Healing Kisses (ch30)

EARLY RELEASE FOR ALL MY PATRONS!!

The next reward for nadie95! A really sweet concept (and as usual I went about 2k words overboard oops lol)

Disclaimer: I do not own Shoujo Kageki Revue Starlight.

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							Chapter 30. Letter To You

It started out as a very normal day at Seishou, which ended up bringing to light a very nostalgic and fateful memory for Claudine.

Their dance instructor had asked the girls to share techniques to help combat pre-performance jitters, or otherwise things they did before going onstage that helped them calm down or focus on the performance ahead.

"Oh, oh!" Karen blurts out immediately. "That's easy! I have Hikari-chan's hair pin!" She turns her head to reveal the golden crown clip with gusto, as if everyone hasn't already seen it a million times before. "And Mahiru-chan will always make us something yummy to calm our nerves! With those things to help me out, I almost never feel nervous anymore!"

"Same for me," Hikari says. "I have Karen's hair pin. And Mahiru got me a Mr. White keychain. I like to hold one in each hand and wish that the performance will go well. It calms me down."

Mahiru is blushing slightly by this point.

"I'm so glad I could be of help, you two! You both help me a lot, as well! Hikari-chan gave me a Suzudaru Cat keychain in return, and Karen-chan gave me a photo of everyone from last year. I love looking at those before a performance."

"Oh!" Nana chimes in. "It's the same for me! I like looking at everyone's photographs!"

"I agree," Junna says. "We have a lot of photos in our room thanks to Nana. Looking them over always motivates me to put on a good performance so we can take more photos and add them to the collection."

"Really?" Kaoruko hums. "I usually have Futaba-han give me a massage to calm my nerves~"

"Sure do," Futaba sighs. "As for me, I just like doin' a bit of exercise to pump myself up a bit."

Maya has been listening patiently all the while, easily able to envision all of her friends doing exactly as they describe. When it's finally her turn, she is content to add to the conversation.

"I have always found it relaxing and beneficial to partake in certain vocal warm-ups," she says. "As well as reciting my lines. While some may find this to induce anxiety before a performance, I find it to be rather reassuring."

Everyone nods; especially since it was Maya who had given such an answer, no one is all that surprised.

At last it is Claudine's turn, and Maya turns curiously to her partner. She hadn't ever known of any pre-performance rituals or superstitions Claudine engaged in, if any, in spite of how much time they spend together both in public and behind closed doors, so she is rather curious.

Claudine has been quiet this whole time, and now that it is her turn to share, she takes another moment of pause and seems to choose her words carefully. Maya has to admit she's become rather eager to know by the time her partner gives an answer.

"There's something I like to read."

Their fellow classmates smile and nod in understanding, but Claudine gives no more information than that before the bell rings and their instructor dismisses them.

Claudine and the rest start heading toward the locker room, but Maya lingers for a moment. She can't fathom what it is Claudine was referring to. She's been to and slept in Claudine's room perhaps more times than her own, but Maya can't recall ever seeing Claudine reading one particular book more than any others.

"Perhaps it is a script?" she wonders. "The Starlight from our first-year Starlight Festival?"

"Hey, Tendo Maya!"

Maya snaps out of her reverie at the sound of her better half's chiding call.

"Are you just going to stand around all day? We have things to do!"

Maya casts her a smile.

"Of course, Saijou-san."

Maya goes to her, as she always does, but she won't soon be able to forget the question that's taken residence in the back of her mind.

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That evening, Maya requests that they spend the night in Claudine's room, which Claudine has no qualms about.

But as they curl up in bed together and engage in the usual cuddles and kisses, Maya finds her eyes wandering around the room in search of something; a script left on the desk, a book pulled just slightly more from its shelf than any other.

Claudine understands rather quickly that Maya's attention is divided, so she pauses in the kisses she'd been trailing along her neck in favor of pulling back to glare.

"Hey, Tendo Maya." Her voice is softer than it had been earlier, but still stern. Maya blinks and refocuses her attention.

"Yes?"

Claudine narrows her eyes.

"You're distracted. Did something happen?"

Maya reprimands herself for such foolishness; to have taken her full attention from Claudine for even a second is certainly a crime.

