tinder lines for misc

===TINDER LINES=== (incomplete)

real quick, shouts to sneak for everything, shouts to cunfewzed for being thread motivator, shouts to that girl everyone thought was a dude for stickin around and giving girl perspective the whole time, shouts to everyone else, we're all gonna make it


Find me in efnet IRC at irc.efnet.net #tinder



OPENERS.  These are copy-pasteable and demonstrated to work.  if you've got a good one, PM me and I'll throw it on here.  The number in parenthesis signifies what I rate the cheekyness to be, so if you scared go to church and don't even fuckin bother with high numbers:


I've got a little spoon position available for hire, what would you rate your cuddling abilities at on a scale of 1-10?   (5)


Are you an archeology major?  [on reply, regardless of answer]  Well, I've got a large bone that need examining (7.5)


Could you take me in a fight?  [on positive 'yes' reply]  What makes you so confident?  [on negative 'no reply']  Well I need someone strong to help me breed the greatest fighter the world has ever seen, do you still think you're up for it?  (5)


Well, tinder says we'll make beautiful children, but I think we should grab a drink before working on the future models of America  (4)


Listen, I know this profile is fake but can I get the name of the model you used so I can look her up for later tonight?  (5)


I would swim naked through the amazon river with steak wrapped around my genitals just to share a candlelit dinner with you over skype on dial-up connection  (6)


Are you a Koala?  [regardless of answer]  Well, you've got all the koalifications (3)


I'm on a scavenger hunt and I need a dinosaur bone, the holy grail, and your phone number...Which one of those can you help me with (5)


I've had a crush on you for hours now (5)


I have 4% battery remaining. I chose to message you. Did I choose wisely? (3)


I have zero txt game. (Name), what's a good opener? (4)


Do you like to draw?  Because I put the d in raw (10)


Do you like pancakes?  [positive answers only, if she says no then she's just stupid]  Well how about iHop on that ass (9)


Our first date should be at Home Depot, what's your number so we can hammer out the details for us to nail each other (9)



CLOSERS.  Use this to pull the number.  Getting the number is the ultimate key here, since from there it already establishes trust, and you'd have to be a fuckin tard not to land a date after pulling a number:


I've only got one more question for you after I get your number...  [after her reply]  What's your number?


I wrote a poem for you.  Roses are red, violets are blue, i suck at poetry, whats your number






YOU'RE BORING AS FUCK AND THE CONVERSATION IS DEAD.  Use this to rez your convo but you only get to use one of these really, and if she doesnt respond to it then give the fuck up:


Now listen here you beautiful broad. I taped my phone to my face 2 days ago and have been sitting outside my apartment in the middle of the parking lot where the reception is strongest, just waiting for you to message me back. Why are you playing games with my heart?


Look, I imagine right now, you're feeling a bit like Alice. Tumbling down the rabbit hole. I can tell by your replies. You have the look of a woman who accepts what she sees because she's expecting to wake up. You're thinking, "a [so and so, fill this out yourself]? this is too good to be true. This cannot be real." But rest assured, I am real, I'm everywhere. Right now, you're in a prison, a prison of your mind. Unfortunately, I cannot explain to you who I am, you have to see it for yourself. This is your chance, no turning back. You don't have to give me your number, this saga ends, you wake up in the morning and believe whatever you want to believe. You give me your number, and you stay in Wonderland, and I'll show you how deep the rabbit hole goes...remember, all I am offering is the truth about me, nothing more