial, has gone beyond being a result of stimulus outside of yourself and now is just a result of some kind of reoccurring awful cascade that’s actually maybe even created changes in your neurology in a way that your shit is firing and your engines aren’t firing appropriately, so you feel tired, you can’t get anything done, anything that you want to get done doesn’t get done because you feel so tired and you feel alone and you feel like everything around you is tasteless and empty.

And I speak from a place of having been deep in that horrible pit, and I know – it’s kind of a gateway and the gate-keeper is yourself. And the gate-keeper is asking you this incredible riddle at every moment which is “why live?” And if you can answer that riddle, then the gate will swing open and you will be allowed out of this awful net and into the party that is modern life, that so many people think is a living and horrific hell.

So this is where the “Satan” word comes in really handy when you’re in this fuckin awful dungeon of depression, because here’s a really interesting thing you can do: you will find that when you’re depressed, your attention is being grabbed every second by either negative thought patterns or by external hypnotic devices for example, TV, video games, the Internet or bad people that you shouldn’t be around. And if you see these variables, if just for fun as a thought experiment, you think to yourself at this moment, I am in a hypnotic trance where I’m being distracted by Satan in the form of the various indulgences that I keep going for.

It sort of raises the stakes a little bit, because if you just think yeah you know I’m just going to fuckin sit down and play Minecraft for the next five hours, you can almost do it, it still feels like shit, you know it’s sucks, you are sitting there in this sort of decrepit state smelling your underarms and looking at this cigarette burn in the ashtray and maybe smelling your fucking cat litter box that needs to get changed, and looking at the various like cum soaked tissues and the shit scattered all around your house, you know it sucks but if you think holy fuck, I’m in the intestinal tract of Satan, and these video games, and bad people, and alcohol, and drugs and laziness are the acids that are dissolving my will and have dissolved my will to the point that I can barely move, I’m stuck like one of those mice on those horrific sadistic gummy traps that they get stuck on and I’m just in the last moments of my life underneath some dark cabinet, waiting for someone to throw me into a garbage can or drown me.

Suddenly, it might spark this thing inside of you that makes you decide to fight, cause that’s what the fucking trick is man, this is where it gets fun. Is because suddenly you realize that you’re life which up until this point might have just seemed like some kind of empty wandering through the synthetic plastic landscape that is modern life, transforms into a kind of tolkien-esque battle against the dark lord Sauron, you can name it whatever you want by the way, you don’t have to call it Satan I mean its kind of an antiquated term, you can call him Frenchy, you can call him Mr. Trips, you can call him lord darius if you want to, you get to name the fucking thing.

But it’s fun to personify the negative entropic distraction mechanisms that have arisen in your life and recognize that you’re in a sacred battle with Frenchy and if you win this battle, this wrestling match, this combat session, this fucking mortal battle against this terrific foe, which can transform into so many delightful things, then you will climb out of it a warrior, you will – you can overcome the depression, you just have to first recognize that you’re in a fight for your life, literally, you are in a fight for your fucking life, if you’re depressed literally a fight for your fucking life.

And what does it mean? What does it mean? It means that like every single aspect, every single thing surrounding you; the porn, the shitty food, the fucked up girlfriend or boyfriend, the friend that only hurts you instead of giving you positive guidance and love, the family member that – I don’t – that could have molested you when you were growing up, the person you are pretending to forgive that you haven’t really forgiven. All of these are like the heads on the writhing hydra of Mr. Frenchy, Satan call it whatever you want Queeny, recognize it for what it is.

And then when you raise the stakes and work yourself into a brave heart style warrior stance and decide that you want to live, that’s when you put up the fucking fight, and part of you that tells you “no I’m tired, lets just rest a little longer, lets just lay down for a little longer, lets just put it off till tomorrow to go to the gym, lets put off till tomorrow to go outside and run, lets put it off till tomorrow to do the pushups, lets put it off till tomorrow to tell that fuck face to get the fuck out of our lives, lets put it off till tomorrow to live.”

And if you are like me, every time that voice comes into your mind you will think how many fucking tomorrows do I have, how many tomorrows have I put off, you will find that you are surrounded by stacks of tomorrows that have become yesterdays, surrounding you like rotting fruit and you just keep staking those days on to that pile of rotting fruit as you lay there surrounded by the bloat flies, the demonic forces that whirl around you in the form of unpaid bills, belly fat and bad friends. You got to wake the fuck up and fight the fight or die, or just fucking die.

Pull on those old fucking gym shorts, put on those old stinky fucking sneakers, some gross fucking shirt, go outside and run around the fucking block, its as easy as that, that’s the first fucking battle, that’s the first fight against Mr. Frenchy, whatever you want to call Satan. And the reaction you’ll have will be an immediate sense of like lets just wait, lets put it off, lets put it off, lets put it off, lets put it off. Just, go do it, just go fucking do it right now. Take the first step in the battle that’s the most important one, and let yourself get angry these cock sucking fuck faces will try to teach you the anger is wrong, anger is good, righteous anger is a good form of anger, you need it.

This is a war for your fucking life, your head is being held underwater by the forces of entropy, only its worse than water, its some sick syrupy sap like shit, that flows out of the cock of Lucifer and you are in it like a little fucking bug in amber just floating in there, lost in an entropic world where you can’t reach your goals, because you feel tired all the fucking time.

Easy fix, jog around the fucking block, if you can’t jog around the block, do some from of physical exercise, if you can’t do a physical exercise chant a fucking mantra, if you can’t chant a fucking mantra, chant it in your head. Well you’ve got to work yourself up into a war pitch, the beginning initial movements out of the state of victim mode and into the state – into survivor mode, that wonderful place when you gaze around the battle field and stare at the desiccated corpses that once had such great power over you.