"My apologies." Maya cups the side of her face and relents in earnest. "It is true there has been something on my mind."

Claudine immediately becomes wary.

"What is it? Is something wrong?"

Maya shakes her head, chuckling softly. She's very flattered Claudine would get so animated and defensive of her.

"Nothing is wrong," she promises her with a soft kiss. "It is simply something I am curious about."

Claudine takes a moment to relax now in knowing it's nothing bad. She exhales, wrapping her arms back around Maya's shoulders.

"Well then? Spit it out. You can tell me what's on your mind."

Maya hugs her close, somehow feeling like she hasn't done it in weeks, when in fact she's been doing it every night for months now.

"What is it you read?" she wonders. "Before a performance? You never did elaborate in class."

Claudine grows still for a moment. Maya counts her heartbeats, which feel a little quicker than usual all of a sudden. When Claudine finally decides on her words, she buries her face in Maya's shoulder as she answers.

"That's none of your business."

It's her usual good-natured feistiness, the kind that would always make Maya chuckle. But this time, it makes her deflate instead, less at Claudine's refusal to answer, and more so at her own insensitivity for pressing the matter when Claudine clearly had not wanted to give more information on it earlier in class.

"Very well. I apologize for prying."

"Enough of that." Claudine eases back and kisses her forehead, letting her know she isn't upset. "Let's get some sleep."

Maya nods her agreement, then slowly rolls Claudine onto her back so she may lay on top of her, hugging her down into the mattress. Claudine hugs her shoulders, locking Maya in place to share her warmth.

But even long after Claudine has dozed off, Maya lies awake wondering what could possibly be the answer to her query. She is feeling just a little disheartened to know that there is something Claudine isn't willing to share with her, but she also realizes that is a terribly selfish way of thinking.

/She is entitled to her secrets just as much as anyone./

But Maya would be lying to say that doesn't make her all the more curious.

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For the next several days, Maya can't help but continue to wonder about this mystery item Claudine always reads before going onstage. They have no performances coming up within the week, so Maya has no foreseeable chance of stumbling upon her during her ritual.

She truly is torn; Claudine had made it very clear that there was no good reason for Maya to have to know her secret, and Maya knows she should respect Claudine's wishes above all else. It isn't that she wants to pry or unearth something major; she's very simply curious. More so than she's ever been about anything else before.

What could be so significant for someone as talented and motivated as Claudine to feel the need to re-read before every single performance?

Maya knows that in time she'll just forget about this and Claudine will be able to keep her secrets in peace.

So Maya makes a conscious effort not to think about the topic, and tries not to let her mind wander when they are in class, practicing, or laying down for bed together. All she needs is Claudine, here and now, and nothing else truly matters.

And it's just a week or so later, when Maya has fully put her heart into this truth, when she ends up accidentally coming across something in Claudine's room.

She and Claudine had slept in about an hour or so, since it is Saturday morning. After a good while of lazy half-conscious kisses and cuddles, Claudine gently detaches herself from Maya to shower, leaving her in bed with one more kiss before she goes.

Maya watches her back until Claudine exits the room to head to the communal baths, and already finds herself pining for her swift return. But until then, Maya can live with curling into Claudine's mattress and breathing in her scent on the blankets and the pillow, nestling into the lingering remnants of her warmth.

Maya sighs and closes her eyes for a few more minutes before finally sitting up. She gets up and makes the bed as neatly as possible, humming a bit to warm up her voice. She notices Claudine's closet door is slightly ajar due to one of her robes being caught in the door, so Maya takes the liberty upon herself to go fix it.

But when she opens the door, things inside the closet shift around a bit, which causes a few items on the shelf above the clothes hangers to rustle. A jewelry box, decorated with intricate patterns, French words, and depictions of the Eiffel Tower begins to slip, and Maya lunges forward to catch it. And although she manages to secure the box itself, a thin pink envelope ends up fluttering to the carpet.

Maya carefully places the box on the nearby dresser, then crouches down to pick up the envelope, only to discover that the paper inside has fallen halfway out. Her eyes can't help but read over the first few words she finds on it.

