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Jul 15th, 2011
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  1. Sirs,
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  5. The reluctance of some Western Isles B&B owners to allow two homosexual men to share a double bed on their premises was amongst the contentious topics raised at the recent Scottish election hustings The subject was raised by the well regarded Mr Murdo Murray, former island authority dept head who now provides B&B accommodation in his family home.
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  7. Mr Murray's legitimate concerns were brushed aside by Western Isles MSP Alasdair Allan who tersely rebuked him with the words " If it's a B&B then it's none of your business what people are and you shouldn't be asking."
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  9. Imagine then a bearded dark-skinned gentleman siting at a B&B dining table putting the finishing touches to a lethal explosive device while Mr Murray innocently vacuums breakfast bread crumbs from the carpet, Mr Allan's advice still ringing in his ears. Or in the next room, a drug pusher preparing his addictive fixes as a silent Mr Murray offers a cup of herbal tea, still heeding Mr Allan's warnings.
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  11. We can see immediately that Mr Allan's unwise advice is not to be trusted by his B&B owning constituents. So might I suggest some alternative strategies ( all perfectly legal) to avoid the highly undesirable situation Mr Murray speaks of.
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  13. Before offering temporary lodgings, an appropriate carefully worded question put to the accommodation seeker would illicit the necessary information about their room partner's gender. Depending on the reply,our B&B owner could then decide on what in their opinion is the lesser of two evils -to open their family homes as a venue for sodomy, or to fob off the gay couple and decline them accommodation thereby infringing current UK laws.
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  15. That decision should be a personal matter for the B&B host. Alternatively,would any other mortal human being be so arrogant as to claim the right of dominion over our B&B owner's conscience in this matter and make that decision for them - any volunteers willing to step forward ?
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  17. But let's assume our B&B owner is targeted on their doorstep by two aggressive homosexuals well versed on their rights, demanding a double bed. What then ? This is where advance preparation in making ones home ' heterosexually friendly' can act as a deterrent, without breaking any laws.
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  19. Double room bedding,towels and toiletries could be labelled 'His and Hers,' complemented by romantic pictures of famous heterosexual couples from fact and fiction strategically positioned in hallways and bedrooms. Add appropriate music playing discreetly in the background - some songs for consideration 'When A Man Loves A Woman, ' 'Romeo And Juliet' or 'Lay Lady Lay.' Creative B&B owners could use their imaginations to further enhance the heterosexual ambiance.
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  21. In addition to minor modifications to their home decor, island B&B owners could also take more assertive action by directing disparaging remarks at the accommodation seeking couple about their relationship. Though these may seem rather unpleasant tactics, expressing a personal view critical of homosexual practise is not illegal ( yet ?) and no B&B owner can be charged with any offence or evicted from their own home for doing so.
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  23. Should our island B&B owners need a role model from the hospitality sector who's an expert practitioner of verbal unpleasantries, they could do no worse than take as their example that fine upstanding ambassador for the English tourist board, the venerable Mr Basil Fawlty (now retired)
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  25. So who could possibly object to such reasonable measures taken by Western Isles B&B owners in modestly altering their home furnishings to reflect their personal attitudes to homosexuality while verbally conveying a similar opinion ? Step forward the zealots who worship the God of political correctness.
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  27. And what a jealous God he is, demanding total allegiance from his followers, who believe their 'religion' should fully encompass equality in the world of home furnishings and musical tastes They would even wish to instruct us on the human activities we should allow in our own homes ( homosexual practice).
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  29. Never did the staunchest bible-bashing Hebridean church minister seek to foist such impositions on his parishioners homes and freedom of expression as do the PC zealots, whose fundamentalism makes our island clergy seem like laid-back dudes by comparison.
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  31. A few of my fellow islanders who look down on the church from a great height peddle the extraordinary notion that, with the exception of a few much maligned church elders, all islanders are homosexual-hugging admirers of all things gay.
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  33. In debunking that myth, I'd simply state that I'm just one amongst numerous Western Isles residents who would think it a considerably less odious prospect spending the night in the close proximity of a leaking septic tank than play host to an overnight visit from a sexually active gay couple.
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  35. Iain M Macdonald
  36.  
  37. Miavaig
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