Vertex - Chapter XIII, A Friend in Need

		Chapter XIII, A Friend in Need

By the time Andrea had managed to stop sobbing, the lunch break was nearing its end. That was messed up. He hadn’t been the crying type before. Then again he’d actually been a he before. That was even more messed up. And then Craig just walked out with that Elf right when he was supposed to be listening! Talk about MESSED UP! And he was a mess! And… and… what the Hell! If he could come to school when he had issues, like, serious issues, the kind that most people would try to kill themselves for, why couldn’t those nymphos hold their horses? Eh? Eeeh.
Better go eat. Eating makes you less sad. And better wash up too, no need to let anyone see he’d been crying. Yeah.
What was with those two anyway? So they’d kissed the other day, so what? That wasn’t a big deal. Kissing wasn’t the kind of thing you skipped out of school for, was it? Of course not. Then what? They were going to fuck like rabbits all day and all evening, what else!
The idea was sickening. They’d probably all kinds of messed up shit, too, since Craig was into all that stuff with muzzles and pantyhose, and she was a Dark Elf so she’d be totally into it too, and then there’d be clothespins and candles and she’d ram a banana up his ass or something and he’d jizz all over those sexy boots she has and… oooh.
Andrea filled a basin with water as cold as was available, then fell headfirst into it.
‘Grrrglgblrrhgh’ shouted the impotent rage as it exploded from within.
‘Bwaaah!’ gasped Andrea, pulling out from the water. That had been helpful, right? Ahahaha. No.

Heading to the cafeteria, Andrea was greeted with the familiar bustling and clinking of cafeterias. And the smell of fish. Fish wasn’t good news. Fish dishes were usually gross and had white goo in them that made him think of things that he shouldn’t have thought of. At least there was salad and bread to fall back on. And milk. Delicious milk.
Looking around for an inconspicuous spot to sit at, Andrea spied out Lance talking to someone with a lot of laughter and flailing arms. Butterflies went ballistic in her stomach when she saw him. His stomach. When he saw him. Right.
Lance was talking to a girl. A Lizardwoman. Andrea’s heart sank. Was everyone suddenly in heat and trying to fuck the first slut that came their way, what?
A look of recognition and a bright smile appeared on Lance’s face and he gestured for Andrea to join them. There was no saying no to that face. Lance was all irresistible and stuff.

Andrea brought her tray down on the table next to the Lizardwoman. She’d seen her around before, with her tight muscles and those sweats that were both loose enough to move in but tight enough to show off her form at the same time, and that ponytail and, and those eyes that had two sets of lids that blinked in that creepy reptile way that some guys thought was cute and that was actually a pretty nice ribbon she had, bright blue and tied in just the most adorable little bow!
‘H-hi’ Andrea managed, greeting Lance, who brushed a hand through his hair absentmindedly, then scratched his head as if it had been his intention to do that in the first place.
‘You’re kinda running late. You and Craig get held up or something?’ he asked.
‘O-oh, no, I, uhh, he left’ Andrea mumbled, wanting very much to avoid this subject. Which was weird, wasn’t it his job to let everyone know where Craig had gone?
Hell no. It was his job to lie about it to the teachers. But to Lance? No way. She wouldn’t lie to Lance. As soon as he asked, she’d let him know that…
‘Okay, cool. Hey, you know BB?’ Lance asked, and Andrea was thrown off balance once again. Turning to the Lizardwoman she put up as convincing a smile as she could manage and noticed she was staring somewhere around her ears. Ears? O-oh. Oh no.
‘Enchante’ he managed, brushing his hair so as to cover the ear the Lizard could see. She blinked that second set of lids, obviously noticing something suspicious. She had freckles like a Troll, too. Why was he noticing this?
‘Any friend of Lance is a friend of mine’ she said with an air of very definite chuuni. Or maybe she was just from one of those families. The ones were the mother was a chuuni and the daughter grew up thinking it was normal. Or maybe she was from one of those other families where they really were old knights. Those were the worst. Not that saying “enchante” to a girl you just met was any better. But Andrea was beyond any of that now. Those reptilian eyes were still fixed to where his ear had been poking out from under his hair. She KNEW. Something. Suspected. Bad.
‘However!’ she said as if she’d just had a dramatic pause for emphasis, making the lost-in-thought Andrea flinch a little.
‘I disapprove of being called BB’ she said, rolling her eyes.
‘I’ll just call you Vivian then’ Lance conceded.
‘Vivi is fine’ the Lizard corrected him.
‘Bee-Bee it is!’
‘Hmph’
There was definitely something going on between these two. Andrea felt a twinge of disgust again. Just drop your pants and fuck right there on the table!
‘So Andy, you doing anything tonight?’ Lance asked, making Andrea start again. She really needed to stop getting lost in thought when there was company present.
‘W-what?’
‘Tonight. Was thinking we could go play laser-tag, yeah? I thought it’d be me, you, Craig and someone else, and I thought, hey, BB’s…’
‘Stop it’
‘Right, Vivi’s cool, and I thought hey, why not? So I asked her. She’s up for it. So that’d make four, and that’s good enough, right?’
Andrea tried not to frown too much. First of all the idea of playing laser-tag when she had to worry about not being a man or even a bloody human anymore was just plain dumb, and then there was the very real fact that Craig couldn’t be joining them because he was probably getting tied up and having beads stuffed up his ass and his balls crushed and, and…
‘I’m sorry, but I don’t think Craig’s gonna make it today’ she said.
‘Aww, really?’ Lance was downright disappointed. Andrea wanted to ruffle his hair. Seemed like the kind of thing that’d comfort him.
‘Maybe we can just go by ourselves? Three is still better than none at all’ Vivi pointed out.
‘Well, I mean, I don’t know…’ Andrea squirmed.
‘What’s that? You’re scared I’ll whoop yo ass? Hah! I’ll let you two ladies double-team me if that’s what it takes!’ Lance boasted, and the unintended euphemism wasn’t lost on Andrea. Or on Vivi, who apparently was just as capable of blushing as mammals. Though with those mammaries she WAS a mammal.
‘…or we could ask another person to join us’ Vivi suggested.
Both Lance and Andrea stared at her, struck dumb by this stroke of genius.
‘I actually DID think of that’ Lance said, scratching his head again. Andrea couldn’t help but wonder if it would be okay to touch his hair. Just a little.
‘But the thing is, at this short of a notice, there really isn’t anyone I know who we could just drag in there, you know? I mean even B…’ he was interrupted by intense blinking of a second set of eyelids, ‘I mean, uhh, Vivi here was pretty much a wild card, you know? Like, I tried my luck and it worked out, but are we just going to start asking random people? Not likely’
They all went quiet for a bit and Andrea tried to get some of her chow down.
‘Then again, maybe a threeway isn’t so bad?’ Lance said, and Andrea almost choked on her milk.
‘And what’s so important Craig can’t hang out with his buddies, anyway? He break a leg or something? I mean if he left in the middle of a schoolday and all?’