"Dear Saijou Claudine-san"

Maya forces herself to look away. It would be highly unsightly of her to be going through Claudine's personal belongings like this, even if it was on accident. Her best course of action would be to slip the letter back into its envelope, place the envelope back into the box, and replace the box on its shelf without another glance.

However, there is something about the style of the childish handwriting, something about the parchment the letter is written on…

Something compels her to read on almost against her will.

"Dear Saijou Claudine-san,

I have just recently come to see your performance in 'Arrie,' which was so wonderful I cannot possibly put it into words. I have been a devoted fan of yours since the very beginning, but today I finally felt the courage to write you this letter and send it. Your talent, grace, and charisma are second-to-none in all that you do, and I aspire to be as influential and devoted to the stage as you are some day. I very much look forward to continuing being your fan.

Yours truly"

There is no signature at the base of the letter.

Maya is quiet for a long moment as her eyes scan the words once again. Something stirs in her chest, but she can't be entirely certain what it is. The style and pattern of the writing is feminine, but there's something else about it as well...

She does something heinous then. She tucks the cherished letter under her arm and puts the envelope back into its box empty.

After swiftly putting the box back on its shelf, she makes for the door with the letter under her arm. But just as she gets there, the door opens inward at her.

"Kyaa!" Claudine is startled to see her right there. "You scared me!"


"My apologies-" Maya hastily holds the letter behind her back, out of view. Claudine tilts her head.

"Leaving so soon?"


"Yes…" Maya says calmly. "I simply need to fetch my clothes for the day. I will rejoin you momentarily."

"At least you made the bed. All right then, I'll see you for breakfast." Claudine steps aside, expecting a small parting kiss or hug.

But Maya is thinking about something else, to the point where she nearly neglects her partner altogether until Claudine gives a huff. She grabs Maya's free hand and tugs her in.

"We've got practicing to do today, you know."


Maya draws in a deep breath and smiles.


"Of course. I look forward to having a productive session with you." Now she remembers to leave Claudine with a kiss and a quick one-armed hug around her waist, strategically moving sideways around her as she exits the room to keep her back out of view.

Once she lets her go, Maya hurries across the hall to her own room as Claudine retreats into hers. Maya closes the door behind herself and goes to her desk, where she carefully places the letter, which she had made very certain not to crumple even the slightest bit.

Of course she fully intends to give the letter back to its rightful owner before it can be missed, but first she wants to write one of her own. As Seishou's top student Tendo Maya, she feels it is only right that she write a letter to match that of this younger fan of Claudine's, to let her partner know just how much she inspires her, even now.

So Maya takes a seat at her desk and opens the drawer to pull out her nicest parchment paper, which is light blue with swan designs around the bottom and swirls all around the edges. She finds her finest ball-point pen and begins to ponder the very best and most honest things she could possibly put into words before she begins to write.

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Claudine can't help but think Maya had been acting a little strangely before she'd hurried out of the room that morning. She has every right to be concerned that Maya's parents had done or said something to upset her, so Claudine plans to give her a bit of space for now, but she's fully intent on going to see her soon if Maya doesn't come to her first.

But for the moment, Claudine notes her closet door is slightly ajar, so she goes to it and peers inside. Some of the clothes are a bit out-of-order, and the things she has stored on the shelf are beginning to clutter.

So she takes the time to rearrange everything according to its size and color, humming to herself all the while.

When she picks up her jewelry box, Claudine feels a small rush of warmth swirl through her chest. Even though she typically only opens her precious envelope before a performance, or when she is feeling nervous or upset, she can't resist the urge to give her special letter a read this morning. Whenever it's within her reach, Claudine feels compelled to read it, to appreciate the feelings of that unknown little girl who had admired Claudine so many years ago, when she had only been a child and an amateur at best herself.

Cradling the box against her chest, Claudine opens it carefully and smiles at the pink envelope inside. She reaches in to touch it and lift it out.

But even just from doing that much, her smile falls.

The envelope feels lighter. She's picked it up and held it more than enough times to have memorized exactly how heavy it should be, and the weight just isn't there.

With the first pangs of panic already shooting through her chest, Claudine feels her throat tighten as she puts down the box and opens the envelope.

