Dinner Crasher

>Be eating dinner, not thinking about fluffy ponies.
>Suddenly see fluffy pony in your yard.
>Sees you through sliding glass door.
>Fluffy pony presses against glass, staring at you miserably.
>"New fwend? Fwuffy hungwy! Give foodies?"
>Ugh. What to do.
>Ignore it? When has that ever worked?
>"Hewo? New fwiend? Fwuffy hungwy! Tummy is ouchies. Pwease, nummies? Fwuffy wan' nummies!"
>Oh god...
>Just keep eating. Don't look at it.
>Fluffy pony clambers hooves onto glass.
>Scratches and bangs.
>"Hewp fwuffy! Pwease? Fwuffy hungwy! Fwuffy--"
>The glass door shatters.
>"Lowd noise scawry!"
>"WHAT THE FUCK?!"
>Storm up from table.
>Fluffy pony's already cutting hooves stumbling over glass.
>"Owie! Hewp! Fwuffy hoovies huwt! Owie!"
>Snatch up fluffy pony. Bits of glass in her hooves.
>"New fwiend? Hewp fwuffy, hoovies have boo-boos."
>Carry her to basement.
>"New home? Daddy, fwuffy hungwy!"
>"I AM NOT YOUR DADDY, AND YOU DO NOT LIVE HERE!"
>Throw her in old dog cage.
>"You're going to the pound tomorrow, you little rodent."
>"No wodent! Good fwuffy! Pwease, tummy huwt! Hoovies huwt!"
>Shut door behind you, leave her in dark basement overnight.
>Goddamn fluffy ponies.