And here I thought you’d never ask and I wouldn’t have to say anything, lamented Andrea, who didn’t want to answer at all.
‘He, uhh…’
‘Hey, you guys know that Greg-dude?’ said a female voice all of a sudden, interrupting her. Thank you, whoever you are!
The three sitting at the table turned to face the new speaker, who was… damn tall. And green. And had fangs and horns. Andrea had seen the Ogre before. She was in Farai’s circle, actually.
‘Why hello there!’ said Lance with a wave and a grin. Seriously dude?
‘Wasn’t talking to you’ the Ogre said, a look of obvious disdain on her face. There was a faint odour of cigarette smoke about her. A real delinquent, this one.
‘Baby, if I was gonna mess around with the alphabet, I’d put B next to…’
‘Lance, please pipe down. Let her speak’ Vivi interrupted.
Lance shrugged but shut up. The Ogre gave one last mean look to him and then turned her surprisingly gentle brown eyes at Andrea again.
‘So you know Greg? He’s in your class?’
‘H-his name isn’t Greg, it’s Craig, but I think we’re talking about the same person, yeah…’
‘So you can tell me what happened, right? Fanny skipped school with him, right?’ the Ogre inquired in a rush, some concern in her voice.
‘Um, yes?’ Andrea answered, without a hint of nervousness. It seemed quite natural to talk about now that he was talking to this girl. This big, strong, apparently quite nice girl.
‘So they say anything? They’re not gonna do anything dumb, are they?’
And now it was awkward again. This was really none of his business, he didn’t need to keep tabs on all that stuff, seriously, what was he, Craig’s mom?
‘Of course they’re going to do something dumb, they’re bloody idiots!’ he snapped, surprising everyone present.
And then the Ogre laughed.
‘Can’t argue with that, squirt. Elf’s in a rut and the guy’s a guy, and you’re all the same, ain’t ya?’ she said, fixing another gaze at Lance, who threw up his arms defensively, ready to try and salvage the situation.
‘Now I’ll have you know I’m quite the gentleman…’
‘You’re a virgin slut is what you are’ she said, snarling.
‘Excuse me, but who are you?’ asked the Lizard.
The Ogre seemed to only now notice her.
‘Name’s Mara’
‘Vivienne. Notice that Lance? Try to remember it next time. Everyone calls me Vivi. Except Lance, who’s dumb’ she introduced herself.
‘Mmhm. He sure is. And the squirt?’
‘Oh, I’m, uhh, Andrea’
‘Right. So what DO you know about Greg and Fanny?’ the Ogre persisted, sitting down next to Lance and across from Andrea.