It's empty.

A sickening dread grips her, that kind of dread you can only feel when you realize you've misplaced your most prized possession.

She nearly sways as she drops the envelope back into its box and whirls around to face her closet. She scans the bedroom floor, but can't see the pink paper anywhere. Even rushing to her closet and pushing all her clothes aside leaves her empty-handed.

Frantically, she rummages through all the items she'd just organized, feeling nauseous with helplessness, almost to the point of tears.

"It's gone… No… It can't be…"

She's so frazzled she just isn't thinking clearly about where it could be. That must be it. She just needs someone level-headed to help her right now.

So Claudine dashes out her door to Maya's with a desperate plea.

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Maya has just finished writing her letter to Claudine with the neatest calligraphy she could possibly muster. She'd made sure to pour all of her most tender, heartfelt feelings into it, mimicking the format of the original letter written by the young child.

She's been smiling bemusedly to herself all the while, wondering what kind of expression Claudine might make upon finding this new letter along with her old one once Maya put it back in secrecy, how Claudine might be pleasantly puzzled, but still delighted…

Certainly not anything like how she is when she bursts through Maya's door a second later.

Maya jumps nearly out of her seat when her door is thrust open and a frazzled Claudine pushes through. Her clothes are ruffled, her face is pale, and her eyes are wide in distress. Maya even believes she might see tears coming on.

She realizes all at once that this secret little act she had tried to pull has gone terribly wrong.

She covers the contents of her desk on instinct, but before she can get a single word out, Claudine is rushing to her in a fluster.

"Please-" Her voice is choked with panic, and her grip as she grabs Maya's arm is shaking. "I need your help-"

Claudine's thoughts must be so scattered she doesn't even notice the familiar paper partially concealed right there on Maya's desk. She is so focused on her mission to find the letter which she assumes can only be in her own room that she doesn't think to recognize it elsewhere.

Maya already knows her harmless little scheme has gone completely awry, and the guilt that churns in her stomach is second only to her urge to put and end to Claudine's troubles as quickly and as tactfully as possible.

"Claudine-" Maya feels awful in knowing it's her own fault Claudine is like this right now. She almost comes clean right away just to spare her the worry. Maya reaches out to cup her cheek and needs to resist the urge to kiss her in apology. She keeps her cool as best she can and speaks gently. "Whatever is the matter?"

"It's gone-" Claudine chokes. "I can't find it-"

Maya flinches; this is confirmation that it really is about the letter. But she still believes she can right this wrong, so she does not confess to her crime just yet.

"Please, take a breath." She knows it's horribly unfair of her to ask Claudine to calm down when Maya knows full-well what is ailing her, but she wants to keep up the act in hopes to amend this. "If you've lost something, then I shall help you look for it."

Claudine draws in a few deep breaths as Maya suggested, but Maya can see the tears welling up in her eyes. Her heart shatters.

"Oh, Claudine…" Maya pulls her into a tight embrace, trying to channel all of her assurances into the contact. Claudine hiccups a few times against her shoulder as Maya pets down her back. "Whatever it is, we shall find it in no time. I can promise you this, Claudine."

Claudine has to admit she feels just a little better being in Maya's arms and hearing those words from her. She sniffles, drawing in a few more deep breaths as she clings to her back.

After a moment of finding comfort in Maya's arms, Claudine eases back.

"It must be in my room. It has to be…"

Maya leans in to rest her forehead against Claudine's, cupping the back of her neck.

"We will find it," she assures her again. At the same time, Maya subtly takes both papers from her desk with her other hand and conceals them behind her back once more.

Claudine exhales again before grabbing her free hand to lead her out the door. Maya follows Claudine back into her room, which she can tell has been made a bit messy due to Claudine's searching. But she still has to act as though she doesn't know what this is about.

"Now then," she says. "What should I be searching for?"

Claudine hesitates, but decides finding her missing treasure is worth revealing what it is.

"A letter," she mumbles. "It was a letter. On pink paper-"

"Very well." Maya wraps an arm around her shoulders and pulls her into another brief hug before she can get too worked up. "Let us look, then. Where did you last see your letter?"

"The closet," Claudine replies.

