Celestia Hates Fags

>Ah, nothing better than starting the day with some pancakes.
>You leave Sugarcube Corner and look around, but are suddenly tackled by a cerulean coloured Pegasus.
"Hi Dash, what are we playing?" you say, laying on the floor, with Dash on top of your chest.
>"HIDE ME ANON!" she pleas, frantically.
>Something tells you this wasn't a game she was playing. Probably the fear in her magenta eyes.
"Why?" you ask her.
>Dash looks around nervously, and her suddenly go wide.
>"They're after me!" she says with a quivering voice, pointing to the other side of the road.
>There, Applejack stands, with a sign in her hoof.
>"Celestia Hates Fags", it reads.
>Holy fuck what a cunt.
>You grab Rainbow Dash and get up to your feet.
"This shit is unacceptable. Come with me, we'll talk to her."
>Dash struggles against your grip.
>"N-No Anon, you don't understand-"
"Oh I understand alright. I can't believe this shit."
>Dash tries to hold herself onto the ground and any object you pass as you walk towards Applejack, but without success.
>Applejack noticed the two of you, and turns towards you.
>"Oh heya Anon, and hi... Rainbow Dash."
>She squints her eyes together while saying the last two words.
>You breath in harshly and plop Dash down next to you.
>Rainbow Dash tries to run away, but you hold her by her tail.
"Care to explain what the fuck this is about."
>"Ah'm not sure what you mean, Anon, I am just proclaiming the word of Celestia."
"What the fuck, she's your friend!"
>"That's why Ah care for her, Anon! Ah care for her well-being and-"
"Wow. Just wow. Being a homosexual isn't an illness, you know. You fucking disgust me."
>Dash and Applejack both look at you with a puzzled expression.
>"Ah wutnow?" Applejack asks.
"You discriminate Rainbow Dash because of her sexual preference, but honestly I don't see how what she rubs her genitals against should concern you in any way."
>Dash clears her throat.
>"A-Anon, I'm not a lesb-"
"No Dash, stop lying to yourself just so you fit into this sick society of open bigotry."
>Applejack puts a hoof to your chest.
>"Uh, Anon, just hold on fer a minute, I think there may be a misunderstanding here"
>You raise an eyebrow.
"Uh-huh, about what?"
>She points a hoof to her sign.
>"This means 'fag' as in... cigarettes. It's an anti-smoking campaign."
>Your jaw hits the fucking floor.
"Wait, and why does-"
>"How the fuck do you think I got this voice in the first place?" Dash stops you.