What followed was a very brief recap of Farai busting in on the boy’s locker-room (SLUT!) and how she’d grabbed Craig who’d left his friends without a fourth member in their little laser-tag outing (JERK!) resulting in Lance deciding it was a good idea to ask Mara to come join them instead.
And then she said yes.
‘W-wait, what? Really?’ Lance was downright shocked.
‘Sure. Love me some laser-tag. We doing teams or free-for-all?’
There was a general huddling as they discussed this question.
‘I mean, free-for-all is more, you know, mobile, you’re always on the prowl, never know where the enemies are, you’ve got no back-up, it’s just plain badass!’ Lance expressed his view.
‘But it’s more challenging to work as a team!’ Andrea protested.
‘You’re just saying that because you’re scared you’ll come in dead-last’
‘Am not!’
‘I think partnering up is a perfectly legitimate idea that makes new tactics available’ said Vivi.
‘Oh, you’re scared too, are you?’
‘Lance get over yourself, you’re not that good’
‘Oh I see, you’re ganging up on me already!’
‘Want to avoid that? Do teams’

Mara the Ogre regarded this exchange with amusement. She’d only come here looking to make sure of something, anything, regarding her best friend being a dumbass, and she felt much more at peace now. This G… this Craig couldn’t be too bad a guy if these were his closest friends. He was probably just right for Fanny to park her fanny on his face. And since she didn’t need to worry about it anymore, she might as well have fun tonight.
Then a conclusion was reached.
‘By democratic means it has been decided we’ll do teams’ Lance announced.
‘Really? I didn’t get a vote’ Mara protested.
‘Aha! See, I’ve still a chance at getting my way!’ he said triumphantly.
‘Dude, what? Best you can do is getting a tie’ Andrea pointed out indignantly.
‘Yeah, but when it becomes clear that we’re at an impasse, I’m sure your weak will is going to break and you’ll come over to my side!’
‘Actually I’m on their side’ Mara said.
‘Hear that, she’s on your si… oh come on!’
She patted him on the back.
‘Don’t worry. I promise not to whoop yo ass too badly’ she comforted him.
‘You decided that we’re on opposite teams, did you?’
‘Sure did. We’ll do either girls on guys or mixed teams, but I’m not working with you, and that there’s a fact’ she said, scratching the base of her horns. Seeing that Andrea felt a tiny little twinge in his skull, but she suppressed it.
‘I’m opposed to girls vs boys’ Vivi said.
‘Whaaat~, too sexist for you?’ Mara teased her. Or tried to. Vivi’s response wasn’t at all what she’d expected.
‘If it’s the two of us against the two of them, it’ll be downright unfair, won’t it? They wouldn’t stand a chance’ she said, letting out a little giggle.
Mara laughed too.
‘Ain’t that the truth! So it’ll be me and Andy there against Vivi and the mongrel!’
‘Mongrel? Now wait just a minute…’
‘You ain’t nothing but a hound dog~’ Mara sang at him, and it was around then they noticed how late it was and that they probably should have been in class right about now.


			***

It had taken some effort for all four of them to gather up after school, considering they were from three different classes, but Andrea and Lance had each other’s numbers and when the three of them were together, Mara was able to spot them and then they just found the right bus and headed off. There weren’t enough empty seats for any of them to sit next to each other, which was actually just fine by Andrea, who was starting to feel more and more like just getting away from crowds and groups and going home. It had been plenty awkward to give excuses for Craig’s absence, but that had passed. The real problem was when he’d had to go to the bathroom and had been reminded of the fact that he wasn’t, in fact, a he anymore, and then she’d taken the chance of being seen and checked those damn ears in the mirror.
It’d been like looking at a tomboy Elf. Short hair, pointy ears, big, pretty eyes… oh god she was even thinking of her own eyes as pretty now and they weren’t even any different from what they’d been before the change! FUCK THAT!

Thinking about it now, maybe this wasn’t such a bad idea after all. What is the most fun a guy can have with his pants on?
War, right? There’s two guns a guy can shoot , right, and there’s like, a biological imperative for both, right? And lasers are way cooler than ballistic weapons, not that GIRLS would understand either. Laser-tag is the manliest thing, in retrospect. He’d totally embrace it and his masculine side today!
A single solitary tear ran down her face and she wiped it away as if he had an itch. That kind of thinking wasn’t fooling anyone, least of all herself.

They got out of the bus and into the complex of supermarkets and parking halls and other things in such complexes, making their way into the laser-tag… place? Picking up the smallest arena (to save up on money), a relatively short game (an hour, to save up money) and two-vs-two team death match (to uphold the democratic process), they prepared to forget all their troubles.
‘Got my back, do you?’ asked Mara while they were dressing up in their harnesses.
‘Sure…’
‘Buck up, you hear? I’m not losing to that peacock’
‘C-cock?’