"Then please allow me to have a look. Perhaps you can search the dresser?" She certainly doesn't want to drag this out any longer than she needs to with Claudine clearly so upset about it, but she doesn't want to get caught either.

Though, in retrospect, Maya really hadn't thought this through too well, considering she'd written a second letter which Claudine would clearly know was hers as soon as she read it.

But for now Claudine agrees to go search her dresser, and Maya hurries to the closet. She moves a few things around under the guise of searching for a lost item, waiting a moment or so just so she won't seem too suspicious in finding the letter quickly. She can hear Claudine mumbling to herself across the room, and just the distressed tone of her voice has Maya eager to end this little fiasco she'd created.

She carefully folds her brand new letter into the folds of the old one before straightening up and turning to her partner.

"Ah. Could this be it…?"

Claudine snaps her head up and whirls around, and her face crumples with relief at the sight of the pink paper.

"That's it!" She hurries over, taking the letter from Maya with shaking hands and holding it close to her chest. She sighs in deep relief as Maya pats her head.

"I am very much relieved. Are you all right?"

"Oui…" Claudine lets out another sigh. "It's just… this letter is very precious to me. Thank you, Tendo Maya."

Maya smiles, though she still feels guilty for having caused all this chaos.


"You are most welcome. Please allow me to help you tidy things up a little."

So as Claudine puts her folded letter back into its pink envelope, Maya helps clean up a bit.

When they've finished she can't help but hug and kiss Claudine for a moment, half in apology and half in sheer affection.

They go about the rest of their day from there, practicing and eating and enjoying time with their friends as usual. And come evening, Maya takes Claudine back to her room for the night.

Yet Claudine feels she wants to read her special letter once more after having misplaced it that morning, so she retreats to her room briefly before bed give it another read.

And perhaps due to her relief in finding the letter earlier, she hadn't noticed the difference in weight.

But as she extracts it from its box now, she realizes it's a bit heavier than usual. Puzzled, she opens up the old pink letter-

-only to find a brand new sheet of blue paper inside along with it.

Baffled, she places the pink paper aside to reread the words. She'd memorized it by heart long ago, and still feels the same warmth as always.

And then she reads over the curious blue letter, which is written in a very familiar fashion…

"Dear Saijou Claudine-san,

I would simply like to offer my sincerest gratitude to you. You see, you have greatly inspired not only myself, but countless others with your exceptional skill, unbridled passion, and infallible love for the stage. Years ago, I only could have dreamed of seeing you perform onstage, let alone ending up as your classmate.

You truly are the most dazzling and beautiful person in my world, and I sincerely hope to continue experiencing many new things together with you onstage. And I still aspire to be as influential and devoted to the stage as you are. I very much look forward to it.

Yours truly,

Tendo Maya."

Claudine's jaw drops.

Of course Maya had written this blue letter.

Of course Claudine recognizes this handwriting and speech pattern.

But not from school work and notes and scripts she's shared with Maya within the past two years at Seishou.

No. Claudine recognizes them from something written a decade earlier, something she's been reading for her entire life.

She doesn't know if she wants to kiss her or kill her more.

Claudine folds both letters up now and puts them in the envelope together before putting the box back in its place.

Then, she draws in a deep breath before storming across the hall where her partner is already preparing for her punishment.

"Tendo Maya!"

Maya spends the better part of that night explaining herself and apologizing for worrying her, then makes it up to her time and again in warm kisses and the most flattering of words.

Claudine lets her continue until she's satisfied and until she's annoyed from hearing her talk so much. She kisses Maya to finally shut her up, and forgives her with a tight hug.

Claudine huffs as she falls asleep that night with the very girl who had been her top secret admirer and source of motivation from the very beginning.

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A/N: I think this was just the cutest idea! For little Maya who admired Claudine so much to have written her idol Claudine a letter, and for Claudine to have kept and cherished it all her life without knowing (until now) it was Maya, of all people, who wrote it. Just the kind of fateful thing I would expect from them.

And Maya trying to be a chivalrous idiot trying to write an updated version of her old letter, only to make things chaotic and worry Claudine, and then Maya has to make it right as gently as possible. Ughgh I love them...